I write pony words. Millions of them. Some people actually think they might be worth reading. I am very thankful for that. Also, I have a Patreon now?
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Rock studies are far more intense than most ponies realize. Maud Pie finds this one out the hard way when she goes out to the rocky badlands of southern Equestria. Fortunately for her, help will come from the most unlikely of sources, and she may learn a little about life in the process.
Written for the Everfree Northwest Pre-con Contest
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Welp...*flips table* I'm not gonna win...
5779621 kind of disrespectful to the author if that's all you have to say.
I enjoyed it.
5779628 Not really if you think about. I typed that before reading, which indicates that I assumed that it'll be better than my entry. Call it a hidden compliment.
But if it pleases you. I thought the story was a pretty good back story for Maud and Boulders first meeting, and an interesting concept for friendship. I never considered an inanimate object pairing.
5779645 Generally, authors don't like it when all a person does it complain about how they're worse than the author is. However, I'm not up to decide what Bronywriter thinks about your compliment. If it were my story, I'd be satisfied.
That's adorable.
And now I eagerly await a potential Bloomberg story for AJ.
In more serious terms, this is a nice little tale to read of a little stone doing a big thing for a lost pony. Thoroughly enjoyed it.
This is a very good Boulder origin story, and you write Maud well too. I enjoyed it.
d'aww
I think you nailed her personality spot on. Even if you don't win this was still a great story for Maud. I'm definitely going to load it into my headcanon.
The blend of the monotony that Maud embodies combined with the shock of Boulder stopping the boulders and the actual feeling involved in this story... It's wonderful in its simplicity. It explains the backstory, and even sheds light on some of her actions in the show.
I can see now why Maud hid Boulder in her pocket during the game of Camouflage. It wasn't some gambit to win, because she never wanted to win. The point of Camouflage was never to win. Pinkie loves games, but Maud couldn't risk Boulder getting mixed up with some other rock. Not after he'd saved her life. So she hid him in her pocket, knowing Pinkie would enjoy the hunt regardless. As for Pinkie's friends? Well, either she didn't understand the difference between them and Pinkie's idea of a game, or didn't care enough to change the course of action.
Good show for a one-shot about a grey pony looking at rocks alone in a desert. Made me think.
Wow, this was really good, I like this a lot, you really seem to have captured Maud's personality here...
5780106 yeah, definitely, what you said just now also, really makes me think.
Certainly a novel origin story, and a very strong narrative voice to boot. (Given that it's Maud's, I suppose it's strong in multiple senses of the word.) Thank you for this.
*clapping hands*
The writing is definitely pretty.
If I hear the word 'rock' again... it'll be too soon
Good read though, especially that one bit about rocks...
Official EFNW Pre-Con Contest 2nd Round Review
Wow, you really know how to turn a phrase... and how to get inside a character's head. I love how Maud's voice carries through the whole story, and I really love little touches like telling the reader she meant every syllable of 'ow'. And the actual story? It's beautiful, heartwarming, and strange all at once. A very enjoyable read. The only downside is that the mechanics of how the little rock stopped the big one baffled me -- that part perhaps needed a bit more/better spatial description so that I could visualize how that happened. Definitely going to be high up on my list!
I oddly enough don't have that many thoughts about this story. I know I like it, but I don't seem to be thinking much about it.
Still, I found this:
To be the most important sentence in the story. I suppose it's typical of Maud to not give it all that much... feeling. I guess Maud confuses me. I'm typically a bit more energetic: her behavior is rather alien to me.
Hello. Just letting you know that for reasons explained here, I've added your story to the Goodfic Bin (what with me being a story approver there and all.
Have a good one!
5834523 After having read your reviews... I gotta be honest, I'm still not 100% sure of what you thought, really.
hey, how was the contest?
5849289 Dunno, I haven't gotten the results back yet.
I didn't want to like this fic. I didn't want to root for a fic where one of the friends is an inanimate object... but darn it, you just got Maud so perfectly and the way she expresses affection for the little rock that saved her life is just... HNNNNNG!
