Twilight let out a remorseful groan of frustration whilst staring at the pad of paper, a strange, human writing utensil clutched in one balled up fist. "I can't believe how hard this is..." she muttered, staring at the ball point pen angrily. Her face set itself into a look of determination though, despite how bad her 'handwriting' was. It would take practice to get better, but she wanted to write something now, and it wouldn't wait.
Dear Princess Celestia,
I know this report is horrendously tardy, but given the circumstances, I hope you will understand. It is also not about the magic of friendship, but a more terrible matter at hoof. I apologize again for how often that seems to be the case... As I was saying, I have been displaced somehow from Equestria. It happened by my own hooves, and was my own, foalish fault. It is hard to appropriately put my distress into words. I don't think I've ever been this worried before.
The land here is called Earth, and it is hard to explain, but I will do my best. Things are stranger than strange here. The... natives, do not possess magic for starters. I will get back to that later. They are called humans, and are quite interesting. One has given me shelter, kindness, friendship, and is responsible for my safety and recovery thus far.
Twilight paused while writing, her expression had softened a bit while writing. She used the back of one fur-less hand to wipe at a tear that dribbled down her cheek. With a deep breath, she set the pen back to paper.
There are no ponies here, and the humans do not possess any way I could get home. I imagine, if you ever read this, then these words will carry less weight, but... I miss you princess, I miss everypony, so much. I am certain that Spike has eaten all of the ice cream in the library by now.
A shuddering breath escaped Twilight, the pen escaped her hand and lay beside her on the bed.
Being around Jo and Alice had made her think of her family, of Applejack, Rainbow, Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie and everypony else she could possibly remember back in Equestria. It so happened that today was also the day she had routinely written a weekly friendship report to her mentor, until an incident concerning a poorly conceived spell changed things a little. Still, she had gotten the urge to write one, her friends near to her thoughts throughout.
The pen lifted again and wrote on in her awkward grip.
I have come to grips with being here though, so forgive me for using my letter to vent my feelings and fears, princess. Perhaps I should begin a diary, instead?
Twilight stared at the scribbled words a moment, before then continuing.
Well, maybe not that, but nevertheless allow me to report some of the things I have discovered here thus far, in detail. Where to begin...
The humans' advancements over-encompass our own greatly, princess, though they have no direct control of magic, much like diamond dogs or gryphons. They are very resourceful, however, and have created a plethora of wondrous devices and tools. I feel I have only scratched the surface of these as well. I can't imagine what may have driven them to create things of this nature. Many of them are mundane in use, strangely. Tools such as these perform tasks that could easily be done by them or a pony, or a simpler device, but they were made anyway. Others, do things that I would have never imagined were I to live as long as you! It's breath taking in a way, if nothing else I look forward to at least learning all manner of strange new things here.
Speaking of strange, princess, that brings me to what I mentioned before. As I said, there is no magic here, and the very fundamental aspects of this place are entirely different from our own world. The moon can be seen during the day, the sun is controlled by naturally occurring forces rather than anypony in charge of it. In fact, with no magic here I can't imagine how this human world has a sun at all. I suspect it must exist in some other state? I greatly wish to investigate that.
It is just a suspicion as of yet, princess, but I highly suspect that magic is not the basic building block of all creatures and life at present on this world. Oh don't even get me started on the world itself, this place is round, and surrounded by empty 'space'. I don't even want to imagine the implications, after thinking about the 'rotation' that Jo, oh, she's my host by the way, I'll talk about her, too. Where was I? Oh yes, why aren't I falling off this thing!? The speed I'm moving at right now is thirty kilometers per second. Over one hundred thousand kilometers per hour. The human world is fascinating, I wish so dearly I had my magic to do some real studying... Speaking of, after landing, my crater formed several dozen strange looking, leg length crystal 'chunks'. Amazingly enough these seem to be entirely magical in nature. I hypothesize these could in fact be what remain of my old body, or perhaps the magic residue from it, or possibly my potion? I'm not sure, I have no way to tell. They seem stable though, and I'm hoping to think of some way I can make use of them at a later date.
