Celestia and Luna announce their retirement and their plans to turn the throne and power over Equestria to the mane 6. Unfortunately, this is the last straw for Twilight, and she goes off on a rant about why this isn't a good idea.

Apple Bloom was starting to get suspicious. No pictures of her with her parents, no stories about it, no flashbacks where she appeared together with them. So she took matters into her own hooves, and had some tests done in secret, with Twilight's help, to determine her actual relation with her supposed family.

The results were... certainly unexpected. Interesting, to say the least. Absolutely devoid of any logical sense, more appropriately.

Knit Wit is a kind pony who admires the Princesses.

Knit Wit is also an idiot.

He asks Celestia to extinguish the sun.

Madness follows...

Contains: Upset Celestia, brainless ponies, desired use of alcohol, time stopping, and face hoofing.

Featured 3-15-19 to 3-19-19!

UPDATE: I brought back the original beginning. I honestly hated the one I’ve been using for the last 3 months. I like the current one a lot more.

In the magical land of Equestria, there are no ponies.
In the sleepy town of Ponyville, there are no ponies.
In the glittering Castle of Friendship, there are no ponies.

So who are all these colorful quadrupeds?

It's the middle of the night. Maybe. Since Sunset Shimmer uses light-blocking curtains and has no bedside clock, it could be noon for all she cares. Still, the buzzing of her transdimensional diary wakes her up. It's Twilight Sparkle, panicking about venturing outside her comfort zone. Sunset does her best to calm her friend down.

Twilight, visiting her human of choice, makes a suggestion for what they should do that particular evening. It's not unreasonable, but it is unexpected.

Still, worse things have happened.

Applejack's tour of duty didn't work out like she expected; maybe if she'd been able to keep her dang mouth shut... oh, well. She hadn't decided if she really wanted to make a career out of the military, but her superiors made it pretty doggone clear they didn't care for the idea, so that was that. But everytime Harmony closes a door, it opens a window. And maybe she's been sent exactly where she's always needed to be.

However cat-infested it was at the moment.

Twilight - with one thing leading to another - has rather talked herself into a corner with her Canterlot friends, and now requires Anon's help in straightening it out maybe.

It's all very awkward, if she's being honest, but he's a happy-go-lucky-chap and what's the worst that can happen, really?

Starlight is out for a walk, and while out for a walk comes across the local human, who had recently gone missing. He's picked up at least one bad habit.

Smolder has a nightmare.

What confuses her is that it's of something she didn't think she was actually afraid of.

Featured 3/8/2019