Friendship is Card Games: Bookworm Storyline · 12:50pm Nov 27th, 2016
This week, we have an untitled exploration of metafiction. Seriously, even the FiM wiki doesn’t have a title for these issues, so a placeholder it is. Maybe the bookworm ate it. Appropriate for Thanksgiving weekend. Let’s dig in to the rest before the antagonist does.
It’s kind of funny to look at these cocoons in the wake of the Season 6 finale. I don’t think any sherbet fairy moose will come out of these.
Huh. Sugarplum. I suppose Applejack saves that one for when it’s really serious.
I’m with Twilight on this one. This is a tragedy. It’s not a library anymore; it’s a morgue.
Sadly, while the comic beat the card game to the Voracious Reader pun, my schedule kept me from exploiting it.
Also, Pinkie canonically throws coming out parties. Good to know.
They can’t be weeds, AJ. Most of them aren’t even green. They’re clearly some form of fungus. 
On the one hand, Twilight could probably just collapse her telekinetic field and crush the bookworm like a bug (as opposed to a moth or beetle larva.) On the other hand, that would mean destroying a book, clearly a cost too heavy to pay. Still, the fact that she can’t grab something already wrapped in her magic feels pretty ridiculous.
Nice, a concrete time point. This takes place after “Power Ponies.” Also, interesting to note the use of what appears to be Haycarte’s Method long before “Amending Fences.”
Ooh, visible hooves and fetlocks. I like this style. I also love the partially eaten panels.
Chasing an elusive nuisance through fantasies. Shades of “Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep?” here.
You know, it would’ve been nice to see Twilight’s magic malfunction before she explained how it wasn’t working in the damaged story. Or does she mean that her power is somehow tied to the state of her library? Pretty sure the fight with Tirek disproved that.
To be fair, Robin Hood would be pretty amazing with Rapunzel, sai, and balloon fish. I’m sure Discord approves. Also, very interesting way to repair the books.
So… did the pod watchers dip into Pinkie’s schmarfelpod emergency stashes to get that safety equipment or what?
I’ll be honest, I only realized the angry natives were hamsters after Daring Do identified them as such. I had to go back and look.
Also, this story apparently takes place between “Power Ponies” and “Daring Don’t” if Applejack doesn’t know who Ahuizotl is. You helped thwart one of his evil plans, Tree Kicker.
Also also, imagine if A. K. Yearling were in town when this was going on. Awkward.
Huh. I wonder what Daring sees in Fluttershy. Especially if she seems more intriguing than the baby dragon.
Heh. I do love seeing Snarkie Pie peek through from time to time.
Uh, no, Mr. Bookworm, I can’t say you ever did warn them. I suppose you may have been playing nice by your standards, but this is the first time you’ve ever communicated with your pursuers.
The ponies are talking about taking a bath and getting eaten, but I’m not seeing any bubbling cauldrons.
This comic is asking me to believe that Rainbow Dash doesn’t know every Daring Do story inside and out. Really straining my suspension of disbelief here.
Oh. I guess boiling water is going to fill the pit or something? I’m confused.
… Yeah, I’m really not sure how to interpret the mechanisms here.
Dang it, Rarity, what happened to no spoilers?
The ponies retell the stories, you dingus. You fix a blank page by writing more on it.
Also, Pinkie canonically wants a magic tongue. A more magical tongue, anyway.
Holy crap, Pinkie’s hoof. She has a nasty habit of getting painlessly mutilated, doesn’t she? Losing her muzzle in “Magic Duel,” collapsing into Flash puppet components in “The One Where Pinkie Pie Knows,” even getting her cutie mark removed, though that seemed like it hurt a lot.
Ponies have a canonical belief in the afterlife. Granted, this was strongly implied by the Reverend Mr. Waddle performing a funeral in “Hearts and Hooves Day,” but it’s still good to know.
This conflict within the anti-bookworm team doesn’t feel earned. Yes, I can see some butting heads, but this escalates far too quickly to feel organic. Twilight’s doomsaying… eh, I can take it or leave it. At the very least, I feel like she should try to escape, though she may be falling victim to that “damaged story means no magic” rule that no one explained very well.
