Her Inner Demons
Her Inner Demons
"I don't get it," Sunny Flare said.
"Not sure I understand you," Indigo Zap looked pointedly at her classmate and fellow Shadowbolt.
"You are being extremely vague right now, which prevents us from understanding what is it that you fail to understand," Sugarcoat added in her trademark blunt manner.
"Aw, it's fine, girls," Sour Sweet joined the conversation, her voice saccharine sweet, "it's her usual thinking face... which reminds me of constipations," she finished with an unpleasant tone, earning herself a glare from Sunny and others for bringing up the topic one is not supposed to talk about when someone is eating.
"Oh yeah!" Lemon Zest butted in unexpectedly. Looking at her bobbing her head with her headphones in their usual place, other girls concluded that her remark had nothing to do with them talking.
The Shadowbolts were sitting in the cafeteria of Crystal Prep Academy, enjoying their lunch before a new round of lessons started. No one else was sitting at the same table besides them, allowing them a certain amout of privacy (as much as one could get in a public eating place) and a possibility to discuss something not related to school curriculum.
Today, this something not related to school curriculum was...
"Twilight Sparkle," Sunny Flare spoke up.
"Could you be more specific?" Sugarcoat spoke again.
"Well, Twilight and... the last event of the Friendship Games."
"The one where she turned into a power-crazed maniac bent on destroying this world just to get more magic from the other one?"
"Precisely."
An uncomfortable silence hung over their table. Knowing that they themselves had a part in that very thing happening still weighed heavily on the consciousness of everyone present. Siccing their classmate to release the anomalous energy, simply dubbed as "magic", that she had contained within a self-made device, had nearly resulted in a catastrophic sequences for both them and students of Canterlot High, if not the whole world. For some students it could even have been fatal.
In retrospect, everyone of them agreed that it was the most stupid thing they have ever done, and since no one of them liked feeling stupid, they decided to be more careful from then on.
Ironically, if not for Twilight Sparkle turning into a she-demon, the rivalry between Canterlot High School and Crystal Prep Academy would not have subsided at all. But once some students of CHS risked their lives to save some of Crystal Preppers from falling into a dimensional rift and to their deaths, and Shadowbolts returned the favour, both groups became united in putting the blame on Principal Abacus Cinch, who was blackmailing Twilight and was just as guilty in her demonic transformation (if not more so) as Shadowbolts themselves, all for preserving her precious reputation.
And once Principal Celestia declared both groups winners, the tensions between schools became less pronounced.
Of course, there was still some competitiveness between two schools. Canterlot High was slowly creeping up in the ratings, already overtaking some privately owned schools and getting closer to Crystal Prep. Some students still challenged each other, but it was done in a more friendly way. And not everyone from CHS forgot about their losing streak, as well as some CPA students did not forget about their winning one.
But everyone was still getting along better; especially once Pinkie Pie threw another party of her own in CHS gym.
"Speaking of Twilight," Indigo Zap spoke again, "has anyone heard from her?"
"Her transfer papers have been finalized," Sunny Flare answered. "Principal Cinch was not amused about it, but she did not have any legal ground to prevent that from happening. Sure, her parents didn't get the refund, as per the terms of contract, but once Twilight Velvet and Night Light - that's her Mom and Dad, respectively - were assured that Twilight did not want to be here anymore, and that those girls at CHS were making her very happy, they did not care in the slightest."
"I only hope that Shining Armor doesn't find out the true reason," Sour Sweet interjected. "Because if he does, we're all screwed!"
No one wanted to comment on that. Everyone knew how protective Shining Armor was of Twilight. She only needed to drop a word to her Big Brother Best Friend Forever and woe betide anyone caught in his wrath.
"That said, you mentioned you didn't understand something about her," Sugarcoat returned the conversation back on track.
"Oh yeah, thanks for reminding, Sugarcoat. Yes, there is one thing."
Everyone, even Lemon Zest, leaned forward to listen.
"Why did Twilight turn into that demoness?"
Everyone looked between themselves, eyes widened a bit.
"Alright..." Indigo spoke, "I didn't expect that."
"Seriously?!" Sunny rounded on her. "None of you were shocked in the slightest?"
"Um..." no one managed to find a good answer.
"Ugh!" Sunny facepalmed. "Fine. Let me tell you something in detail. I had talked with Sunset Shimmer a bit. Remember her mentioning how she had made the same mistake as Twilight? Well, I was curious and asked her about that. And she revealed something."
Every other girl looked at her, urging to tell more. Indigo Zap even tapped her foot as a sign of impatience.
"Earlier, almost a year ago, Sunset was not the person she is now. In fact, she was a total opposite. She was primarily concerned with having power and becoming the top student in the food chain, and once she did achieve that position, she did everything to maintain her status quo. And her methods were... not unlike some of more brutal Crystal Preppers would have used. Blackmail, taking embarrassing photos and videos and then posting them on the Internet - she did all of that. Moreover, she told me she did everything to disorganize any possible resistance, isolating student groups from each other and even going as far as breaking the circle of friends she actually hangs around with now."
"You're joshing me," Indigo spoke up.
"No. I asked her other friends via MyStable and they confirmed the story."
"Well shucks. She would have made a fine Crystal Prepper with such qualities, that's for sure. Provided she found a way to circumvent the influence of the richer ones."
"How come she did a turn-around, then?" Sugarcoat raised an eyebrow.
"The story goes on into a weirder area, but it's not too... implausible, given what we had seen. Remember the dimensional rifts? It appears they led to a land where Sunset Shimmer actually came from, and more than that, apparently each human here has a counterpart there, in a form of ponies. We did not hallucinate when we saw them in the dimensional rifts. Twilight's pony counterpart came to this world in order to retrieve an artifact that Sunset had stolen but managed to lose, and stumbled onto that very group, which by chance consisted of her friends' counterparts. She managed to mend the bridges between them, but Shimmer got her hands on the artifact and tried using it as she had wanted to. However, it led to her becoming a she-demon herself. Twilight and the others defeated her with their own magic of friendship, and this allowed her to step onto the path of redemption."
"Ooh, it sounds like a fairy tale," Sour Sweet spoke up. "Except that fairy tales don't happen in real life!"
"And then they accepted Shimmer as a friend?" Indigo Zap asked again.
"Well, they had rough patches, but yes, they eventually did, and even other students at CHS have apparently forgiven her," Sunny Flare intertwined her fingers. "However, this is Sunset Shimmer we were just talking about. Given the type of person she had been before, I don't find it implausible that her interaction with magic would result in her gaining a demonic form. But..."
"This doesn't explain why Twilight Sparkle of all people turned into a she-demon since she has never been as callous or ruthless or manipulative as Sunset Simmer had been," Sugarcoat interrupted.
"You hit the proverbial nail, Sugarcoat. It doesn't."
Each and every Shadowbolt sitting at the table instantly gained a thinking expression.
Before they could ponder too much on it, however, Indigo Zap looked on her watch and gasped.
"Girls, the break's almost over! Finish your food and we'll talk about it later!"
"So, any ideas?" Sugarcoat inquired, as the Shadow Five (as someone had nicknamed them) made their way off Crystal Prep premises.
"On what? The reasons behind Twilight going all dark and demonic?" Lemon Zest replied.
"Precisely."
"I have thought a bit, and I have come to one conclusion..."
"Oh, how nice! Except that I don't think it's gonna be useful!" Sour Sweet began sweetly and ended sourly, as usual.
"...the reason is... magic!"
Everyone stared at the rocker girl. A shell-shocking silence hang in the air between them.
"It appears that when you said "a bit", you literally meant "a bit", Lemon," Sugarcoat said in her usual flat tone.
"Duh! Of course I did!" Lemon grinned widely.
Every other girl felt an impulse to facepalm at the acid-haired girl's antics, but old instincts flared up and they held their urges in check. Sour Sweet had a vindicated expression on her face.
"Anyone else aside from Lemon Zest?" Sugarcoat continued.
A chorus of "no" and "nuh-uh" answered her.
"Totally no idea," Indigo Zap said.
"I can't come to a definite conclusion," Sunny Flare replied.
"Twilight was a lot nicer than Sunset... albeit a doormat... and so I have no idea!" Sour Sweet finished. Everyone looked at Sugarcoat.
"I have failed to find a logical answer to that, too. I suggest we try and gather additional data."
"Where?" Sunny inquired.
"From Twilight herself."
"Are you nuts?" Indigo almost dropped her jaw. "I'm no expert, but holy guacamole, that's kinda too blunt, even for you, Sugarcoat."
"Do you have an alternative source in mind?"
"Well, can't we ask those Rainbooms?"
"Aside from Sunset Shimmer, no one has had an experience similar to Twilight's, and even Shimmer herself could not explain the reason, correct?" at the latest words, Sugarcoat turned to Sunny Flare.
"Well... yeah, once Sunset told me her own story, I asked her about that, and she said she had no definite idea. Still, I'm not sure that approaching Twilight directly is a good idea. Maybe we should speak with other Rainbooms first?"
"Where and how?"
"They go to the place called Sugarcube Corner after school, as far as I know. Maybe we can find them there?"
"All in favour of going to Sugarcube Corner?"
Everyone nodded.
"Good," Sugarcoat said, "now let's go uncover this mystery."
"Is it just me or I am seeing two Twilights in there?" Sunny Flare was dangerously close to losing her jaw, but no Crystal Prepper had been caught in such a position previously (in public, at least), and she was not about to start.
"I see them, too," Indigo Zap scratched her head.
"No one slipped hallucinogenic drugs into our food, right?" Lemon Zest spoke up.
