Chasing Your Own Tail

by devas

Chapter 1

"Hey Sonata, can I join you?"

The blue-skinned girl looked up up at Sunset, narrowing her eyes menacingly. An effect that was only slightly spoiled by the pizza in her mouth and on her face and shirt.

"Why?"

Sunset grimaced slightly.

"Well, I'm actually keeping tabs on you. After what happened at the Battle of the Bands, Adagio and Aria pretty much vanished, but you've kept coming to class. Even if at lunch you go sit outside and eat by yourself. What are you doing?"

Sonata sighed heavily, then she threw the greasy paper the pizza was wrapped in at a wastebasket, missed, and looked forlornly at it.

"I...I don't know."

Sunset crossed her arms and straightened her back a bit.

"What do you mean you don't know? Didn't you have any plan for what you'd do if you didn't manage to steal Equestrian magic?"

"No," said Sonata, "Adagio was in charge of plans. I'm too stupid for that. All I can think of doing is brainwashing people, stealing some magic, and invading the world! But that didn't work, and I don't have my gem anymore, and if I try it again I'll get hurt!" she whined.

Sunset rolled her eyes and sat down next to the other girl.

"Believe it or not, I understand where you're coming from."

"How? What you did was completely different! You tried to brainwash the students here, then cross to Equestria so you could invade the oh right, it's actually a lot like what we tried to do."

Be patient, you were like her too, even if she's dimmer than a light bulb someone tried to set on fire thought Sunset.

"Look, think about it this way: what is it you wanted to do after you'd gotten all that power? Then maybe you can figure out a way to do it without hurting other people."

Sonata's expression was that of a fish who'd just been asked to solve a quadratic equation in class.

"But why would I not want to hurt other people?"

Sunset's self control was one of her virtues. As part of her studies, she'd honed it over the years: she could stay focused for hours, and withstand the greatest of privations without making a peep. She'd even managed to go through a whole session of day court without screaming at the petitioners. Thus, she managed to reply with civility.

"Because otherwise those other people will get angry. And if they get angry, they'll stop you, like we did."

"Oh. But, it's like, a Siren thing? I don't know if I can really explain it. Jeez, 'Dagie would explain it sooo much better, but, like...we're supposed to always be the best? Sirens are supposed to rule over everything, and so we always have to become stronger. 'Dagie used to go on and on about it.
“It's a thing about...chasing something very very hard to get. Like...you know when the sun goes down, and it's dark? We're supposed to go in the direction where it went, until we go beyond the squiggly line between the sky and the sea. And once we reach it, we'll be the best Sirens we could be!
“At least, that's how 'Dagie would explain it to me.

"I don't really understand how that ended up in us eating sailors. They always gave me gas, too. Phooey."

Sunset's face turned a rather fetching shade of green, and she scooted away.

"Okay. Okay. Also, Dusk? Too much information. And, look, do you really feel the need to keep chasing an abstract ideal to its bitter end? Aren't you happier here, where you don't have to fight all the time, and where you can just enjoy life? You don't have to keep trying and trying to achieve something impossible, you can just live your life!"

Sonata thought about it for a second.
Then she thought about it for another second.
She thought about it for a third second.
Seeing how she was distracted, Sunset took the opportunity to whip out her phone and play a quick round of Angry Pigs.

"Hey, you're right! The food is much better here, and I can go eat hamburgers, and hot-dogs, and chili, and quesadillas, and burritos! I don't need to be sad just because I'm not doing something stupid other people tell me I have to do!"

Sunset smiled at the ditz, who kept rambling about all the food she was going to eat.

"What, no tacos?"

Sonata looked back at her and stuck out her tongue at her.

"Oh, please, they're sooo last week! Everyone knows Tortilla Thursdays are where it's at!"

They took a moment to look at their classmates playing a quick game of soccer.

“Anyway Sonata, there's other stuff involved. For example, not hurting others, so that other people will like you. Not forcing people to do stuff for you, because other people will dislike you.”

Sunset looked at Sonata's rapidly falling expression.

“Don't worry, it's not hard. It just takes a bit getting used to, that's all.”

The girls got up and started walking towards class.

“So what do you have right now?” asked Sunset.

And all the good cheer Sonata had accumulated evaporated.

“I've got ciiviics!! I hate that class! Nothing makes sense and I don't get it!”

Sunset reflected a moment.

“I've got civics too; what do you say we sit close together, so I can explain to you whatever you don't understand? Besides which, the teacher will probably be happy to see me tutor someone.”

Sonata looked at her with eyes full of adoration.

“You...you'd do that? For realzies?”

“Sure. Heck, we can start right now; what's one of the things you don't understand?”

Sonata blushed.

“Uhm...what's an ideal? And why does the teacher talk about them a lot?”

And Sunset patiently reminded herself to be patient. While she wouldn't win any Nobel prizes, Sonata could still be turned into a good person.

“You see, Sonata, it's like what Adagio used to go on about, but in many different directions, plus..”

Sunset's voice faded out of the corridor.

