Source Code

by Nugget27

Fuck You, Discord.

Before a second could pass, after I casted all the charms and enchantments, I immediately casted a spell on my wings to hide them. That will probably put a target on my back that I do not need right now. Twilight and company looked ready to fight me, until Twilight herself spoke up. She looked… well, like normal Twilight. My Twilight. Granted the eyes are a bit off, but that’s probably because those violet eyes of hers aren’t filled with the warm, friendly look that I’ve come to know. Instead they were mostly curious, but still cautious… She has wings in this… timeline, I suppose. In fact, everypony here, save Sombra, looks like everypony back home.

Sombra himself was eying me with the same curious, but mostly cautious looks that everypony else here was missing. He wasn’t wearing battle armor, he wasn’t covered in smokey, dark magic. He didn’t even radiate dark magic at all. In fact, his magical signature was… wow, he did not have that much magic. Sure, it was a lot, but it was nowhere near my world’s Sombra that’s currently being burnt away in the Sun. Sombra actually looked like a more well-groomed, less evil version of my Sombra with a regal, purple cape with white fluff on it. Upon his head was a similar crown to the other Sombra, though it had a purple band and a yellow gem of some sort, instead of it just being made out of metal.

“What were all those spells you just casted?” Twilight asked. “You casted sixteen of them at once… which is something most average unicorns aren’t able to do. In fact, that’s sixteen spells that I’ve never encountered before." Each one of her little friends looked shocked at that. A spell Twilight didn't know? And sixteen of them at that? Holy fuck!

“I’m making sure that, no matter what happens in the next five minutes, I don’t implode. I’ve casted fourteen charms and enchantments, and a spell that I’ve dubbed the Light Shield. Each spell is from a system of magic I’ve made myself. I won’t say what the last spell I casted; I don’t want anypony finding out about what I am, and no, I am not a fucking changeling. If you think I am a changeling, you’re fucking stupid.” I kept my gaze on Sombra the whole time. “So what’s up?” I asked, stepping into a more relaxed pose.

There’s no need to let them know that I can use DragonFire, or any of the other spells in my repertoire that I can use to escape.

“...Who are you?” Sombra asked.

“Uh…” I hummed. “Source Code. I’m… a dimension hopper as it seems. I’m not exactly what you’d call a ‘mage’ or whatever. I was supposed to be learning how to use portal magic, and wounded up here instead of back home while trying to get back home. I believe I know who you are, King Sombra. Then there’s Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie. Apple Jack and Fluttershy. And then there’s Rainbow Dash and Rarity. Whole herd’s here. Uh…” I hummed. “What the fuck is going on?”

“...You’re a dimension hopper?” Apple Jack asked. Fuck. She’s looking skeptical. The problem I’m gonna have is hiding the truth from her; she’s a goddamn lie detector inside of a mare.

“Yeah. I’m from Equestria… I guess I’ll call my timeline ‘Python’ for now, since the main difference I’m noticing across all these timelines I’ve come across, all of three, I’m… not a thing across any of them. Like I’m unique to my home timeline. Back home, Sombra isn’t a ruler, well, not a good one. Cadance and I just got done kicking that guy’s ass before I started trying to take lessons on portal magic. Celestia and Luna are the main princesses of Equestria, I’ve got a kid named Button Mash, sweet little unicorn, and I’m a thing that exists, according to my son, I guess.

“I’m not a super strong mage; most unicorns probably could overpower me. But I am a mage and I like to believe I’m somewhat powerful.” I teleported to the side of the room without Python so this universe’s Twilight, or Sombra, would pick up anything bizarre from me using my spell system. My horn immediately started aching and I developed a very fleeting migraine. “I can cast spells, and have a large catalog of spells to choose from. I just lack the magic reserves to constantly use those spells and often fall flat of what is expected of me.

“Despite that, Princess Celestia picked me as her consort, and as one of her personal students alongside Twilight Sparkle, who’s a unicorn… I dunno how. Buck, I don’t even know how I became Celly’s husband, but god damn I’m lucky.” I hummed. So far everypony, AJ included, was believing me. That’s good. Not telling the full truth, but not telling any blatant lies. Celly taught me that. Something about politics. Sombra cleared his throat.

“You are married… to another Celestia?” He asked.

“I am. I don’t believe I know your Celestia,” I pointed out.

