*snore*
*snore*
*sna-ack!
Whoa, how the hell did- oh shit! I'm behind schedule!
*Crash*
*Bang*
*Cough*
'Hmm, I wonder how many other sound effects I can add'
Oh, yeah storyline, uh, *rummaging through desk*
*Throws piles of paper at computer screen*
*Smack*
Take it!
I didn't know how long it had been since that first egg, but somehow I guess that one was the freaking Rambo of the bunch.
Seriously, it hurt like a bitch.
But, of course no need to focus on that.
'Oh hey, I think my eighty-ninth egg just got laid'
More important things are happening.
So, yeah, I've been immobile for about- 'Oh, there's another one' -about ninety eggs.
I guess you expect me to be, 'oh I don't know' freaking out about this- well there's only a small problem with that. You see, a Queen's emotions have a very big impact on egg laying. If a Queen's stressed it'll be harder for her to lay eggs. Happy, egg laying's a piece of cake. Scared, she'll lay them quicker so she isn't in a defenseless position. Fully freaked out?
Yeah, I was literally machine gunning my first forty eggs.
Don't worry though, before it could escalate, or any harm could come to the eggs, Scout calmed me down.
So, that's kind-of just been it. You know, Scout disappeared from sight a long while ago... my only source of communication. Gone.
Eh, but before he had went back down into his tunnel, he actually told me a bit of changeling history.
So actually, long ago, changelings came from one great queen, known only as the Empress. From her, the first seven queens were hatched, and they started their own hives. These hives naturally, found their way in the far south savannah lands, where they had more offspring Queens. The offspring Queens usually, stayed away from each other and eventually occasional wars would break out.
What happened to the Empress, no one knew. Once she had seen her children were capable of being on their own, she had disappeared. The seven queens eventually killed each other though, in a huge territory war called The Bloodied Savannah, which had scared off all, but very few zebras away.
So, shortly after The Bloodied Savannah, came The Great Famine, in which devastated the surviving offspring queens. So to survive, they scattered themselves throughout the savannah lands. Raiding soon became a common thing for the Queens back then, they would attack and slaughter weaker hives that were around, then drain the hives of all its resources to feed themselves. Sometimes, they enslaved them as well.
'But, why didn't they just move?' Good question, the only answer I could come up with are that the queens were stubborn dicks, and didn't want to. Kind of like, Scar in the Lion King.
Anyway, one day that all ended, when a changeling Queen known as Kalii decided she had seen enough. She had seen the races around them, creating societies, inventing new equipment, working together to improve themselves, and was pissed off that her race was too stubborn to work together.
That in mind, she still tried to diplomatically unite the hives. Sadly though, it was in vain, the Queens just didn't trust each other, and in hindsight they probably expected it to be some sort of trap. Well, good-Ole Kalii here had a sibling, which is rare in changeling queenships (usually back then since food was so scarce, when a Queen layed more than one royal egg, she would usually sit back and let the siblings fight each other to the death for the royal title.) but the reason this happened, was because queen Kalii's mother had died before the second egg had hatched.
As well for queens back then, they had to wait till the egg hatched, instead of picking the biggest egg in the bunch and smashing the others. This was because they believed queenship needed the perfect leader, and the survivor of the bunch usually worked the best in this regard.
Disturbing, but practical.
Well anyway, the second queen was Valin and like her sister she wanted the hives united. Unlike her sister though, she wanted them united under her iron hoof. She wanted to unite all the hives by force and proclaim herself Empress of the Changelings.
Kalii thought it a foolish idea, but Valin would have none of it. So, one night she snuck into her sister's room and murdered her in her sleep, a cowardly move, but by law she was then coronated queen of the hive. Of course, she then started cranking out soldiers like crazy, and she would do this by attacking the weaker hives that Kalii had allied with, and forced the Queens to produce eggs until they starved to death.
Valin was one insane bitch.
Eventually, she had an army big enough to take on the larger hives and went all Napoleon on them. I don't know exactly how long it took, but she eventually beat down and enslaved a vast majority of the queens. The rest fled and were known as Feral or Wild Queens, or were captured and turned into egg factories for the tyrant Empress.
This lasted for a few centuries until the Empress was murdered by her daughter, in which then started a whole "Hamlet" situation, which lasted until recently a new Empress got "Elected"
AKA: went all Scar vs Mufasa up in there.
I think her name is Ratha or something like that, nowadays the enslaved queens (what's left of them) serve her instead of being egg factories.
So, that's about it really, Changeling History in its most summarized.
Oh! Almost forgot! I found out why Scout broke down at questioning me earlier.
Basically changeling hives have there class systems, right. Queen is highest, caretakers are second, spies are third, warriors are fourth, and labors are fifth. Easy, right? Well, there's another rule.
Outsiders are treated like dirt.
No, I don't mean, you trip them and steal their love shares or something, I mean 'Not even classified as a sapient being.' Queen's word is law, question it. You die.
I can only imagine the propaganda.
But don't worry about that, how about I cheer you up with some fun facts.
Fun fact#1: female changeling drones can lay eggs, but usually one (sometimes there are special cases).
Fun fact #2: Changeling Queens ban marriages, and couples in their hives because of this.
Proof to theory, changeling queens are dicks.
Yes, I know what I am, you can stop raising your skeptical eyebrow now.
Sthap.
'My queen'
Yes! Scout's back!
I quickly returned to reality, "Yes, Scout?"