"This would be a punishable offence, and besides, the chances of us suffering the same hallucination would have been minimal," Sugarcoat deadpanned.
"Oh it's so nice to know, Sugarcoat... but it doesn't explain why there are two Twilights!" Sour Sweet finished the exchange.
"Uh... hi, girls?" Twilight (the one in glasses and Crystal Prep uniform) spoke up and waved, unsurely. The Rainbooms and other Twilight, who was dressed in light-blue blouse and a violet skirt along with high boots of similar colour stared at the Shadowbolts, puzzled.
"Hello, Twilight," Sugarcoat answered her. "How do you do?"
"Fine, thanks, I guess... what about you girls?"
"We are fine, too..."
"Oh yeah!" Lemon Zest bobbed her head at some sound ringing from her headphones.
"...case in point. Also, the second Twilight here - is she..?"
"Yes, I am Twilight's counterpart from an alternate world - or "out of town", as we call it around others," the Twilight in a blouse and a skirt spoke up.
"Meet Her Highness, Princess of Friendship, Twilight Sparkle," Sunset Shimmer spoke up. "Twilight, meet Indigo Zap, Sour Sweet, Sugarcoat, Sunny Flare and Lemon Zest," everyone of the Shadowbolts nodded, and Lemon waved instead, "the students of Crystal Prep Academy and until recently, our rivals at Friendship Games."
"I'm still baffled at how similar things in our world can be so different," Princess Twilight muttered. "In Equestria, we have a Crystal Empire, and it's not a rival of any means, and it's ruled by Princess Cadence..."
"Wait," human Twilight interrupted, wide-eyed, "Dean Cadence is a Princess there?"
All other Shadowbolts also were surprised, and now listened with attention.
"Yes, and she also was my foalsitter, or how you call it here... childsitter?"
"Babysitter."
"Oh. Right. And I can't recall hearing about anyone named Abacus Cinch back there..."
"Talk about multiverse theory," Sunny Flare muttered. "Weird does not even do it justice."
"So, you are a Princess..." Sugarcoat addressed Princess Twilight, "Do we need to bow, or call you "Your Highness", or follow some other etiquette?"
"It's not necessary," Twilight blushed a bit, "my title extends only to my world, and even then, I'm not that inclined on ceremonial greetings and stuff. Just call me Twilight."
"Then how are we to stop confusing you two?"
The question hung in the air as everyone fell silent at Sugarcoat's legitimate question.
"Oh! Oh!" Pinkie Pie, the ever energetic pink-haired and pink-skinned girl who could give Lemon Zest a run for her money in "fun" department, exclaimed cheerfully, "maybe we can give nicknames! Oooh, I have already made up nicknames! We'll call pony Twilight Magi-Twi, and this world's Twilight will be Sci-Twi!" the party girl finished her sentence with a face-splitting grin and a "squee" sound.
Twelve pairs of eyes gave the party girl blank looks.
"On second thought..." pony Twilight spoke quietly, "...just call me Princess."
Everyone agreed with a "mm-hmm" of their own.
"Ahem... not to sound unfriendly," Sunset spoke up, "but your appearance was... unanticipated."
"It was a spur of the moment decision," Sunny Flare agreed. "We wanted to ask a couple of questions, although I'm not sure now's the right time."
"What kind of questions?" Applejack inquired. Sunset's face showed that she already guessed what kind of questions the Shadowbolts had in mind.
"Questions about Twilight... our Twilight, that is."
I knew it, Sunset thought. "Is this related to the talk I had had with you earlier, Sunny?"
"Directly," Sugarcoat interjected.
"What talk?" human Twilight asked. Sunset sighed and laid it out:
"Sunny Flare was... perplexed as to why you had turned into... your corrupted form after unleashing the magic from your device. She heard that I had had a similar experience, and asked me about it. I told her everything about what kind of person I used to be, and then she asked me about your own transformation... but I failed to provide the answer."
"You see, Twilight," Sunny Flare took over, "when compared to Sunset Shimmer before her turn-around, you never came across as... well..."
"Villain-y?" Pinkie interjected. Every Shadowbolt stared at her perplexed, until Lemon Zest emitted a laugh.
"Ha ha, good one, Pinkie!"
Everyone gave her a "Seriously?" look, which she promptly ignored. Sunny sighed and continued:
"Yes, to borrow Pinkie Pie's grammatically-not-so-correct word, villain-y. You have never bullied, belittled, blackmailed or tormented anyone; in fact, you were... on the opposite side, so to speak. You have always been an intelligent - very intelligent - but shy girl who never enjoyed the power struggle and never even tried to hinder one's progress. From what I have gathered, the magic somehow interacted negatively with Sunset and you in your respective transformations... and that doesn't make sense to me."
"Neither it does for me, to be honest," Princess Twilight spoke up. "Magic is very closely related to mind and personality, and whatever happens with its involvement is closely connected to intent as well as general personality. When Sunset put on the crown containing Element of Magic - a powerful arcane artifact - her main defining characteristic was lust for power, and in quest for power, she did various things that would not be approved of. And most importantly, she had no friends, seeing friendship as weakness. With no positive influence of friends, the Element of Magic amplified her negative parts to the max while almost fully suppressing the positive ones, giving her a demonic form."
Everyone, even human Twilight, greedily absorbed the information about magic.
"You," the Princess addressed her counterpart, "also lacked friends, and thought it would be better to be alone. While an important aspect, this by itself is not enough to result in such a consequence, and being a shy bookworm certainly does not warrant the demon form automatically. While you were obsessed with finding out about magic, you never sought to deliberately hurt anyone, which can't mark you as... villain-y enough. So there's a missing "x" in an equation..."
"...and you want me to provide it?" human Twilight turned to Shadowbolts. While no one gave a clear answer, she still saw the barely-masked curiousity in their eyes and cast down her head, which was not unnoticed by everyone else.
"Ladies," Rarity spoke in her prim and proper voice, "while curiousity is not a sin, I believe that such a request would surely be... insensitive."
"If Twilight doesn't want to talk about it, we won't pry further and we'll leave immediately," Sunny Flare raised one hand as a sign of sincerity.
"You'd better live up to that promise," Applejack spoke up with a country drawl that almost grated on Shadowbolts' ears (except Lemon's - her own ears were protected by headphones).
"Besides, didn't you pressure Twilight into releasing magic all in name of victory in Friendship Games?" Rainbow Dash pointed an accusing finger at the Crystal Preppers. The latter had the decency to look guilty and/or embarrassed.
"Girls..." Fluttershy spoke meekly, "let's not fight. You're making Twilight uncomfortable."
Indeed, human Twilight was hugging herself tight now, emotional torment visible on her face.
"Told you it would be too blunt, Sugarcoat," Indigo Zap whispered.
"I did not anticipate Twilight's presence here. The plans tend to be torn down by reality sometimes," Sugarcoat whispered back. Turning to the Rainbooms, she said, "Thank you for listening to us. We will abstain from further inquiries," and turned around, intending to leave.
"Wait!"
Everyone was surprised to see human Twilight say that.
"I... I wanted to admit this anyway. I think it's better that they hear about it too," the lavender-skinned girl said.
"Are you sure, darling?" Rarity spoke up.
"Pretty sure."
"Well, y'all heard the ladies," Applejack said. "So c'mon an' sit."
It took Shadowbolts a lot not to wince at the country girl's accent.
"Oh! Cool! Can we have a party later?" Pinkie jumped in place while sitting, which (according to all Crystal Prep girls) defied the laws of physics. They had experienced Pinkie's antics before (just how did the pink girl bake a cake with Mona Lisa portrait inside?!), but were still not used to it.
"We'll think about it later, thanks," Sour Sweet spoke up, and then whispered, "but if it ends up with me getting cavities or diabetes, I'm sending her the medical bill!"
If someone did hear her, they paid her no heed.
Ten minutes later...
"So none of you had believed that I would be capable of... being evil?" Human Twilight asked the Shadowbolts, receiving a plethora of "no" answers.
"Trust us, darling, it was quite a shock to us, too," Rarity spoke up.
"Especially since you were genuinely distressed earlier, when Sunset got angry at you," Fluttershy butted in, making the fiery-haired girl wince.
"Not one of my best moments," the latter muttered.
"I think Sunset overreacted partially because of unleashed magic putting others in danger and partially because of the very fact that Twilight's device was absorbing magic," Princess Twilight spoke. "For a unicorn in Equestria, magic is an essential part of life, and losing it for probably forever is a fate that any unicorn would consider worse than death."
"Sunset is a human now. Here we don't usually have magic," Sugarcoat pointed out.
"True, but old habits die hard, I think. I myself feel uncomfortable without being able to harness magic at will. I walked face-first into a door once because I was used to opening doors with magic."
The other girls failed to hide the mirth in their eyes, which Princess Twilight decided to ignore.
"Back to track," Sunny Flare spoke. "No, none of us believed you capable of that, Twilight. Was there something inside of you that could have influenced you negatively?"
Silence reigned for almost a minute, while human Twilight was self-searching for an answer.
"Yes," she finally answered.
"SPILL IT!" suddenly, Pinkie Pie's face was everything she could see, and she heard a clatter of her cup.
"There is nothing to spill; the cup is empty," Sugarcoat said.
Everyone stared at the spectacled girl in silence, before Pinkie slapped the blunt-as-an-axe hard on the shoulder and exclaimed:
"GOOD ONE, SUGARCOAT!"
Everybody at the table laughed.
"Wow, Sugarcoat told a joke!" Sour Sweet spoke, and then frowned. "The end of the world is coming; we're doomed!"
