Newborn ponies have to be THE most terrifying creatures on the planet.
No seriously, Journal. I'm not kidding.
Pound for pound, a baby pony is one of the single most destructive forces on the planet. And I include hydras, dragons, and the occasional Draconequus when I say that.
See, even before they've learned to walk, a Baby pony's magic starts to set in, turning them from just another soft, delicate newborn creature, into a gurgling ball of adorable destruction.
Just ask the Cakes. They have a unicorn AND a pegasus. Within only a few weeks, Pound and Pumpkin were already like a barely contained natural disaster. Albeit I emphasize BARELY, considering they managed to bring Pinkie down from one of her sugar highs (If you've stolen my Journal and read my entry concerning Pinkie Pie, you'll understand why that observation is horrifying). And this is JUST a baby pegasus and a baby unicorn. Separate. Magical traits split between the bodies of two adorably destructive children.
Needless to say, I learned the one thing that puts the destructive potential of the average newborn foal to shame.
Her name is Princess Flurry Heart Mi Amore Cadenza Sparkle.
Most ponies will probably just call her Flurry Heart.
I just call her the Giggling Eldrich Monstrosity.
Except I don't. Because if I actually did, I'd probably end up sharing a cage in Tatarus with Tirek.
But I can think it.
And write it in my Journal.
So anyway, let's go with my usual format of explaining the mess more or less chronologically.
To begin, it should be noted that nowhere in any history, medical, or medical history books anywhere in any library is there ANY information on baby alicorns.
None.
Zero.
A grand total of LESS than whatever I might have had on Luna's medical history and Changelings in general. Because apparently the little Abomination is the first ever alicorn by birth.
Typical.
Now, for reference, I had nothing scheduled that would even hint I was going to deal with Royalty after the Nightmare Night fiasco. But it seems that once you're on a first name basis with Equestria's leadership, it doesn't matter if you are only a small town medical specialist with far less experience than most Canterlot physicians.
Nope.
Just doctor stable busting into my office near the end of shift with a parchment, a week train pass, and four simple phrases.
“You.”
“Crystal Empire.”
“Train.”
“Go.”
I will be getting my vengeance on him at some point.
Pinkie Pie will settle down one of these days. Maybe with that Cheese fellow. Then when the time comes, I'll use all that vacation I've accrued RIGHT when she's due.
Oh, right. Crystal Empire...
Worn out from a day of work, papers shoved into saddlebags and herded onto a late train, I was sent to the land of ice and snow.
At least the reveal that the Empire was nice and green inside it's weather dome came as a pleasant surprise. I mean, I've heard about it. But I don't exactly travel like Princess Twilight and her merry band of dead ponies walking.
But I digress.
Ten hours after being shoved onto a train car bound for the otherwise frozen wasteland, I arrive, only to be ushered directly to the palace. No rest, no recuperation, just... off to work.
Turns out Princess Cadence was in labor, and guess who got to play catch?
Now, I'm not going to complain about this part. When baby ponies want out, they wait for NO ONE.
You'd figure the Crystal ponies would be up to snuff on baby delivery, but as one would have it, they decided a royal delivery was too important to risk on their still-learning talent, and called in... You guessed it: Me.
Actually, delivery was the easy part of all this. And Cadence delivered an absolutely gorgeous and adorable baby girl.
With freakishly large wings for ANY newborn pony...
No seriously. Pegasi foals are usually born with their wings underdeveloped. Kind of like a baby bird. They're easier to deliver that way, and the wings will grow in as they age.
But Flurry Heart?
Aside from lacking in feathers, I'm surprised we didn't have to do a C-section with the size of those flappers. Proportionally speaking, they were fully developed alicorn wings for her body size, with a wingspan twice as wide as she was long.
Without any precedence for the situation, I can only write them off as 'alicorn birth'.
Now, after the birth, the usual checks go on. Check her vitals, clean her up, do a thaumitological reading on her potential.
Off the charts... Not unexpected. Alicorn baby.
At the time, I had pity because I realize that when that little one surged, it was going to be terrifying.
Oh, was I right.
Now, normally, baby ponies only surge a couple weeks to a couple months after their birth. Parents usually handle that nicely and there's always some kind of telltale event that signals baby's first surge.
Usually, it's a cold, or an emotional scare; something significant sets them off.
