Epilogue
Hearts and Hooves Day passed, and Ponyville spent the next few days slowly sweeping away the various decorations strewn about the town, everypony done with the holiday until next year. Everypony except Meteorite who, now with her bottled up feelings finally free, was feeling emboldened by the joy and spirit of the holiday, and was gaily cantering down the main street of Ponyville. She paused briefly by Rose's stand, curiously eyeing the flowers on offer. She admittedly didn't know much about flowers to look at or, in a few moments of tempted curiosity, taste, but she picked a bouquet she thought looked nice and hopefully, Rarity would too.
Meteorite walked away with her gift, however only managing a few steps before she spotted the small purple dragon a few feet in front of her, staring back. His large eyes flicked to the bouquet for a moment, his tiny claws fidgeting together.
"You're… off to see Rarity, aren't you?" Spike asked, his voice trying not to crack as he looked away.
Meteorite's heart sank, suddenly heavy with feelings of guilt, of feeling like a homewrecker, barging her way into what was canon. She glanced at the bouquet nestled in the crook of her foreleg, briefly considering flat-out lying and claiming it was just a snack, but no. It was a tired trope, and Spike didn't deserve having his intelligence insulted like that.
"Yeah…" Meteorite said quietly, "I am."
Spike nodded glumly, unable to look at Meteorite. They both stood there for a while, not knowing what to say next. Finally, Meteorite gently placed the bouquet down on the ground and lowered herself to be face to face with Spike.
"Hey," she said softly. "Look, if… if I for whatever reason upset Rarity, you have my permission to kick my flank all across Equestria."
Spike scoffed as he crossed his arms, but appeared to consider Meteorite's words. He turned his head to face her, fixing her with a stern glare. "Yeah well, that's not gonna happen, is it? Because you're not going to upset her, right?"
Meteorite faintly smiled as she shook her head. "No, sir."
Spike still glared, but it seemed to soften slightly as his arms uncrossed, falling to his sides. "Well… good." His gaze drifted away for a moment. "As long as she's happy…" he mumbled.
Meteorite swallowed before rising back to her full height. "You're a good one, Spike. I respect you."
"Pft, yeah," Spike scoffed lightly, "I'm still gonna hold you to that promise, you know."
I don't remember saying it was a promise but, "Of course," Meteorite said, giving a sympathetic smile, "I mean, I don't exactly want a vengeful dragon after me, after all."
A few moments after they had said their final pieces and parted ways, Meteorite watched as Spike walked off in the distance. Her ears dropped slightly as she frowned.
"I hope he'll be okay," she said to herself.
"He'll be fine," came a voice off to the side.
Meteorite blinked as the background noise of the town was crushed beneath a sudden silence, and even the air itself seemed to halt. She slowly turned her head to see a figure, somehow both familiar and foreign at the same time, sitting on a nearby bench, smiling serenely. And without a moment's notice, lost memories suddenly returned to Meteorite with full force, filling in the blanks she hadn't realised were missing. Her eyes went wide with recognition, before narrowing sharply.
"Alexandra," she hissed, before her memories had finished trying to line up the facts she knew. She momentarily hesitated. "Wait. Wait, so… ohh. So that was the moment Rarity was talking about."
Alexandra nodded, still smiling. Meteorite eyed her cautiously.
"You know, I should still be mad at you."
"I know. I'm sorry, I really am."
"S'okay…" Meteorite grumbled, "I mean…" she bit her lip, considering her next thought. "Did you… know, me and Rarity would end up together?"
Alexandra's smile grew slightly, even though she shrugged. "I had an inkling, but nothing definite."
"An inkling."
"Well, it's like what I told Rarity; I wasn't going to interfere." Alexandra then rolled her eyes and sighed. "Though, the two of you damn well frustrated the hell out of me towards the end there! I so wanted to get it through your thick skull that Rarity liked you, dammit!" She balled her hands into fists, but then held her hands up open, exhaling. "But, no. It had to be done by you two alone. I wasn't going to do anything about it."
Meteorite scoffed lightly, before frowning in thought. "So wait. If you're not 'interfering', why are you here then?"
"Oh, well," Alexandra said somewhat flippantly, "I figured I might as well show up for the epilogue."
Meteorite blinked as her ears fell flat. "Epilogue?"
"Yup!" Alexandra said cheerily, "Story's over! You got the girl- well. Both of you got the girl," she winked, causing a slight blush on Meteorite, "and this feels like a good time to go out on."