"That statement is a logical fallacy," both Twilights spoke at the same time, and then looked at each other. Everyone laughed again, with two "twins" being the last ones to join in.
"And people complain about my "in-your-face" antics," Indigo Zap grumbled. "How come Pinkie gets a free pass?"
"She is Pinkie Pie," Rainbow Dash answered. "There's no other answer. Believe me, we've tried to find another one; haven't succeeded."
"Hmpf. Fine. So, Twilight... your story?" the Crystal Prep athlete turned to her ex-classmate.
"Are you sure you want to hear it? It's... it doesn't really paint you in good lights," human Twilight mumbled, unsure.
"Do it. I think we had this coming."
"Well... OK."
Inhaling deeply, Twilight began her story...
"Unlike many people in Crystal Prep, I did not get there on money alone. I was noticed by Principal Cinch when I was participating in a local academic decathlon at my old school. Say what you will about her, but she has an eye for talent. On seeing my performance, where I beat even some of her students, she came up to my parents and offered them to consider sending me there, even offering a scholarship."
"Ah, I remember this program," Sunny Flare spoke. "A way for talents to make it to Crystal Prep if they don't have the necessary funds. There were quite a few of those."
"Yes. And my parents told her it would hang on my decision, since they believed me to be adult enough to make such a choice. I had a talk with Principal Cinch about facilities, curriculum, teachers, possibilities and so on, and in the end, I agreed. The decision was easy because I didn't feel happy at my old school. No one liked smart ones there, and I was ridiculed for my love of reading. The boys even called me four-eyes."
At this tidbit, Applejack and Rainbow Dash looked as if they wanted to beat the snot out of those boys.
"That's so totally not cool," the prismatic-haired girl said. "I mean, I'm not into... egghead-ish stuff either, but doing that is just... bad. Not to mention stupid. I had had to ask the smartest ones for help several times when my grades were a problem."
"I had hoped that I would be more accepted at Crystal Prep, that there would be more people like me there, what with excellent teachers and classrooms and all that jazz... alas, while my accomplishments were well-recognized by staff, my classmates didn't appreciate that at all. And no one wanted to be my friend, either. Instead, people started resenting me. I heard "teacher's pet" hurled at me more often than there are corn flakes in a bag."
The Shadowbolts looked embarrassed at that, having been party to those things before.
"What's worse," Twilight continued, "many started pushing me around. Fearing retribution (since I knew too well that crossing those with money had bad consequences), I withdrew into a shell of a meek, shy girl, and dedicated my efforts on advancing my knowledge. On hearing about Everton Independent Studies Program, I realized that that was my dream. I threw all my strength and intelligence into achieving it. And I applied as soon as I was eligible to."
Twilight paused to take a few sips of her milkshake, and continued:
"But before I was eligible, I had had to endure the scorn and hate of my classmates every day. Initially, I thought that would pass if they realized that I could be as good as them, and if I would make the school proud... yet months went on, I won one city academic contest after another, Crystal Prep became more prestigious than ever, and not a single smile or a slap on the back or even a "Good job, Twilight" followed," the girl's hands tightened around her glass as she relived her old feelings of bitterness once again, and her lips tightened into a thin line.
"The only recognition I got was from the school administration, including Principal Cinch. And since my achievements bolstered her school's reputation a lot, she allowed me some leeway, like a private lab. When I heard about anomalous energy at Canterlot High, it came quite in handy. Here was something unusual, something to challenge me for real. By that time, I had given up on my classmates - whom I privately started to call "classfoes" - and focused only on Everton. By that time, however, my emotional defenses had worn down."
Sighing, Twilight continued:
"I started to feel resentment in response for everything I got from my peers. And in that year, their treatment worsened, which only spurred on my resentment, and slowly started twisting it into anger. Each push or snide comment or a show of "superiority" fueled the anger, and... and soon, I began to hate my classmates."
*FLASHBACK*
Twilight looked down the hall, seeing Crystal Prep students standing and/or walking here and there as the school bell rang.
Only one corridor before she could be safe within her lab - but she felt as if that would be her longest walk possible. This particular corridor was packed with people that tended to look down on her, either for her grades or not being one of their own inner circle.
With a sigh, she went on, clinging her books to her chest as a shield.
Almost immediately, she was bumped by some girl with green hair tied in a ponytail.
"Excuse me," Twilight immediately apologized in her practiced voice. And, as usual, her feelings of resentment rose within her.
Jealous twit, still can't get over the head that I one-upped her at chemistry. She shouldn't have sneaked off with her boyfriend to make out instead of studying! Why blame me if I won fair and square?
Another bump from behind, a girl with light-violet hair and pursed lips.
"Sorry."
Stupid bimbo, she is on the verge of flunking out and she is still obsessed with her looks above everything else; she even went to plastic surgery clinic, succeeding only in making her face look like a mannequin. Even a mannequin would be smarter than her!
Using her refined evasion skills, she managed to avoid several collisions before another bump revealed Fleur Dis Lee as the culprit.
"Pardon me!" Twilight squeaked so as to put herself even lower in Fleur's eyes and to avoid escalation of the conflict. Fleur came from a rich family and had more than enough possibilities to mess with those who crossed her. The best student of CPA hated her more than others
Arrogant, self-centered, obnoxious bitch! Trotting around here like she owns the place, flaunting the riches of her family when she herself has done nothing! Money-for-brains, that one; I'd like to see how you'd scream if your family business went bankrupt tomorrow!
The door to her lab couldn't be close soon enough...
*END OF FLASHBACK*
"Ouch," Indigo Zap stared wide-eyed at her ex-classmate, "your mind didn't pull punches."
"And I cannot even disagree with it," Sugarcoat commented. "Insults aside, you managed to characterize them pretty well, Twilight."
"You do realize that we also were potential targets of her then-vicious mind?" Sour Sweet reminded.
"The word "potential" is the odd one here, Sour," Twilight spoke up.
All Shadowbolts immediately looked at her. Lemon Zest even took off her headphones, which usually meant that the girl was in a deadly serious mood.
"Well..." she spoke unsuredly, "how did you see us?"
"Before we get to that, I must tell you about Principal Cinch. She summoned me into her office via Dean Cadence, and once I got there, making several more remarks about some other Crystal Preppers in a similar malevolent spirit, I entered her office only to find, to my surprise, that Shining Armor was there, too. Turns out, Cinch asked him to come to persuade me into participating in Friendship Games. I think it is obvious that I never wanted to compete, because I was focusing all my efforts on entering Everton, and once I pointed that out, Cinch asked him and Cadence to look for her contact sheet for the program... but in fact, she had it in her desk."
"She lied?" Applejack frowned. "What for?"
"So that she would have no witnesses for what would transpire next. She told me that her position allowed to exert influence on cases like mine, and basically told me to compete against Canterlot High... or she would have my application to Everton denied."
"WHAT?!" an indignant shout of others turned the attention of other customers to the girls.
"Young ladies," Mr. Cake called out, "I am all for having you chat here, but please obey noise regulation rules!"
"Okie-dokie-lokie, Mr. Cake! And we're sorry!" Pinkie Pie shouted back.
Mr. Cake and the customers returned to their business, dismissing the outburst.
"Not. Cool," Rainbow Dash growled.
"Did she seriously do that?" Sunny Flare asked disbelievingly.
"Ah would have caught on if Twilight lied," Applejack answered. "And Ah can tell pretty easily that Twilight ain't lying."
"That's... that's... aaargh! I cannot find a good enough word for that!" Princess Twilight tore at her hair, overwhelmed with indignation, not noticing that she stood up in her anger. "She threatened to ruin your educational advancement, your biggest dream that kept you going in a hostile atmosphere?! That's..."
"Blasphemy?" Sunset butted in.
"Not quite, Sunset, but close! How dare she..."
"Twilight," the Princess' counterpart spoke up, "please stop. It's of no use to be outraged about it now."
Shocked somewhat at her "twin" consoling her, the equine decided to sit down, although her face still showed the desire to banish Abacus Cinch to the moon for a thousand years.
"Did you feel the same?" she asked human Twilight.
"Worse than that. You did not have any obligations to her, and, as far as I understood from your tales, you did not experience the same bullying I did. And your version of Principal Celestia was certainly kinder..."
"Wait," Indigo Zap interrupted, "Principal Celestia also has a counterpart?"
"Yes," pony Twilight spoke up, "she and Luna are Princesses back in Equestria, and Princess Celestia was my mentor. In fact, I was her protege."
"To a certain extent, so was I," "Sci-Twi" spoke again, "but only to the point that it advanced Crystal Prep's reputation. When I did not want to compete for the school I could barely relate to anymore, instead preparing myself for the future, Principal Cinch put that future in jeopardy," her hands started shaking, and she took a few gulps of her milkshake, ignoring the straw and leaving a blot on her face. Wiping it out with her palm, she continued:
"I felt as if a dagger had been driven into my back, severing my spinal cord and leaving me paralyzed. When she said the word "denied", my skull just got proverbially ventilated. I did not know what to say. And I did not want her to destroy my dream. So I agreed. But reluctantly. My first desire was to fight back, but how? I did not carry any recording devices, since they are forbidden, my cell phone was back in my lab and it would be my word against hers, as there were no witnesses. She had me dead to rights. And I knew it. And I felt... betrayed. Principal Cinch... she gave me a chance to push myself harder, to study in a school that didn't suffer from a lack of budget, that had access to the best equipment money could buy. Even if I didn't fit fully in, and despite my classmates disliking me, I was grateful to her for giving me a place in her school, and not charging exorbitant sums for it. She never hindered my education, and she always recognized my efforts, along with the staff... so when she basically threatened to undermine what I dedicated my whole life to..."
