Rainbow Dash7,261 stories ·4,146 members
Twilight's Library6,262 stories ·4,833 members
This is an idea that wouldn't leave my head, inspired by Fairy Slayer's "Mommy Nearest," Aldea Donder's "Alicorn," SoundofRainfall's "Play" and RainbowDoubleDash's "Lunaverse"
Alternate Universe: Instead of Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia made Rainbow Dash her personal student instead! Follow her through the events of the 1,000th Summer Sun Celebration. A reimagining of "Friendship is Magic"
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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“Oh wow! Maybe I’ll even get to a have a Cutie Markvitzvah too! Sweet!” that made me chuckle.
A good start if you wanted to continue, however, this would be pretty good as a one-shot.
Rainbow Dash studying under Celestia....
I wonder how that'd play out.
Not bad.
And if not Twilight, definitely Rainbow Dash. She is kind of the plot device that is responsible for the entire show. Awesome indeed. Willing to give this a track, the premise took me by surprise.
...And Dash would be a better student anyways. I always got the feeling Twi kind of takes Celestia for granted. Whereas Dash is literally Loyalty.
well my interest is sparked if only for two reasons;
-seeing how RBD and Celestia work as protoge and mentor
-seeing where twilight is in all this
So go ahead, why not continue.
The idea is cute, and I liked the story well enough. It works as a one-shot, but if you feel like continuing, go ahead.
However, there are two things I'd like to point out:
1) Create a description. What you have up there right now belongs on either the blog or the comments section. That one short paragraph is like the cover of a book or movie; it's what gets the audience interested in giving the work an actual look. Simply saying that you're just "testing the waters" and throwing out a bunch of other stories that inspired this one is not going to hook readers in.
2) This is more of a personal pet peeve, but double space your paragraphs. It just looks like a big blob of text to me otherwise.
Besides that, good job.
You should continue with this.
Interesting so far. I'll see how this goes.
I would love to read more!
hmmn. Instead of Twilight being Celestia's Protogé, We have the element of Loyalty having unquestionable command over the rest of the elements. Interesting.
Really nice! I'm interested to see how this is going to turn out.
This is a very interesting idea and and I would love to see more.
Oooh, this is really cute. I'd love it if you continued it! Um, only if you want to, of course. Nice job, and a very interesting idea
Why does this work so well
Still great, looking forward for the next chapter
Rainbow Dash is best student
Poor Dashie, she's a better pony than those stuck up snobs will ever be, but on the bright side at least Tiffany won't need to to worry about
using the wrong cutlery considering she will more than likely have to eat her food through a straw for the rest of her life.
I can't help but be a tad concerned about Twilight in this timeline. Did she at least make it into CSGU, or is she a complete shut-in at this point?
I do love the relationship presented that has developed between Dash and Shining Armor.
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My sentiments exactly.
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You'll have to wait and see!
From my experience, straight incarnations of Dashie are few and far between, but nearly always good. Her crush on Shining Armour is cute.
Interesting idea mate. Everyone's in character and acting exactly how one could expect them to in this situation, but it doesn't seem like Dashie's connection to Celes is doing anything for her. Heh, honestly seems as if the population consists primarily of unicorns with their own heads shoved up their arses so they probably look at her with distain for "merely" being a pegasus. Must be painful considering the horns. I assume Twilight managed to get her magic under control herself? If she did, the examiners'd have literally no choice but to accept her.
Can't help but wonder how fighting Nightmare'll go. Guessing she won't even consider joining the shadowbolts. Perhaps her trial will be switched for something that involves massive amounts of magic and her unwavering loyalty's only revealed at the end? Relationship with Celes could alter other scenarios as well, such as the Lesson Zero scenario. And... wait a sec. I assume she bought/made her cloud castle herself, so where's she gonna stay if Twilight ends up in the library?