“I know of… Two Celestias,” Sombra spoke. “Are there other worlds? Like more than these two? Or do we know of the same Celestia?”

“Apparently there's hundreds of alternate realities, I flew by a few dozen of them after some fuckwad named Discord tossed me in here after he rubbed my belly. Dickhead. Anyways, you know of two Celestias, so I assume you know of two Lunas.” I pointed out. “Because I just left a timeline where both Celestia and Luna are the same age, and have complete control of their… darker forms. Daybreaker and Nightmare Moon. Alter Egos if you will. I think. I know of another world, my own, where Luna has a coltfriend, and I’m Celly’s husband.”

“...Nightmare Moon and Luna are two separate entities,” Twilight pointed out. “And who is Daybreaker?”

Ah. Even in this timeline, she’s her little group’s leader.

“Back home, they’re alter-egos. Right down to the point where I got Nightmare Moon to apologize for sending Celly to the Sun during the Summer Sun Celebration.” And with that other timeline I was just in, I suppose. “Alter-egos that come to being because of their negative emotions.”

I immediately picked up on a magical signature I was all too familiar with, though this one had a darker feeling to it… Two familiar magical signatures. “Oh fuck-”

The side of the throne room got blasted open by Celestia and Luna. Unlike my Celly and Lulu, they… did not look very nice or friendly. In fact, they looked just a little murdery. One thing I instantly noticed was they were actually using eye shadow. Like any stallion of culture, my eyes immediately went to Celestia’s flanks, and noted that the center of the sun on her cutie mark was blackened out. Luna had a blood moon. Both… actually had their manes cut shorter than Celly and Lulu back home. Celestia’s crown almost looked like a pair of dragon horns, whereas Luna was wearing a crown that resembled bat wings. Celestia’s necklace had a short, purple hood in it. The two of them were wearing a set of boots… Celestia had a purple set and Luna had red boots.

Celestia had her hair and tail tied back, with her tail ending in a scorpion’s tip. Luna had her mane in a ponytail and her tail was tied back too.

They immediately saw Twilight, since she was the only alicorn in the room besides them.

While the two of them began to tease Twilight, which ended up being not a good idea, I started devising a plan. You see, when Celly or Lulu are in a room, even if they do their best to lower their magical signature to not seem imposing, you can still feel them in the room. Their signatures never fully go away. I’ve felt Celly’s whole magical signature, and constantly do feel it because of our wedding rings… though I’ve left mine at home so I wouldn’t lose it in another timeline.

That would be bad.

But anyways, with my diagnostic spell, I can tell just how much magic is being released by a pony and if it’s all their magic. Celestia and Luna, these two at least, don’t fill the whole room. In fact, Twilight the Alicorn, seemed to have a larger presence. I suppose when you’re evil, and by default, stronger than everyone else, you don’t need much of a reason to improve. One can seek power to keep their loved ones safe. Or you can already have power and be a complete asshole.

Celestia and Luna, here at least, are complete assholes with power.

Luna got stung by Twilight, who was clearly getting sick of being teased. She probably also didn’t like having an alicorn’s hoof so close to her head; she’s lucky her head’s still attached to her neck right now.

And fighting ensued almost immediately afterwards. As soon as Celestia threw her first volley of spells at the girls, I immediately put up a barrier in front of the girls, and simply remained seated. Luna tried, but I immediately casted a Mirror in front of the girls, and Luna’s attack went right out the wall that got blown up. I remained in my spot, silently observing. Everypony seemingly forgot I was here since they all turned to me and started blinking. Oh. I’m using Python. Well that fucking sucks; they know my secrets now. I simply tilted my head and remained silent.

I even curled my tail around my hooves like a good little stallion.

“Oh?” Celestia asked as she started stepping towards me, her sister in tow. “And who do we have here?”

“Howdy,” I said in the most friendly, fast food customer service voice I could manage. “I’m Source!” I waved. I wish I either had whisky, or still had my old McDonalds uniform from when I worked there. That would’ve been funny.

“Oh, she has sent her consort along as well?” Celestia asked as she got closer to me. I know I reeked of my Celly. It’s something I proudly bore. This Celestia had a lot of perfume on, and it woulda made me gag if I were in any other situation than this one.

I nodded along. “I am a consort of a Celestia. Mind telling me what’s going on?”

