CHAPTER 10
The next morning, Screed and Legassi opened their stand as usual, awaiting the day’s first customers. The day started off lazily, as usual, allowing the two goblins to have a breakfast in relative peace before the first battered group of ponies approached the machine with a pile of broken gear.
“Customers,” grinned Screed, standing up from his stool. “How can we serve you on this fine morning?” He was answered with a pile of junk dropped from the ponies’ bags onto the counter.
Armours in need of repair followed. The goblin put them inside the slot of the automatic blacksmith attachment one by one, then stood and watched as the device hammered away.
“Hey! Remember, that robe is dry clean only,” he heard a mare shout behind him. He turned and nodded with a smile, suppressing the urge to growl. Customers meant business, the lifeblood of his existence, but that didn’t make the insufferable ones any more bearable.
While Screed was taking care of the repair services, Legassi took care of the loot, quickly dividing the items into smaller piles that went into separate boxes, counting the change and giving the adventurers whatever wares they wanted; food and drinks were quickly taken, paid for and placed in the saddlebags.
“Do you haf any of thes?”
The goblin looked up. A lavender pegasus mare clad in deep red plate armor was standing over him, a long scroll held in her teeth. She spat it out on the counter and repeated: “Do you have any of these? I’m building a plot device and it seems I have a long list of gizmos to gather.”
Legassi picked up the paper and skimmed through it. As he continued down the list, his expression grew more and more surprised. Finally he put the paper back, pulled out a pencil and made some notes on it.
“This, this and this we can sell you right now. Those two we can get you by tomorrow. Now the last one… you’d have to go to Northrend and gather some ingredients for us…” He turned the paper over and scribbled something on the back.
The mare looked down on the new list. “Hmm… ok, ok, ok…I’ll come back to buy the rest once I’ve gathered those... Crystallized water? Isn’t it just ice?”
Legassi’s ears twitched with impatience. “Har, har… I’ve never heard that joke before. And those blades on your wings are made of ‘just steam’, aren’t they? What kind of quest do you need all those for anyway? It is a heck of shopping list.”
The mare picked the list up with her teeth and stuffed it into her bag. “Oh, it’s not a quest, just a private project.”
“I thought you said it was for a quest item,” said Legassi.
“No, no, I said it was for a plot device. Completely different.”
“A plot device?” The goblin raised an eyebrow. “What does it do?”
The pegasus, who was already leaving the stand, turned to look back at him with a smirk. “What do you think a ‘plot device’ does?” She paused for effect before finishing. “It makes engineers blush.”
She then left, swishing her tail, leaving the confused Legassi with a whole line of snickering customers.
The mare walked two houses down the street before turning a corner and hiding from view. Another pegasus mare, dressed in opulent priestess robes, was waiting there. The warrior handed her the list with a smile. “Just like you thought, Blossom; they don’t have it on hoof. You can proceed as planned.”
Blossomforth grabbed the list and stuffed it into her bag. She then glared at her friend. “Did you have to make a show of yourself? I told you to try to be subtle!”
“No point. These parts are unusual and he is a technician. He would have remembered me anyway. Now at least he doesn’t want to remember.”
“But what if he recognised you as my friend? Everypony knows you.”
“Hey! I may be a famous hero of Equestria, but there are hundreds of us now. And I don’t usually wear this armour. Don’t worry. To a shopkeeper, my face will be just another pony muzzle in the crowd.”
***
Carrot Top stopped to check if she was in the right place.
Ponyville had changed a lot since the Cataclysm, growing in all directions and almost doubling in population, not even counting the visiting adventurers. Apart from the landmarks, like Sugarcube Corner, which were rebuilt in their original shape, almost everything had been replaced, making it quite confusing for ponies who hadn’t visited for a long time. However, Carrot Top had been to Fluttershy’s, and she didn’t remember a forest growing there.
She stared again at the thick treeline in front of her. The road leading towards the bridge disappeared between the trees, a long line of magical lanterns marking the way with soft, green light.