I really enjoyed this little story and I'll be adding it to my faves. Good luck in the contest!
So I read this a few weeks ago during the contest judging, but as I was reading so many stories for it, I didn't have time to comment.
I think you did a good job showing Maud's character and personality, and I like your explanation for how she met Boulder (though the reason for the name is kind of a stretch.)
While it was well written, I must say it didn't really grab me. I think the main reason for that is the pacing. It completely fits Maud... slow, methodical, staring at rocks. It's good art to have form fit the story, but... it made it a bit of a dull read. Things that should have been exciting were, through the filter of the prose, made "meh." This can, of course, be used to great effect, and that's what Maud originally was... a perfect straightman/foil for Pinkie. However, without the comic relief bouncing against the immovable object of Maud, the story weighs too heavily on the stoic side of the scales.
There were some great memorable moments though. I especially liked the phrase "Ow, she said, meaning every syllable of it." The ending was also kind of touching, as she, in her own, drag way, contemplates how close she'd come to death and not seeing Pinkie again.
5932997 Well, glad you enjoyed some parts of it. Not sure how the name "Boulder" is a stretch when "he" saved her from a boulder. I did want to avoid it being too slow and plodding. My intent was to make the whole story "off-kilter" as it were. Not boring, but charming in the way that Maud is. Hence lines like meaning every syllable of ow. To be fair, it is hard to do a Maud story alone, so I did try to make it about her thought process (her thoughts about Pinkie and such) and to not make it drag too much.
Also, when are the results going to be announced? Or have they been already and I've just been out of the loop?
5933179 On the name... I meant, he saved her FROM a boulder. If she'd named him "Savior" that'd make sense. Or "Boulder Blocker" maybe. Naming him for the thing he stopped seems a bit like calling Batman, "Killer" because he stopped so many killers, rather than Batman, because he's a man dressed like a bat. That's just my logic though, and I totally understand if you (and Maud) have your own. :-)
And I can tell you put work into the pacing, it just... well it just doesn't work for me personally. Really, I think this is highly subjective and I know it. So don't take my "dislike" of that part of it to mean you did it wrong,. It's just that I have the attention span of a rabid mongoose I think, so that part of things weighs more in my mind than it does for others. Same way I know a lot of people that consider a story ruined on the third typo, but I usually don't mind a bit if it's otherwise good.
As for the contest... yeah, results went up last Saturday! https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/476366/efnw-writing-contest-winners Beware: Comments contain lots of drama. *sigh*
Also know that I didn't actually end up with your story in any of the brackets/rounds I judged, so as far as the contest goes, my opinion (negative or positive) on the story was completely irrelevant. In other words, "It's not my fault!"
All that said, I personally think this was in the upper level of quality for the stories we received, but it just wasn't quite as much of an all-around favorite as the final selections.
5933179 Oh, and normally I wouldn't do this, but... I'm going to talk about someone else's story in your comments.
Part of my opinion may come from the fact that there was another story in the contest that also features Maud, and so it was hard for me not to directly compare the two. Again, this is HIGHLY subjective, but I found I liked the other one more than yours, and I had to sit down and really think about the "why" behind that general feeling.
I know that's a horrible thing to say, as it sounds like "Hey, here's a story that did it better than you!" but I hope we've talked enough that you know I would never mean it that way. I'm linking it and mentioning this because I want to illustrate what I mean by personal preference, and emphaize just how subjective the final difference in choices are when the rest of the writing is done well. Many of the other judges didn't like that story as much as I did, and may very well have liked your take better. Still though, if you're curious, you should read A Bump In The Road. I'm not saying it's a better story objectively, just that I personally found it more appealing.
Oh, and you're welcome to tell me all the ways I'm wrong.
5934436 *Was one of the more quality ones. Wins last year. Doesn't even get an honorable mention.*
That's disappointing. Ah well. Thanks for reading it, anyway...
Just you wait until next year!!!
I love the way you have written this origin story. I love it a lot. I thank you for writing this.
Very nicely done n_n Sweet and funy and fits perfectly for Maud.
Good origin story for Boulder.