- Member Since 13th May, 2016
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TheOneWithoutAName
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TheOneWithoutAName
Joined 13th May, 2016 ·
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Well, I thought it was sexy. You missed an apostrophe for the Possessive Form now and then, but for the most part, it was fine.
However... You are going to get sooo many downvotes for this. FoE stories are not usually judged on how well they're written, but by how much hate the sub-fandom gets. If that doesn't bother you, honestly, I admire you.
Didn't Discord help the Caribou in the FoE setting?
7354163
I anticipate the downvotes. In my opinion downvotes for something ridiculous like that its not their fetish is just plain stupid. If they don't like it, they should just leave it alone. I even put in the description that it is orienting itself on the Fall of Equestria theme so that EVERYONE could see it! But that's just people. It is sometimes really hard to understand those haters. I mean, you don't see me downvoting the hell out of gay clop stories because they are not my thing.
So yeah. I expect the downvotes, but don't mind. There are people who are into this and for these people I was writing it. Maybe a bit for myself too, since I couldn't get that picture of cold-blooded-twilight out of my head! Seriously, that pic that inspired me was extremely hot!
7354257
Could be. I personally haven't read every main story there is. Sometimes I even skipped a chapter. I was just writing this to a picture of cold-blooded-twilight. And in this picture Discord was a female and fucked by the caribou. With that it made sense for me to make Discord one of the good guys who gets captured and then turned into a female cum dumpster.
7354163 As they should. Fall of Equestria nerds to go away already.
7354271
I don't share your opinion, and I'm glad you're not in a position to enforce it.
7354262
It's at this point more of a moral white knight type of thing which is ridiculous in itself.
7354271
A fetish is a fetish. Fall of Equestria in itself is nothing more than a domination and degradation fetish. Sometimes also torture depending on the writer. I'm not really into torture for example.
If you don't like such fetishes, it's an ok thing. I won't judge you because of your fetishes, but you shouldn't judge others because of something such meaningless as well. It's like Star Wars fans and Star Trek fans raging against another. And no one needs that! That's why I send a smile your way!
7354292
It is just a fanwork. I also don't see how it is ridiculous considering Discord being on the ponies side is canon in the series!
7354316 It's rape fetish. Rape is fucking unacceptable.
7354322
It is. And I would never support it. But here it is just a fantasy. No one was harmed while writing this story. That's in my opinion always the main point. If someone really does rape, and not as a fantasy, harming others, it is the most terrible thing imaginable. But here as a mere fantasy and fetish, where no one is harmed it is neither a terrible nor a good thing. It is just a fetish.
And here I was hoping Fall of Equestria had died off. Hopefully this'll be the last one.
7354481
Don't challenge me! I can always write more! MUAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm not too chicken to stop writing stories like this because some people might downvote or complain!
7354559
Please don't.
7354579
Relax. I'm only writing something if I'm in the mood, and currently I'm not really in the mood for more. Besides, this story is not much different from Fluttershy's Stocks. It has Rape, Gangbang, and Sluttification in it, and still people give it a better vote than this story. Suffice to say that people are weird. And blind too. If they would act rationally this story would get a lot more upvotes! I mean, if Fluttershy's Stocks can get more likes than dislikes, this should theoretically too!
7354559
I'll say please don't as well. But not for the same reason. You should never write a story just to troll haters. Do it because you like the scenario you have dreamed up. You can't please everyone, so your first focus should be on pleasing yourself.
I happen to like many of the fetishes depicted in Fall, but only when they are presented in a tongue in cheek manner, which is not how it is handled in Fall. Fall of Equestria is too grimly realistic for me to feel anything but a sour stomach from repressed anger over the situation the ponies are in.
You have a good record of dealing with these things in an unrealistic manner, that's a compliment by the way, so I won't write this story off out of hand.
7354621
Or maybe Fluttershy's Stocks deserves more downvotes.
I'm not saying it actually does deserve them, just that your argument can swing against you as well.
7354651
I have a pet peeve against people who downvote based on things other than the content of the story. Maybe people give this an automatic downvote simple because it's associated with Fall of Equestria.
You see the same thing with Human in Equestria and Anthro stories. People who really dislike both those genres give them downvotes without even reading them.