“Seriously?” she huffed, before following the road warily. She hoped she wouldn’t need an escort just to get to a place that was still technically within the town. Walking slowly, she scanned her surroundings. Here and there, she caught glimpses of animals moving among the plant life. Fortunately, none of them seemed aggressive, and they would stay away from the road.
Finally crossing the bridge over the stream, Carrot Top turned right. Two thick trees marked the entrance to Fluttershy’s farm, a mailbox standing in front of the one to the right. Relieved at getting to her destination safely, the farmpony hastened her pace. She was already between the trees when something caught her eye, a name beginning to appear among the branches.
With a loud creak, the tree to the left swung its branch, gesturing helpfully towards the farm. It then returned to its original position, ignoring the blood-curdling scream of the frightened mare. Taking a few deep breaths to calm herself, Carrot Top looked up angrily at the tree, then proceeded to unwrap her limbs from around the mailbox. “Not an adventurer… leave me be…” she grumbled as she walked towards the cottage.
As it turned out, Fluttershy’s home had changed as much as its surroundings. Three trees had somehow grown where the cottage used to be and the house was now built on and around their branches, an elaborate construction that bore quite a lot of resemblance to Twilight’s library. Around it, the yard resembled a miniature village; pens and birdhouses of all shapes and sizes were spread out among the trees, giving each animal enough space while forming a picturesque whole. Eyes watched the approaching farmpony from every corner - there were the chickens, the snakes, the squirrels and mice, but Carrot Top could see many, many more; oversized insects, cubs of various predators, including what could only be dragon hatchlings, and some things that she didn’t have any idea how to properly name. How all those creatures could share the same space without conflict defied comprehension.
Returning to the matters at hoof, Carrot Top walked towards the house, doing her best to ignore a couple of fun-sized deadly predators watching her curiously. Climbing the stairs, she approached the entrance and peered into the house through an open door. Small animals scuttled out of sight, but apart from that, there was nopony inside.
“Hello?” called Carrot Top hesitantly. “Anypony home?” There was no response. Then again, the house was quite big.
She might be in the attic, or in the basement. Should I come in or not?
Before Carrot Top could solve her dilemma, her ears caught a voice from outside. Somepony was shouting, in a shrill voice… like a filly? Carrot Top turned around, looking for the source of the noise. It was coming from somewhere behind the house. Trotting down the stairs and around the tree trunks, the farmpony found a small, square building visibly isolated from everything else. Unlike all of the other nearby structures, it was made entirely of stone. From the inside, Carrot Top could hear angry growling and something that sounded like a struggle.
“Is anypony…”
She was interrupted by an angry roar and a gout of bright orange flame bursting out of the doorway. With a yelp of fear, she hit the ground, crawling backwards away.
“BAD DOG! SIT!” came a shout from the inside
There was another burst of orange flame and then silence. Slowly, Carrot Top’s flattened ears started to rise up, then the rest of her body. She twitched, ready to run, when something emerged from inside the small house. No, somepony. It was a young pony clad head to hoof in a thick fireproof suit, a pair of buckets levitating behind it. It went towards a small awning at the back of the main house and started undressing, putting the equipment away onto an empty rack.
As the suit’s head gear was removed, Carrot Top saw a head of a navy-blue unicorn filly. The girl turned, only now noticing the visitor. Quickly turning away, she grabbed a small wreath of wild flowers and put it on her head, then turned back towards Carrot Top, an enthusiastic smile on her face.
“WE HEARTILY WELCOME YOU TO FLUTTERSHY’S TEMPLE OF NATURE AND PETTING ZOO!” she shouted.
Carrot Top took a step back. The voice had somehow managed to flatten her mane. What was with that kid? “Aaannnd who are ‘we’ exactly?” she asked.
“Umm… WE, THE STAFF!” answered the filly with a wide grin. “THE NAME IS MOONSTONE, MISS!”