By contrast, Pinkie’s love for her prosthetic hoof also feels off, but it’s amusingly off. She may just be trying to distract herself from being partially erased from existence.
Oh. That is a balrog. It can hide behind word balloons all it wants, that is indubitably a balrog. Also a bunch of other references. And here I thought I might not have enough material…
Well, that conflict lasted for all of three pages. Still, good to see Pinkie being the one who starts the reconciliation.
It’s more than a little bizarre to have a Lord of the Rings reference while Gandalf and the balrog have their standoff in the middle of Ponyville. Still, I’m always happy to see more Pinkbeard the Wizard.
And remember, Rainbow Strider, one does not simply fly into Wormdor.
Yeah, Twilight doesn’t exactly have the best imagination among the Mane Six, and Rarity’s is poorly suited for zombie combat.
Rainbow Dash does make for an excellent Kirk. I’m sure Zephyr Breeze would volunteer to be one of the exotic green people she seduces over the course of her five-year mission.
Spike clearly has some strong opinions about Daenerys’s brood. I’m just not sure if he feels inadequate or worried that they’re giving dragons a bad name.
Also, the pony world has A Song of Ice and Fire. This raises a lot of uncomfortable questions.
I find it hard to picture Voldemort being subservient to anyone, even Maleficent.
… Wow. This crossover is getting weird.
Apple Bloom knows a little Yiddish. I’m really not sure what to make of that.
The Elements are in the tree. You can’t reference one Season 4 episode and ignore the rest of them. Certainly not if the referenced episode must take place after the premiere. Also, dang it, Sweetie.
I would definitely read a full version of “Dial S For Sassy.”
The metamorphosed bookworm looks pretty cool, even if it does have all of its larval limbs and the color scheme’s a bit much.
Can I bold an emoticon? I feel like I need to bold The bookworm was trying to drown and eat the ponies earlier. It does not get to claim that it never wanted to hurt anyone. The resolution largely works—Twilight’s at her best when befriending her foes—but I demand internal consistency.
Heh. More shades of the Season 6 finale. Redemption comes with a new color palette.
Also, I swear, this writer saw exactly one episode of Season 4 before writing this.
Aside from the contradiction, this actually makes a nice little arc for Twilight as she learns to move beyond the narrative paths carved out by others and to forge her own. In all, this is mostly harmless. For a story about stories, it’s rather light on actual plot, mostly serving as an excuse for visual spectacle. A fun bit of fluff, but one that’s problematic when it comes to fitting it in with any other pony material.
And as a final thought, what happened to all of the nonfiction? Or was there some offscreen portion of the library left completely intact?
In any case, time to fill the shelves with some of my creations:
Entangling Locks 1W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has “W, T: Tap target creature.”
All those hours of conditioning finally paid off.
Wielder of the Sacred Fire 2WW
Creature — Unicorn Wizard
Protection from black
1W, T, Sacrifice Wielder of the Sacred Fire: Destroy target Demon.
”You shall not pass.”
3/3
Winter Queen 3WW
Snow Creature — Pony Wizard
2S: Detain target creature an opponent controls. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery. (Until your next turn, that creature can’t attack or block and its activated abilities can’t be activated. S can be paid with one mana from a snow source.)
3/3
Gum Up the Works 1U
Instant
Choose one —
• Counter target instant or sorcery spell.
• Tap target nonland permanent. It doesn’t untap during its controller’s next untap step.
A creative mind needs little else to achieve its goals.
Fictionalize 3UU
Sorcery
Choose target permanent. Its owner shuffles it into his or her library.
”It’s always important to keep reality and fantasy distinct, especially in my line of work.”
—A. K. Yearling, novelist
Twisted Retelling 3UU
Instant
You may cast target instant or sorcery card from a graveyard without paying its mana cost. If a card cast this way would be put into a graveyard this turn, exile it instead.
No two readers experience the same story.
Soulsplinter Lich BBB
Creature — Unicorn Zombie Wizard
Soulsplinter Lich has indestructible as long as you control an artifact.
”Those who create only a single phylactery deserve their finite existences.”
