Ceremi has always stood out among the other changelings, and not just because she's Chrysalis's daughter. There has always been something different about the way she thinks, a certain spark in her eye that pushes her to invent and improve.
But when her ideas are repeatedly shunned by everyling else, she decides to go out to other lands and prove they work. Being gone on her journey, she misses the planning and execution of the Canterlot Invasion, and is blamed for it's failure when she arrives back at the hive.
Outraged, Ceremi leaves the hive, vowing to never come back, and starts on an even longer journey to find out her place in the world. But Ceremi soon discovers her mother is not Chrysalis, and she is not purely a changeling......
First ever fan-fiction, so be kind! Constructive criticism is welcome, though.
I like it.
2248039
I'll give this one a chance.. don't disappoint ;)
1My review (:
Pros:
1. I love the pacing and they way you describe things, it feels like movie pacing somehow its the first successful story Ive read that feels like a movie yet is written well.
2.You really show the characters emotions well the first baby scene somehow felt so warm.
3. Your characters are already showing personality on the first page diage is intresting.
cons:
So far only one.
Ceremi is starting to sound like a disney princess due to her situation(Chrysalis taking care of her like a aunt.) and how blessed she already sounding.(Her parents gave her away her looking like royalty e.c.t) I hope she will have reasonable flaws though her being disney princess like isnt bad either it can be good if done right.
If I see another con in the next chapter Ill write it down (:
"Silking"....I like it. It definitely works. Sorry it took me awhile to get around to commenting. Life and stuff. You know how it goes. I like this story, and I was quite elated to see that it updated. Can't wait to see more.
-C.Storm
4912211 Yeah, I get it. Life was what made me procrastinate so much on this.
But I'm so glad you like it so much! And yes, "silking" is pretty awesome. :P (why is there no tongue out teasing emoticon?).
Is this story dead?
I really hope that it is not.
And then it died.