The lavender-skinned human lowered her head, trying to hide tears that threatened to burst out. Noticing that, all Rainbooms drew her into a group hug, with Pinkie somehow managing to hug everyone. The Shadowbolts sat awkwardly, not knowing not to say.
"I... I can't believe it... for Principal Cinch to do... this..." Sunny Flare was struggling with her own emotions.
"Twilight did not exhibit any non-verbal signs that would indicate her telling lies," Sugarcoat said. "As such, we have to accept her version of events. Besides, I am surprised at your shock. Didn't you call her out as she tried to run away from Twilight when the latter unleashed the magic?"
"I did, but still... this is too big of a shock to me."
"This is such a sad story... and I think it only gets worse!" Sour Sweet spoke again.
"Sour, that's kinda uncool..." Lemon tried to admonish her classmate.
"Oh, it did take a turn for the worse," human Twilight spoke up. "My feelings were in turmoil, and the stress that you five added did not help me in the slightest. That's when my hatred deepened. Not only did I begin to hate almost everything related to CPA after that, wanting nothing more than to leave that place forever and not look back, but I began wishing for something to give me power over everyone, so that I could shove it into all the faces, and laugh as I exacted my revenge..."
*FLASHBACK*
"You could try the end of the line!"
"What did you say?"
"Just that someone as smart as you should definitely go first."
Lying through her teeth, not daring to say that to my face; I hope that you eat something sour and that grimace gets stuck on your face forever! It certainly suits you better than your Tartarus-damned fake smiles!
"Are we gonna win?!"
"I...I don't know."
It should be obvious even to you that nothing is 100% guaranteed, or did all those footballs to your head bash your brains out, logically fallacious as this statement is?!
"Wrong answer! Try again! Are. We gonna. Win?!"
Oh for the love of the stars and black holes, why ME of all people?! Do you have some perverse pleasure in doing this? And stop violating my personal space for Tartarus' sake!
"Um...I guess? I-It's just...I mean...I heard that CHS is doing well now. With their reputation. And, I mean, it's not better than ours, of course. But we can't let them do it, you know? Win, I mean? Right?"
Blank looks from everyone.
What are you staring at?! Try being in my position and I will see how well you fare! Oh wait, you all aren't wallflowers...
"You're gonna have to take a seat!"
Casting a glance at Indigo Zap, Twilight felt her anger burning.
Maybe one day you will break your back or have it broken for you for such an attitude; I'd like to see how you'll enjoy THAT!
"That was a really bad speech. You should consider not speaking in public."
You should consider the same. For someone who wants to be a politician, you woefully lack subtlety. One day someone might assassinate you for this, you know!
"Dude, you have gotta hear this!"
"Uh? Eh!"
First, I am a GIRL, for Tartarus' sake, second, I don't like heavy metal, and third, ONE DAY YOU'LL BE DEAF AND YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO LISTEN TO YOUR BELOVED MUSIC AND I WILL BE LAUGHING AT YOU AS YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO LISTEN TO MUSIC!!!
*END OF FLASHBACK*
All Shadowbolts were looking at their ex-classmate as if she just grew a second head. Even the Rainbooms looked a bit uncomfortable at their newest friends' admissions.
"Twilight..." Sour Sweet spoke, eyes wide, dropping her dual personality facade from shock, "how..?"
"How could I, you want to ask?"
"Yes."
"This did not happen all of a sudden. These feelings were building for a reasonably long time. Initially, it was merely being stung a bit, then offended, then angry. And when Cinch pulled that stunt, the feelings of betrayal only fueled the flame that was already in there, turning it into a blazing inferno. What began as simple negative thoughts turned into a desire to see my offenders hurt after this."
"Maybe, but still..."
"Stop it, Sour," Sugarcoat interrupted. "Much as I am shocked by Twilight's admission... I can't deny that her feelings... were not without reason. When such feelings gradually build up, sooner or later they overwhelm a person, and once said person had enough, their anger bursts out in a deed one would never believe them capable of. I believe Twilight was... very close to snapping."
"That I was..."
*FLASHBACK*
"Comin' through!"
Bash!
Tartarus damn it, Zap, maybe one day someone will push you like that and you'll crack your skull or something?! That would be karmic justice!
Thud!
"Seriously?" Sunny Flare rounded on Twilight. Still bedazzled, Twilight could not mutter much aside from:
"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to."
Are you blind? Maybe I should perform laser surgery on your eyes... and "accidentally" burn them out! Oh, and here's the two-faced wrench...
"Oh, sorry. Why don't you go ahead?"
"You are such a sweetie!.. I am watching you!"
Who the heck are you, Big Brother?! Get lost!
"Ahh! Yeah!"
Maybe someone should take your precious $250 headphones and SMASH THEM AGAINST THE GROUND?! I bet your face will be priceless!
"You are kinda being a doormat right now."
What wouldn't I give to make YOU a doormat... LITERALLY!!!
*END OF FLASHBACK*
"And all this was bubbling up until..." Indigo Zap trailed off, rendered incapable of making a thought. The shyest, the meekest, the bookworm-iest wallflower, who never said a single word against them...
...secretly wished to inflict serious pain and harm on them, or be subjected to said pain and harm.
It was almost an oxymoron, and still she could plainly see that Twilight was not lying.
"Oh, it took some time. I received a reprieve each time when I managed to track magic, and during ACADECA, I was in my element. It allowed me to focus my mind on something else except my inner rage. Even if I did not want to associate myself with CPA, I still relished the challenge. By the way, Sunset, you are a very good competitor. The last event almost made me lose; if not for some readings on less known trigonometrical methods, I would have lost to you."
"Wow... thanks, Twilight," Sunset scratched her head.
"But when I saw you being congratulated, receiving only dislike from my classmates again, I lost myself in my feelings of hurt and fury once more. I focused on my initial aims, looking after the Rainbooms, but got distracted upon seeing Fluttershy with her pets. Bonding with her over our mutual love for pets helped me to calm down a bit, but then she ponied up, my device absorbed her magic and Spike started talking, and I ran away in fear... sorry about that, Fluttershy. It was not good of me."
"It's fine, Twilight, I have forgiven you," the pink-haired girl smiled, making human Twilight smile in return.
"And then Cinch found me again... dropping another hint that she could still destroy my dreams. And I was lost again."
"And Tri-Cross relay?" Lemon asked.
"Well... whenever I received a glare or a snide remark, I was rapidly losing confidence in myself, thinking that my dream was about to be shattered because Crystal Prep would lose the event. This was not a decisive event, of course, but it was all that consumed my mind... that and feeling my face hurt. If not for Applejack..."
"Ah hay, Twi, it just didn't seem right ta leave ya like this," the farm girl spoke. "Yeah, it could have been an easy victory, but that wouldn't be right.
"You could have risked getting some serious flak from other students."
"Ah don't care, and few are brave enough to tell me that to mah face. These hands can hurt pretty well, an' where they can't, Big Mac can. So, Ah saved your biggest dream?"
"Yep... except that it was starting to turn into a nightmare. I was losing control of my arcanometer, and it was rapidly absorbing magic before I could stop it..."
"...and I didn't help matters by shouting at you," Sunset cast her head down.
"I have already forgiven you for that, Sunset. But yes, my morale was very low. Not because of you, not really, but because I realized that I was messing with something that really shouldn't be trifled with carelessly. However, Principal Cinch had other ideas..."
Twilight paused to drink in the last of her milkshake. Setting the glass against the table with stronger-than-necessary force, she continued:
"She saw the effects of magic, but somehow missed carnivorous plants and holes in space. She only saw pony ears and wings, and decided that magic gave CHS an unfair advantage. She did not see, or did not want to see, that my device has already evened out the playing field. In her bid to ensure that Canterlot would lose once again, she tried to force me to use it. I was reluctant... but she knew what buttons to push. She did not know, however, that the scheme has been rewired, so to speak. And when other Shadowbolts joined the pressure..."
*FLASHBACK*
"But you'd like to. And since our opponents have already used it to stay competitive, I see no reason why we shouldn't do the same. Unless, of course, you have no interest in Everton. Though, honestly, I think there's more knowledge packed in that little device than any independent study program could offer."
I... yes, it's true, I'd like to. But... it's dangerous! Wait... Oh no! Seriously? She threatens me with that again? This project is my whole life! What will I do if I am denied that chance?!
Wait... "there's more knowledge packed in that device..." indeed, there is... and knowledge is... POWER!
"I realize that you've always been an outcast,
It's not everyone at school who likes to think.
To find a student that's like you -
I've had one or maybe two,
But the good ones disappear before I blink."
I wonder if that's because you blackmailed them and backstabbed them as well as me! But that won't matter once I fully understand this magic..!
"Now, I understand you have your reservations,
It's hard to have a brain as large as yours."
When you are surrounded by idiots - of course it is! But I'll find a way to change that!
"But if we don't win these games -
Well, I think I've made it plain
What will happen if we have the losing scores!"
It couldn't be plainer if you tried to, backstabber!
"Unleash the magic, unleash the magic.
If we lose, then you're to blame!"
The nerve of them! How can I be to blame for this?! My device has already drained away their "advantage"! I had won the first event for them, and they DARE TO SAY THIS TO ME?! Just you wait...
"They all have used it, maybe abused it,
Because you are stuck-up elitists...
So then why can't we do the same?"
Why can't I, in fact do the same?
As she thought that, her magic-absorbing device flashed suddenly, vibrating slightly. It gave her a weird feeling, as if...
