“No!”
“Come on Stan, please?”
“No.”
“Pretty please?”
“No..”
“Pretty please with love on top?”
Stan stopped walking and smacked his friend across the face. “First off Carl, I ain’t that kind of bug, and second, I’m not taking part in whatever customs they do.”
Carl rubbed his face and pouted at his friend. “Stan, it’s not a ‘custom’. It’s a great experience that you should...experience.”
“I’m not ‘experiencing’ anything that a pony does.”
“But it’s fun, I’ve done it plenty of times.”
Stan rolled his eyes and continued walking along the streets of Canterlot. “Well, I’m glad you adjusted to live like them Carl, but me, I want to live my own life without subjecting myself to whatever it is those ponies do.”
Carl wasn’t surprised to hear Stan say that. He knew Stan didn’t really like their kind that much, but ever since the treaty, the other changelings had to adjust to this life or else they would have to leave, but others were having a tougher time than Stan when it came to adjusting. The ponies were the same.
“Alright, fine. I just wanted to show you something that both of us could enjoy. You know,” Carl leaned in on Stan. “as friends.”
Stan pushed him. “I have other friends Carl, the only reason why I’m with you is because the others are at Lift’s and Shift’s party.”
Carl stopped walking. “Wait? Party? Since when? Why wasn’t I invited?”
“Since the treaty...duh, and you weren't invited because it was for cave dwellers only.” Stan was starting to think going to that wasn’t a bad idea, even though Lift and Shift were probably the most annoying-
“Why didn’t you tell me?! Or better yet, bring me with you. Those guys are the coolest changelings around.”
“There not ‘cool’ Carl, the only reason they get so much attention is because of the three D’s, their DJ music, their Dance moves, and their Disorder.”
“Oh no, Stan.” Carl objected. “They are cool, their eyes look so awesome when they play.”
“That's because of their Disorder Carl.” Stan said in anger.
“But it’s so cool when Shift talks all robot-ie and stuff, his eyes get all wavy, and Lift has those bar things that go up and down...speaking of bar Stan, how about we-”
Stan then grabbed Carl and pulled him behind a dumpster in a nearby alley, holding a hoof across his face and peeking around the corner.
“Mhh hhmm mh,” Carl spit his hoof out and looked at him. “bleh..Stan..what the-”
“Shush!” Stan yelled. “You want to be seen?”
Carl rolled his blue eyes and leaned around the corner. “Seen by who h-h-who…oh madre de reina...it’s...Talantilo...”
Carl and Stan stood motionless as a beast they knew all too well slowly walked past them. It’s bright yellow eyes shined in the night, and it’s teeth were as sharp as ever, but what made both of them worried (mostly Carl) was what he was carrying on his back. A pony.
Carl looked at Stan. “We have to save her.”
Stan dropped his jaw. “Are you crazy? What would we do, make him eat one of us while the other saves that pony? Sorry, but I ain’t risking my life to save that mare.”
“But look at her Stan.” Carl grabbed his Stan’s face and turned him to what the monster had on it’s back. It was a yellow mare with pink hair. “She’s one of the elements.”
“So?”
"'SO!?’ Stan, are we just gonna let an important pony get eaten by that thing?”
Stan looked down and shook his head. “Even if we get a hold of her, it’s already too late, the beast probably has the girl in his mesmer-eyes. She would run away from us and become his dinner; sorry Carl, but she’s a goner.”
Carl opened his mouth to try to object, but he knew Stan was right, once you looked into that beast’s eyes, he would put you in a trance that would make you think it would be better to stay with him instead of running away. He looked back at the predator and prey and saw that they were smiling at each other.
“So, where are you taking me again?” The yellow one said in a loving voice.
Discortalantilo chuckled. “You’ll find out soon enough Shy.”
Carl and Stan couldn’t take their eyes off of them. “It’s like forced stockholm's.” Carl said, “creepy...”
Both of them couldn’t stop shaking from the sight of that creature. They waited until it was out of eyesight before they walked out into the open. “L-lets just...go home Carl.”
“Home?” Carl walked out of the ally and pointed down the street. “We’re going to the bar Stan.”