Carrot Top took another step back.”You don’t need to shout. I can hear you just fine.”
“Oh… We apologise,” said Moonstone, removing the rest of her protective suit.
Carrot Top’s eyes widened in realisation. Oh, so that’s who you are. This explains the voice.
The farmpony pointed her hoof at a symbol on the girl’s tabard, a rearing yellow filly in a blue field. “You’re a Cutie Mark Crusader, aren’t you?
“Yes, one of the five original members, in fact!” smiled the filly.
“So…” Carrot Top pointed awkwardly towards the stone house behind her. “That thing over there… were you trying to get your cutie mark?”
Moonstone responded with a blank stare. “Of course not. This is not a task for the untrained. It would be too dangerous. It is just a part of staff duties.”
Carrot Top turned slowly towards the stone house. Just on cue, another gout of flame emerged through the door. “Wait… you are just a filly! If this is so dangerous, why do you do it? What was Fluttershy thinking!?”
Moonstone sighed. “We don’t know what Miss Fluttershy was thinking to bring it here in the first place. But once she had, it is our responsibility while she is away.” She straightened and puffed her chest. “We have proven to be skilled enough to care for it safely and worthy of her trust!” She paused to study the look of utter horror on the farmpony’s face.
“But… but…” sputtered Carrot Top, “isn’t it illegal? And what do your parents think of this?”
Moonstone rummaged through the gathered equipment and produced a green cloak, pulling it over herself to complete her druid attire. “By… her Majesty Princess Luna’s decree, this grove belongs to the Cenarion Circle and falls under its law. Everything is perfectly legal! And none of my family have objected.” The sentence rolled off her tongue as if she had rehearsed it. Carrot Top couldn’t help but think the filly must have needed to say it quite frequently.
Moonstone cleared her throat and trotted closer to Carrot Top, looking up at her with curiosity. “Soooo… what can we help you with?”
Carrot Top blinked repeatedly before finally remembering the reason for going there in the first place. “I… I wanted to learn something about local animals…”
The filly’s smile widened in an unsettling way. “A student! IT WILL BE OUR HONOR TO INITIATE YOU INTO THE DRUIDIC LORE!”
Carrot Top took another step back and this time her eyes actually darted towards the way out of the clearing. “I don’t need to learn everything. Just a few details on…”
Moonstone zipped forward, stopping well within Carrot Top’s personal space. “That would be wrong! One cannot understand Nature except as a whole! We cannot risk you getting misinformed!”
The farmpony put her hoof on the filly’s shoulder and pushed her away slightly, her eyes narrowing. “Listen here, missy. I know you’re enthusiastic and all, and I see you like using big, adult words. But I don’t have the time for…”
She paused, as her instincts warned her that she was being watched. Suddenly, everything around her was moving in the same, slow rhythm. From everywhere around the clearing, multiple eyes were fixed on her, approaching slowly.
Flinching away in panic, Carrot Top withdrew her hoof from Moonstone’s shoulder. “I… I mean, I have a lot to do on my farm and…”
She looked around. The creatures were still approaching. Moonstone was looking up at the farmpony’s face, waiting for her to finish, seemingly oblivious to her charges’ behaviour.
“... well, I’m sure I can find the time to listen to a longer lecture,” Carrot Top finished, forcing a smile, her eyes still darting around, trying to observe all animals at once.
Moonstone’s wide grin instantly returned. The filly looked around the clearing. “Right then, let us begin, as we have practiced!” she addressed the gathered animals. The creatures stopped, some of them scattering towards their homes, only to return dragging… musical instruments? Carrot Top watched in astonishment as a white rabbit took a central place on top of a box, a conductor’s baton in paw. As the animals began playing a slow melody, the unicorn filly swirled around and took a deep breath.
She isn’t going to…
“Look at this place, filled with so many wonders...”
She is.