...the magic is calling out to me! I feel its... power!
*END OF FLASHBACK*
"Oh my Celestia..." Princess Twilight gasped. "I get it now. The feelings of anger and resentment at your ex-classmates... they created a state within you that was similar to Sunset's... you both wanted power of magic..."
"I did," human Twilight responded. "And I wanted to understand it, so I could use it to my own ends, and finally "show them all who is boss", as the saying goes..."
"Oh, that you did!" Sour Sweet said. "If not for Sunset and her friends, we would have been toast!"
"And as Cinch and we went on and on..." Lemon started.
"Yes. My feelings grew almost exponentially, evolving into what can retrospectively be called my inner demons."
*FLASHBACK*
"Call it power, call it magic -
If we lose, it will be tragic,
More important is the knowledge we'll have lost."
You don't care about knowledge, you only care about losing your precious games! I care about this knowledge more than you can imagine!
"A chance like this won't come again,
You'll regret not giving in.
Isn't understanding magic worth the cost?"
Oooh, you don't know how right you are! I will seize this chance, and I will understand this magic, no matter what it will cost me! But you surely as Tartarus won't get anything, because this knowledge will be MINE!
"Unleash the magic, unleash the magic!
We're not friends here after all.
Our only interest in this business
Is seeing Canterlot High School fall!"
MY only interest is getting what I want! And I want to understand magic, to gain its power!
But... but is this right? It's dangerous, it could seriously hurt anyone... I myself almost suffered a grim fate...
"What I'm suggesting's very simple,
And since it's win-win on all scores:
You only want to learn about the
Magic that you have stored."
I want more than THAT, but it's not necessary for you to know!
"And as for me and all the others -
We only want what we deserve:
That our school will clinch the win
And my LEGACY WILL ENDURE!"
Blah, blah, blah, I heard that jazz before!
What do I do? I can't refuse Principal Cinch, I can't go against my classmates... and I can't do it!
"Unleash the magic, unleash the magic!"
You can! You have unlimited power in your hands, and it's ALL YOURS! YOU are the one who is holding it! Unleash the magic! Claim it as your own!
"If we lose, then it's a crime!"
But what if it will lead to a disaster? All these people...
"But we can win it if you begin it."
They don't matter! When have people helped you?! No one likes you for what you are! No one appreciates you! Even Cinch only wants to use you for her petty ends! You are a friendless, lone wallflower, but you can be more, MUCH MORE THAN THAT! RISE ABOVE THEM ALL!
"It's up to you to not fail this time!"
It's up to you to not fail this time!
"Unleash the magic, free the magic now!"
But these are called Friendship Games... and there are nice people here...
"Unleash the magic, free the magic now!"
Friendship Games are a lie. No one is interested in friendships, only victory. FRIENDSHIP IS A LIE! Power is what matters! And you can gain it right here, right now! So will you catch this chance? Or are you content with the ill fate that is about to befall you? You being hated even more? Denied everything? Having your dream shattered?!
NO! I WON'T LET THEM DO THIS! NOT CINCH, NOT SHADOWBOLTS, AND NOT THIS GROUP OF "MAGIC GIRLS" EITHER! ALL OF THEM ONLY BROUGHT ME SADNESS AND MISERY, AND NOW THEY WANT TO SHATTER MY DREAMS!
BUT I!
HAVE!
HAD!
ENOUGH!!!
"Imagine all I'll learn by setting it free...
And now winning these games depends on me.
And what doors might open if I try to use it?
But the magic's what I really want to see!"
As the last words left her lips, Twilight opened the lid of her device...
"Unleash the magic, free the magic!
Unleash the magic, free the magic!"
The Shadowbolts' words ideally meshed with her new power calling for her...
Sunset Shimmer started running, no doubt to intercept her...
Principal Cinch leaned forward, eager to see what would transpire...
"Twilight, no!" the ever-faithful Spike tried to dissuade her until it's too late...
"NOW!"
NOW!
As the magic was unleashed, a gigantic energy blast dropped both Wondercolts and Shadowbolts to their knees, and then collapsed onto a sphere of arcane energy. As it rose, so did Twilight, and it began expanding, consuming her.
...PAIN!!!
Her nerves became inflammated with unbearable pain that readily surpassed even the pain of childbirth, by at least three orders of magnitude.
Finally, I have the power - and so do you!
No! I don't like it! I don't like it at all!
Fool! Now you have everything you wanted! You will be great!
But this magic... it is... painful! It does not feel RIGHT! It is as something in me... rejects it!
This is your weakness! It must go!
As Twilight almost became absorbed, she realized, to her horror, just WHAT exactly was going to happen...
No! NO!
Turning around, she called out in desperation to her classmates... surely even they would realize what's happening?!
"Heeeeeeeeeelllllllp...meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Fool! I am the one helping you! And you will see it NOW!
And then, as she was fully enveloped by the sphere, suddenly...
MAGIC.
She felt knowledge ram into her head. Spells, incantations, invocation rules and rituals...
...she saw all that and more.
Unprepared, she was unable to hold onto herself, and her inner demon seized the chance. Magic ran through her body...
Her hair stood as if propped up by static electricity...
Her clothes changed from Crystal Prep uniform to a risque dress like the one she always imagined buying in the future...
Dark and powerful wings appeared from her back...
A horn, a real horn, grew from her forehead...
And an aura appeared around her eyes, resembling her glasses but more... sinister and judging.
You have changed! Now you are great! You are powerful! You are REBORN! And you need a new name!
I already thought of one, she responded.
Opening her eyes, she looked around and realized that all these people standing below... they were but bugs.
Henceforth, I shall be known as...
As she inhaled oxygen into her lungs, so as to emit a classic evil laugh, her new name that she had just chosen thundered in her head:
...MIDNIGHT SPARKLE!!!
*END OF FLASHBACK*
"And you all know the rest already," Twilight Sparkle, ex-student of Crystal Prep, finished.
Everyone sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity (but in reality it was only three minutes), until Sunny Flare finally managed to croak:
"That's... that's... excuse-me-I'm-gonna-be-sick!" and she bolted out of the table, heading for ladies' room.
"Me too!" Lemon Zest abandoned her headphones (under any other circumstances, the other Shadowbolts would have found that amusing) and followed suit.
"Ugh..." Sour Sweet muttered. "I think I should re-put the blame for this debacle from Principal Cinch onto us!"
Saying this, she banged her head against the table and remained in that position.
"I feel like the lowest piece of shit in the world," Indigo said.
"Indigo Zap!" Rarity gasped. "Such language!"
"Try and find me another word that would do justice to how am I feeling right now, and I'll give you a hundred bucks."
Fifteen seconds later, Rarity was forced to concede defeat and Sunny and Lemon returned from their "trip".
"Sugarcoat?" the latter said. "Sugarcoat?"
Everyone looked at the girl with opalish grey hair, whose hands were... trembling while crossed in front of her.
"Er, Sugar?" Indigo tried to jerk Sugarcoat into a response by using the latter's least favourite nickname - but, as it usually happens in stories, even that method failed.
"Uh-oh..."
"I am such an IDIOT!"
This outburst startled everyone sitting at the table.
"How could I not have noticed this?! My Dad's a psychologist, I've been reading his books since childhood, it says everything about how to determine when a person is tormented but I failed to see that and only exasperated the situation..."
Everyone looked, surprised, as Sugarcoat blamed herself right in front of everyone without a care in the world, going on and on...
"...and I am no better than a Tartarus-damned criminal and - oh my, I'm rambling, aren't I?"
A chorus of affirmative "uh-huh" answers told her everything.
Sugarcoat rubbed her nose.
"Twilight, I... words cannot express what utter shame I am feeling right now. I have always believed in ideals of Crystal Prep, of competitiveness and constant race, because I truly believed that was an essential part of progress... but I forgot, in my blindness, that the Shadowbolts are supposed to take care of each other, and you were a Shadowbolt, since Cinch, er... chose you to represent our school. And I didn't do that. None of us did."
Other Shadowbolts agreed with her.
"I know that we haven't been on friendly terms... but I should have recognized the signs of your imminent breakdown. Instead, I only exacerbated the situation, and went along with others, instead of saying "Stop!" and analyzing everything. In retrospect, I should have guessed what was going on in your mind, because there were signs. Not obvious, mind you - you hid your feelings quite well - but they were there. And I ignored them."
To surprise of everyone, Sugarcoat paused and took off her glasses, which she never did. When she looked into human Twilight's own eyes, the latter noticed that without glasses, her blunt ex-classmate looked less stern and more like a scared deer caught in car's lights.
"I... don't expect you to just forget this. And I do think this will take time, but... Twilight? Can you ever forgive us for our admittedly very bad mistakes? And... if you are OK with this... can we try to mend the bridges later?"
"You aren't going to drag me back to Crystal Prep, are you?"
"Stars forbid, Twilight! After what you just told us, even I feel... hesitant to return there. No. How about... visiting you at CHS or at least... meeting at neutral grounds?"
Human Twilight thought about this a little bit, and then said...
"Sugarcoat... girls... I... I am sorry, too. I thought such bad things about you... and when I turned into that demoness-thing, I was just... ready to dispose of you like of an insect..."
"Given what led you to thinking this," Indigo Zap spoke up, "I cannot blame you. There is nothing to ask forgiveness for, if you ask me. But if you do need to hear this... we forgive you. Right, girls?" she looked at others, words "You better agree or else" written on her face, and others quickly heeded the advice.
"I understood, once Sunset gave me her hand of friendship, that hatred isn't the right way," the ex-Shadowbolt spoke. "So... yes, I forgive you, all of you... and I am willing to try again. Just... give me some time first, while I adapt to CHS, OK?"
