It has been a year since the Element's failure, and Nightmare Moon has not been seen. The pressure is finally weighing down on Equestria's new Chancellor, Twilight Sparkle. She still struggles with the events of that fateful night - the night the moon made its permanent place in the sky. After one fateful encounter, though, the course of Equestrian history shifts yet again as she begins to truly see this Nightmare. And maybe, just maybe, she and Nightmare Moon aren't so different.
A MoonLight fic with a twist.
And a bit of Twixie.
Etc.
Art by nikohl: http://nikohl.deviantart.com/
Chapters (3)
There's not enough MoonLight in this damn world
Anyways, I hope I didn't stray too far from normality here
nice job i liked (i wanted first post
)
Definitely seems interesting however I do not have the required amount of time to read at this moment so I shall be waiting for an opportunity to do just that.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Anyone with the title of Chancellor is not to be trusted.
I think I saw "then" put instead of "than" at one point, but that's all I can offer for criticism. It's definitely an intriguing start, I wanna see where it goes.
Hmm - I curse you for your lack of military knowledge, but praise you for much of the rest of the fic.
However, there is one point I must raise - AJ's farm. You say it is failing because the spell is causing the apples to grow wrong, causing ponies to stop buying them. The problem is, ponies still need to eat, and this spell, if it causes the apples to taste wrong, quite likely causes _all_ vegetable matter to taste wrong as well. Obviously, there will have been a resultant shift to animal products (milk,cheese, yoghurt and the like), but even in the course of a year, these industries will not have grown sufficiently to steal a controlling share of the food market, let alone gain enough of a stranglehold to close down Ponyville's _sole_ apple supplier.
So... yeah. Whilst it is likely AJ will have incurred minor losses, unless for some reason apples are the only produce affected by this foul taste, or if the apples have also lost their nutritional value, there is no reason why the farm should be going out of business - after all, where else are ponies going to buy food from?
One thing: Twilight's had to carry the burden of Equestria on her shoulders, a task she isn't exactly prepared for. A year can weigh on nyone, and I wouldn't call her OOC, I'd call it character development. That may just be me, though.
Is Twilight shipped with Luna? I ask because it was added to the group for that ship and I want to know if it should stay or not.
(can PM me if it would spoil something)
Hmm. Well, I'm not a huge fan of dark fics, but... So far this is something I'd continue to read.
The question is where the story will go, but you can never know until its finished. Author's rarely tell before its over... And where would be the fun if they did I guess.
Trixie in collar? Well, I hope she'll KICK Twilight's ass for that. Seriously! Enslaving Trixie and lashing her countless times? She must pay for that.
483913
That's probably her punishment for the Ursa incident. I say Trixie got off lightly.
486688
Snips and Snails is guilty for that incident. Trixie did not brought him.
486715
If I'm understanding that sentence correctly, then I agree. Snips and Snails are to blame for the Ursa, not Trixie. HOWEVER... Nope, I still can't justify whipping a pony.
487212
Exactly. Not just whipping once, but many times.
>Her cutie mark was sliced up, lines and lines missing due to pale reminders of countless lashings.
What the fuck is this! Oh, poor Twilight, our poor dictator, everypony blames her... GUESS WHY, BITCH, MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'RE TYRANNICAL SHIT!
487222
Now now, I haven't read it yet. AND WATCH YOUR DAMN MOUTH! That's my favourite pony you're "talking to"! And nobody calls anypony a bitch. I hate that word.
Joking aside, seriously, no bitch being applied to ponies, please.
482498 agreed nighttime needs to be longer
This story branches off from the canon continuity when the fight against Nightmare Moon turns out differently, I gather? Well, then it stands to reason that the Ursa incident may also have played out differently from the one we've seen. In fact, I think we already know it did because right here in this chapter we have Twilight remembering bringing in her guards to deal with it -- no putting the baby to sleep and sending it home to mommy in this timeline, apparently, and she may not even have been in Ponyville in person when everything happened.
So it's not altogether unreasonable to think that in this storyline Trixie may in fact have caused it after all...and if not that, then at least that Twilight blames her for it anyway. We'd need more data to say for sure one way or the other.
483219 Well thanks. And yep. I see the plothole now. It shouldn't be too much of a problem though. Thanks for pointing it out anyways.
483658 I agree, but I'm sure others would disagree, so I figured I'd say something anyways.
488889 Indeed it does. Good analysis!
i have a question how long till update first 5 minuts of waiting and already want moar
. anyway good story sofar i hope trixy chokes on her own blood.
