Letter 94: Here.
I feel like to give actual advice I'd need a lot more reading under my belt about how to help people on the spectrum navigate conversations like this. I don't have much experience or training with that so... best I got. Feels a bit flat to me, but I'm also gonna try to get back into the habit of answering these sooner.
To my most faithful student, Twilight Sparkle,
At some point it became more polite to beg off with some weak excuse than to actually admit a lack of interest or willingness to participate in social events of whatever nature. As I have mentioned before, honesty is usually a better alternative in the long run especially when one has difficulty gauging the appropriateness of a lie.
I realize of course that other ponies may have been the ones to tell a 'little white lie' first, and you sometimes have difficulty differentiating between an actual problem and just a polite excuse, so perhaps I might offer a wayfaring rule: Ask once, if they decline for any given reason, express your wishes that they could attend, and ask if they might be interested some other time. If they express genuine regret that they'll have to miss or can't attend, then you may offer to reschedule or help them reschedule I suppose. If they simply express that it's unfortunate and that 'maybe next time' it may be better to assume that they aren't interested in that specific thing.
If you really can't tell, my faithful student, it is okay to simply ask. It may not be quite as 'polite' but I think it would be better in the long run if you are simply prepared to ask directly anyway. After all, it's meant to spare your feelings on the matter in the first place, when somepony else does it.
Your loving mentor,
Princess Celestia
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Most people with autism view things in a black/white way. Many times they take things very literally, sometimes to the point of absurdity. Most of the time, it is purely unintentional, but there will be the occasion when they are lucid enough of their tendencies (depending on the level of functioning) where they're able to troll you with them.
My source is that I am a person with autism, and I know several others with it of varying degrees of functionality.
9954531
I second this.
I also think this was some fairly decent advice for Twilight since she needs a new way to frame this sort of thing into context.
9954531
9954545
I third this. I have Asperger's Syndrome and I have a VERY hard time detecting sarcasm.
9954531
I have a brother like that. So many things sail over his head he may as well be a merman. Having grown up with him, his mindset has creeped into my own personality a bit as well. Or, I might have a bit, too. I don't know and I don't care as long as I can function in society well-enough to take care of myself. He can't... or he's unwilling because he knows someone else will do it for him. Or a bit of both.
9954531
I second this bit about trolling.
Source: myself who is a higher functioning Asparagus (Asperger’s Syndrome) who is a pedantic little sh*t on purpose.
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I have found my people.
Celestia made a typo? Le gasp! ()
9955754
Thanks! Fixed.
9954641
Oh really?