“Oh, nothing much,” Celestia giggled. “Dear, King Sombra here was about to accept my offer. After all, if he takes it, his kingdom is safe!”

“Lemme guess, you wanna go to another Equestria, where another Celestia resides, and fuck up that Equestria?” I asked. I titled my head. “If so, then that’s a damn shame.”

“...You’re a perceptive little thing,” Luna pointed out. “And he radiates with such power…” She hummed.

“Perhaps we shall-” now you see, when Celly tries to stroke my jaw with her hoof, it’s a good thing. It feels good, I like it, she likes doing it. Celly is so gentle with me, and I’m the same with her. Celestia, however? Bitchlestia touching me? nah. I was on the other side of the room in a heartbeat after using a teleport. I don’t want my neck to get snapped. I don’t plan on dying here. “What?’ Bitchlestia asked. “I thought you would like a familiar touch. After all, how can your princess compare to I?” She said in… she’s trying to sound seductive. “I mean, the best roses are always covered in thorns.”

That would be an enticing offer if I fucked with crazy cunts.

“The moment I let you touch me you’re gonna break something. I don’t plan on being broken, you dirty little whore.” I lit my horn. “Come now,” I said. “I’ve fought my Celly, and she’s a shitload stronger than you; I will kick your shit in.” Even if I really do not want to have to. Luna was at her sister’s side in a moment, their horns ignited.

My Light Shield caught their spells and immediately grounded them down into dust. I side stepped another spell and shielded my rear as Luna tried to get a hit on me from behind. I DragonFired out of the way before goading Bitchlestia and Cuntuna to one side of the room. I didn’t even fight back, I was leading the fight… I went around a pillar, before spinning around and grabbing Bitchlestia with some telekinesis, and spun out the way just in time for Luna to accidentally slam into her sister.

“Boom,” I said. As soon as this happened, a letter appeared in Sombra’s grasp and he started reading it. I immediately brought up a shield, waiting for what the King wanted.

“Stop,” Sombra said. Before his horn could even light to bring a barrier up, I formed my shield into a barrier and kept our group separated from the dazed, villainous princesses.

“Come on!” Celestia said as soon as she shook away her daze. “Fight us like a stallion!” She growled. “Or are you too scared?” she pounded on the barrier, but it held strong, so I took my focus off of her for a moment.

“Sombra,” I said. “Wassup?” I asked. I stopped trying to hide my wings. I just held them to my sides.

“You attacking those two affects the other world’s Celestia and Luna,” Sombra began to explain. He was holding a letter, “our worlds are very closely bonded, even if they are not closely bonded to yours, apparently. I suppose our worlds may not be as close as yours for some reason. But needless to say, don't hurt those two even if you might want to.” He wasn’t even fazed by me being an alicorn, or was trying to keep a straight face.

“So I can’t just fight them, I got it.” I turned to see both Celestia and Luna eying me. “What’s up?”

“Another alicorn?” Celestia asked.

“No, I’m a pegacorn. The main difference is… I’m not even that strong. My world’s Celly would deck me any day of the week. My world’s Twilight would fucking mop the floor with my corpse if we actually fought to the death. I’m weak, but I’m not an idiot. Fighting two alicorns dead on is suicide,” I cracked my shoulders. “So, we ain’t fighting til we find a way to kick your asses without hurting the other Celestia and Luna. They may not be my Celly and Lulu, but I don’t want them getting murdered because I killed you two.” Or rather, get them killed. I doubt I could actually deal damage with my own attacks. Not to these two at least.

I think the fact that these two, while similar to my Celly and Lulu, look vastly different. Unlike in that timeline that left me scarred, where they looked exactly like Celly and Lulu, just evil.

“Well,” Celestia growled. “If I can not extract my revenge on you for making a fool of me, I shall see my leave.” I put a tracking spell on both asshats without them noticing; Python’s cool since nopony else, across any timeline, has encountered it as it seems. My horn unlit and the barrier went down as the two dickless dickheads flew off into the sunset. It would’ve been beautiful, even a lovely sight; Celestia no matter the universe was a sight to behold, after all.

Though this Celestia was a crazy fucking bitch.