“Bar?” Stan eyed him suspiciously. “How can we get into something made of chocolate, Carl?”
Carl face-hoofed. “Not a chocolate bar Stan, I mean a bar bar, one that sells that alcohol stuff.”
Stan continued to look confused. “What’s alcohol?”
Carl snickered. “You don’t know what alcohol is?”
“What, is that like the name of the bar or something?”
“Pfff, you’re kidding me right now.”
“I don’t know what it is Carl, just tell me.”
Carl wrapped an arm around him and smiled. “How about I teach you the ways of getting wasted.”
“So now you want to kill me?” Stan said sarcastically.
“Not that kind of wasted, I mean drunk.”
“I don’t play basketball Carl, I play football.”
Carl just rolled his eyes. “Just follow me Stan.”
Stan pushed out of his grip and stood his ground. “I already told you I’m not going to...whatever it is you’re taking me to.”
Carl pointed behind him. “Home’s that way Stan, are you sure you want to go that way with the beast on your tail?”
Stan groaned, knowing full well that that beast can spot creatures from miles away, so even if he flew, he wouldn’t stand a chance. “Fine!” Stan yelled. “Let’s go take part in this stupid pony ritual you like so much.” Stan shoved him aside and continued walking forward.
Carl walked by his side. “It’s not a ritual, it’s a….habit, I think that’s the right word.”
“Whatever. Just take...me…to….oh great” Stan was starting to look to his left. Carl did the same.
“Wow...Still…” Both of them walked up to the wall and looked at the row of posters in disgust, most of them were filled with segregation against changelings, while others were talking about the treaty between the changelings and the ponies, which were covered up by posters saying…
“Let the real ones live…”
“Only you can protect espionage.”
“Swat the flies, now that one’s my favorite.”
Stan smacked Carl. “See, Its stuff like this that I hate about them Carl, you try to do good, and others still think of you as some...some…”
“Monster.” Carl rubbed his head. “I’m sure it will die down.”
“Not if we die first.” Stan continued looking at the rows and rows of hate toward their kind, but one poster in particular was getting to him.
“Welp, come on Stan, Beer will not drink itself.” Carl walked away while Stan continued staring at one of the posters. His eyes could stop looking at the beauty on it, how the art of it practically showed every aspect as to what he loved about that wonderful…
“STAN!”
He shook his head and looked away from the pictures to see that Carl was waiting for him.
“J-just a second.” He took one more look, then started walking. “Like you even have a chance with her Stan…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Get out…”
Stan crossed his hooves and looked at Carl. “You heard him, look’s like we can’t get dunked here.”
Carl glared at Stan. “Its called getting drunk, and you sir cannot deny us a drink!”
“Yes I can.” The unicorn pony leaned his head toward the sign behind his counter. Which in big bold letters it read…
“‘We have the right to deny service to backstabbing, shape shifting, love sucking, blue eyed, white fanged, lying, cheating, downright ugly bugs (Also known as changelings) that enter this establishment under Equestrian law.’” Carl hung his mouth open while Stan looked away from the sign and back at the bartender. “Surprised you didn’t run out of room.”
“It’s the law, you bug.” The bartender leaned in on Stan. “You may be allowed to stay here and have homes, but ponies like us have the right to not serve your kind here.”
Carl looked away from the plaque and leaned up to the pony. “B-but I came here lots of time’s Mike Light, you can’t just-”
Mike Light pushed both changelings away from him. “I should of known somepony like you, no..some monster like you would lie to me for months just to get to know me so you could kill me.” He sneered. “You make me sick you heartless-”
Carl put his hooves on the table and leaned in. “I didn’t try to- ugh…will you just give us one drink Mikey...please.”
Mike Light grabbed Carl by the throat. “Don’t call me that anymore you insect.”
Other pony patrons around the bar were starting to look away from their drinks, or the radio, or their conversations with each other to look at the scene between the two changelings and the bartender. Two of them especially watched in amusement.
“I suggest you let go of him.” Stan said sternly.