So, magic seems to not exist here other than myself. If this is the case though, why are other constants in our realms of existence so similar? Why is two plus two not five here? Or food taste like purple, or something equally silly? I will need to run some tests somehow, just like everything else. If nothing else, there is quite a bit here to keep me preoccupied should I fail to return home... I will talk to Jo about it soon, I have yet to because of everything that has happened, there is just so much! It's very shocking, and my brain feels like it's about to pop when I try to get a handle on it all, which is saying a lot I think. Oh, that sounded a little prideful, forgive me, princess.
Twilight smiled cheerfully down at the page, happier now that she was in her element. She paused to rotate her strange wrist and work the kinks of of her arm and 'fingers'. It was a great deal more difficult to write with human hands. As a unicorn, writing had been second nature, and very easy for her to do without thinking about it. As a human, she had to concentrate her utmost just to hold onto, and use the pen she held, as well as make the hoofwriting legible. Uggh, I'll never get used to how different everything is here. She took another moment to ground and scratch her head, then sighed and continued to write.
At first, I thought that perhaps life here had merely advanced differently, but it's more than that. Even the food tastes different, like plants, which by the way somehow match our own in appearance. At least, they do as far as appearances go. By the way, human way of life seems to be very industrial. Applejack would have a fit learning how crops are grown here. Oh dear, I'm getting off track though, princess. My point is that magic isn't a part of this world at all, and I presume that will make my return home that much more difficult.
The sound of laughter echoed through the nearby wall. Twilight recognized it as Jo and her interesting friend, Alice. At first, Twilight had seen Jo as a rather strange creature, not just in body, but personality as well. After a few days with her though, she now recognized more than a few traits in the human that she herself had once possessed. It was interesting to think about for the castaway mare.
Twilight's pen began to scribble once more.
I am safe though, teacher, and although I am so far from you all, you are all close to my thoughts, and my heart. It isn't something that I've said to you before, princess, but you're my friend, as much as everypony else, and more. Both you and them will always be my friends, no matter what the circumstances of where we may be in relation to one another. I won't ever give up my quest to get back to Equestria. For now, know that I am safe.
Twilight's eyes ran down the page, it had taken her well over an hour to write the entire passage. A nifty little clock beside her borrowed bed let her know that much. Still, it was legible, and she decided it would more than suffice.
Goodnight princess, I will see you again.
Your ever faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle
MOAR!
It would be cool if Twilight learns and maybe trys some video games like Halo or tf2 or some other games or youtube.
2877632
She would be traumatized for life! o.o I was considering her beating the world's high score for tetris though...
2877632
She must play halo. MUST.
Need some help writing stories about Twi on Earth? I think I can handle that. Shoot me a message if you have anything specific.
Someone really should show her how to hold it properly. (And get her a real fountain pen, why not?)
You're so evil.
2878117
What did I do now!?
They seem stable though, and I'm hoping to I can think of something to make use of them at a later date.
sounds like you mixed two different versions of the sentence during editing.
2878190
It doth happen on occasion. Ty for pointing that out sire!
2877660
Give her Portal.
2878245
That hold the potential for trauma too, though...
"You will be baked. And then there will be cake."
2878405
Yeah, but nowhere near as bad as the indiscriminate comedic sociopathy of TF2 or the glorification of war (as I see it, anyway) in the CoD series.
Besides, from the very START of Portal it is clear that something is wrong.
Just give here Killing Floor. Everyone loves shooting up evil clones.
SpaceChem seems like it would be right up Twilight's alley, but she might be disappointed to learn that SpaceChem reactors don't actually exist.
Also, there's a story here where the mane 6 try various video games, and there's one chapter about Tetris.
2879879 yes, but I still think it's something else. The other stories this is connected to have Rarity also notice an odd taste. Like something is missing. Usually he only adds that if there's something more going on. I don't think the ponies are all "there" like they're being projected.
2879993
I can't make her if she doesn't want to see it.
2877323 I recall the first and second chapters. The rest I do not recall finding anything wrong with. Thanks again!
2880179 No problemo, reading back through they really didn't seem as though they belonged at all. I wrote this chapter last year while in Afghanistan, I was a lot more pent up back there.
Joe: "Well Twi, the reason we do not fall off of this planet is very simple. The planet's mass is so great, that it bends the fabric of space and time itself inward, and this fabric of space and time is pushing everything on Earth towards the ground. Simple, right?"
Twilight: 'speechless face here'
Joe: Uh, Twilight? Are you alright?