I think some people join those groups just so they can quickly find new stories when they are published to downvote them.
all stories, even those set in the Fall of Equestria, should only be judged on their content and presentation, not their genre.
To tell the truth I only downvote stories that have a false summary so you end up reading something you find distasteful. If the author is honest about the nature of his story and it's the sort of thing I don't like, I don't even bother to read it.
7354640
I only write a story if I like it. I liked the idea so I wrote it. So you don't have to worry about it. I'm not writing to troll. I'm writing because I want to!
7354651
Not really. You only talk like that because of your views on Fall of Equestria. If I say Fluttershy's Stocks has the same fetishes than this fic which is a fanwork of Fall of Equestria you immediately put it on a level with it. You conclude Fall of Equestria = Bad, therefore Fluttershy's Stocks = Bad as it is comparable in a way. Let me tell you there are quite a few rape stories out there. The ones I write are about Eventual Consensual Rape and rather harmless compared to the normal Fall of Equestria stories.
But now I digress. To get back on track, the reason you talk like you do is because you have already made up your mind. And economic law says that people who have made up their mind have problems to change it. They stuck to their opinion instead of acting rationally. I personally don't like this stubborness we humans have. There would be less conflicts in the world if we would be more willing to change our point of view or at least try to be more objective to judge works fairly.
It is my own and honest advice. You should try out a different view about things. I'm not saying that I'm right of course. I'm pretty sure I have some points where I might act rather irrationally. God knows how many and what points they may be, but I try to be as objective as I can be. It's something I really recommend to anybody.
7354689
Well I was actually being entirely objective with my last comment. You made the point that, because Fluttershy's Stocks got a bunch more Upvotes and this story is basically the same, then the fact that this story has fewer upvotes is unreasonable. I pointed out that maybe it isn't that this fic got too negative of a reception, but rather that--again, maybe--Fluttershy's Stocks' reception was too positive.
Take two kids who write a paper for class. Their papers are of equal quality, yet one scores higher. How can you tell whether the one kid's score was higher than she deserved or if the other kid's test was lower than she deserved? You can speculate, but you can't say for sure.
I suggest not basing your response to this comment upon my dislike for Fall of Equestria, because my points here exist separate from that.
Further, as it pertains to our discussion, I don't care that there are other fics like this one or that there are even worse ones. I'm not talking to those authors about their fics. I'm talking to you about your fics. Don't point your finger at other people and tell me what they did, because frankly that excuse is a little pathetic. Own your own actions.
7354741
It is no speculation. I have about 40 cases that prove my point. Those cases being every Fall of Equestria story there is. You can't really say that they are all bad, until you have read them all of course. I might not have read them all, but I have read about five or six. Enough to say that they are downvoted not because they are poorly written. Therefore my conclusion that my fic got downvoted because the name Fall of Equestria is in the description. It is a conclusion based of the works of others and the downvotes of those stories.
Of course there is a possibility that my story here is crap, and I will admit I'm not the best to judge it, but I don't really see much of a difference between this story and my other stories. I noticed that out of my four stories, the two tagged with rape received more dislikes, and I also noticed that this one tagged as Fall of Equestria received even more dislikes. My conclusion therefore is that certain tags might have an influence on the received downvotes. And that is completely independent of the quality since I don't think (again, this is pretty subjective and an outside observer would have to agree with me for this to actually become objective) that my stories are all that much different in terms of quality. At least it seems different that the more rapey my fics get, the more dislikes they receive.
I know that I'm just a beginner when it comes to writing clop, so I'm sure I make much mistakes and my work might be mediocre, but that doesn't mean that my works have to vary so drastically in quality. It seems rather unlikely, and the more likely option seems to be that certain tags appeal less to readers than others. At least that's what I conclude from the little bit of experience I gathered this few moths since I started writing.
7354771
I won't say they're all bad--even though most of them are--but I will say they're all disgusting. And I despise things that disgust me.
7354787
Then don't read them if they are not in the range of your fetishes. I'm not reading gay clopfics for example and therefore you will never find me commenting on one saying things like 'Hopefully this will be the last one!'