Meteorite glanced around. "It… does? I mean… no offense, but I really don't think ending on you and me talking is a good way to go."
Alexandra cupped her cheek and chin with her hand, a sly grin on her face. "Oh dear… you're right I think."
Meteorite raised an eyebrow, suspicious. "What are you up t-" Meteorite paused, suddenly hearing the sounds of hooves hitting the ground rapidly approaching in the distance. Alexandra continued to grin.
"If only it wasn't just you and me unaffected by this!"
Meteorite turned to the fast-approaching sounds, staring into the frozen town waiting for something to happen. Suddenly, from a nearby junction Rarity came galloping, skidding to a halt, frantically looking one way then the other, before spotting Meteorite and Alexandra looking back at her. Wide-eyed, she ran over as fast as she could.
"Darling!"
"Rarity?" Meteorite questioned, not used to others being around while Alexandra was here. Rarity ran up to her, and the two of them embraced in a comforting hug.
"Oh, Meteorite darling! I was so concerned! All of a sudden, everypony just stopped moving! But then, I remembered that's what happened when-" Rarity glanced over, "-she was here, so I waited for her to appear but she didn't so I thought to find you and then I heard voices in the distance and so I came running!" Rarity took a moment to compose herself, breaking the hug and clearing her throat, before facing Alexandra fully. "Miss Alexandra."
Alexandra chuckled lightly. "Miss Rarity," she greeted back.
Rarity glanced over at Meteorite briefly, concerned. "Darling, what's going on?"
Meteorite opened her mouth to respond, but unable to quickly think of what to say, Alexandra answered instead.
"I just wanted to thank you both."
Both ponies turned towards her. "Thank us?"
Alexandra smiled, turning to Rarity. "Rarity, I just wanted to say that… you've managed to do what I didn't think was possible, and for that, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I don't know what the future holds for you two, but whatever it is, I can trust you both with it."
Alexandra then turned to Meteorite, her smile growing slightly sad, slightly confusing the pony. "And you, Meteorite… I'm very sorry that I felt I had to interfere when it's clear now that it wasn't really helping. I hope you can forgive me for that."
Meteorite glanced at Rarity before trying to wave it off coolly. "Pf, yeah, no worries. It's all cool."
Rarity nodded. "Yes, no forgiveness is needed. You were only doing what you felt was the right thing to do."
"Besides," Meteorite shrugged, "you kinda helped us get together anyway by screwing up."
Alexandra blinked. "…Huh. Didn't think of it like that."
Meteorite giggled slightly, prompting Rarity to join in. Alexandra smiled at the pair, before standing up, catching their attention.
"Before I go," Alexandra began, "I have an offer for you Meteorite."
Meteorite frowned slightly, hooking her hoof around Rarity's. "You're going? What offer?"
"Yeah…" Alexandra sighed, "think it's best I go soon. But anyway! My offer is simple. Once I leave, things will go back to how they've been, or… you can continue remembering our meetings, like Rarity had. Your choice."
Meteorite's breath caught in her throat as she considered the option before her. She felt Rarity squeezing her hoof slightly, offering her support. Looking up at Alexandra, she swallowed.
"Honestly… I don't want to forget you ever again. Yeah, we had our fights, but… I'd rather have that than nothing at all."
Alexandra smiled. "Same…" She stretched for a moment, before taking a few steps. "Well. Time to go. You two have a great life, you hear?"
"Will we see you again?" Rarity asked.
Alexandra paused, considering the question. "Probably not… you two don't need me around anymore," she shrugged, "not that you needed me much to begin with anyway."
She took another few steps before Meteorite called out.
"Follow up question. Will you see us again?"
Alexandra slowed down, pausing by the junction Rarity came out of. She turned around, her only response being a wide grin, before ducking out of view, returning the world to its former bustling activity. Meteorite and Rarity glanced at each other.
"Figures," Meteorite snarked, rolling her eyes. Rarity laughed lightly.
"You know…" Rarity began, "it only really just occurred to me that the two of you sound very much alike."
"What?" Meteorite said disbelieving as she walked over to where she dropped her bouquet, "No we don't."
"You absolutely do!" Rarity protested, "Identical!"
"Well, if you say so," Meteorite dismissed, checking the bouquet making sure it was okay. "I couldn't hear it." She walked back over, with a smile on her face. "Anyway, more importantly! I bought these for you. I hope they're good enough. I don't really know flowers that well."