---

“What the buck?” Said Twilight’s voice. I turned around, after stretching like a cat. I was needing a good stretch, maybe even a nap. I turned to see the Girls staring at me in awe. Sombra was too, now that he didn’t have to keep a straight face. “What were all those spells?” She asked. “Actually, what was that spell output?” She continued. “And did you just ascend on the spot?” She asked. Great, Twilight will Twilight no matter the verse. “You casted sixteen different charms and enchantments at once, used three different spell systems, two of which I’ve never seen before, and you’re doing it casually!”

“Uh,” I hummed. “I dunno. Seriously, I’m not that strong, magic-wise. You could literally beat the shit out of me really easily-”

“You just fought Princess Celestia and Princess Luna,” Apple Jack pointed out. “You fought them and didn’t instantly die.”

“And you had complete control over that fight,” Rainbow pointed out. “You didn’t-”

“Again, my Celly hits harder than either of those dickheads while we’re sparring. You get stronger to protect the people you love. That Celestia is content; she’s already able to kill somebody with a spell pretty easily, no need to improve, right? I’ve also sparred with Celestia and Luna in the past. Mine at least; I know how they fight, and their synergy while fighting together is flawless. They’ve shown me how they fight, without holding back, while fighting illusions. Celestia and Luna, this world at least, were not synergized at all. I dunno if Celly actively knows it, but when she fights with Luna, she often fights and tries her damn best to keep Luna out of harm’s way. Luna does the same. Here, they were getting in the way of each other, like when Luna flanked me when Celestia was trying to hit me with some high power spell, and couldn’t because Luna was there. Or when I made them run into each other.

“Plus, they’ve never encountered somepony like me. I’ve a spell system they’ve never seen, I kept myself as a unicorn the whole time to make them more willing to try and kill me; I look a lot less assuming without wings, me thinks.” I shrugged. “I dunno. If I tried that shit back home, I woulda died.”

“...Spell system? You used three!”

“I used a conventional spell system to make myself appear weak. I used Python, my own custom built spell system, and then Light Shield made its own spell system whenever I almost got hit. I can’t reproduce any of the spells Light Shield creates.” I shrugged. “By the way,” I hummed. “I know where those two dickbutts are. Since they don’t know Python, they don’t know that I put tracking spells on them. I may go hunt them down and talk to Luna.”

“...But they’ll try and kill you again,” Twilight pointed out.

“And Evil Luna, honestly, looks adorable. She probably just needs a hug,” I shrugged. “Evil Celestia though? No shot in hell that she’s redeemable. Luna looks like she could be convinced to not be evil, Celestia just seems set in her ways. Fuck, I counted at least six times where Celestia looked like she wanted to hit Luna instead of me during that fight. Luna was trying to keep my focus off of Celestia; Luna cares about her sister, yet her sister doesn’t give two fucks. I’ve learnt how to read those faces a while ago; I can tell when Celestia cares, and god damn does she care about her sister. Evil Celestia doesn’t.”

Sombra nodded. “I see.” He looked around. I don’t think any of what I said actually stuck. Fluttershy was eying my wings, Rarity was eying my entire me, AJ and Rainbow were eying me legs, and Twilight was brainstorming ways to take out Celestia and Luna.

“What if you went and talked to Luna, then?” Twilight asked.

“Mmm. I could. I’ll wait though.” I shrugged. “It’s wise to not mess with what’s going on in other timelines.”

“Yeah! You don’t want to mess with the canon, not canon comic, Source!” Pinkie pointed out. Pinkie, no matter the Pinkie, is fucking weird. “C’mon Cody, you know for a fact that we’ve met before-”

“Da fawk? How do you know that name?” I asked.

“Don’t worry about it!” Pinkie giggled.

“So,” I turned to Twilight, since I’m going to assume she has a plan. “What are we gonna do about the crazy alicorns that want us all dead?” I asked.

“Well…” Twilight went on and on about how we can’t actually fight the evil princesses without hurting her timeline’s princesses, so… we were going to imprison them with crystals. Magic absorbent crystals, so that the evil princesses can’t really get out, but aren’t actually hurt in any way shape or form. I hummed. I pulled two magic prohibiting rings from my Magical Butt Tattoo Pocket™. I slowly looked at them again, and back at Twilight.

“How hard is it to make a jail cell that an earth pony can’t immediately break out of?” I asked.

“Not very,” Sombra answered. “Why?”