Good work mate, keep it up.
while i do like the concept, the ''what if RD instead of Twilight'' but RD seams to know very little for being her student for THAT long. i mean for instance she would receive flight training from the great flight instructors ever and stuff like that.
also kinda really cliche so in other words corn
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4gmnbyXte1r8yqpgo1_1280.png
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Thank you! Good observations, good questions. However, I wouldn't assume too much about Rainbow Dash and Celestia's relationship based on the experience of one night. Imagine if someone walked in on you and your family on one incident where you were having a horrible fight and thought that was the norm. You will see more of Dash and Celestia's relationship and the different sides of it as the story progresses.
There's a lot of differences that I see being posed between having Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle as Celestia's student that I wanted to explore. To name just one: even as a filly Twilight was knowledge oriented and asocial. For her, being Celestia's student was a godsend. Rainbow Dash, in my story, was thrilled to have Celestia be her mentor too, but unlike Twilight she isn't interested in knowledge for knowledge's sake. She has something very specific she wants to get out of it: becoming a great flier and joining the Wonderbolts. As much as being Celestia's student is good for her, that is what she wants more than anything and her lack of success on this front is frustrating in the extreme for her. Likewise, Celestia sees potential in Rainbow Dash, just as in the series she saw it in Twilight, but she also has something she wants to get out of Dash and it's not exactly what Rainbow Dash had in mind, hence the tension that crops up.
Thanks for your review! I hope you keep reading!
704359 Ah, I made a mistake. I meant her relationship wasn't doing anything for the other's opinion of her and that, well, they still view her as unworthy simply because of her heritage in both species and social standing. Though we have no idea what happened to her parents. It's obvious that Celes cares for her and vice-versa, but understandable that Dashie's not the best academically considering she's just not interested in it. Hard for an individual to be motivated by something that doesn't. ... Also curious how she'll react to re-meeting Fluttershy and being introduced to the rest of the Mane 6. Also wonder who's the main weather-pony if she never lived there... gonna stop now.
Don't worry mate, I tend to keep reading the really good fics. Two things I forgot to mention;
1: it's always easier when the story actually has good grammar, kudos on that.
2: My heart melted when I saw the cover picture.
Thinking about what Asterisks said, we don't know for sure that she hasn't. Hell, maybe Celes used that as a motivation for studying.
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...You really are hitting on all the good questions. All I can say without giving anything away is to keep reading!
..Who or what is Asterisks?
704422 Thanks mate. I like to keep an open mind to cover all posibilities. Hasn't worked so far, but it's still fun.
By Asterisks I meant *Rainbow Dash*. Figured calling him/her Rainbow Dash'd get a bit annoying/confusing so I called him what surrounds the name.
I'm also slightly terrified that her weather managing position went to Derpy.
I can almost see the papers focusing on "Celestia's student disappears" and giving details. Then her finding out about the Summer Sun Celebration and... really not understand what all the fuss is about. "Celestia just raises the sun, she does that every day." Not in that order, but She'd probably've asked the question to Celes herself. Also not sure how the alicorn'll react to her leaving or if Twilight ever found out about Nightmare Moons return. Different timeline and all. Ran out of questions, but each chapter just raises more. Leaves me with more variables to draw multiple conclusions from. Also surprised how regularly this updates, but not complaining by any means.
I assume Pinkie was gonna warn her;
A: That Pinkie's more hyper than Dashie after drinking a years supply of coffee
B: That Pinkie will react strangely and throw a surprise welcome party.
Was thinking about putting a joke regarding an infamous story, but it was a lousy idea.
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All I can say is wait and see. XD
706531 *Shrugs* Good enough for me, I've had enough spoilers to last a lifetime and it's more enjoyable if I have no idea what's gonna happen.
But even more questions arise. Are the elements of magic and Loyalty gonna change forms? Would Celes send a search party or prefer to search by herself? Either way she ain't gonna be happy... or will she find them after Nightmare's reverted? Is that when they'll find out she's Celes' protege? Has the alicorn taught her the Mare in the Moon story so she'll remember the EOH when the time comes?
Too many variables! I love this!
Why do people associate rainbows with homosexuality?