My favorite shipping, thank god for another one of these stories, I started to think they were damn near dead. So by the looks of it, the fight is pretty even right now, so I'm looking forward to the next chapter, I thought this was an amazing story so far.
494761 The next update? Hmm...three hours.
Though can I ask, will you be updating The Night's Return anytime soon? I rather liked that story, shame to see it on hiatus.
494879 I agree, there's just not enough of them around. And thank you
502980
Yeah, the only reason its on hiatus is because I broke my arm (I actually made a post about it) I should be writing another chapter by May. Then after I'm done, I'm doing a complete re-write of it to fix alot of things.
Nice, will track. An interesting start to a moonlight fic.
btw Twi sounds like Lesson Zero raised to the nth.
I enjoyed this chapter, really well written. Definitely getting the feel of good intentions gone wrong in regards to Twilight's governing style.
I like night!
I like night!
P.S. vote for the campaign "to prevent abuse trixie"
503740 indeed! aparently twilight went way too far on the sparkle mandate. now her friends have started to betray her. great scot now i cant wait for moar?
should've known better.
So the rest of the mane 6 betrayed Twilight and joined Nightmare Moon. Poor Twilight she's not going to take that well. And I think Twilight really trying her best too.
play with fire its good OH MY GOD I SPILT THE GASOLINE!!!
but realy keep playing with fire to many fics are like th old ones now days
this is one fire i want to see create something new, instead it destroying.
This...
Suddenly got VERY interesting...
Really looking forward to updates!
503495 Well I can't wait for the next chapter. Definitely a good fic you've got.
The governmental stuff is actually pretty hard to create 
thanks for letting me know I'm on the right track.
503740 505319 Thanks
506898 You know, one of my thoughts on this story before I posted it was that it would draw ire from many readers. Glad to see that's not the case
503588 Thanks. I actually plan to elaborate on that, but shhhh...it's a secret
503853 You've got my vote. I'll be honest, I love Trixie, so it pains me to write these things about her. But hey, I'm here to deliver a story, not lie
Will Spike be getting any role in this?
Or did I simply strait up miss him?
514114 He will, but not a major one. To be honest, I don't really like spike
i cant wate till twi's next interaction with nmm.
Euch... No I don't know if I should continue to read, after that author's note.
Anyway, "“No, no. Here, take her,” she said, bumping the mare away. “She said her brother’s in the guard. I can only assume he’s in here. I want you - only you, not you two - to take her and -->fine<-- this colt.”"
Bit of a nasty character, Twilight... Fining her guard because he has the audacity to get injured on duty and be in the infirmary ward. Interesting typo :P
552252 Haha oops. Thanks for pointing that out
Also, what about the author's note turns you away?
552310
The warning about the dark tag. I mean, it was there when I started reading it, but people handle that tag differently... And people who feel the need to warn about it usually take it a bit further.
552316 Ah. Well like I said, no gore or anything of the sort. I actually don't plan to get overly dark, but even still, there's a bit more to come. Nothing mind racking, I don't think.
How is something with a princess (Luna) ruling a republic , never got that other then that people started it for fun.
oh and good fic, got me hooked.
Golden eyes huh, wonder what happened.
552323
I'm basically wondering now, "Are ponies going to die?" Which of course you can't answer without spoiling... Well, its not as I I haven't read any fics in which that has happened, but... I just never like it when it does. *Shrugs*
552332 Actually, I don't think it's spoiling to say that I too dislike pony death
483117 Unlesss it's chancellor Puddingheadddd~!
I have the sneaking suspicion that NMM and Trixie have switched bodies. It makes sense to me. NMM's weakness during the invasion, the mysterious disappearance of Trixie, and now the sudden amnesia leads me to that conclusion. NMM is laying dormant in Trixie's body while Trixie herself is trapped in NMM's less-then-usable body.
Tiss fun to speculate. Tracked and all that fun stuff.
ill proof read granted youll still want someone else to do a better job then me ill mainly just be giveing you my opnions and checking spelling
552593 Agreed
553006 Thanks for the offer. Is there some way I can get the chapters to you?
552858 It is
Hey, I have the sneaking suspicion that I've seen you somewhere before
And this one goes out to all the dislikes. In the great words of Captain Jack Sparrow, Stop blowin' holes in my ship!
590811 also Dr.Jekyll is the maker(or admin) of a twilight sparkle group that is quite big
More please! Moar!
i3.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/574/moar-cat.jpg but seriousely moar of this elixer please.
that is ... if you want to.