Rarity took the bouquet, breathing in the scent. There was a small pause as she glanced at Meteorite before returning to the flowers, her brow furrowed. Eventually, Rarity looked at a now slightly concerned Meteorite, her eyes lidded.
"Well, the important thing is you tried."
Meteorite's face fell, which made Rarity unable to hold her façade and broke into a reassuring smile. "I'm kidding, darling! I'm happy you made such a thoughtful gesture." She caressed Meteorite's cheek with a hoof, before kissing her lightly.
"Really?" Meteorite asked, slightly breathless.
Rarity nodded, before clucking her tongue.
"Well, not entirely." She trotted off towards Rose's cart, before turning back with a wink. "Come on, I'll show you which flowers to get next time."
~The End~
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EYYYYYY
This looks very interesting. I’m going to have to take a look!
It is so awesome to actually see this here. It's a lovely, lovely story!
I'm always a bit wary of self-insert stories but this was very entertaining to read. Bit of a unique take on the concept. Nicely done!
Wow! How nice you published the whole story at once.
Dreadnought
9173235
EYYY ^^
9173342
Thank you! I hope you enjoy it!
9173387
Thanks Stretch!
9173453
I totally understand the wariness, heh. But I'm glad you liked it! It took me (and my friends) a while to convince myself it was worth sharing.
9173719
Yup! All the agonising over whether or not I could finish the story was done in private.
This is super cute. I liked it a lot. Majin recommended it to me and for once his awful taste wasn't so awful. It gave me this really early-fandom feel, and that's not a bad thing. Hope to see more from you.
Thanks for writing it and I hope this story gets some good coverage.
This was a mighty interesting story, and quite cute too. I admit I wasn't sure about the Meta-fictional opening, nor how that would tie in with the romance part, but you managed to tie everything up neatly.
Thank you for the story, and I hope we're gonna see more of you.
Majin sent me here. This may be the most meta story I've ever read, and I'm enjoying the hell out of it.
Excellent for a first (published) story. If we're lucky, we'll see more great work from you.
To be honest, I always feel guilty whenever I don't finish a story -- I don't want to be one of those fanfic writers -- which is why I decided earlier this year to finish a story I started in 2015 but stopped.
In my original works that have nothing to do with MLP, one of my characters is aware of me and hates me for not spending enough time writing or drawing her.
Your story made me cry. I love it.
9174244
I'll admit, I've always enjoyed testing the boundaries of meta...ness. Playing around with the self-insert meta sounded appealing when I first thought about it... but I lost steam with that story after a few chapters. But I guess it was all just building up to the meta of this story, heh!
9174260
9174837
Thank you all!
And I hope I'll be able to put out some more good stories for everyone to read!
9175361
Awwww~ I honestly was not expecting a response like that. I'm touched.
9175519 - Well, it's true. Watching Meteorite deal with her unrequited love, her anxiety, the depression, her loneliness, I made a connection with her right then, and when it all worked out, I felt such relief for her. You did a wonderful job.
9175559
...Thank you. It means a lot to me to hear that, it really does.
So let me get this straight.
You started this before you were even on Fimfiction? You started a story, but then got stuck, you could've just left it, you did leave it, but you came back and thought "Oh yeah that, I should do that."
You didn't let it sit as some flight of fancy, some half baked attempt that would arrive only to be forever labeled Incomplete. You finished it, all of it, then you posted in it's completion and it was featured within days.
Inspirational.
This inspired me to finally start writing again after starting a story several years ago. It probably won't be that same story, but I'm going to start something and not let myself back out because of worries that I'll mess it up now, thanks to you.
9176143
The original story is still unfinished. I just used that story's unfinished status to build the beginnings of this story. I do still think about that first story however. One way or another, I'll need to address it eventually, if just for personal closure.
Weeelll... not quite.
9176268
That's... wow. I'm so glad to hear you've been inspired like that! Go for it! I believe in you.
Wow this looks so similar with my OC!It seems that the color I've chosen is still too common for OCs......
*looking at my story left unfinished one and a half years ago*
...
Well. It's not dead!
But seriously, this was weapons grade cute and a beautiful take on the self insert genre. Does the story in question actually exist? Even though the 'Waking up on Sweet Apple Acres as a pony and romancing one of the Mane Six' has been done to death by now, it'd be fun to compare the two.
Anyway, thanks for this and have a green thumb.