I can deal with a saddening lack of AppleDash in this otherwise amazing story.
Keep up the great work!
706489
Even IF Twilight does somehow find the same book, and reads the same story, how exactly is she going to go about saving Equestia?
"Twilight, you know I would really like it if you'd make some friends. This is exactly why."
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707685
Okay, what you just posted there? THAT is freaking hilarious.
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Heh! I love a good shipping story (when they're done right) be it AppleDash or other, but considering this is a retelling of the first two episodes I just didn't think it was really appropriate or even needed.
Plus I liked playing with the assumption that Dash is gay simply because every author ships her with everypony...and everyone..and in a few cases, everyTHING.
707685 *Shrugs* I dunno, if she does maybe a teacher'll alert Celes of an extremely anti-social yet magically gifted student flipping out over a "myth", Celes thinks there might be a slight possibility of her being an element perhaps? Just coming up with possible theories mate.
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Close but you're way off. XD
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To be honest, I have no idea why Celestia wouldn't at least be aware of the filly who practically blew up an entire building during an entrance exam, turned her parents into houseplants, and super aged a dragon wyrmling into a more or less fully grown individual. At the very least she should be keeping an eye on Twilight as a possible candidate for the position of Magic, maybe trying to see if she can manipulate her and Rainbow Dash into becoming friends somehow. She probably also agents scouring Equestia looking for possible candidates for the rest of the positions.
Ahh, Rainbow Dash, always awesome.
Good stuff, again. Can't wait to see how Pinkie Pie reacts, and how the others will get introduced. Especially Twilight, though I think the answer to that one would be that she was becoming so introverted her parents and brother talked her into moving away for a while for a change of pace. She found the live-in Library job open in Ponyville and fell in love with the idea of running her own library and has been there for a few years, now.
At least, that's my guess. Dunno how or even IF Spike can be around, but we'll see, I'm sure. Just write some more, man, and git 'r done.
D'awwwwwww
She was aware of the stairs she was getting from some of the townsponies
I can totally see Pinkie running up and giving Rainbow Dash a staircase as a welcoming gift.
Not so sure about the rest of Ponyville, though.
711613
Fixed. Thanks
Rainbow Dash doesn't like to dress in style.
Also, Ditzy being a flight instructor? oh christ
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More like a junior counselor.
My logic is that Dash and Derpy know each other. You can kinda infer that from their discussion in "The Last Roundup." Dash was annoyed with her but it was the kind of frustration/annoyance that she sometimes gets with Pinkie Pie or Fluttershy. She isn't trying to be mean, she's just...irritated. All things considered, Dash seemed to try to restrain just how annoyed she was with Derpy. If she didn't like her she could have been a lot blunter and meaner. So my theory is that they're friendly, if not 'friend' friends. And given Dinky, I imagine Ditzy would have to be a older than Dash, if only a bit. So there's my explanation of how they know each other.
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I got that feeling too. And really, it seems like all the Pegasi in general know each other relatively well.
Oh my goodness, my chest aches at all the d'aaawwwwwHRRRRNNNNG. *Thump*
Wonder how Fluttershy gets introduced? After all, she and dash know each other, at least from flight camp. And I'm still curious to see if I guessed with with Twilight.
Ah well, that just means you nee to write more.
Somehow, this is gonna be awesome.
Dinky is adorable in this, and you should be proud of it. Cute like that is hard to write--take it from someone who's been trying for the better part of a semester.
Twilight sighting!
Aww, this totally ruins the joke I was going to write in my review.
"Celestia was always busy, always distracted and whenever they had time together she seemed to want to focus on Dash’s studies instead of training; logic problems, ancient lore, problem solving or social skills with the brats of nobility."
Well that ancient lore is going to save your flank one day Rainbow. Logic puzzles too maybe.
What luck. All six just happen to turn up at a party that one of them wasn't even invited to.
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It's a Pinkie Pie party. I don't think its POSSIBLE to gate crash one of those since she invites everypony.
were is spike?