"Very well, Twilight," Sunny Flare spoke. "And... thank you," she said with a smile, which was returned sheepishly.
"Ohmigoshohmigosh!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed with a gasp. "You know what this calls for?"
Everyone expected the usual answer dreadfully...
"A GROUP HUG!"
With a SQUEE!, Pinkie drew everyone into a hug.
"How does she do this?" Indigo Zap muttered.
"I thought you wanted to say party," Lemon Zest spoke.
"You silly citrus, party is Stage Two! We're on Stage One!"
"Oh... alright! Cool!"
Mr. and Mrs. Cake shook their heads at the scene, but paid no heed to it.
The idea for this fic came to me shortly after watching Friendship Games, but until lately I have not been able to properly formulate a plot.
One serious question that bugged me was this:
"Just why did Twilight turn into a demoness?"
You see, Sci-Twi did not strike me as being evil enough for that transformation throughout the movie. Obsessed with magic? Yes, but personally, I feel that by itself it was not enough. If you remember Sunset Shimmer before her reformation, she did classify as evil enough. But Sci-Twi didn't.
So I have attempted to find an answer to this question... and my school experience helped.
I haven't been in exactly the same situation as Sci-Twi was. I had friends, for instance. Very few, but still - friends. I haven't studied in a CPA-style school; all the schools I have been to were normal state-sponsored free public schools. I had suffered some bullying, but after several "blood rage" lashouts people stopped bothering me. I was a better-than-average student, but not always at the top of our class or school. And no member of staff ever blackmailed me.
But I still sympathized heavily with Sci-Twi. And remembering my school age, I remembered my resentment, dislike and sometimes - yes - hatred that I felt sometimes, which was aimed at specific persons. I used to wish for a chance to exact my revenge on them for every single nerve cell I had lost because of them. I dreamt of having some power over them, to put them in their place, and to negate the numerical advantage over me.
Nowadays I am different, and I have no desire to track everyone of them down to take revenge. The reasons are too petty now. But thinking on this, I have come to a conclusion:
If I were in Sci-Twi's place, I, too, might have fallen into the temptation of my inner demons.
That's why I wrote her like this, and that's why she may seem OOC here. Personally, I don't think this would be OOC for a brainy person in her situation, but if you have a differing opinion - I am open for discussion.
Also, I did not want to write Shadowbolts as total jerks... it just doesn't suit them, in my not-so-humble opinion. Especially Sugarcoat. Of everyone else, she is my favourite.
Thoughts, comments and criticism are always welcome in the comment box 
Stay tuned! 
Extradimensional Alien out.
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This story is a really good character study
Nice work.
I have to admit, I would likely succumb to that sort of power. But I wouldn't focus my rage on classmates. No, my rage would destroy everything. I would wipe the world clean and start over, with no humans.
Maybe that's why I enjoy the show so much. Its world is mostly peaceful. Any problems can be solved through friendship.
Sorry for rambling on, but this seemed like the best place to do it.
As someone who has fought off insanity through sheer willpower on a fairly regular basis, I think that if I absorbed that kind of power, I would bend it to my will, and then use it for my own nefarious purposes. Mainly taking over a section of the world, then isolating it from the rest as the section I became dictator of grows in power, eventually using the accumulated power to get rid of everybody who doesn't submit to my rule, and take over this pathetic dirtball we call a planet. After that, I would go hands-off and let it run itself for the most part, as I explore my powers and become even stronger. Power for the sake of power, even if I won't ever use it all.
I am a lawful evil after all.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
23:40_11/30/2015
6685343
You flatter me
but I'd like it very much if someone else tried writing a fic on this topic.
6685397
I wouldn't call it "study" per se... I just recalled some of my school experiences and how they correlate with Sci-Twi's story and my feelings back then, and meshed them (with some substantial changes) into this fic.
6685474
No prob, I wouldn't even call that "rambling"
That's radical
with whom would you talk? Because when there's no one to talk with, it certainly leads to insanity...
Same here... I got hooked when I tried watching it when geopolitical situation was messed up
6686128
You are quite sure of yourself... keep in mind that one day you may find even less tame-able power.
Sounds attractive
who didn't secretly dream of it? I certainly did.
Don't forget the moustache
If you ask me, Stalin had the coolest moustache:
causticsodapodcast.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2013/09/stalin.jpg
I would collect all the scientists and tell them to find a way to colonize other planets and invent FTL... I want my own interstellar dreadnaught and to sip exquisite wine while sitting in captain's chair of that dreadnaught!
Are you a D&D fan, by chance? I am a player myself, although I mostly play Warhammer 40000: Dark Heresy and curse like a sailor when the dice pwn me.
6686128
BTW, I didn't downvote your comment...
6686428 First, I am sure that I would be able to tame the power. Secondly, I can't grow a moustache... my facial hair doesn't grow out longer than three-eights of an inch for some reason, and third, I don't play any tabletop RPGs, but I am knowledgeable about moral alignment and all of that.
The world domination thing, that is really optional, I only said it as the most plausible way to get where others won't interfere with my life. I could alternately go into the mountains somewhere and build a secret complex inside one, and gain power that way, or I could go the Bioshock route and make an underwater complex. I wouldn't make an airborne base, just because it would be too easy of a target (not to mention too easy to discover).
Ultimately, I am the kind of person who would make an unstoppable army of golems, for the sole purpose of having an army just laying around in the unlikely case that I would ever need one. Essentially, just to have the option for it.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
1:6_12/1/2015
Sci-Twi's a step below Shinji Ikari.
6686751
I am afraid my knowledge of Evangelion is non-existent.
Why?
6686428 I don't talk to anyone, but I suppose it leaks into my writing. But don't worry, I won't purposefully start WWIII or something like that.
This was a great analysis of why Human Twilight did become Midnight Sparkle at the end of the movie: how all the bullying keeping adding up (and why she kept researching magic) until she reached her breaking point.
Thank that Sunset was there to bring her back.
Guess we're two peas in the same pod.
In fact, I myself am writing the Shadow Five in a different light in my story; Shadowed Bolts. In that story, the five of them have to stop the constant fighting between the Defectors; a rebellious group of CPA students who torment other students who want the school to change; and the Changelings; the black-clad Disciplinarians of the newly-elected Principal Chrysalis.
But still, it's good that we're both trying our hardest to make the Shadow Five into more respectable and beloved characters...
Especially Sugarcoat, who I've given a really good headcanon to...
6687042 I hear you. Personally, I was utterly confused by how Twilight was portrayed. I didn't think any version of her (not counting the one from Good King Sombra's universe) could be evil. But I guess when you sent a long period of time being scorned for the very thing that makes you you, even the Princess of Friendship can think negatively about those people. I mean, we've seen her use dark Magic before, and you would need to be able to feel hatred to use it, so we've seen that she isn't incorruptible. Princess Twilight just developed a great resistance to it. But Sci-Twi doesn't have the experience. And once she unleashed the magic her device stolen, it reacted to those negative thoughts and unleashed her inner demons that wanted to make them suffer as she had suffered.
I'm just glad Sunset managed to convince her to let go of all that hate, showing her that there was somebody (six somebodies) who wanted to be her friends.
And well, as much as it pains me to say it, I suppose that in order to expose Cinch for the evil person she is and show the Shadowbolts the light, in a way, Midnight Sparkle was kind of necessary.
A powerful and profoundly disturbing story, all the more disturbing for its plausibility. It greatly matches my own thoughts on the matter and what may have created Midnight Sparkle for, as this story suggests, the black-winged monster was something that had long been hiding in Twilight, waiting to escape.
Your description of Twilight's disintegrating sanity as her psychotic episode took hold was quite chilling but nonetheless, rang true.
The ending was a nice break from the darkness, which was necessary due to the fandom that the story was written in. Sometimes, healing requires admission and we've seen that begin here. Not just for Twilight, but for the Shadowbolts too.
Meanwhile... Abacus Cinch should be a little more afraid today. She has drawn the attention and ire of certain powers that are normally content to be passive advisers and counsellors. Beware the nice ones, in other words.
Whoa... You sir have earned my respect.
I think this song would be fitting for Midnight Sparkle.
No you didn't. Actually, I knew at the beggining they were manipulated by Cinch.
Dang. This pretty much speaks to my thoughts regarding Sci-Twi's transformation too, especially as one who can sympathize with her plight. I had to deal with assholes all the way up to college, and wanting them to suffer is still kinda in there. Well done.
Expect a nod to this story somewhere down the road.
6686855 She just reminded me of Asuka for that reason.
Hah! No dislikes on this story so far, now isn't tat something?
Amazing. I think this is probably how she really was before all this happened, and I wish they had touched upon it in the movie more.
I'm not a real fan of this one. If the point was to show that she transformed because she was evil, it fails to address that the possibility that transformations don't only occur from evil. Consuming a vast supply of eldritch magic might have had something to do with it, though, considering she was tampering with things that she shouldn't have.
It's why i feel this fic is wrong when addressing Sunset yelling at Twilight. It was because Sunset was right, and Twilight had no idea what she was doing. "But I want to understand!" doesn't help your argument when you almost get the school killed. Yes, Twilight didn't know, but that does not create an automatic shield that it was all her fault. She made a mistake.
And due to your own writing style, I feel like making this story retroactive was a mistake, and should have been a tale that occurred stream of consciousness. The reason for this is Twilight is displaying very little in terms of emotional trauma in the present. This story is split into two segments: exposition, and story. The power of this story is displaying Twilight's own decent into anger and madness, and the tension is killed whenever the present returns along with the expositional aspect. Having very abrupt *FLASHBACK* disclaimers doesn't help either. Yes, it does explain when this is occurring, but at the price of story immersion.