9176467
You made something out of what you already considered a lost cause, call it whatever you like, it's still pretty friggen cool.
Actually kinda makes me want to do a self-insert fic of my own where my OCs (all four of them) interact with one another and myself. Sort of like... they know they're all the same "person", being that they're all parts of me, but they're all also their own "person". I just don't know how they'd interact with each other.
Knight Shadow is a wolf prince from the long forgotten Shadow Clan, their home in Hollow Shades needing to be abandoned because of the Pony of Shadows. He's got wings and his right foreleg is encased in a golden gauntlet he "acquired" from Canterlot that he can't take off and it's slowly growing, encasing his entire body as it replaces his magic with its own.
Arcane Sigil is the newest OC. A unicorn stallion who barely skirts the edge of not being a "red and black" OC because he's got white and blue in his mane and tail as well. His special talent is making magical sigils he can place on objects to strengthen them, weaken them, or turn them into weapons or traps. He can go into "Magic Overdrive", which alters his cutiemark somewhat, as well as gives him magic rivaling Twilight when she had the magic of all four Alicorns, at a cost. He's so exhausted after Magic Overdrive he can't move.
Shadow, just Shadow, is litterally that. He's a Shadow. Twilight's Shadow. Not to say he's her darkness, but he's almost every dark thought she's ever had given form. He's obsessed with Twilight because he doesn't exactly know why she created him, or how, but he does want to get something out of her. He just doesn't know what yet.
And my latest, just before Arcane, is South Wind, a Kirin. Before the Kirin became a thing in MLP lore, she was a pony kidnapped at birth by a dragon, who was then put through a magical... thing... to turn into a dragon-pony, or a Kirin. One of the only Kirin (until they were introduced in the actual show), she travels to Ponyville seeking her real parents, her pony parents. I haven't decided if she should be Twilight's long lost sister or related in some way to Pinkie or one of the others, but it's getting there.
9176617
Ha, yes, I've noticed that myself over the years. I've admittedly bristled up slightly every time I see any other pony that's vaguely purple and red. But really, it shouldn't matter; it's part of who they are, just like it's part of who Meteorite is, so I've been learning to just accept it's just a common colour combo. In any case, I think your OC looks fine as she is.
9176735
The story does exist, six or seven chapters of it here on my hard drive! Although it's a completely different story to the one posted here. That story was going to be more about Meteorite trying to figure out just what the heck my intentions as an author was, and possibly trying to stop it because surely I was up to no good. At least, that's how it started. I think I kinda lost focus developing the rest of the plot in my head. Probably why I stopped.
But in any case, romancing Rarity was definitely not going to happen in that story. This story here was just something silly I started writing, that ultimately turned into something serious, heh.
9176779
A very good point! Thank you.
As a general rule, I don't read:
1) Self-insert.
2) Human in Equestria.
3) Breaking the fourth wall.
Needless to say, I broke all three reading this story - and I'm happy I did. It was a very good read, balancing drama and romance with well-timed comic relief. And it's nice that unlike some authors - excuse me as I look in a mirror- you had the entire story written before you started publishing. I hope we'll be
seeingreading more of your work in the future.Dreadnought
9180040
Thank you for the very kind words! I'm happy you stuck with it and liked it. I have to admit, I was somewhat fearful people would be put off initially, for the same reasons you listed, but the responses so far have all been lovely.
A beautiful and wonderfully bizarre work of romantic metafiction. Definitely some of the best canon x self-insert I've ever read... though the third-person omniscience did feel like authorial cheating at times.
In all seriousness, thank you for it.
Definitely a creative idea, and I like how it played out. If I had to complain about anything, it'd be the fact that we don't really get to know Meteorite that well. If she was basically an offshoot of a younger Alexandra, how did they diverge in personalities over the years? Did she go through a sort of existential crisis when she realized she was a self-insert? Exactly how did she adjust to becoming a different species? I feel like, if you took the time to address some of these things, the story would've been even stronger.
9203913
Yeah, I definitely see your point there; it's one of the regrets I have of not finishing the original story, as it would've touched upon a lot of what you mentioned. I'm... not quite sure how I could've brought it up in this story without it feeling forced, though.
Oh well. It's not like I'm done writing about Meteorite anyway; next time I'll see if I can go more into detail about those unseen years.
This was a spectacular read, I'm glad Admiral Biscuit recommended it to me. Bravo, and I eagerly await to see what else you can do.