“I could just knock both princesses out and slip them on them; it’s a new thing I’ve been testing. I once tested Dark Magic, and while fighting my timeline’s version of Sombra, worked out a Superconducting Loop spell. Basically it takes an opponent’s magic and uses it against them…” I lifted the two rings. “So each time the evil princesses try to use magic, which would eventually break a regular prohibiting ring, these ones should strengthen every time. It’s a mixture of the Runes I’ve written into this shit, and also using bronze; something that doesn’t exactly conduct magic.” I tapped them. “We could stun them and lock them in a jail cell, or stick them in crystals. Whichever y’all prefer…”

We aren’t alone. Luna’s watching us.

I didn’t mention a word to anypony though. In order for my own actual plan to work. As much as I like Twilight's foolproof, super thought out plan, what’s stopping me from taking the best, most efficient route?

As in I was going in blind, and hoping for the best… Twilight, my Twilight, would beat the shit out of me for having such a poorly knitted together plan. I don’t got a backup plan, quite frankly, I think we’re all fucked since the moment I run out of magic, I’m gonna die. The moment these two timelines collide, we’re fucked. The moment that Celestia and Luna quit toying around with us, because they’re assholes, we’re dead. I may have said that I can tell how much magic Celestia and Luna were using, but they were toying with me.

Despite them actually trying to kill me.

They still sucked shit on synergy and subsequently are way easier to fight than Celly and Lulu at the same time…

That doesn’t matter. Two alicorns is two alicorns, and I don’t think they’re gonna give me the space to work my Source Code Shenanigans again.

---

The sky was beginning to crack and stuff. The worlds are growing closer with every moment; the world’s ambient magic was fucked up. While that was happening though, I took the time to find a spell book… Wow, the same three basics to magic, Runes, Will, and then Hybridizing the two into actual spells. I should amend what I initially discovered upon coming to Equestria simply because nopony really corrected me since I guess I wasn’t completely wrong? Runes and Will were really the main components of spell casting. You can technically cast with one or the other on their own, but combining the two makes it so casting more complicated spells is easier.

Runes were a way to remember a spell, commands, essentially. Will is basically your ability to work through calculations, and then you Hybridize them to get spells such as Teleport. Will can be used alone to do stuff like mind control or Levitation. Runes can be used for enchantments and charms. When you use Runes though, you do use a little bit of Will to work out the calculations... Unless you etch them into something like a wall for enchanting, I guess. When you use Will, you really don’t use Runes at all. When you mash them together, you get spells that are actually repeatable and are able to be written down.

The problem is that when Hybridizing, Runes take up a good amount of magic, and time, then Will takes up more magic.

So Python shortened both processes down and led to a greater result. Though it only did so much in that department and still really fucking sucked if you were already a magical monster when it came to spell casting. At least Celly trying to use Python got me to learn just how much she likes seeing her stallion in a suit. Then she found out, somehow, that I like ladies that dress up in suits… She definitely read my diary. Oh well. I was gonna read hers, but hers is the size of my fucking torso.

Celly is one hundred percent reading my diary with Button while I’m here. I just hope I can get home for dinner like Discord said I would.

Anyways, I found a portal spell and I immediately started trying to work it into Python’s better optimized Runes and Will.

I laid in the throne room, trying to figure out how the fuck I’m gonna convert this spell into Pyrhon. Sombra was explaining the differences between ‘Equestria Prime’ or what Pinkie called ‘Cannon but not really Cannon’, and Sombra’s world, which I am gonna call ‘Equestria Composite’ for now. I was trying to stay out of the way and let the big ponies do what they do best, which is actually use their brains to come up with a plan. And mostly so Prime Twilight doesn’t start asking me for all the differences between my world and these two. Sombra started regaling us all of how he and Prime Celestia met and became lovers or something. I didn’t pay much attention. The whole time, Luna was in the shadows, the evil one, watching us.

I still didn’t say anything. I don’t want anypony knowing about how easy it is for me to pick up on a pony’s presence.

Or my other abilities.

Using DragonFire was already too much of a showoff, and nopony even knew what the fuck Light Shield did, or even was. They just assumed it was a fancy shield spell.