He gave a quick bow and motioned toward his hole, "I have finished a temporary nursery my queen. May I start moving the eggs?" he chittered.
I nodded, 'it was getting kind of cramped anyway' then I noticed I wasn't laying anymore eggs.
Let it be known throughout the generations, that there was a queen who jumped up and did a victory dance with a asleep lower body.
But enough about her, let's get back to the protagonist.
"I can't feel my legs" I groaned to Scout as he gently repositioned them so they could get some blood flow. "Your legs will be functional within a few minutes my queen" he stated calmly, and tilted his head when I groaned an "Okay".
After a bit of not hearing any movement I looked back at him, "Uh, Scout? You okay?" I asked and he let out a sigh.
"Are you trying to test me my queen" he asked, and with that awkward silence filled the cave.
"Um... no?" Dafuq am I to say to that?!
He let out a dissatisfied grunt "Then why don't you order me to go faster? Or speed up the process? Or for empress's sake at least punish me for speaking without permission!" he yelled and stood his ground.
Remember when I mentioned about outsiders.
I let out a weary sigh and forced my pins-and-needles legs up, and nearly fell shambled over to Scout.
He cowered as I towered over him, still holding his ground, he braced himself for what was to come.
I stopped right in front of him, and stared him straight in his eyes.
He froze as my brows furrowed, ears flattening against his skull.
This did nothing to deter me though, and I opened my mouth.
"Can you do that?"
"huh?"
"Can you do what you just said?" I reinstated, not getting where I was going, he slowly shook his head no.
I nodded my head, "Then why would I ask you if you aren't capable of doing it?" I stated as if it was the most simple thing in the world, and seeing Scout's flabbergasted face, I decided to let that hang. I slowly turned and shambled off toward my eggs.
As she got farther away, Scout slowly got up and shook his head.
After a bit he just stared at her, realizing he still had to move those eggs he sighed,"You truly are insane, my queen" he murmured and quickly followed after her.
Cutaway gag to this Queenling in a bar, snapping her hooves (somehow) at a few ponies, giving them a look, and a whole group then cutaways to sprawled in a bed.
7798566
Sorry, i fixed it.
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I'll be keeping that in mind though.
7798594 Oh it's OK! Everypony makes mistakes but it helps to make them funny ones.
This story is so redicules it actually kind of works
Also you deserve to die for that pun how dare you
I'm absolutely loving this thing, I hope to see more soon ! P.S. what is going to be the queen's name? I doubt that it'll be her human name, so could ya' maybe make it a reference for me, like oh... say... Kerrigan? I think that'd be great.
The changeling race is fucked. It seems like their culture is built around cultural stubbornness. Bring a human with half a brain into the equation and it all of their "traditions" will backfire due to the sheer impracticality of their lifestyles.
I love stories like this where we can flaunt our superior minds and glory to lesser races.
I hope to see more! Love the story!
Hmm, she took the whole egg laying thing much better than I was expecting. And the amount as well, so little. I was expecting she'd lay enough eggs to make a shiny hunter green with envy. Overall though, pretty good chapter.
7799079
Kerrigan... it looks like I'll have to consult the forces of dickery on that one
Your outcome seems favorable.
7799691 ThankyouTHankyouTHAnkyouTHANkyouTHANKyouTHANKYouTHANKYOuTHANKYOU!!!!!
It isn't bad so far, but it could really use a once over with an editor. A lot of easily fixed mistakes. I would recommend getting a proofreader if you don't have one. I'll stick around until I can't stand the errors. Having a good idea for the story line definitely helps with that. Still, fix those mistakes.
You changed the point of view here, from that of the main-character to that of an omniscient narrator. It is not only confusing, but also breaks immersion by having the reader look over it again so he realises what happened.
7935769
I got you.
its the stalin of the changeling queens.
(Casually writes down those quotes)
7937542 How did i miss that
jokideo.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/380707_417146508338360_222873157_n.jpg
So were there very few zebras to begin with, or... what?
8605171
There used to be a lot of zebras then they got scared off. Sorry if it was confusing
The whole narrated thing at the part is a bit weird, and idk if it’s against site rules or not. Site rules say you’re not supposed to put authors notes in the actual story, because it falsely increases word count, but idk if that counts as authors note....
"It goes you, the Dirt, the Worms In the dirt, PoPo's stool, Kami, then PoPo, Any questions?"
I really enjoyed those quotes at the end, as well as the story so far.
Honestly, we are all insane to a degree. Its just that the saner ones have drawn a line, when in all honesty they crossed it long ago.
9219690
Sanity is relative to the group
Fucking shambledXD lo siento but I couldn't stop laughing at every shambling line. I could see it in my head, and it only made me laugh harder.
7799164
You do know that humans have done more or less everything that the Changeling's did in this story, right? Hell, humans have done worse and yet we still here. Granted the current status of the world could change that.
10682843
It's terrifying to think that people today are so insecure about our own species' history that they're literally risking doing the same thing our ancestors did.
When being sensible is out of the norm...
Insane or genius? Success makes you a genius, while failure makes you Insane.
Ooooh, I like this Changeling Queen a lot.
Hopefully he will not follow their mess up Changeling History and befriend Celestia and Luna and be allies.
And follow Equestria Culture instead so they don't murder each other to death, and make a Healthy and not Evil Rule.
But this is not my Fanfiction and I'm curious how well it will go.
Hopefully this Queen will move her Hive into Equestria to befriend Ponies.