Suck it up, Spike, you shitlord. >:V
I hope there are more stories in you, because I'd like to see them. :D
9353072
Whew, okay! Where to start?
Yes, we all do! It pains me to remember that my original plan for the unfinished story was to write Flo and the other farmhooves out halfway through. I'm... still not sure why I thought that was a good idea to begin with.
Hee, sorry.
Thank you! Pinkie is my second favourite, after Rarity of course, but writing Pinkie has always seemed to come easily to me, so I cherish any moment I get to write her.
And the same goes for Trixie, though I've haven't really practiced writing her until of late. But yes, writing her in all her greatness and powerfulness when I can is so much fun.
I hope so too!
Only time will tell, I suppose, heh.
Not surprising to me that Alexandra was still hanging around for a bit. She let the story wander on its own, but she had to be around to bail Meteorite out in case her attempt at wooing Rarity (or rather, Rarity wooing Meteorite) turned into a complete disaster. Now that they're together, she can be off and let the story continue on its own.
Nice fic with lots of meta in the beginning. Not quite what I was expecting from the story synopsis, though.
9821892
I will try to respond as much as I can!
Wow, thank you for your thoughts! It was a pleasant surprise checking in to see so many notifications
Honestly, there's probably a lot you can psychoanalyse about me based on my 'interactions' with Meteorite. Not sure if self-loathing about timidness is there, though! Food for thought, maybe.
At this point of the story, I was still writing short snippets in the mindset of 'Let's see where this takes us', so it definitely was organic writing to begin with. It wasn't until later on I thought to myself there could be an actual story here, so it became slightly more structured. (though I still did not want to restrict the characters' freedom of choice)
While that's definitely a concern, heh, the point was more that yeah, I could just write 'and Rarity was madly in love with Meteorite' but it wouldn't feel genuine, to me or anyone, really. That said, I suppose one could argue this whole story is just that line slowly cooking over the chapters.
Yeah, Meteorite was pretty much me in 2011/12. The goal was to have her character progress in her own story, but that story's progress petered out early on so she kinda stagnated, with only idle daydreams about her throughout the years guiding me to how she would be today.
I'm fairly certain Rarity would not be the first one to ask, so I'd 100% say Meteorite has no doubt spent the past seven years building up a fake backstory that's totally uninteresting and does not invite any further questions about it.
Oops.
Yeah, that chapter I was just having fun with, trying to figure out all the possible interactions Meteorite might actually have with the others.
Truthfully, intended to have Twilight there, but I liked that cut to Starlight instead. Also, Starlight means Trixie. I like Trixie. 
Y'know, that's a fair critique, looking back at the story. I suppose at the time it was more about Rarity trying figure out if Meteorite's the type she'd like to date. But I think you're right; I should've put in a bit more indications of Rarity's feelings.
Thank you. It means a lot to me that you gave your time to read and give thoughtful comments on it all.
And yeah, I think I just didn't know what to put exactly for the synopsis. Didn't help that I was pretty nervous about putting the story up in public for the first time too.
I've read this story back when it was published. Because I didn't have a profile, I didn't leave a comment, though I've shared my thoughts with the author personally. But, hey, since I'm "formally" here now, I guess I'll leave some proper comments.
Metalanguage in a story is a very, very tricky thing to do. It can often come across as a gimmick, as a gratuitous attempt at humour, and it can often lead to more confusion than clarity. We usually don't want to be reminded that we're reading a story written by an external author, because, in theory, it shatters the immersion. Also, historically, when the barriers between author, characters and audience are broken, it's usually either to make an important point (e.g. Bertolt Brecht) or for bold humour (e.g. Pinkie Pie).
What this story proves is that this can be done for a touching, cathartic emotional experience. In other words, Meteorite Shower has pulled off the impossible here, and delivered not just an endearing story of love, affection and self-confidence, but a profound meditation on art itself, the act of expressing oneself through words, the process of self-discovery and the search for identity, and what a show like My Little Pony and the art of fanfiction means for people.
Of course, this is only possible because the writing and the craft are on point all the way through. Prose and dialogue are just stellar, and all these situations and emotional elaborations just reach through the screen and touch you directly, pulling you right into the characters' minds and hearts without mercy. Meteorite herself is relatable and fully fleshed out, and the canonic characters are absolutely on point.