In the medical industry we call this Primary Care Stage Bio-Magical Ignition, or Primary Ignition.
The little one was already exceptional in several ways. She just HAD to break another record by getting a cold, causing her to commence Primary Ignition at one week old.
I'd been asked to stay the week and had agreed already. After a little sleep, caring for her wasn't so bad.
If I knew what was to come, I would have bailed on the Empire as soon as Cadence was cleared to return to her own quarters.
I was woken from my sleep about six days in by what I thought was an earthquake. Not familiar with the Crystal Empire, I didn't know any better.
But, it wasn't an earthquake at all.
The little princess had caught a cold, and surged. An alicorn surge, at one week old. She barely had the beginnings of motor control, let alone anything resembling magical control. So when I entered the room to ensure she was okay...
...Where did that skylight come from?
For a second, I considered suggesting the name 'Skyla' to Cadence. It sounded cute and basing it on the word 'skylight' made me imagine shafts of golden sunlight.
Said Golden sunlight was far less imaginary when it ripped from the horn of an adorable pink baby alicorn, and incinerated my hat on its way out said skylight.
My sleep-addled brain caught up with what was going on a moment later.
I also nixed suggesting 'Skyla'. On second thought, probably not a good idea to name an alicorn child something that might get her a cutie mark in blowing holes in the ceiling. That and princess of skylights seems a bit... Odd.
Now, to be fair, I was the first responder to baby's first cold, and aside from the death beams that seemed to be timed with every sneeze, I wasn't exactly new to cold-powered unicorn surges.
The new parents, however, were a little less calm about it.
Again, not unexpected.
My usual spiel about how to handle a cold in line with a surge followed, though I had to add some modifiers in the spur of the moment about their concern for her rather... energetic display.
To be fair, even I was at a loss.
Now, to complicate things, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna showed up that morning to congratulate the couple. But Flurry's cold was only getting worse. I won't go into too many details, but it all came to a head around nightfall as Luna was raising the moon.
This is where I decided the baby would be, in my mind, the little eldrich abomination.
I'd mentioned already the alicorn foal, the magical potential that confounded measurement, and her death beam shots on every sneeze.
Well... Luna learned first hoof about these concerns when the little one obliterated the moon after a particularly tenacious sniffle.
No, I'm not horseappling anyone. The moon is still there because Cadence asked Discord if he'd put it back together. But little princess laser face sneezed a bolt of magical energy with enough power to annihilate a planet, and caught the moon while Luna was bringing it up from the horizon.
Princess Luna's reaction pretty much summed up everypony else's.
It is only by one of the oldest standards of medical practice that we are all here today to have this go into my journal. Surging baby unicorns, especially ones with colds, must always have their horns facing skywards.
If that child had her horn below the horizon when she sneezed, we'd likely be asking discord to put us back together from the afterlife.
I pretty much noped right out of there after that. No amount of medical expertise on my part was going to do any good if that little abomination atomized me while trying to take her temperature.
I hear that after I left, the little abomination managed to nearly destroy the city by accident by shattering the crystal heart with a scream. It all turned out okay in the end, but after the fiasco, they officially named her Princess Flurry Heart. And I thought my naming scheme was bad. Imagine being named after a natural disaster caused by your own actions. I know I'd never live it down if I had been named Nurse Red Fountain...
But I guess alls well that ends well. And Luna's still in therapy with Discord for her moon exploding.
Until next time, Journal.
That's no moon.
PS. If you're gonna keep adding bonus chapters, maybe remove the Complete tag
Babies. Truly the most terrifying creatures imaginable. And yet we consistently fail to stop having them for some weird reason.
Well, it's good to see that someone is treating that little monster like the abomination it is.
Seriously, they should just put little Eldritch Abomination down and be done with it. It would save everyone a whole lot of trouble and probably reduce the overall body count.
8057391
"We're this close, to providing PEACE for the [Crystal] Empire."
8057395
Diabetes is one of those diseases you can get away with not treating for a while. It sneaks up on you and gets you even if you abuse the 'you're not screwed yet' period.
Yo this story is amazing! That gif at the end is especially useful, seeing as how I didn't watch any MLP past season 2...
I hope you add more chapters soon!