Even though we both had basically the same plan, mine being cheaper, nopony really thought that my plan would be very good. Which was just to stick some rings on both princesses and call it a day. Crystals were better, apparently, and Twilight got all the praise for said plan. I didn’t care; it was going to go poorly and we’re all gonna die. So I had my own secret plans. The first step was hugging Luna. The second step was removing Evil Celestia’s Magic. The last step was throwing her in the ocean in a body bag… If I have the guts to actually do that. I probably won’t. If I could I’d just hug both of them and make them not evil.

I still think only Evil Luna is redeemable even if Sombra says she isn’t. I can still see some good in her, not a lot, but some.

Before long, we were walking towards the Castle of the Two Sisters, which sat nicely on a hill. I decided to hide my magical signature and instantly start DragonFiring around the hill the castle sat on, before Skywalking so nopony would actually notice me. You know, the fact that nopony noticed that I went missing says a lot about the situation, but quite frankly, that worked out for me. As soon as I got into position, I started watching Evil Celestia and Luna as they were watching Prime Girls and Composite Sombra approached their castle.

As Celestia began telling Luna about her plan, something important happened that I noted. Luna really did think her sister wanted to rule alongside her. While Celestia probably had zero use for Luna beyond using her to get a leg up in the world. Tis a shame; even in this world, Luna was a bit of a dork. I continued to watch them. Sombra and the girls finally got up to the castle, Sombra was giving a speech about how ‘your defeat is nigh’ or whatever, Rainbow, in Rainbow Fashion, almost got herself killed by trying to charge at two alicorns… if Apple Jack weren’t there, Rainbow would be smeared on the ground she was hovering over.

I watched and watched until Celestia’s horn lit up. I was thinking she may attack the ponies down below, and I was going to stop her-

HOLY SHIT THAT IS FUCKED UP!

Celestia just struck Luna. That’s it. That’s fucking it. That’s fucked up even for me.

You don’t hurt your siblings, let alone try to kill them like what Celestia just did.

I slapped the ring on the bitch of an alicorn, that was this world’s Celestia, and jumped off the balcony after Luna. I caught her in my hooves and formed a Bubble Shield around us before we hit the ground. The poor lass was burnt where the spell actually hit her. As soon as the Bubble hit the ground, I used Friction to keep us rolling and possibly hurting Luna more. She was still alive, still breathing, but not very well… That hit her in the ribs dude. As the worlds started to merge, I watched as yet another Celestia, holding her injured Luna.

I laid there, holding the evil Luna as I watched the following events unfold. Evil Celestia jumped off the balcony, but because flying for ponies is more magic based, fell off the balcony. I caught her with my own Levitation and laid her on the ground… After Gluing her side to the grass. Composite Luna was starting to awaken at least. I still laid there, holding her as she slowly blinked.

“What…?” She lifted her head, only to bump into my jaw.

That didn’t feel good for either of us. My teeth clicked when my jaw got forced close, and Luna bumped her head.

“Fuck!”
“Buck!”

We both blinked, we were still in the Bubble I got to my hooves while Evil Luna stared at me from her spot on the ground. She was doing a lot better, thank god for Alicorn toughness. “Are you alright?” I asked, lending a hoof to her. Fuck me for adoring Luna so damn much. She tilted her head. “I don’t think taking a hit, or a fall, or a hit to the head is very healthy.” I rubbed my jaw. Ow. It still kinda hurts.

“Is this some sort of trick?” She asked. Mmm. Fucking Lunas and their ability to be cute no matter what. Even the murdery ones.

“Nope.” I shook my head. “Remember how I smell like your sister, or that I am the consort of your sister from another world?” I asked.

“I do. Why do you ask?”

“Simply put, my Luna, my Lulu, is a lot like a sister to me. Our roles switch from time to time, sometimes she plays ‘big sister’, sometimes I play ‘big brother’. Luna wants to be the older sibling, and I was an older sibling to three other siblings so we often take turns being the big sibling. With that said, however, I adore Luna. I’ve been to many other timelines, all of three. My own, one where you, your sister, Cadance, and Twilight were all alicorns and committing genocide. Lastly, one with Celestia and Luna, as true equals, with complete control over their ‘evil’ forms.

“I do not enjoy seeing Luna, any Luna, get hurt. Even the evil ones like yourself.” I kept my hoof offered to her. “Well?”

“...Okay…” she took my hoof and I pulled her up. She sat on her rump. “I am still feeling a little sore,” she nearly stumbled and fell again, had I not got to her side and held her up. “You do understand that I could be deceiving you, correct? I could break your neck right now if I wanted to. It would be rather entertaining,” she mused.

