Duality of Perception: Black and White

by sweeT2010Tooth

The Bright Lights

Dear Journal,

Mama doesn’t want me going outside at night. She says it is too dangerous. I spend my days playing with my friends in our little village. We don’t have a whole lot, but we make the most of it. At night, I watch the world outside my window and would wait for the bright lights to shine on the horizon. Oh, they are beautiful mama! I wonder if papa is at the place those bright lights are. If not, maybe he sees them too every night. I miss papa, mama! You said he went away and wouldn’t be coming back. I’d ask and ask but the answer was always the same, “Baby, papa left us a while ago. In the same way free leaves blow.” After watching the bright lights for a while, I laid my head down to sleep.

In my dreams, papa was waiting for me at where the bright lights shown. He raised his hoof beckoning me to come. Should I go, mama? Is papa waiting for me? The bright lights would shine and papa’s smiling face would be inviting, but there were other things in that dream too. Where the bright lights did not shine many eyes would follow my every movement. It scared me to move, mama! But I managed to start moving to the bright lights. I started out in a slow walk with the eyes following. One or two pair of eyes would seem to move with me. My slow walk got faster until I was running in a full gallop. Mama, the eyes were following at the same pace! The only thing that kept me going was papa’s smiling face…but then he and the bright lights disappeared. I screamed for him to return only to find the shapeless forms closing in on me.

Almost every dream was like that mama. I’d go to school and play outside only in the day like a good colt. But I miss papa. I know understanding how an immortal made us zebras only rhyme in speech and not thought is important, but wasn’t finding papa just as much? School days were spent looking out the window hoping to see the bright lights. This was silly because they only shown during the night. They made me think of papa. After school, my friends and I would play outside the same as we did any other day. That is until a mysterious zebra shaman came to our village.

All the children ran up to this mare asking where she came from. We don’t get many visitors much in the same way few of us leave the village. She let us know of lands far away that made us look on in amazement: cities with huts that stretched to the sky, cities that never slept where most everypony went out at night, cities with a majestic and eloquent flair, and small ones – such as ours – that lived out their days in happiness. Just as quick as she came, she started to leave. I watched her trot off as my friends went back to their homes whispering excitedly about what she said. This was my chance to find out about papa! I caught up with her and asked if many zebra like my papa were in these ‘cities.’

“I have seen far few and almost none. There’s a reason for this young one. However, it is possible your papa might be there. If he is, I would not know where. In your heart, he has always remained. It is there we keep memory of loved ones retained.”

With that said she left. I watched her go, looked back at the village, and back to where she stood. I couldn’t hold back my feelings of longing anymore, mama! If papa was out there, I needed to find him. It was already getting dark so I decided to make a journey to the bright lights tomorrow. Mama never wanted me to go out at night and I wanted to be a good colt.

That night I had a different dream. I saw papa smiling and the bright lights. I saw the eyes following my movements. But, before I could walk forward, a hoof held me back. I would be scared, mama, but it felt familiar almost like papa’s touch. Then I heard papa’s voice, “Please don’t go there son. Chase the rising - but not the setting - sun.” I woke up and saw it was still dark out. Looking out, I saw the bright lights but also something else. In the dark, I couldn’t make it out but it looked like monsters in the darkness. They started to look at me, mama! It was like they were laughing! I hid under the blankets until morning.

When morning came, I gathered materials up and put them in my school sack. I didn’t go to school though. Instead I headed out of the village to where the bright lights were. I needed to find papa. Mama…I hope you understand.

Mama used to say not everything is Black and White. But, Mama, all I ever see is the darkness and the light.