Even in the golden heart of Canterlot, ponies are not safe from crime. From petty theft to vicious murder, somepony has to keep the streets safe. Somepony has to pick up the pieces. Somepony has to find the criminals before they strike.
Luckily, they don't do a brilliant job - or I'd be out of work.
So, hello there - the name's Nocturne - investigator of obscure crime, back-alley stabbings, and part-time foal-sitter. Currently working for the least successful private detective agency in the whole of Canterlot.
Oh - and the prime suspect in a high profile murder.
That last bit might be the most important, actually...
Edit completed 29/8/15
Chapters (11)
This is pretty good. But why is Lulu only half batpony? The Cakes, both earth ponies, gave birth to a pure pegasus and a pure unicorn.
4197648 I have the vague idea that her father was some kind of pony (not bat) - which would make her a half batpony.
I try not the think about where Fantasia's been
Intriguing... I'll put this on my Read Later list, but it's certainly a lot more promising than most stories I've seen submitted lately.
Good stuff.
4202763
Thanks!
this was really good from start to finish and I really loved the reveal
6409424 Wow! Thank you! I'd never really had much experience with writing detective stories, so I wasn't really sure how well it would read
6410492 well you did a great job, I have read tons of mystery novels and I must say the best ones keep you guessing until the very end, it is no fun if you can figure everything out by the third chapter. and this definitely kept me guessing a bit, at the beginning there was an idea of who did it, then that idea changes and changes again, and not in a confusing way either. and my favorite part had to have been the Sherlock Holmes style reveal. gathering all the relevant parties and then telling them exactly what roll they played in the crime
6411910 Thanks! I've found it really hard to get feedback, so it's great to hear it! Thanks for the watch as well!
Huh, I thought it was the son but I was partially wrong on some of the reasoning. I figured the father was going to disown him for incest. I thought the pendant was a hint that Feather's father was actually the dead guy, especially since I don't remember anyone ever mentioning who her father was. Although, I didn't realize the murder actually occurred in the kitchen. Good story. I liked it.
6464103 Thanks! Sometimes, while writing it I would end up thinking of a more interesting reason/culprit for the crime - but having already planned and put certain clues in, you're slightly stuck.
Thanks for the favourite as well!