Celestia has a Big Butt!

by I Vicious I

Magic Pancakes

The first rays of dawn spilled into the castle dining room, and cast a soft, golden glow on the opulent tapestries that adorned the walls. The air was filled with the rich aroma of a hearty breakfast—Celestia, having just awakened, eagerly dug into a towering stack of pancakes. The scent of warm maple syrup mingled with the buttery goodness of the pancakes, creating an enticing fragrance that enveloped the room. Celestia's fork cut through the pancakes with a satisfying sound, the crispy edges giving way to a fluffy interior. Each bite sent a symphony of flavors dancing across her taste buds—sweet, savory, and comforting. The clink of her fork against the plate resonated through the air as she indulged in the morning feast.

Meanwhile, Luna sat across from her, fatigue evident in the droop of her eyes. Her movements were slower and deliberate, as if she was desperate to conserve energy with each bite. She held an orange with her magic, the citrusy aroma wafted through the air as she bit directly into the orange, having not bothered to peal it first. The tangy scent mingled with the other breakfast aromas, provided a refreshing contrast to the richness of the pancakes.

In this early morning in the castle dining room, the senses wove together to paint a vivid picture of two sisters—one savored the dawn of a new day with a feast, the other found solace of her delicious unpeeled fruit, both bound by the shared experience of a royal breakfast.

"Sister, there's an article about us in the newspaper this morning!" Celestia exclaimed excitedly. Luna's eyes remained half-closed, fixed on the spread of food before her. Unperturbed by the freshly squeezed orange juice in her vicinity, Luna opted for a more indulgent sip, her lips pursed around the neck of the maple syrup bottle from which she took a deep gulp, she savored the sweet richness that flooded her senses.

Mouth agape, Celestia stared in astonishment at Luna's unconventional behavior before she reluctantly redirected her attention back to the newspaper before her. "It says here that, amidst the growing concerns about obesity in Equestria, Princess Luna, with her slender physique, has become the epitome of fitness, setting a positive example for all of us," she read aloud. She cast a bemused glance back at Luna, who has casually bitten into an unpeeled banana, Celestia couldn't help but wonder, "What is wrong with this pony?" Amused by the peculiar scene, she mused to herself, "Well, at least all that fiber has contributed to her trim figure."

In her exhausted state, Luna managed to turn her head in Celestia's direction, in an effort to urge her to continue reading. "However, our Princess of the Sun has been anything but a prime example of healthy eating," the last words, prompted Luna's eyes to widen. Celestia paused, she sensed the tension in the air. "Rumor has it that Celestia's diet is mainly composed of candy, cakes, and other pastries. In fact, her favorite food is said to be pancakes, of which she devours five pounds a day." Luna, in disbelief, involuntarily spat out her half-eaten pumpkin rind.

Her exhaustion subsided as maniacal laughter filled the room. Celestia, now in a state of dismay, reluctantly continued to read the article against her better judgment. "We hope that Celestia can find something other than food deep inside her and improve her diet. Until then, it is our professional opinion that Princess Celestia has a substantial posterior," the article concluded.

The only thing louder than the devastation Celestia felt was the roaring laughter from Luna. She slipped back into her Canterlot voice, shaking the entire room. "Tia's got a big butt, Tia's got a big butt," she chanted, as pieces of pumpkin rind flew out of her mouth. Celestia pursed her lips in exasperation.

"This isn't funny, Luna; it's really embarrassing. Millions of ponies read the Canterlot Chronicle," Celestia exclaimed, her tone a mixture of frustration and embarrassment.

She turned away, her regal composure momentarily shaken, and quietly retraced the lines of the article, as if the act of rereading could somehow alter the disconcerting words that had found their way into print. "And I don't consume five pounds of pancakes each day," Luna snickered, she had covered her mouth with her hoof, but it did little to mask her joy as she pointed theatrically to the stack of pancakes which towered over Celestia's plate. "I only prepare such a bounty because I intend to share them with you." Luna's laughter echoed through the room, which mingled with the air of disbelief that hung around the princesses.