In short, this story is like a little miracle. It looks impossible on theory, but the execution is so perfect that it just can't fail. It's such a flawless gem that it's something Rarity herself could've found.
10842554
Goddamn fernie, you're gonna give me an ego bigger than Trixie's
But thank you for your kind words~
This is a fasctinating story, but on its conclusion I'm left with mixed feelings. This initial concept and delivery drew me in, but the last third of if feels like the author gave up because it was too difficult to write.
Early on, Rarity seemed to have two motivations. That everybody deserves a chance of love was present, and suitable for her chracter, but the stronger motivation seemed to be existential fear over the potential loss of her sense of self and self determination. She asked to retain her memories in order to maintain control of herself while faced with an unknowable superpower capable of rewriting reality on a whim. A situation she was already familiar with, because of prior encounetrs with Discord.
Rarity is smart. Maybe not book smart like Twilight, but her intellect is far more cunning. Rarity has a degree of wisdom and inflappable composure that every other member of the mane six lacks. Remember that Rarity is the mare who was abducted into slavery, and while everypony else was panicking and trying to save her, she not only rolled with it without being psychologically damaged, she mastered the situation and came out on top. The comedy of Rarity's peronality is that she's an immovable rock when it matters...and freaks out only over trivial things. She's the sort of pony would could casually walk up to a gunman and explain that "what you're is wrong, darling, and while I understand that you might have to shoot me and that's just how it is, please do at least consider the all the unsightly blood splotches my exploding body might make on that lovely vest you're wearing, because it really would be a travesty, dear."
Rarity could say that with a straight face, and she would have the courage to do it even knowing that she would die, provided that she knew was was saving the lives of others in the process. And then, in the very next scene she might panic and scream over a mouse.
The first part may be why Rarity is beautiful, but the second part is why she's lovable. Without that flaw, she would be unapproachable. She'd be too perfect. She'd be an ideal that would be difficult to feel worthy of. Her imperfection makes it easy to allow ourselves to love her.
This story, to my eye, presents itself as Rarity facing what to her must seem like a cosmic horror of power, and then discovering that it likes her. That power feels guilty because while yes it adores her, it doesn't want to destroy the thing that it loves by compelling it to reciprocate those feelings. And Rarity, also not wanting to be destroyed or toyed with or manipulated by that entity...and incidentally also being a little wiser and more emotionally durable than the author, understands and concludes that the best solution is for her to fix the problem in the simplest way, for her to take charge and fall in love back herself.
It's a facinating concept.
But it falls flat, because about 2/3 of the way in...it feels like the author simply gave up, and decided to have Rarity suddenly be in love with Meteorite for no obvious reason. That's not what was supposed to happen. As Rarity said, "perhaps the're another way." And, "she may just need a second chance." But...there was no "second chance" given by Rarity to Meteorite. Rarity simply arbitrarily went from not-in-love to in-love from one chapter to the next with no explanation of how or when or why.
In this story, Rarity, with the same emotional unflappability and pragmatic problem-solving that allowed her to deal with being abducted into slavery by daimond dogs...faced the simple fact of being a character in a story wanted and desired by an entity who both wanted her and wanted her to love her back by her choice, and pragmatically deduced that the correct solution was for her to come to know and love that entity-via-avatar by her own choice. Keeping her memories was first step in maintaining her own control. She couldn't fall in love by her own choice if she was was an unknowing puppet living in a world being reset until the random number generator produced an acceptable outcome. So she engineered the situation with the author in a way that allowed to her maintain her independance of mind with the goal of herself producing the desired outcome.
This is all completely consistent with the Rarity that is Rarity.
But then the author apparently forgets about this, and has Rarity simply being in love with Meteorite without ever giving Rarity the chance to make it happen herself. Rarity is never shown falling in love, and that's terrible because that's the thing that Rarity intended to do because by doing it herself instead of the author "making it happen," she would have maintained her own self-determination.
It's a disappointing, and self-defeating conclusion to a story that would otherwise have been excellent.
11245087
Thank you. I won't lie and say it didn't hurt to see that I may have given up, especially since that goes against everything I've strived to do with my writing. If I had at any point felt I gave up because it was too hard, I simply wouldn't have continued or posted anything.
But I do agree with your assessment, and to relate to an earlier comment I received, I do believe I failed in fully exploring and conveying Rarity's thoughts and feelings towards the end. And considering the story I've just released, I... think it's a lesson I still need to take to heart.