“I know you could, but I also know you’re hurting. I know how hard Celestia can hit, and regardless of the world, she hits fucking hard. I don’t think she went light on you, did she?” I asked.

Luna started rubbing her chest fluff. “...My chest hurts and so does my right foreleg.”

“That makes sense, that took the blunt of the strike,” I hummed. “Hey you’re alive, aren’t you?”

“...Perhaps,” Luna grinned maliciously. “You won’t be soon.”

“Yes I will,” I patted and rubbed her head. “I know you’re hurting way more than you’re letting on, or I would’ve been dead already.”

“...How?”

“I spend a lot of time with Lulu, I know when she’s hiding shit. For instance, she feels the need to torture herself when she sleeps with… something, I don’t know what. I also don’t know why; she atoned for what she did. Lulu got stuck on the moon for a thousand years, and constantly tried to make breakfast for Celly upon her return. She’s a little cinnamon roll, like I know you could be.” I laid down and Evil Luna followed suit. I instantly teleported out of the bubble. Only then did she notice the ring on her head. “But I know that probably won’t happen.”

“Why…” We turned to see Evil Celestia, having been dragged down from her balcony, laying on the ground while… I guess that’s Prime Celestia, glaring down at her evil reflection. “I wasn’t going to hurt you.”

“You were, you were going to try and break my neck at some point; I know my Lulu, and I like to believe I know Luna as a whole.” I shook my head. “I feel bad for ya; at a moment’s notice your sister would happily wanna kill you. If it wouldn’t completely fuck up both your world and Prime Twilight’s world, I’d offer you a home back in my timeline. I would, but then you’d probably turn around and try to kill us all.” I shook my head. “I had hopes, Luna.”

“...I will kill you the moment I get out of this Bubble and get this horn off my head.” I ignored her and walked over to Prime Luna. She… had the same injury that Composite Luna did. I prodded her with a hoof until a golden beam whizzed towards my head. If Light Shield wasn’t active I probably woulda died. Celestia, Prime Celestia, was standing in an offensive stance, glaring at me. Mmm. That cannot be good. I blinked after Light Shield teleported.

“Whoa there,” I raised my hooves. “Why are you attacking me?”

“You were near Luna,” Celestia growled. “While she’s hurt! You’re clearly protecting her,” she pointed at the Composite Luna. She tried putting herself between myself and Prime Luna, but I teleported behind her and knelt down. I put a hoof on Luna's neck, and patted it.

“You alright?” I asked.

“Wha…?” She was still dazed. “I don’t want to be an accountant…” She slurred.

“Thatta girl,” I patted her neck again and stood up. “I’m not on anyone’s side, Princess.” I sat down. “I’m not here to fix or cause problems, as I just want to go home.” I tilted my head. “Mmm, actually no. You’re fucking terrifying when you’re pissed the fuck off. I would know; my Celly damn near seared a griffin with just her glare alone when said griffin tried to kidnap me. Good times,” I chuckled. “So uh, I’m dating you, or rather, another timeline’s you.” I sat on my rump and looked around. “It seems like your world is getting smashed into this one,” I hummed. “Uh…” That is really not good.

“Holy shit this place is fucked,” I mused.

“Oh sweet moon,” Prime Luna mumbled as she stared up at me. “You’re handsome.”

“You’re underage,” I said immediately. I patted her head again. “When you’re older, we’ll talk!” I joked. “So, Princess Celestia, wanna attack me again? It won’t work; works wonders.” I hummed. I walked back over to where Evil Luna was held captive; she just broke a hole through my Bubble. “Howdy.”

“Hold it,” Princess Celestia ordered. “Who are you?” She asked. I turned away from Evil Luna who was now, like a distinguished little lady, sitting like a cat, with her tail curled in front of her, watching every move. “What are you? Your magical signature is… unlike anything I have seen before.”

“Just some guy. You could kick my shit in if you wanted to,” I shrugged. “So how’re y’all gonna fix your worlds? Finna be honest, I don’t know how the fuck I can fix this.”

“Your accent is rather unique as well…” We stopped as King Sombra stepped up, the Elements of Harmony in tow. “What are you doing, Sombra?”