2880190 Well, thank you for your service!
2880244
T'ain't nothin' pardner.
Would Twilight not refer to Earth as spherical? And wasn't there a globe of the world in the background of an episode? And would Twilight have a "handle" or a "hoofle" on things?
2881092
Likely a hoofle, disregard things I contend with the episodes, the two of them hint heavily that the shows aren't accurate in their entirety.
Going with the premise that I did, that being that the show was inspired by the other world, somehow. It stands to reason that things would get skewed along the way. Animators taking liberties, even inspired subconscious being overwritten by the writers in lieu of things that better fit the shows targeted demographic and theme. Etc.
2877660
Actually it would be hilarious if she tried Halo and went all stategy/logic/egghead on it. Figuring out optimal attack strategies and using psychoanalysis against opponents and such.
Jo goes out to shop, comes back to find Twi screaming Equestrian obscenities into a mic as she soars up the XBL leaderboards.
I wonder what Twilight would think of GTAV if she saw someone playing it.
If we're talking games, try giving her a copy of Dwarf Fortress to play with. It's a lot more involved then most games... And it's only at version 0.34.11
According to the movie, Twilight has horrible handwriting too. I think it's because she makes Spike do it for her. Her never having hands before is no excuse.
2882970
In the contrail story we wrote her as having impeccable magic-writing.
2882974 writing with a glowing aura that shoots from your skull and ignores all boundaries of physics is sheer laziness.
2913023
There are two big updates coming out tomorrow for it, one of which is a one shot separate story. ^^
I can't wait!
The last chapter and this one are confusing me....I can't keep track of whether or not any of them are ponies....
After that thing with the crystal, I know it said that Twilight was a pony again, and I'm pretty sure it said that Jo became one too. Twilight made a point of using her magic as well. But later that chapter Jo is using her hands for things, they're all talking about how magic doesn't exist, and Twilight is sitting in her chair like a human. And now in this one she has hands again.
I honestly have no idea what's going on........
Small error I spotted:
> her expression had soften while writing
"had softened"
I sincerely hope Twilight someday sees the first episode of Star Trek: the Next Generation.
3055032 the thing about her being a pony again was a dream.
....
Humans. More fragile then other animals.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Oh science that is so hilariously misinformed.
We take it for granted to the point we don't notice, and compare ourselves to looney tunes and superman, so yeah, to those impossible fantasies we come up short, but to reality?
We are some of the toughest fucking things on this planet. If you scale for size anyway.
Break a horses leg? Welp. That horse is basically done unless it gets a LOT of veterinary assistance.
A horse LOSES a leg? They die of shock, long before infection or blood loss becomes a problem.
Most other animals are like that, they just can't deal with serious damage.
We on the other hand...
If the luck holds out we can survive being impaled on a spear and having two limbs cleaved off, and with as little as stopping the blood flow or just cauterizing it, (which not much would survive by itself), we'll probably be fine so long as no one rubs shit in it.
There are numerous confirmed incidents of soldiers getting shot, then charging the guns, running through the gun fire, and killing the people shooting them. And even some of them survive.
Remember in 300 where that spartan got stabbed with a spear and just pulled himself down the length of it and cut off the guys head? That was actually a thing that happened sometimes.
Most animals... You shoot them and they fall over dead, they die of shock from the sudden severe injury, they only survive to bleed to death or get shot again if it was a glancing shot, or if their just really lucky they'll last to bleed to death.
Only 20% of humans who get shot, as in, the bullet hits, die from it.
In the scientific community it's generally excepted that the human body is fucking amazing at taking a beating compared to just about everything else that's not single celled.
Nice chapter on this. Wonder if she could use the crystals to send her messages? That'd be interesting.^_^ Well, on to the next chapter.^^
I don't think the world revolves around it's axis at 30,000 kph.
3394629
Hm? Of course not, but it does revolve around the sun at roughly that speed. Now, If I'm wrong about that as well, I'm just going to point a finger at where ever it was I googled that from. (Was likely a wiki.)
2881092
Earth isn't a sphere, it is an ovule (or what ever a 3-dimensional oval is called.)
Unless it's an error by Twilight herself that was intentional on your part, "The human's advancements" should be "The humans' advancements".
3486570
In case nobody told you yet (darn this comment system's limited ability to link to replies), the term you're looking for is oblate spheroid.