That's why I feel this story should have been portrayed alongside Twilight and not retold in flashbacks. The past trauma isn't felt as strongly when we see her relatively fine in the present. Stream of conscious lets audiences feel the emotional punches as they occur without the disruption.
It's not that I believe that every tale that involves darkness requires absolute darkness, but it feels like you're trying to take a bite out of both cakes. The tastes don't match. Shit, I had a good metaphor here somewhere and I lost it. What I mean to say is that you're trying to have the dark aspects along with the recovery aspects in a way that doesn't quite fit. It feels like it would have been better to stick with one or the other.
Sorry, don't like this one.
OK, first off, good story. I will like and place this in one of my files. One complaint I have, the diolog was just a bit off in some places. Except Sugarcoat, you got her diolog down pretty near perfect. I think the problem is that in some places, it feels like Sugarcoat is talking when it's someone else.
Hope you take this as the constructive criticism it is meant to be.
6689211
You just had to say it, didn't you?
I am not mad, but the irony is killing my sides now
6687042
Thank you
6687117
I am actually tracking "Shadowed Bolts" right now, but my Tracking list is private, so most likely you aren't aware of that. So far, I am enjoying the direction of your story, but I'm reserving my judgement for now.
But I am surely glad that you don't go with Shadow Five bashing either
6687378
You flatter me
I did try to make it realistic, although I didn't think it would fall into "disturbing", even if I tagged it "Dark".
What exactly would you consider disturbing? I am curious.
6689497
I am afraid it was a bit difficult to make alternative descriptors for Shadow Five, but when re-reading, I didn't get the impression that it was difficult to identify the speaker in some cases... the perils of not having a pre-reader.
...yeah, it shows that Sugarcoat is my favourite Shadowbolt
I don't dislike or hate the others, but she "speaks more closely" to me, and I also sometimes prefer to speak very bluntly.
6690183
OK, I may have used the wrong wording for what I was trying to convey. What I meant was that in some places, your word choice and use of contractions(or lack-there-of) felt out-of-place with the character speaking but wouldn't have if it was Sugarcoat speaking.
Example:
Now, for the most part, the diolog here fits RD pretty well, except for that last sentence. I'm not very good at writing but I'll try to write out what I think would sound more natural for her.
I hope I did that good enough. But, am I getting my point across better now? If you disagree with what I'm saying, let me now and tell me why, maybe I'm missing something.
6689477
I didn't intend to show that she transformed simply because of being evil (although a seed of evil was definitely there), but because of a combination of factors where she felt herself cornered into a lose-lose position by people whom she started to despise and hate, and lashed out with all negative aspects that were gradually building and reached critical mass by the time she decided to unleash the magic. Does that not show?
Do I understand you correctly that, in your opinion, an unprepared mind (like Sci-Twi's) may have been twisted by vast amounts of magic regardless of moral stance?
About transformations occurring not only from evil: it's plausible, but so far in EG universe, evil transformations were done by evil characters (Sunset Shimmer and Dazzlings). Unless the third movie breaks from this line of thought (and I didn't see this happening), it requires that a seed of evil must be present within Sci-Twi - but it's not really visible, which is what inspired me to write the story in the first place.
Of course, we may have differing headcanons on that matter, so if you're inclined to share your thoughts, fell free.
I don't believe I bashed Sunset for that in my story. The addressing is based on Sunset's own feelings on that matter, where she regrets snapping at Sci-Twi, even though she was right (fully in best case, partially in worst case), and that was shown in the movie. I did not believe I could simply dismiss that, given that Sunset's outrage also plays a role in pushing Sci-Twi into the transformation.
I agree with you on that one, actually, but from POV of the story, this realization only fuels her negative side.
Err, how did you deduce my writing style so quickly?
Do I understand you correctly that it should have been an uninterrupted story running parallel to Friendship Games plot?
Should she display more emotional trauma? No offense, but I find it implausible that Sci-Twi would want to do that in front of Shadowbolts, who gave her enough grief over years and whom she even hated. The feelings of hate may be gone or suppressed, but I don't think she would simply forget what had transpired between them, and while I have no set timeframe on when this story happens, I don't imagine it happening later than two months from the events of Friendship Games. No person I know would want to display emotional trauma in front of their ex-enemies that soon, and neither would Sci-Twi.
Fair enough. I believe I get your point.
"Relatively" is the key operative word. She still carries emotional trauma, but is afraid to show it, so everyone would assume she's fine.
I am a guy who can pop a sweet into a mouth when eating soup and think nothing of it
Joking aside, I'm not sure I would have been able to write a story while choosing one of the two options, as you suggested. Within the time frame I had chosen (approximately from two weeks to two months after Friendship Games), I would have inevitably fused them.
You are doomed.JokingThank you for the criticism.
6690183 ...I hate jinxing the moments... bah, I've should've seen it coming through from a mile away...
6690248
Now I get it better. Thank you
In my head and in that sentence, Rainbow Dash was referring to things that were even further in the past than a certain point (that is asking the smart ones for help), and thus I wrote it in Past Perfect. But yes, your option would sound at least just as good.
I think it's my own snag coming up in that one: my brain absolutely dislikes writing characters speaking with mistakes. Even an underclassed negative character written by me would speak correctly, if not in high-society language
6690388
Don't be hard on yourself
6690410 I'm not hating myself, I hate myself for jinxing the moment even though I've seen it coming, and I was liking the likes only/no dislikes so far...
6690381
For the evil aspect, no it doesn't show because the logic in the fic doesn't align with Twilight's dialogue. It doesn't mesh the anti social personality traits with her desire to learn more about magic. This story is sticking with the first and running with it and ignoring the latter, despite having a clear greater importance in the movie.
For the transformation, I disagree about even using the title of evil in a subjective sense. She wasn't evil to begin with, didn't hurt anyone with her abilities, and willingly let go over her goals when confronted by Sunset. She's done the least harm in her one winged angel form out of all the movie villains. At best her actions can be described as greedy. But evil? Hardly.
For writing style, I learned it by reading the story. That's, er, kinda how you figure those things out. I figured that would be obvious. As I already stated, the back and forth sequence was incredibly disjointed and suffered from sever mood whiplash. That made it difficult to empathize with Twilight at times because she was switching from anguished to calm as it shifted from past to present. There's a reason why that's not done, and it is because it tries to make readers feel a lot in a short time and with multiple flashbacks can be straining. There's very little emotional attachment to Twilight in the present. That only occurs in the past, and thus why I state this story should have been running parallel to Friendship Games rather than this strange in media res.
At least if it was running parallel I would be able to feel for her as she experiences trauma. Here's she's nothing but a blank slate. It's not bad, but it's not good either. It's dull. That's the problem; you don't show anything about Twilight in the present. All of her pain and turmoil has already occurred. It's just a waiting game and the writing during the present is uninspired during these segments. She's not showing it to everyone else. Okay. But there's a problem.
She's not showing it to the readers either.
Don't treat characters in universe and readers of the story as the same person. I say this because it's written as third-person omniscient and not third-person limited, where bias can leak in through the cracks due to taint from whoever is watching. Perhaps Team Rocket Crystel Prep doesn't see anything, but let readers make their own conclusions. If the cast don't see anything, write them as not seeing anything, and leave what you want the readers to think about characters thinking about other characters (That level of recursion is exactly why you shouldn't do that) out of it.
6690183
The disturbing part was Twilight's internal dialogue with her own strengthening dark self and how you could read her mind disintegrating as all the stresses, betrayals and disappointments stacked up on her.
I love to see a sequeal to this, Where Twilight confesses to Candance and Shining what Cinch did, not just for herself but to prevent Cinch from doing it to other students in the future.
6690449
I did not think it necessary to focus on something that had already been shown in the movie, since I did not want to repeat something from it.
Am I correct in presuming that you speak about her demonic "Midnight Sparkle" form? (Just to be sure.) Because while I can agree with first point, and partially on third one (she did so only after being overwhelmed by Daydream Shimmer's magic, but still - willingly), I need to point out that she didn't hurt anyone because everyone managed to evade in time. But the last dimensional rift in the ground would certainly have led to fatalities if not for plot-required "join-in-face-of-disaster" moment for Shadowbolts and their help.
I am officially surprised. Since when greediness isn't considered evil?
And even if one presumes it isn't, can't greediness lead to evil?
And finally, this piece of dialogue:
I see no reason against presuming that Midnight Sparkle cares little if she kills the whole human world, as long as she gets what she wants, and everyone else - be damned. That doesn't count as evil?
...maybe it's mentality differences? It's not the first time when some of my thoughts and convictions receive misunderstanding among foreigners. In any way, sorry, but I think we'd have to agree to disagree on this point.
I apologize, it seems we had put different semantics behind "writing style". Among those fan fiction writers I had known and even talked to personally, there is a consensus that one's writing style is something that is devised from all stories that one has written, not just one, and I assumed (wrongly, it seems) that this thought is universally accepted among fan fiction writers. I'm sorry for misunderstanding.
As for the rest of your advice: again, thank you a lot, I will do my best to keep that in mind while writing in the future
P.S. It was not me who downvoted your first comment.
6690865
I see. I did not intend to make it classed as "disturbing", but apparently, my brain decided otherwise.
6691061
The best part is that I did not write that with a humorous intent. Princess Twilight did consider banishing Cinch to the moon for a thousand years.
6691313
Sorry, but I don't see a way for this to work - there were no witnesses, and Twilight didn't record anything.
