I like oc's and teleporting bread. Also WAAAGH!
Celestia has always wanted the best for her precious little ponies, however when a leader of a powerful nation starts to question her methods of taking out her enemies the princess's nation is threatened with war if things do not change...but Celestia has a different idea. (I had no idea what tags to use in this scenario, so alt universe cause cogdon is not a real place in the cannon, and slice of life because I don't know what the fuck else to put down...)
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Then Blueblood comes in a ruins everything! The story is good and all but it would have been better not ending it there.
5335836
Gladly noted. Thank you kind sir. I can edit it and try to make it much much longer, however this story is not at all completed, I just now realized I clicked the wrong button.
Lots of potential, but it badly needs heavy editing. Definitely a beta.
5336003
Yep. Any tips for me? I'm a bit of a noob. :(
5336003
Or do you know a good editor? Sorry for double comments...forgot to add that part...sorry...
5336017 what works for me is editing on paper. I may type on a computer, but I print out my drafts and attack it with great prejudice. But I'm also a blogger, so I cannot afford to lose readers due to bad grammar and/or improper spelling. Admittedly, I do have issues with verb tense. Unedited works can turn off potential readers, despite how titillating the plot may be. And I hold firm: this story has a lot of potential. It just needs polish and perhaps some work on pacing (story outlines are a writer's best friend). The first chapter came off like a prelude, so I thought the letters were enough.
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/197652/thardocs-editing-corner Here's an editing "group" if you're interested.
5336136
Thank you.
There were a couple points where you failed to capitalize the letter 'i' when it was part of a contraction like I'm. A helpful tip is to build a habit of manually capitalizing 'i' whenever it is used as a pronoun, that way you do not have to worry about the spell checker not auto-correcting it.
[ctrl]+[f] to find any time you said black gold. It is a name and both words should be capitalized.
5335927 OK then. And is miss not sir.
Writer here, I decided I'm going to change the first chapter to something completely different and make it more of a prequel to before they reached Canterlot to slightly build on the world of Cogdon.
Nice, please carry on, i really want to see the expresion of the main six, or twiligth when they see the king, please dont let these storie to die i am starting to see the awesome potential in the storie
Please dont let the storie die
5379483
Don't worry it won't.
5429266 so happy the storie have potential