WTFIWWY-More Than Meets The Eye

This week's life lessons learned:

-Don't steal a tractor. Definitely don't steal one with the intent to go to a college campus to kill 2 people and then go on a vehicular rampage. GTA is not a LARP. Also: Great work in reinforcing that negative stereotype.

-People's Republic of China, you aren't fooling anyone by painting dogs black and white and trying to pass them off as giant pandas. I wonder if this is the same zoo where they tried to pass off a guy wearing a bear suit as a real bear?

-Drug smugglers can get creative, police, when someone uses a large statue depicting characters from a popular franchise, don't bring similar statues to your press event when showing off your big drug bust, that will inspire idiot to go to stores and smash open the statues looking for drugs. Also: Don't smuggle drugs. Drugs are bad. Mm-kay? Also-also: Those statues are not life sized.

-Don't steal a boat and take it on a joy ride. That's called grand larceny and when they arrest you, you will go to jail for a long time. Also: If you already have an ankle bracelet from a previous conviction, maybe you shouldn't crime for a while until the authorities take it off. Also: Great work in reinforcing that negative stereotype.

-An airplane is not a democracy, it is a dictatorship where the slightest infraction can get you expelled from it, potentially permanently, get put on a forever list and arrested when your feet hit the soil. If you've got beef with someone, wait until after the plane has reached its final destination, the pilot has docked, the doors have opened and everyone has disembarked to throw hands with the person/people. Also: Getting permanently banned from Spirit Airlines is, well...you done fucked up. Also-also: Great going in reinforcing that negative stereotype.

-If you have not bought a ticket to attend an event that is currently happening at that moment at the stadium/ballpark and you crash the gate with your car, the police may very well enlist the people working there using construction equipment to take down the stage of an event that is now over, they may very well enlist the people to use said equipment to aid them in disabling your car and you will get arrested and you will go to jail. Also: The people of Boston are savages, that counts doubly so for the Boston PD. But if you fuck with Fenway, you need to count yourself lucky that you aren't dead. Also-also: Great going in reinforcing that negative stereotype.