This won't fly
6691396 While I see that evidence is necessary, whom do you think Cadence and Shining would believe: some stuck up principal who was all about reputation, or their own sister (in-law, in Cadence's case)? I'm sure that's all they were saying.
And so you don't misinterpret, I'm saying that both of you guys raise very good points.
6691380
I'm not miffed by downvotes anymore, particularly because it's hard to find those who don't give detailed critiques that know what Poe's Law is. That's not to say all don't, but it's easier to make snap judgments.
The problem with ignoring her desire to learn about magic to stick with her personality disorder is that your story doesn't cover all the necessary details. It's missing the big Chekov's Gun that is that desire, and not addressing it is poking holes in the theory that it was majorly caused by her torment. It wasn't.
In scientific testing, there's something called P-hacking. It means fiddling with your data in order to set the test result in order to get some kind of statistically significant result. You see this in things like testing foods to see if they are healthy for you. If you have a small number of people in the test, and check a lot of variables for change over the course of the test, the chances become higher that P becomes even lower, and thus you have a greater chance of finding something "statistically significant".
Now having Twilight's problems be social could have something to do with it. It might also be because of lack of friends, she was forced into a competition she didn't like, her aspirations were being held hostage, any number of possible social disorders, or consuming enough magic to see Azothoth in the great beyond where death itself may die. Any number of these could have an impact on Twilight's behavior. That's my problem with her depiction here: her eventual transformation is depicted as entirely one thing and ignores the other facets. I don't believe the story goes into enough detail in order to have earned saying that Twilight did what she did because she was hated by her peers. There's not enough to support that.
And I outright disagree that Twilight was evil post transformation. She didn't hurt anyone. Did she have the power to hurt someone? Of course, but she didn't. Assuming that she would is only assuming. It's not proof, or even circumstantial evidence.
And as for greediness? Hehe heh.
Here's part of the problem. You're seeing this entirely in black and white. Twilight is either good or evil. Greed is either bad or good. There is no middle ground.
This is wrong in a fictional sense and in the real world.
That's why I said your style didn't work with having split expositional and story scenes (I judged it on this story alone. Reading an entire bibliography just to understand that only means I'm going to be spending a lot of time reading. Take Steven King for instance. You don't need to read everything just to understand how he writes). If you jsut left it alone and let the readers decide on their own what is bad and good, I believe it would have worked out a lot better.
Greed is not a sign of evil. For one, evil itself is an entirely subjective term. To me the guy on his phone in the theater is being a greedy bastard by putting his own desires ahead of everyone else's. I don't care if it's the terrorists calling in the ransom demand for your children, turn off your goddamn phone.
Greed is a character trait. No more, no less. It's something that you can use to define someone in broad spectrum, but it is not in of itself an evil descriptor. Fluttershy is described as kind. is that a good term? What about the doctor in Auschwitz giving patients cyanide so they don't have to work in the salt mine? Isn't that a kindness? (SJ Warriors, I have no idea if that actually happened, so fucking chill).
I want this. Perhaps I need it, but maybe I don't. The guy cutting ahead of me in traffic is greedy. The grandma who takes the last Trixie plushie when I obviously need it more than her is greedy. Taking the pay increase and ignoring underlings is greedy.
Being greedy doesn't mean your evil, it means your an asshole. The two are not absolute synonyms.
Yes, it can lead to evil, but it didn't, as the movie showed. She was tearing holes in reality to get to Equestria. She wasn't trying to kill anyone; that was just something that may or may not occur. Again, that's not evil, that's just being a titanic asshole. Perhaps you'll say that being an asshole itself is subjective and her actions could be interpreted as evil. Too true, but so is the reverse. That is one of the problems with committing to something; you better be absolutely right, otherwise it begins to fall apart. If evil Twilight isn't evil, then the very premise is undermined.
Maybe Twilight would have ripped the entire world in her rampage. But what if upon seeing what she did, she saw the horror she committed and just shut down upon realizing what she became. Feeling regret isn't evil. Making a mistake isn't evil. That's the problem with trying to quantify known unknowns. You can't someone is undoubtedly evil during a situation that never transpired.
I don't believe it's a difference in cultures, I believe it's both in part because of your own particular writing style, and being a less experienced author makes you a little less familiar with some of the tropes and thought processes that come with evil characters, descents into madness, and experience. This story felt more like it needed to focus more on her mind as it was occurring rather than exposition to explain it to readers.
6686128
See, you say that now, but who knows what'll actually happen if to were to happen?
6692699 If I were to lose myself to it, well, you better hope that doesn't happen, because there won't be a world left to save...
Hence my optimism that I could slave it to my will.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
22:0_12/2/2015
...
Hm. This was really, really well written.
But now I yearn for a dark "Twilight gets revenge on Cinch in an extremely fucked up way" fic.
Something very painful, and magic related.
6693472
Not sure I'll write that one...
Thank you for commenting
6691851
Fair point. Criticism accepted.
I'm not much of a scientist, and my speciality does not usually deal with statistics. Thanks for that tidbit about P-hacking. It's interesting. Do I understand correctly that, in your opinion, I did this very P-hacking?
She didn't. By sheer dumb luck and the fact that she cared more about opening portals at that moment. In the movie, at least two beams she fires forces others (Humane 6 at the first time, Principal Celestia in the background at the second) to engage in evasive maneuvers so as not to get hurt. I can believe that she didn't specifically target anyone, but firing indiscriminately into a crowd among other directions (at least, that's how I perceive those moments) is most definitely not fine in my book, moreso if it's obvious that those beams and portals can be quite dangerous. And I doubt that the magic she fires at Daydream Shimmer is tickling hexes, most likely it's dark magic.
Granted, it's not Demon Sunset's level of evil, who tried to outright kill Twilight Sparkle, and her intents can be considered less malevolent, if we don't delve into the territory of "once she gets magic, what will she do next?". But the callousness and apparent total disregard of side effects of which she is already actually aware (carnivorous plants at Tri-Cross Relay), one of which could potentially be a total collapse of the human world don't let me leave Midnight Sparkle without an "evil" tag, no matter how minuscule her "evilness" is when compared to Demon Sunset and Dazzlings.
That doesn't count as circumstantial evidence?
Will try to avoid that in the future.
Depends on whether one considers mercy killing a kindness. For me it's an evil act, albeit it's a lesser evil when compared to work in the mines. And then again, who knows - it can happen so that they gave cyanide to, say, 15 people, and very next day, Soviet forces show up to liberate everyone, meaning that those 15 people could be saved.
And I'm not certain that the superiors of said doctor would approve of depriving Third Reich of slave resources.
Depends on the level of greed. If it's amped up to high levels, to the point when the person doesn't care about others at all and is willing to throw everyone else under the bus, disregarding lives, that's usually described as evil to a certain extent. (Where I live, at least.) And Midnight Sparkle's greediness seems to be really amped up to such a level.
Good question! The possibilities are numerous. Personally, I am certain that she would have called herself evil upon realizing that she destroyed the whole world.
No argument there from me. But before Sci-Twi showed herself through Midnight Sparkle persona and felt regret, she had to see Spike's ultra-sad face (in my headcanon, that's when she realized that she did have a friend in Spike, but did not pay attention to it sooner) and get zapped by Daydream Shimmer. Without that, Midnight Sparkle wouldn't have stopped.
In fact, I have come to view Sci-Twi and Midnight Sparkle as two different entities, because they are so totally unlike each other. And when the former unleashed the magic, the latter came into existence and took over her. Note that I attribute the evilness only to Midnight Sparkle. But personally, I find it very hard to believe that Midnight Sparkle would have come to existence without Sci-Twi having some negative element within her (maybe not evil per se, but negative) as a fertile soil for the former to grow upon. I have always believed firmly that a person has both good and evil within them, and this belief is attributed by me to fictional characters too. This principle hasn't failed me before.
Again, thank you for valid points.
6691619
Sorry I missed your comment.
Shining would most certainly believe his sister, I think, and Cadence would be more inclined to believe her after Friendship Games, but still, proof is needed.
Of course, Shining and Cadence may try catching Cinch at something else as retribution, but this would be... problematic. I'm very certain that Cinch would watch her step and be extra-careful.
Also: TBH, I don't think that Shining and Cadence are married in human world... I got the impression that Shining had a crush, and maybe it was reciprocated, but I wouldn't go beyond them dating.
Besides, dating the Dean of the school which you graduated from... isn't that weird a bit with age difference? I'm only theorizing, but Cadence appears to be in early thirties (my own guess is 32-33), while Shining Armor can be considered... I don't know, 27 years old at max.
"Both of you guys" - you mean me and Journeyman?
6696881 Of course I meant both you and Journeyman. And as for the marital status in the human world, we don't know for sure if the two are a couple or not. I was just throwing it out there. Besides, I fairly certain their around the same age. And like I said before, I did say that proof was indeed still needed. I just thought it would be OOC if they put their faith in someone besides Twily, especially Cinch. That one time pony Shining did was under...certain conditions.
this story confirms it: Pinkie Pie is beyond what is considered normal in ANY dimension...
6708584
She's Pinkie Pie. Any attempts to find an explanation will destroy your brain
My brain: Not me.
Me: Somebody wants "Cupcakes"?
My brain: NOOOO! OK, I'm sorry!
Me: Good boy
Found an error.
"as" should be "ask"
you are missing the K
6713379
Fixed. Thank you for pointing that out.
The things that get through my proof-reading...
6714041 it was literally the only error I found in the entire story. You did an amazing job if that was the only thing you missed.
6714050
Thanks