I understand if you dislike themes like rape. It is an understandable thing to do so. And I can also see why people dislike Fall of Equestria, but this simply won't die off because people don't like it. Just the opposite, there is still art of it posted and I doubt it will stop anytime soon. Sure, maybe the stories decreased, but it is just something that exists, just as fetishes for domination or gangbangs. And like I said sometime before, as long as no one is harmed it shouldn't really be an issue for anyone.
7354826
See, I can read any published story I want on this website, a capability that I often exercise. When people say things like "don't like, don't read" it just makes me want to read and comment more. Just because I don't like something doesn't disqualify me from commenting upon it. I certainly can't make you write or not write something, but I sure as hell can throw in my two cents.
On the other hand you can definitely block me, but I'm pretty sure I've been civil about this.
7354853
Why exactly should I block you? Just because we don't share the same opinions?
Well, I'm not going to stop you from commenting if that's what you want. It just seem a little strange to me that you comment on a story you have clearly no interest on.
7354890
I just like to cover all bases, and saying "Nyah Nyah you can't stop me from reading and commenting" isn't quite true.
7354901
It is, however, kind of silly to seek out things you don't want to read so you can be angry about them and complain about their existence in the comment section of said story. Because, frankly, you have nothing useful to say. It's just complaining.
7354910
I could totally find a bunch of places where I'm not complaining.
7354853 Yes, but it makes a lot more sense that if you don't like it, why would you read it?
7354938
Sometimes you do things just because you can. Maybe I want to check and see if my disdain is justified or if I should change my opinion.
7354955 Fair enough.
7354163
It's actually a mixture. I'm actually a fan of the fetishes and subject of FoE but every story in the setting is just garbage. I still read a new one that pops up on my feed every now and again in the hopes that someone is introducing quality to the sub-fandom and it'll spread, but that doesn't tend to happen. This is the general stance among other people I talk to with the same fetishes as well.
Like in this particular one I'll forgive the spelling errors and simple grammar errors as there a was a warning that it's unedited, but the phrasing throughout is just terribly awkward and detracts from the entire thing. It's simply badly written. Amusingly Fluttershy's Stocks is better written in my opinion, though it has it's own share of issues. I've actually expressed a few of my issues with parts of that author's writing in other comments.
What it comes down to is that while there will always be some people that downvote based on content, but that doesn't magically mean the story is good, the setting is good, or that all the downvotes are 'haters'. They're judged on the genre and how well they're written.
7354959
Not just "some". FoE stories have incredibly harsh ratings that other stories with similar premises and less literary quality don't. Even the one that is praised as good by the loudest critics (Bruised Apples) has a horrible rating. So, it's more 'haters', really.
7354959
I thank you for your honest critique. I just read through it again and edited it. Seems like I overlooked a few things. Probably because I didn't have that much time yesterday. It should have less mistakes now.
For the phrasing. I'm still just a beginner and am working to improve my writing. That is why I appreciate your opinion on the topic!
It should be "save her" just a small nitpick
I'll just add this to my clop later list.
7357326
Thanks for reminding me. That was the second time in a row I forget to check over the description again! I probably should be more attentive!
This is total nonsense as Discord isn't stupid enough or ignorant enough to fall for a trick from the Caribou that would not only make him into a female, but also sex crazy.
The only reason why I'm not saying this is total *Bullshit* is because this is not canon. If this were canon, I would go even further into why this is contradictory and simply and utterly illogical.
Cold-Blooded's only Fall image is one of my favourites. I like to think the garrish overreaction of several users on the image's thread is the only reason he refused to take another one of non-creepy_nickname's commissions. For some reason, they only overreacted because the artist was Cold-Blooded, but I cannot imagine why anypony doesn't think of him having an equivalent level of extreme fetishes as Replica or Poprocks. :T
7358751
Among other reasons why this story is stupid that I won't even go into... it got Discord's anatomy wrong. And it's based on a picture where the anatomy was correct, which makes the fail even worse.
"Eris" cannot cross her legs in a way that stimulates her genitals... not without magic, anyway. Discord's tail is part of his body. It's not like a pony's tail, where there is a rump, a place where the main body essentially ends, and an extension of the spine coming out of that, and legs that have nothing between them but the groin. If Discord tried to cross his legs in "pee dance" position, where they are crossed directly at the groin rather than down by the knees or ankles... he can't do it, because his legs are on the sides of his tail, and the tail is where his genitals are. His legs just don't cross that way. With magic he could do it, but in this story "Eris" somehow... doesn't have magic, though there is absolutely no decent explanation given for why not. Typically for Fall stories that are not critical of the source material, caribou just have whatever abilities the plot requires without any real explanation of how they work or whatever.