***
It was many hours later when Carrot Top finally left the tree house, a new green cloak draped across her back and a flower wreath on her head. Grumbling angrily, she stopped and closed her eyes. Experimentally, she stood up on her hind legs and rubbed her front hooves together. A faint green aura appeared between them, but when the mare released the spell, there was no effect.
Typical… “a simple healing spell meant to alleviate the pain of battle injuries”, useless against an ordinary headache… I guess I’ll have to go look for some herbs.
She stopped, thinking of the implications of going to the forest to practice herbal medicine. Shuddering, she continued on, completely forgetting about the treant at the entrance until he saluted her.
Carrot Top flinched away and then her face turned red. “Still not an adventurer!” she shouted at the tree’s impassively wooden face. She then turned away and quickly trotted off. “Grr… go pollinate yourself…” she finished under her breath.
***
Much earlier the same day, Blossomforth descended upon Carrot Top’s farm. Landing in the main yard, the pegasus priestess headed directly toward Vinyl Scratch’ stand.
“May I have a moment?” she said, putting her front hooves on the counter and peering into the chaotic mess behind it.
A disheveled looking blue mane emerged, followed by a set of large glasses. Vinyl Scratch spat out a tangle of cables. “No prob. What can I do you for?
Blossomforth spent a moment looking down on her with a raised eyebrow, before finally remembering what she came there for. “I need some professional advice concerning engineering.”
It was Vinyl’s turn to raise an eyebrow. “Engineering? But… You’re a much higher level. You do those weather balloons and all.”
“I do,” said Blossomforth. “But still there are things you’re better than me at. I need your advice on one such matter.”
“And that would be?”
“I want you to teach me about wubs.”
***
Miss Carrot Top
The device you have requested has passed the preliminary testing stages. Within a week it should be ready for delivery to Miss Berry Punch’ establishment. The expected baking efficiency has been increased by 20% and the technology allows for improvements in the recipe, as planned. The cost of the device will not go beyond the initial assessment.
Yours Faithfully
Blossomforth
P.S.
Please make sure to destroy this letter upon receipt. With the constant break-ins into your farm, it would be all too easy for it to fall into the hands of your competition
Ixyourmom read the letter again and smirked. That could get him a few extra pieces of silver. Putting the letter into his back pocket, he heard a soft ‘ping’ of his map notes updating.
Ponies… what kind of idiot leaves a letter like this on top of a barrel in her storage cellar?
Moving with grace surprising for his bulky frame, the human walked up the stairs and melded into the shadow of the barn.
And Ixyourmom doesn't even stop to think if it was a trap for his employer.
3811804 video game logic at its finest
Dangit, Carrot Top needs to invest in some better security!
Moonstone wouldn't happen to be one of Luna's ult accounts, would she?
3811852 She is. Note the odd speech patterns and the animals odd defensiveness. Plus in the original story, Celestia and Luna outright said that their alts were the last two signers of the CMC's guild.
3811812 What I can't tell is if these rogues are players or mobs. I mean I thought the names were a dead give away, but they really act more like mindless mobs than player characters. For one, most players would have gladly gone through Carrot Top rather than simply trying to escape by running out the door. Unless these rogues are so dimwitted as to not realize that they can recloak after killing her and getting away scot-free.
Also a good Horde raid group needs to go for the "For the Horde!" achievement at some point.
You know, give Celestia and Luna a taste of the after life. I say this mainly because this is one of the few settings this won't end in tears and feel like an immense downer. Plus the two can spend their downtime on their alts. Not too mention it would be nice to see the Horde actually achieve something after their defeat at the Ursa as well as doing something to actually merit being enemies with the ponies as opposed to being neutral.
That was one of the more annoying parts of the original. Not just because it pits ponies against Horde bronies, (though that is annoying) but because in the original the reason was fucking weaksauce. Join the Alliance! It's awesome! Also you'll be drawing your ponies into a very bloody, very long war, which might end with plenty of your ponies perma-dying. Just FYI.