“I believe I know how to fix this…” He said matter-of-oh fuck he’s gonna get himself killed. “If I can drain the evil from my world’s Celestia and Luna… then our worlds may fix themselves.” Seeing as Evil Luna was trapped and Evil Celestia was currently chained to the ground, they really couldn’t move. As Sombra absorbed the darkness within his world’s Celestia and Luna, Prime Celestia went up and hugged him, I suppose in a way to support him?

“Why hello!” I turned around to see… Discord. Motherfucking Discord. “Well that’s some rude inner dialogue, my little chaos master. You seem to have not made as much of an impact on this world as I thought. Hmm…” He hummed and started scratching my ears with his talon. “I could send you back home. You would still appear around supper, don’t worry, time works differently across the multiverse when I’m involved. I’ll just have to call in a favor from my least favorite Doctor to make due on my promises.

“Though I wonder,” he hummed some more. I was trying to maintain my mind and not accept the ear scratches. “I wonder how much Cannonlestia would feel about dealing with a male alicorn, hmm?” Just as he said that, Composite Sombra flew off into the distance, now resembling Sombra at home. I kinda felt bad for the dude. I felt bad for Celestia. It took everything in my power to not break away and comfort her. “Oh! I know!” Discord picked me up and walked towards the portal that was now closing. “Go, enjoy the view! Painted hills, colored skies, a wondrous view that simply strikes the heart!” He threw me into it since I couldn’t really do much; I was getting a belly rub.

“FUUUUUCK YOOOOU DISSSSCORDDD!” I shouted as I trailed behind Prime Celestia.

I never even got to finish the Python Based Portal Spell.

---

Thud.

“Fucking hell, man,” I grumbled… THERE IS FUCKING GLASS IN MY SHOULDER.

“...So I guess we have that now,” Twilight, Prime Twilight said. “A male alicorn.”

“Fuckin’ hell!” I yanked the glass out of my shoulder and started healing it. As I did that I slowly realized something important. “Uh…” My horn lit and my wings were hidden. “Please don’t hurt me, I already hurt myself.” I gestured to the nicely sized hole in my left shoulder because a piece of glass got stuck in it. Luckily, after I took the glass out, I healed it. So I wasn’t bleeding out.

Twilight started eying me as did the rest of her friends. “I believe… I have some questions for you.”

I slowly looked at the piece of glass in my magic, it was still floating there. Now Source, you have Celly and Button to make it home to. You do not want to die. You shouldn’t kill yourself. Source, stop. You could go home and find a way to introduce your mother to Celly. You need to see Button graduate. You need to watch your kid get married and cry when you realize just how fast he’s grown. I sighed, and took a deep breath before putting the glass down.

“Aight, what do you want to discuss?” I asked, unhiding my wings.

I better be able to find my way home after this.

Author's Note:

And thus, Source made his way into the Cannon Timeline... Oh boy.

Comments

[Prince Jules Moonshade]

Oh boy indeed

[Totally Not A Pony]

And thus, Source made his way into the Cannon Timeline... Oh boy.

So...the Tchaikovsky timeline, then?

[f0st3r21]

I wonder when in Canon he has arrived.

[FoxyLove]

Discord may earn himself a Level 50 @$$whooping if he keeps doing a Slider/Quantum Leap scenario to Source Code. He just wants to go home to his family.

[FoxyLove]

11941682
Then he'll need Huey Lewis & the News to Gotta Get Back in Time!!!

[Aiwhisper]

Poor Cody hopping all over.

[Booster Spice]

Oh dear.

Source is now going to get a Canon Pinkie Party.

With the CMC.

Pinkie? that Hydra pinyata is a bit large?

Silly Source, that Hydra isnt for you, its for the Ursa Major.

[Greenhorn]

“Uh…” I hummed. “Source Code. I’m… a dimension hopper as it seems.”

Source can now add another title to his name.

[Luckyfanisaac]

“Apparently there's hundreds of alternate realities, I flew by a few dozen of them after some fuckwad named Discord tossed me in here after he rubbed my belly.

[tsaukpaetra]

Discord just isn't satisfied LMAO.

[Tomat]

oh shiiiieeeeeeet

Cody do be in the canon timeline fr fr

I will be looking respectfully with great interest

[Charlie120]

Man I felt that last part. Here's hoping Cannon™ has a therapist