Pinkie Pie's Coke Dealer Gets Stiffed

by Super Trampoline

What's a Cockatiel Doing Turning Ponies To Stone?

Okay, So

What's a cockatiel doing turning ponies into stone? Ain't that, you know, the cockatrice's domain? What's this cocky fucker doing edging into his half-dragon, half-cock(the rooster, not the vulgar term for penis.)'s territory? We gonna get some turf warfare soon?

Nah nah nah, chill. It ain't like that.

See, you ever wonder where Cockatrice's come from? If I told you they came from a small dragon fucking a chicken during the age of Discord would you believe me? No? Well, tough titties. That's my explanation, and I'm sticking to it.

Anyway, we all know what happens when a cockatrice gets you in a staring contest. You get stoned.

Remember Keg Standard and Phantom Horn? Two Best Brothers Bitch About Ponies? They were like DWK before DWK. And wasn't Drowning in Horseshoes before them? Fuck, I'm not that plugged into the circle-jerk that is the analysis community.

So yeah, you look at a cocktrice and it looks at you and yous gonna be in a bad place hella soon. One of my first stories was about that. Maybe I'll finish it someday.

But that's a cockatrice. Not a cockatiel. So what batponyshit crazy explanation am I going to pull out of my ass?

Okay, get comfy children. Cause this explanation is going to get exceptionally stupid. With all apologies to Skywriter. God I'm so sorry dude.

This cockatiel was the immortal spawn of a cockatrice and a griffin named Auric.

Dun

Dun

Dun!