3814085 Since all the creatures living there are a permanent part of the world, the line between a player and an NPC is really thin. The only indicator is that npcs are able to ignore some of the player rules.
As for behaviour, the premise of the story is that Equestria is both a video game and a real world at the same time. The characters' reactions are defined by the game, to a point, but at the same time they are living people (or ponies) and have personalities too.
The rogue from the previous chapter opted for "stun and run" rather than killing, because ponies are living, thinking creatures - even if you can't be properly punished by law, they will remember if you kill one of them. It's not like in the game, where dying solves all the problems.
On the other hand, this chapter's rogue falls for what seems like an obvious trap... but that's how the game works. Being duped by obvious schemes is part of being a character and they can't help it any more than cult pony guards could help their poor aggro range. It's a part of who they are, but they can usually get even in the next quest chain, so that's ok.
Also, epic battles with the Horde are a part of this world, but don't really fit within the scope of this particular story. Any Horde player capable of threatening Celestia could kill Carrot Top by sneering in her general direction.
3814490 So is that quest for the goblins that the rogues are doing similar to Gamon's original role, as a neutral quest NPC? Because that'd be kinda funny as Gamon was a rogue specific quest mob. And that was a frustrating as hell quest!
3814550 Wait and see... (argh... I know I make you guys waaaaaait )
Sounds like Cloud Kicker's thinking of getting into some ERP.
3818006 Enterprise Resource Planning?
Oddly appropriate
3818025
3816361 The wait is only bad for those without....alternate methods.
3994874
I'm still hoping it can get you to write a sequel
A plot device? LOL
Northrend mats? That's what alts are for! Ah, I farmed up so much crystalized water fishing in Wrath...
Ah, the scheme is underway.
Loving Fluttershy's new abode... and what's this in the back? Sounds like somepony got the core hound pet.
Fluttershy's Temple of Nature? Ha. I wouldn't be surprised if she's got a moonwell lying around there somewhere.
Moonstone huh? oh ho ho ho ho
And she's as fun as I'd hoped she would be. This whole section has be grinning goofily, non stop.
The treant, a gift from Keeper Remulos himself, no doubt. Fluttershy has a better druid grove just for herself than all of poor, ruined Stormwind...
Wub based engineering? Well, there was that sonic-shield trinket from Wrath, as I recall.
Oh man, but the last straw was (one again) the supposedly confidential letter falling in the hands of an adventurer. LOL. Classic. It can never NOT happen, which is why I'm glad that it was clearly meant to be found. Heh.
3814085
Well, in my defense, I tried not to make it much about Alliance vs Horde at all.
90% of the story was just meant to be poking fun of WoW's oddities and foibles that I felt were pretty much universal. Remember, too, this was back when there were no such things as neutral playable races, so it had to be A or H. I really didn't want to tell an Ally vs Horde story. I just wanted to make fun of all the silly things in MMOs and WoW.
If it helps, you can consider it canon that a Horde raid (for revenge) managed to kite Celestia all the way into the Everfree to then aggro her on the Ursa, producing a truly youtube worthy spectacle.
I know that's a fight I'd like to see.
4008148 One problem with that is even if there weren't neutral races in WoW at the moment of writing, it doesn't take any brainpower to think of making the ponies neutral. Second the reasoning was pretty atrocious as it has Celestia and Luna pretty much agree to going to war for no reason and immediately after a major crisis.
Plus by ignoring the factions, you in turn ignored of what makes Warcraft Warcraft. Still all that is minor in comparison to the disconnection issue the original had later on in the story. It got to the point it actually took a month or two to go back and finish.
4008449
Well, I'm sorry you feel that way.
If you want to go over any issues or problems, though, it would probably be most appropriate to take it to PMs. I think my record shows that I'm always open minded towards healthy discussion and criticism.
"Well hello there, Luna's alt."
All hail BEST PRINCESS' alt love it!
Yeah, no one expects ponies to get sneaky. Boy are these goblins in for a surprise!