This baby is now the ultimate power in the (Crystal) Empire. Nothing can stop her now. Another great chapter, I hope you keep getting more inspiration. I almost kind of wish Redheart could have snarked about naming the baby Stardust, as that might be the only thing left next time she gets a cold. Which reminds me, gotta get the disc next week.
8057398
In all those AU's where different ponies become the Elements of Harmony or even the alternate timelines Twilight sees in her battle against Starlight... Pinkie dies because she can't afford treatment and Celestia isn't footing the bill.
8057398
Well, actually people can ignore a lot of illnesses before they enter to terminal "it HURTS" stage. Except, more often than not it is easier to prepare for funerals at this time.
8057394
Ray of Democracy.
8057550
Diabetes in particular is not an illness you necessarily get from outset.
Rather, it's a systemic failure brought on by too much stress to the system that controls your blood sugar levels. You literally CAN get away with sugar binging for years and years. You CAN get away with sugar binging even in the early outset of diabetic symptoms.
Eventually, these symptoms will catch up with you. The point when diabetes involves your blood sugar levels being completely out of control and dependent on your consumption of foodstuffs and use of insulin.
8057513 But wait, if she never became the party mare we know, would she have gotten quite so addicted to sugar?
8057391 Her power levels are at late DB/early DBZ levels. Ergo, she will be necessary for saving the planet at some time in the future. By killing her, you doom the planet in the long run. Nice job breaking it, hero.
That line...PRICELESS
8057579
Doesn't do anyone any good if she blows it up herself FIRST.
But who can say no to that adorable little death star?
Call Flurry Heart a little G.E.M. and you can get away with doing it in front of the parents.
8057601 Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
The joke is on you Redheart: CheesePie's foal will be a text-book exemplary case of an easy, uncomplicated delivery and the little colt will be as calm, phlegmatic, and quite as healthy possible for a newborn pony.
You on the other hoof will be stuck in a yurt in Nowhere, Middle Of in Outer Yakyakistan performing quadruple emergency caesarian sections to deliver the calves of the regional warlord chief...
8057673
She's almost truly outrageous.
Since you keep hinting at them im surprised you haven't done a cmc chapter yet.
BRILLIANT!!!
...Seaponies area thing in the newest movie it seems....
underwater birthing time?
SHE'S GONNA BLOW!
[youtube=XA1oOWVYxOQ]
I know many don't share my opinion,
but damn I love that kid. She is cute destructive ball of whopp-ass.
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
I just love these stories.
Aw, man, that was great! More, I say!
I lost it there
See, I came to ask for a sequel to Arrow 18... But then I saw new chapters for this one, and I had to read them. Mind you, I still want that sequel, but damn if I don't want more of Redheart too
Awesome chapter on Flurry Heart and how powerful a Alicorn baby is. I really love this series so far and sad to see it complete, but thanks for writing an awesome chapter!
Another excellent addition to this amazing story.
What really makes this fic is that Redheart sounds just like real nurses do when they socialize outside of work. If you hadn't been able to pull that off, it wouldn't be half as good.
8057351
Isn't it because then we'd all die out and become extinct?
8057963
You actually went there. Congratulations.
The Acronym is one letter off for the reference, though...
8194550
Thus the "almost". :)
Win
Okay, having her be at planet-busting power? A bit too far for me. But otherwise, quite nice.
8395787
... You know this story is a COMEDY, yes?
8536493
Yes, and? We all have our varying levels of suspension of disbelief.
8536511
Chillax guys. I'm not bothered.
It's a evolutionary defensive trait.
No predator dares to try and hunt a pony baby, because they are way too dangerous.
I'm actually imagining Palpatine holding Flurry in his hands and saying "Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL baby alicorn!"
Relevant:
You and probably most of the Brony community.
You majestic sonuva...
9181061
Okay, I've had a reader-spike since yesterday. Where are the lot of you coming from?
So Luna finds out the moon is now really made out of cheese after asking discord to fix it or did he do a gouda job and just used cheesewhiz to paste it back together?
Goddammit Primary Ignition took me too long to get.
8057925
I'd almost be willing to pay money and a free drink at a bar for that to be a chapter.
Nearest red heart playing doctor as a filly
https://youtu.be/T4JgQGxymtk
Geez, they really need to put magical inhibitors on all newborn unicorns, this is insane...
Flurry: I WASN'T THAT BAD!
...maybe i just learned from people who also blow up planets!