Luna rolled her eyes. "Tia, I never eat the pancakes you make, and we both know it," she grinned, and emitted a playful chuckle. "Just look at the bright side — now we know why the stallions are always dreaming about you." Her words carried a mischievous undertone, and a sparkle of amusement that danced in her eyes. Celestia blushed, caught off guard. Luna continued with a teasing grin, "There's also some truth to the pastries. Your private fridge and pantry are filled with cakes, and I'm fully aware that you've been sneaking slices of pizza from my own fridge." Luna fixed a pointed glare at Celestia, who attempted to muster an innocent expression but failed to conceal the guilt in her eyes.

Celestia looked away. "Just the one time," she mumbled, her tone almost a sheepish admission. Luna shook her head, a playful glint in her eyes. "Okay, maybe I steal some of your pizza occasionally." Their exchange of confessions was accompanied by a shared chuckle, a lighthearted air settled between them.

Luna stood up from her seat and gracefully stepped beside Celestia. "Besides, I think they kind of have a point," she mused with a mischievous glint in her eyes. Luna playfully stuck her hoof into Celestia's flank, and it yielded under her touch. "You do have a big butt," she declared, which punctuated her words with a playful nudge.

"Better than having a box cutter for a butt like you, Luna," Celestia remarked, her tone carrying a sharper edge. The room's atmosphere shifted, and the exchange took on a more serious note, the weight of the words hanging in the air

"Oh, Tia, I've seen our citizens' dreams, and trust me, they seem to prefer my box cutter butt over yours," Luna remarked, her tone carrying a hint of teasing defiance. She playfully shook her rear at Celestia, the moment more of a challenge than a shared joke, and a subtle undercurrent of rivalry lingered in the air.

Luna giggled, "I'm too tired to fight now, Tia. I'm going to bed. If you actually care enough to do something, I recommend you stop teleporting everywhere and that you cut out the pancakes from your diet." Celestia curled her lips in anger, but deep down, she knew Luna was right. Luna turned to make her way to her bedroom, leaving Celestia to stew in her emotions. Luna took exaggerated steps on her way out, playfully she shook her butt with each stride, a deliberate act to tease Celestia further.

The next morning, Luna descended into the royal dining room, greeted by the soft glow of morning sunlight that bathed the room in a regal ambiance. The air carried the inviting aroma of freshly brewed coffee and the sweet notes of a well-prepared breakfast spread. As Luna entered, the cool, smooth surface of the polished marble beneath her hooves provided a grounding sensation, complemented by the soft touch of the regal velvet drapes. The atmosphere held a mild, comforting warmth, and as she approached the table, the taste of yesterday morning's tension lingered in the air, adding a nuanced layer to the flavors of the upcoming breakfast. There, she found Celestia quietly eating a banana, the room pregnant with unspoken words and unresolved emotions.

The table before her was now adorned with an array of fruits instead of the customary pastries. With a magical hum, Celestia skillfully peeled a banana, and then casually tossed the banana's insides into her open mouth.

"Ew, Tia, you only eat the guts and not the peel? Gross." Celestia glanced back at Luna, a perplexed expression on her face. What could possibly be wrong with her younger sister?

Comments

[Max Stroberger]

Ok you are great.

[Max Stroberger]

You know I think I know why Luna eats everything on the fruit maybe she spent so long without any food that she eats everything because she doesn't remember the taste, or maybe back before she was banished they had to eat everything because throwing food away was waist full and to show respect they had to eat everything.