Mike turned to him and chuckled. “And just what are you gonna-”
*CRASH*
Everyone in the bar gasped as Mike Light let go of Carl and fell behind the counter. Stan just sat their and dusted his hooves, “Hope that bottle didn’t cost that much...Mikey.” Stan ended in a mocking tone.
A pony behind him tapped him on the shoulder. “I was drinking that you little…” He said drowsily before falling of the stool.
Carl placed his hooves back on the counter and coughed. “Are you alright, Mikey?” With no answer, Carl turned to his friend. “What did you do that for Stan?”
“He was choking you Carl.” Stan said blankly. “And I’m not gonna let some groundwalking magician try to hurt one of us.”
“But you didn’t have to kill him!”
“I ain’t dead…” Stan and Carl looked back at the counter to see Mike get back on his feet, holding a rag on his head that was soaking in blood. “I wish I could say the same for your friend here.” He stumbled over to the counter and stared daggers into Stan. “I’ll give you three seconds to get out.”
Stan smiled and placed his elbow on the table “Or what?”
Carl tapped his friends shoulder. “Uh...Stan. I-I think we should go...”
“One…”
Carl was now tugging on his friend, yet he continued to smile at Mike Light. “Come on Stan, let’s just forget about this and...ya know...go home.”
“Two…”
Ponies in the bar were starting to get up, others continued drinking and tried to contain their shocked faces, while a pair of stallions, both in trench coats and one wearing a fedora, started walking toward the changelings.
“Stan, come on! You didn't want to do this anyway, and Mike is a pony you don't want to get on your bad side, like this one time when I was drunk he-”
Stan looked at Carl and shoved him aside. “Oh please Carl, what's this pony gonna do?” He turned around and faced the flaring end of a horn in his face. Stan then flopped his ear stems and looked past it to see Mike Light charging it with a smile.
“Three…”
Hah, nice.
,...... oh lord if Cloudkicker from winning pony ever learned anything, never, ever hit on a regal sister when drunk.
I TOTALLY WHANNA GET BIZZED!!!
Also, take a like and a fav.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
Y did I feel like that you were gonna ship those two.
Should this be sedition?
Fell just a bit short, my friend. The grammar could use a ton of work :/ I think you and I both know that bizzed is not a word, my friend. Stan and Carl are also human names. Laziness at its finest :/
4/10 flyswatters
Ponies with guns? Eeeeeeh...
Celesti...philia....... I was hoping for more on the changeling-pony peace treaty. curious how you are going to solve the food issue (I gotta few theories myself)
You could use a pre-reader or three, plus an editor. Grammar could use some work. Aside from that... This isn't going to end well. XD
Hmmm... this should be interesting. Still to early to cast my "vote" on this one, so I'll wait to see where it goes before I make a decision. Not to sure about the gun though, maybe a knife or a sword would go better based on what they have in the show but that's just my opinion.
4549941
4549642
Yeah...sorry about the whole 'gun thing'
I couldn't really think of anything else for Stan to turn around to.
Makes me wonder how he held it now..........
Edit: no more gun...sometimes you just need a little less gun and more magic horn
4549497
Flyswatters, you my friend gave me an idea.
Thank you!
4550072 Crossbows? Glowing horns?
4550078
...horns
...
...
How could I have been such an idiot to not think of that!
give me a sec to fix that now...
4550095 We all have those moments.
Wait, what the heck was happening to Fluttershy?
4550072 First a bad story and now blatant plagiarism!? I shall see you in court, motherfuckair.
4550328
...kay
And this is why anti-discrimination laws should include public accommodations clauses.
4550665 My friend, there is no stick up my butt :) trust me, I would feel the stick if there was indeed a stick in the first place. Do not worry, my friend I am perfectly healthy ;)
There's a sequel. Oh there's a sequel! THERE'S FRIGGIN' SEQUEL! OH GOD WHY?! And now we wait for the next chapter.
4550665
Thank you for saying those words.
4549497
therooster.com/sites/default/files/userfiles/images/saysomethinginteresting.jpg
1. It's over the internet. how do you plan to take him to court?
2. I doubt anyone would really give damn about taking someone to court over this.
and 3.
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4550923 My friend, i know that I am sexy, but must you stalk me everywhere I go :/ you could atleast offer me dinner and a movie before the stalking starts.