Comments

[Prane]

The story could use some polishing, but it was a nice read nevertheless. I especially liked the idea of Sonata staying at school unlike Adagio and Aria (I guess the remaining two are either too grumpy or too pompous to admit failure, while Sonata can do just anything without a care in the world), and you've captured her ridiculous silliness quite well.

Good luck, Sonata, I'm sure that with the help of Sunset Shimmer you'll do just fine - both in class and in life!

[devas]

5185207

Thanks! :-)

[devas]

5185979

What's wrong with shipping names? :-\

Some of them, in the Homestuck fandom especially *, are brilliant.

*communism, rosemary, etc etc

[ColdGoldLazarus]

Short, sweet, and adorable. You have earned yourself a like, good sir! Will there be a continuation?

[devas]

5188973

Thanks a million! :-)

But no, I don't think I'll continue it. I wrote it for the writeoff, and I have no idea of where the story would go. Also, the subject itself is kinda limited; one can write a "Sunset reforms Sonata etc." story, but to make it a full length novel one would have to put in extraneous elements to drive the plot forward.

[ColdGoldLazarus]

5189152 Good point.

[Krazy Stargazer]

Awww looks like the the Equestria Girls series gave us another fan favorite.

But Sunset Shimmer will always be my fav

[Themaskedferret]

Very sweet.

[Starlight Nova]

Written for the 2014 October writeoff, "Just Over The Horizon".

Where can I read all the entries for the write off?

[devas]

5193659

www.writeoff.me is where the actual writeoff is conducted, but the writeoff association (one of the groups in which this story is) is the group on fimfic

[Gravityguardian29]

Pretty cool story! i've been wondering what happened to the sirens after being beaten. I really hope we see a cameo of them in the next EqG movie. it'd be funny to see them having to work fast food or something for a sec.

Nice descriptions and keeping them in character.
the only constructive criticism i offer is to be careful with sentences like:
"And Sunset patiently reminded herself to be patient."

patient used two times in this sentence. Makes the word a bit redundant. Also starting the sentence with "and."

just my two cents, but other than that great story! Very enjoyable to read, and quick enough to read before turning in.

Great job keep up the good work!

[devas]

5196048

patient used two times in this sentence.

I'd actually done that on purpose, in order to convey Sunset's frustration. Evidently I failed :-/

Also, why is it wrong to start a sentence with "And"? I've heard that rule before, but I never figured out why :-/

[Gravityguardian29]

5196496
Ah ok i understand now! I also have no idea why that rule applies, its just been driven into my head since early school so i guess it sticks out. I was just trying to find anything to help out. it was a tough find believe me, the story was very well put together.

[Jordan179]

You probably want to reformat this -- something dropped most of your line breaks. Aside from that it's a nice little slice of life. I liked the "sailors gave me gas" line, and Sunset's reaction to it.

[devas]

5199856

Wait, but there was only one line break in the original, and I took it out because people were saying that so close to the end it bothered them :-\

[The Forgotten Siren]

I like it. Nice cute shorts story. very good.

[devas]

5201348

Thanks! :-)

[Csquared08]

This was... meh, to be honest. I had a good time reading it, don't get me wrong, but I feel like it could have easily been a lot longer. I dunno. The ending seemed out of place and rushed. And I get that this was originally written for a short story event, but I feel like since the event is over, you can turn this into a 2-3k word story and have it feel more evenly paced.

5200368
I think he was referring to the fact that most of your paragraphs had spaces between them, but at the end, they were all one big clump.

[devas]

5210558

but I feel like it could have easily been a lot longer.

I actually struggled to get it to its current wordcount :-/
I presume this is simply a current fault of mine as a writer at this moment. In the future I might do better :-P

I think he was referring to the fact that most of your paragraphs had spaces between them, but at the end, they were all one big clump.

Crap, you're right. Thanks for noticing, gonna fix it now.

And thanks for the feedback! :-) it was useful

[Csquared08]

5213670

I actually struggled to get it to its current wordcount :-/
I presume this is simply a current fault of mine as a writer at this moment

I know the feeling; it's the primary reason I currently have 0 stories

[FunFunFUN]

You could have kept on going! What happened?

[devas]

5367873

Dusk moves in with Sunset, they have a bunch of babies together, and Sonata becomes an Oscar winning comedian.

Adagio, meanwhile, chokes to death on a poodle.

[FunFunFUN]

5369160 Ah ah ahhhh I don't know how to feel the feel right now

[Murder Knight]

Well, you're good with characters. Everyone acted liked themselves. It's nice to read a short story like this every now and then, amidst the gigantic list of 100,000 word behemoths that take up a majority of my free time.

[devas]

5381282

Thanks! :-) And yeah, I know the feeling of reading an intriguing story description, thinking it might be nice to see what it's like, and then realizing it's +100k words :-P

[Malandy]

3848157

Because that story is shit.

Not as bad as some things out here. ... The philosophical stuff's nice.

... Needs better paragraph spacing.

magnum opus dissonance).

*twitch* 3/4 examples on the TvTropes page - Fanfic is FIMfic Ponyfic ... http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MagnumOpusDissonance