3/4
Baker’s Friend 2B
Creature — Pony Citizen
Lifelink
Whenever another creature dies, you may gain 2 life.
”Just a little off the top, friend?”
2/1
Malicious Regent 2BB
Creature — Pegasus Wizard
Flying
B, T, Pay 1 life: Draw a card.
3BB: Transform Malicious Regent. Activate this ability only if your life total is less than half your starting life total.
2/2
Maleficent Dragon
(B) Creature — Dragon
Flying
B, Discard a card: Maleficent Dragon gets +1/+1 and gains lifelink until end of turn.
Her form finally matches her greed.
4/4
Permafrost Shamblers 3B
Snow Creature — Pony Zombie
S: Permafrost Shamblers gains menace until end of turn.
The ice preserves the corpses as they wait for more bodies to add to their ranks.
4/2
Lord of the Shadow 4BB
Creature — Demon
Flying, trample
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice a creature.
When Lord of the Shadow dies, each opponent sacrifices a creature.
It stokes its dark fire with other souls, preparing for the day it will burn out of control.
5/5
Ravening Void 4BB
Enchantment
Devoid (This card has no color.)
At the beginning of each player’s upkeep, that player exiles a permanent he or she controls.
The blank expanse sucks at the mind, spirit, and body until all are just as empty.
Action Hero RR
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Action Hero attacks each turn if able.
Heroic — Whenever Action Hero becomes the target of a spell you control, it gains double strike until end of turn.
”What are you waiting for?”
2/1
Mother of Dragons 4RR
Creature — Unicorn Shaman
When Mother of Dragons enters the battlefield, create three 1/1 red Dragon creature tokens with flying and haste.
R: Target Dragon gets +1/+0 until end of turn.
”My children prefer their meals well-cooked.”
2/2
Hamsters of Pygolia 3G
Creature — Beast Warrior
Hexproof
Melee (Whenever this creature attacks, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each opponent you attacked with a creature this combat.)
Without magic, hooves rarely beat paws.
2/2
Raised by Apes 4GG
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
When Raised by Apes enters the battlefield, create a 3/3 green Ape creature token.
Enchanted creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.
Enchanted creature gets +3/+3 as long as you control an Ape.
Universal Rainboom 5
Legendary Artifact — Vehicle
Flying
Whenever one or more creatures crew Universal Rainboom, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each color among those creatures.
Crew 4 (Tap any number of creatures you control with total power 4 or more: This Vehicle becomes an artifact creature until end of turn.)
4/4
Narrative Schmarfelpod 6
Artifact Creature — Construct
Imprint — When Narrative Schmarfelpod enters the battlefield, you may choose a card you own from outside the game and exile it face down.
When Narrative Schmarfelpod dies, turn the exiled card face up. If it’s a creature card, put it onto the battlefield under your control.
0/5
Consume Reality XX1
Sorcery
Target player exiles X permanents he or she controls.
Grand vistas, wondrous devices, hopes and dreams… all fit down a gullet eventually.
Ravenous Bookworm UB
Creature — Worm
Skulk (This creature can’t be blocked by creatures with greater power.)
Whenever Ravenous Bookworm deals combat damage to a player, exile that many cards from the top of that player’s library, then put a +1/+1 counter on Ravenous Bookworm.
1/1
Mental Collapse (ur)B
Instant
As an additional cost to cast Mental Collapse, exile the top six cards of your library.
Destroy target creature.
”An alicorn’s insanity rarely ends well for anything nearby.”
—Princess Luna
Rainbow Revival 1WB
Sorcery
Return target multicolored permanent card from your graveyard to the battlefield.
”Rainbows can do anything. I should know.”
—Rainbow Dash, Bearer of Loyalty
Mesmeric Python 1GU
Creature — Snake
Whenever Mesmeric Python deals combat damage to a creature, tap that creature. It doesn’t untap during its controller’s untap step for as long as you control Mesmeric Python.
It only needs to constrict the blind.
1/4
As much as I agree with this, the plural of sai is sai.
Sounds like fun cardwise and comicwise n_n
Great job this week, though I must wonder if you had to contain yourself with the plethora of crossover material this time.
