A small, brown colt with a beanie atop his head trotted down the dirt road, away from the Ponyville schoolhouse, his saddlebags containing his notebook and homework.
Button Mash continued walking through the main throrough-fare of Ponyville, towards an ordinary brick building. The colt went inside and put his saddlebags on the kitchen table, took a glass from the cupboard and went to the sink to fill it with water. He drained the glass of its contents and put it in the sink, he picked up his saddlebags as he went up the stairs and into his room.
"I'm home, mom!" the colt called, whipping out his books.
"How was your day at school?" his mother asked.
"Same as any other day" the colt responded.
"Is that so?"
"Uh-huh"
"How was Sweetie Belle?" his mother smirked.
"Moooooooommm" the colt groaned "I said I don't like her"
"I'm just messing with you" she smiled, ruffling his mane "I've got to go out for a few hours, will you be alright here by yourself?"
"Yes mom" the colt replied.
"Be sure to finish your homework"
"Yes mom" the colt said, rolling his eyes.
His mother trotted down the stairs and out of the house, locking the door behind her.
Button Mash sat down at the small table in his room and began reading.
'The reign of Discord lasted for years, until finally, the Royal Pony Sisters were able to stop him with the Elements of Harmony. It's a mystery to this day where the Elements came from, as they were-'
He didn't get much farther than that, before his little snout hit the book, his brain out like a light.
X X X (Several hours later) X X X
Button Mash was snapped out of his sleep as he heard one of the trash cans outside being knocked over. He rubbed the sand out of his eyes and and jumped to the floor, he trotted downstairs and peeked out the window. Seeing nothing in the alley, he shrugged and prepared to return to his room.
*Knock* *Knock*
He thought he was imagining things, and shook his head. He set one hoof on the stairs when another knock came, slightly louder this time.
*Knock*
Button eyed the door in confusion.
*Knock*
He slowly approached the door and carefully opened it, he almost instantly regretted it and slammed the door as hard as possible, his heart beating a mile a minute. He peeked out the window and saw it, still laying on its side in the alley. The stallion's coat (he assumed it was a stallion) was completely black, he had no mane or tail, and his pupils were pure white, what were supposed to be the whites of his eyes were colored a vibrant purple. The stallion's breathing was heavy, and the long gashes running down his long legs gave Button the impression he needed help. He opened the door a little faster this time, and those piercing eyes stared right back at him, Button gulped and prayed he was making the right decision. He took one ear into his mouth and tugged, he saw the stallion wince as he ever-so-slowly managed to drag the stallion into the kitchen. Button closed the door and flopped onto the floor, exhausted. He looked to the stallion, who was still breathing heavily, his breaths slowly becoming more relaxed. Button took the opportunity for his strength to return and walked up to the stallion's muzzle, those white-and-purple eyes stared back at him as he continued the staring contest.
The stallion's eyes finally closed and slowly reopened, he looked tired, like he hadn't slept in days.
"Thank...you..." he rasped.
The stallion's eyes closed again, and he remained silent, at first Button had thought the pony died, but heard him breathing softly and found nothing else wrong with him.
Button found himself confused at the stallion's behavior, and trotted up the stairs to fetch his homework and the bandages. It was going to be a long night...
X X X X X X X
Button closed his notebook just as his mother walked into the house.
She stopped as she saw the tall stallion laying on the kitchen floor, sleeping like a rock.
"Button sweetie, why is there a pony asleep in our kitchen?"
Ha! I got a laugh out of the last line.![:rainbowlaugh:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/rainbowlaugh.png)
4082468 Thank you, glad you enjoyed it. I thought that would be the sort of thing Button's mom would say![:rainbowlaugh:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/rainbowlaugh.png)
Observations: Ch1
Unnecessary break mid sentence in the middle of a paragraph. Very strange.
Another unnecessary break. Not a good sign.
possesses has 5 "s"s.
WTF is this?
Not sure what to make of this chapter.
Observations: Ch2
Most people proclaim that they are home before going to their room. Button must be a rebel.
Sweetie Mash
Button should have a perfectly clear view of Endarpony's junk. No need to assume anything.
Another break.
Most foals would freakout at the sight of Endarpony, slam the door shut, lock the door, and hide under the bed. Button must not be afraid of monsters.
What? Sleeping outside on the ground not an option?
Button's mom needs to give Button the lesson on not talking to strangers or letting them into your home.
I guess the next chapter will be
Love TapButton's mom taking the Endarpony to the hospital to have his wounds treated and report him to the authorities. Things about to get interesting.4082945 You can blame the formatting for the unecessary line breaks, as for the spelling mistakes, I'll go back and fix those. Thanks for you interest!
4082945 The "X"s are a time pass![:rainbowwild:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/rainbowwild.png)
"Same as any other day" the colt responded.
other day,"
------------------------
"Uh-huh"
"Uh-huh."
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"Moooooooommm" the colt groaned "I said I don't like her"
"Moooooooommm,"
"I said I don't like her." or "I said I don't like her!"
Need to add punctuation for dialog.
http://fictionwriting.about.com/od/writingexercises/qt/punctuation.htm
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"I'm just messing with you"
"I'm just messing with you,"
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"Yes mom" the colt replied.
"Be sure to finish your homework"
"Yes mom" the colt replied again.
"Yes mom," the colt replied.
"Be sure to finish your homework,"
"Yes mom," the colt replied again.
Need to add punctuation for dialog.
Since Button mash replied twice, he might be a bit annoyed the second time.
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He didn't get much farther than that as his little snout hit the book, out cold.
Little snout is the last subject so readers could think that his snout was out cold and not Button Mash. Need to clarify this a bit.
You might want to use further instead.
http://www.dailywritingtips.com/farther-vs-further/
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Button took the opporitunity
opportunity
If you have problems spelling a word, just throw it into google and you usually will get the correct spelling.
Can also look it up in a dictionary too.
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Cool read.
Oh sweet Celestia, another story that needs help.
You're going too fast, show, don't tell. Instead of telling
Try showing
See the difference?
Wait, this is an HiE? Wow. Spoiler alert, dude! I was just reading to see what Button does about a creature from minecraft showing up at his house. I had no idea he'd be a human...
Well, onto the next chapter!
could be longer.
Strangely calm reaction from her. Then again, maybe she saw this one coming. (Or she has LSD somewhere...
)