4551074
4551522 We could have been the best of friends, but now we shall become the greatest of enemies :/
4550884
4551522
If I could do it, both of you would get medals. Nice to see people standing up for others.
4551545 Pffffff..
warosu.org/data/vr/img/0004/42/1365892822530.jpg
Are you serious? I happen to read stories in the feature box and I always see you trolling people as usual.
I hate flames...
Just...no more...please
4551592 My friend I gave the story an upvote :/
4551607
well...I thank you...
but please, stop.
Just stop.
I read comments for the laughs, cry's, feels, know-hows, and rants.
Not fighting between others.
4550365
Ignore this one. It's a poor troll.
4549497 Why does every story need 10k words per chapter with book-quality?
It's an original idea and well written and that counts.
4550586
Technically a bar can be (they usually are) privately-owned, which means it's not public property and thus not a public place. So you don't really wanna force it... this is one of those "Changelings aren't that bad!" sorta fics, but if you think about it they fucked up a lot of ponies, physically and mentally. You can't force ponies to accept them literally overnight, or even in one generation. That'd be like if your country was invaded, and after a hard battle you won - then the enemy soldiers who killed your family asked if they could come crash at your house for the night. Chances are you're -probably- going to kill them.
Yes, I know it might not be an exact analogy, but the feeling provoked is close enough. You try to force integration, you'll have a rebellion on your hands. Riots, and rightfully so. It's not discrimination like "Oh I just don't like bug-ponies they're filthy and inferior." it's more "Jesus Christ I can still hear the screams every time I close my eyes. GET IT AWAY FROM ME!" which makes much more sense! Not to mention the idea of someone/an enemy who can be anything and anyone inspires great fear in societal sapient creatures - is that your wife in the next room or an enemy spy? Are those your kids playing happily with their toys or are they adult enemy assassins? Your neighbors of twenty years, waving at you as you walk down to the market - everyone in the market? Is that vendor you're trying to buy from going to slip some knockout drugs into your drink and put you in a cocoon? This is very sensible fear, given the circumstances.
We should be focusing on the ponies who are game enough to try and work past their fears and bad memories to try and reach out, rather than saying something along the lines of how messed up it is that ponies don't suddenly love changelings or that the laws don't suddenly force them all to try. -THAT- would be messed up.
4551695 *'manly' screams* NOT LAW AND S***!! *dives out of window*
4551718
Scatter! "Is it the cops?" WORSE, IT'S THE LAWYERS!
4551760 COMMENCE OPERATION: RUN AWAY WHILE SCREAMING LIKE A LITTLE B****!! I'll go first...
[youtube=UPG4NVk_JEY]
Like I always say: when in doubt, get the fuck out!
4549497
Did you even read Celestiphobia?
And that was just blatantly bad taste on your part.
Its attempted trolls like you that cause the dark side of the internet to gain power.
SHUN THE ATTEMPTED TROLL!
4553841 Granted the insult was likely unrequited given those that the others here have spun for your displeasure. Yet I find using swearing quite an unbecoming means to emphasise a point when it can be done much better by using a wider range of words.
My sincerest apologies if I insulted you, good day.
4553993 This seducer of mothers over here. I keep trying to get out but they keep pulling me back in.
Better?
This will either end in fire, or in muchas smoochas. Either way, you have my attention.
Folks have referred to the potential shipping of Princess Luna and a changeling in my latest story as Moonbuggy. Having seen this, there's only one thing I can say:
LET THE SUNBUGGY BEGIN!!!
4554004
Quite.
Enjoyable internet conversations started with insults... Not exactly the most common find on my part.
Yay it has begun :D
Okay this is gonna get real awkward real quick.
DEATH TO DA CHERNGELERNGS!!!
THEY TOOK OUR JOBS!! HUR DURK A DURRRR!!
sp.yimg.com/ib/th?id=HN.608030205232416100&pid=15.1
4556731 Omg so much yes.
4558351 *Alondro joins the protesters*
Weird, I thought Stan was supposed to get drunk before getting shafted by a horn job.
Waaaait a minute...
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