Still, you made each card with love for its source material referenced and the mechanics matched.
It really is a sight to behold all of the new and old keyword abilities mingleling with each other. Innistrad is just too LOVEly to leave out from each installment, eh?
Well, Shy was a fashion model. She's "got it going on" as they say.
Got a typo there. Also, maybe she's only read this one TWICE and don't know EVERYTHING about it yet.
Non-fiction gives this bookworm indigestion, so it didn't eat any.
As I haven't read the comic so it took me a moment to figure out that Entangling Locks was referencing hair instead of, you know, a door lock.
The flavor text on Baker’s Friend makes me think of a barber. I'm not sure I get the flavor on this one,
Why is it "Lord of the Shadow"? So pretentious, spelling its title with a "the" and all.
On Raised by Apes: Again I say, we really need a keyword for the "Enchanted creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach." ability.
Did you mean for Consume Reality not the have any colored mana in its casting cost? If so I think that "1" (generic) should be a "C" (one colorless) instead to restrict it slightly. Even at "double-x and one of any" it's very strong, making it "any color for double-x and one colorless" means they have to have a source of colorless, which normal decks don't tend to have most of the time.
Plus it further ties it in with the Eldrazi, without having to make it Tribal as well. Which I wouldn't mind if it was Tribal... . Tribal needs more love.
I like the flavor text on Rainbow Revival.
Wow. I forgot a lot of this arc, but Daenerys was probably the biggest surprise for me. I didn't start reading ASoIaF or watching Game of Thrones until some time after I first read this comic, so going back now and seeing her there after I completely overlooked her the first time was weird.
Still, ponies have ASoIaF. Good to know.
Twilight Sparkle reading the Red Wedding.
4319237
One notable reference I had to drop was Loki. There really wasn't any way to present him as anything but a legendary creature. I actually had a discussion with my sister over whether he should be a Giant, a God, or a Shapeshifter. However, almost all of my knowledge is in relation to the actual Norse mythology, not whatever Marvel did to him. Plus, I couldn't settle on whether I wanted to go with "Thor's quest buddy" Loki, "Baldr's murderer" Loki, or "seductive horse" Loki. Appropriately enough for a shapeshifter, he has many faces over the course of the sagas.
4319391
Imagine the Dothraki. Do they ride apes?
4319355
Adventure does seem to attract a few attractive woman that the protagonist can rescue.
Baker's Friend: This, much like the razor-wielding stallion leering out of a pie shop, is a reference to Sweeny Todd, the demon barber of Fleet Street.
Lord of the Shadow: The "the" is there for two reasons: references to the Lord of the Pit and to Gandalf's cry of "Go back to the shadow!"
Consume Reality: Scour from Existence makes its Eldrazi ties quite clear without colorless mana symbols.
Sorry for my own delays in getting back to your other comments.
4319538
Speaking of, I can't tell you how shocked I am that nobody ever thought to write an HiE fic about a Dothraki. Not that I necessarily want one, but it's just so obvious that I can't believe it doesn't already exist.
4319538
I thought of Sweeny Todd when I read the flavor text but I kinda forgot about the "pork pies" part of it.
As for Consume Reality being compared to Scour there is a problem with your logic: Scour was printed before they did the colorless mana symbol, by one set. Look at the image for Ally Encampment, also from Battle for Zendikar, it has the old "1 generic" on it still. The rules text has been errataed of course, but the colorless mana symbol didn't see use until the next set, Oath of the Gatewatch.
Had they had it for Battle I think Scour, Titan's Presence and Gruesome Slaughter would of all had some amount of "colorless only" to them, probally one less generic and one colorless, much like Spatial Contortion and Warping Wail from Oath have.
The three cards that are colorless non-permanents from Rise of the Eldrazia are all "Tribal-Eldrazi", and I wish they had kept using Tribal for the others as well but I understand why they don't like using Tribal, but I think if they had access to the colorless mana symbol at the time they would not have been Tribal at all and done the same as the card from Oath.
Also, "seductive horse" Loki is best Loki of course.
I rather enjoyed those comics. I always love a good style parody.