[I Vicious I]

11781777
Maybe they didn't know any better back then lol

[Max Stroberger]

11781779
As Discord would say "one of life's delightfully mundane mysteries".

[I Vicious I]

11781776
Have you read anything else of mine? I think the most similar piece is the Pizza Eclipse one with Luna.

[Max Stroberger]

11781783
Ok I just got done reading it and I love it, although it kinda reminds me of my least favorite thing anyone has ever wrote, the time Twilight pranked Celestia don't read it if you want to remain sane, basically it's April fools day and filly Twilight knows about Celestia loving pranks so Twilight puts a Carolina reaper in Celestia's cake, unfortunately at dinner Celestia's sense of smell detected the pepper so Celestia gets back at Twilight by distracting her using Cadence while Twilight isn't looking Celestia puts the pepper cake in front of her so Twilight eats it and starts screaming she even ends up drinking toilet water to try and feel better, all that is bad enough but the real kick in the nuts comes when Celestia reveals she actually likes eating pepper that is hotter than the sun so in actuality she hurt Twilight for no reason at all and thought it was funny, I was furious.

[Shakespearicles]

Bendy, is this an alt?

[Charlie_K]

Don't get me wrong, it's absolutely hilarious. But the story felt, well... a little too lean for properly addressing such a heavy topic.

[Herald of Opera]

Celestia is so huge that there isn't really a medical precedent to say whether or not she's actually fat. The charts simply don't reach her stunning heights.

[Bendy]

11781898
Nonsense, there appears to be no growth macro in this story.

[Dan]

I never peel potatoes, mangoes and carrots. That's where the nutrients are.

[Dan]

Now I'm depressed remembering how https://www.fimfiction.net/story/9135/a-slice-of-life was abandoned.

[PrincePegacornV]

The story opened with that scene from the episode "A Royal Problem", but then diverted into something else.
What is curious to me is that I found the other day on Derpi that someone had created a 3D short animation with Twilight Sparkle being asked numerous questions by an unseen Human, and one of the questions was about whose butt was bigger: Celestia, or Luna? Twilight gleefully answered with Luna, adding that Luna herself told Twilight.
I just wanted to share the animation (sorry, I have don't know how to link it), as the story reminded me of that animation.

[I Vicious I]

11781898
I'm not bendy. Looking at his profile, it looks like he does M rated stuff. Not my style.

[Shakespearicles]

11782049
media.tenor.com/yQ_XPWFWwBcAAAAC/spiderman-defoe.gif

[Crimson Eclipse77]

That was funny! The real question would be is she fat or is she an average weight for a horse?

[RandomCommentor]

"Ew, Tia, you only eat the guts and not the peel? Gross." Celestia glanced back at Luna, a perplexed expression on her face. What could possibly be wrong with her younger sister?

Horses, and by extension ponies, can eat and digest the banana peel.

Also, nice reference if a bit cliche.

[LayTheBlackToRest]

"Better than having a box cutter for a butt like you, Luna,"

Was that a DWK reference? From his Totally Legit Recap of the Royal Problem episode?

[ThePinkedWonder]

Ten bits say Bigbutt Celestia goes back to her usual diet of eating pancakes and cake again in a month.

[assbutt2]

Tia, nobody's complaining about the size of your ass 🍑😘

[Lord Shadow Eclipse]

11782366
I'm certainly not

[I Vicious I]

11782329
Yes it was, good catch.

[I Vicious I]

11781791
Yeah, I try to have karma be logical and proportional.

[deadpansnarker]

…And she cannot lie. 🎶

[Okie Brony]

11782669
You other bronies can't deny
That when a pony trots in
With a little bitty waist
And a round flank in your face
You get sprung.
🍌 🍑

---

That was fun.

[AvoidingFever17]

"Ew, Tia, you only eat the guts and not the peel? Gross." Celestia glanced back at Luna, a perplexed expression on her face. What could possibly be wrong with her younger sister?

A lot
A LOT

[AvoidingFever17]

11781949
Are you sure?

[AvoidingFever17]

11782049
Thats fair

[AvoidingFever17]

11783062
WOO!

[Okie Brony]

11786039
Tia... got... BACK!!!

I may have been drunk when I posted that comment.

I regret nothing.

[I Vicious I]

11786317
It's ok, I much enjoyed the comment

[Okie Brony]

11786324
I much enjoyed your story!

[AvoidingFever17]

11786317
Dont regret it!