So, thank you for reminding me. I'm truly sorry the ending wasn't satisfying to you, and I can only hope I will do better in my future writings.
Wow, such unusual story. And seeing other's long comments I can't not try writing long one myself.
I haven't seen story where plot is based on author being actor outside and character inside. Lauren in Equestria? Yes. Author in fanfic? Maybe. Like this? No.
I liked it, but the ending kinda lost me. Feels like you faltered off the path you were intending to go down.
Still liked it, just feels like it fell flat in the end.
Huh, sudden influx of attention...
11493056
I'll admit Meteorite's status as a character is kinda weird, but at this point I wouldn't have it any other way.
Thank you.
11493068
That's fair. I'm willing to admit I may have let myself be enamoured by an ending I wanted, even if it doesn't flow perfectly with audience expectations. Still, thank you for taking the time to read; I only wish I could have made the ending satisfactory to everyone, but I don't see that being possible.
W o t ?
11503125
Just a little joke. 🙂 I tend to let loose with my profanity when not in polite company (and by extension, Meteorite does too), and us Australians are known for our casual vulgarity, so...
11503186
I thought Aussies were only known for calling each-other ‘cunt', as A terme of endearment, - which isn't even unique, since folks in the U.K. do, too. Always interesting to learn something new about Sustealia. I learned the other day that Australia's not just sub-arid, savannah-like outbacks and coastal beaches. The fact the Land Down-Under is mostly tropical is amasing and incredibly-intetedting.
11503194
Well, while I personally can't speak for the entirety of my country, but yes, some of us do use that word that way (the boys in my group certainly do, at least). I myself try not to (unless they're being particularly moronic :p ) and stick to the more 'standard' set of curse words, I suppose. *shrug*
In any case, I just thought it added a bit of humour to the summary.
11503213
I definitely understand. I personally Love Australia, the Aborigines, and the Aussies from the big land. Australia's always been One of My most-favourite places in the world, so I always enjoy to learn something new about the Land Down Unda.
It’s a pretty unique take on OC pony TF. I hope there’s more an adventure oriented version of this type of story.
i mean the only canon thing happening here is a literal child crushing on his older sister’s adult friend!
it is fun that the author in the story is being a reader surrogate right now
well, i personally think it’s a really cool and good way to end a story! but will never complain about more Rarity
ehehe, more stories with these two to come?
so true, this is exactly how Rarity would be given a heartfelt gift of flowers by somepony who knows nothing about them. and ending it on Rarity being Rarity is a great way for the story to go out.
i think my brain must have edited out that this was a self-insert x Rarity story at some point after i put it on my reading list because it was such a joyful surprise to read. i felt seen in a way that is a rarity (heh) on this site. thank you so much for writing this!
11659254
aaaaaaa you don't know much I been holding myself back from responding to your comments when I first checked in and was bombarded with all your comment notifications all at once! I, heh, wanted to wait until you finished first.
First off, thank you so much for all your lovely praise of my story. I was so positively giddy with every bit you highlighted and praised the characterisation of. It'd been a while since I wrote the story, so it warmed my heart to hear so many positive things about it.
I've also enjoyed reading all your musings and ponderings, and even had a couple of 'dang, wish i thought of that!' moments. (particularly the idea of Sweetie Belle catching Rarity slapping herself, hehe)
All in all, I'm super pumped that you've enjoyed A Second Chance as much as you have! I hope you'll give its sequel/prequel/inspiration Fictional a read sometime, as while it unfortunately focuses less on Rarity, it might help answer some questions you've poised about Meteorite. (which I am still writing, I'm just being a butt with the latest chapter, and also having a bit of trouble figuring it out (no need to be specific on which chapter; I'm sure it'll be applicable to any and all future chapters))
11659415
oh i am definitely reading the sequel/prequel/inspiration! my reading list is just very long, sadly. but i'm glad you enjoyed the comments, and thanks again so much for writing this!
(also i admit i had a hard time picturing Meteorite reading this and it only literally came to me now that i could've just looked at your avatar, haha)
11679279
And, eeee you're welcome!
That's fine, I figured it was something like that.
Also, noted about Meteorite's appearance. I'm... pretty averse to flowerily describing characters' appearances, so beyond initial introductions I've probably gone the other extreme and dropped most if not all descriptors. I'll have to try and remember to sprinkle a few about in the future, not so much as a necessity, but just a gentle reminder of what the hell they look like.
A well done romance! Bravo!