Also, penetrating Discord from behind would require raising the tail... which is not like a pony tail. It's heavy and long, more like a leg than a tail. It's not impossible, but it's very hard to do without bondage or very active cooperation and participation from Discord. The description basically implies the caribou just put "Eris" into that position by manhandling her into it, but that would be awfully hard to do -- not as impossible as the legs crossing thing, but it makes it seem like the author wasn't even bothering to visualize a draconequus while writing these scenes.
I mean, there are a billion other things wrong with this story but at least some of them I'd have been able to avoid if I'd known what the word "sluttification" meant ahead of time. This particular issue of the anatomy, though, was something I figured no one else would bring up, precisely because there's so much else to complain about.
7354257 Take it from someone who saw the birth of FOE from the start. The storyline is shaky at best. FOE is what it is and let's just leave it at that.
On another note, I can honestly say this is the most...tame FOE fic I've read. It can almost pass as a regular clopfic. Never thought it could be possible.
7358904 Poprocks can, and has, draw things that can be considered worse than FOE images to some extent. He also is one of the main artist for the Zebra Domination thing that's going on around. Replica kinda likes FOE like WishyWashy does. Phathusa, I really don't know about her, but I think it's just because of the pay. CBT got a lot of shit for his image, but I honestly don't know why, it wasn't all that bad if I'm being completely honest.
7358904
Actually if I recall a lot of the overreaction was people objecting to me pointing out that this was, probably, the most likely explanation for what had happened to Discord in Fall, because the thought that Discord would continue to allow a society where there's basically only one kind of sexual interaction allowed (no male on male, no genderplay, no masochistic male, no sadistic female, no dominant female, no submissive male, no female on female except as a show for males... not even sexual possessiveness, because males are expected to share their slaves... oh my god how boring could you get) to exist if he had the power to stop it is inherently absurd. And there were people trying to convince me that no, of course what the caribou said about Discord voluntarily helping them and being on their side can be taken at face value because rape vines are just like giant mutant rolling cabbages.
We know that Dainn has Mary Sue level powers and no good explanation where he got them. We know Discord supposedly helped him. We know Discord hasn't been seen in canon. We know Discord can be tricked by someone who seems to offer him friendship but is actually out to use and discard him for power. We know what happens to males who dissent against the non-stop sameness of "males sex-obsessed heterosexual misogynists, females dehumanized powerless slaves who are used for nothing but sex" society the caribou built. We know Discord is sufficiently possessive of Fluttershy that if he were around and had any power, she wouldn't be "owned" by a beastmaster servicing animals, she'd be owned by Discord. And we ought to consider it bloody obvious that Discord would never approve of a society that can't think of anything except the need to constantly reiterate its sexuality and misogyny, because Discord doesn't like things that have no variety.
For some reason, though, people seem to want to believe that no, Discord is backing the regime and at full power and is totally okay with all of this.
This particular story is absurd, unbelievable and massively out of character for Discord, but the image it's based on seems to me to be an absolutely "realistic", given that any of Fall is even close to realistic, explanation for where Discord is in the Fall universe... in a position similar to Luna or Rainbow Dash, a black collar who is not in any way "voluntarily" participating in any of this anymore, but probably too broken by guilt to fight back as much as either of them do.
7358987
Even if your critique is quite harsh, I thank you regardless for pointing such issues out for me. I never wrote a clopfic with a draconequus before and therefore seemed to overlook the obvious anatomy problems. I will go back to it on a later date where I have more time and see that I correct these mistakes!
7358995
I'm more into Eventual Consensual Rape, and therefore more into the tame side of things. For me to enjoy something, the female part of the act has to enjoy it too. It was planned to be tamer than the usual FoE, so I'm glad you agree with that point!
7359022
That's a good point, but I wouldn't have enjoyed writing a story where Discord is broken by guilt. I really like things that end up consensual, and in FoE this was the only way I saw for Discord in his position to be consensual with their actions. But maybe I should have let him interact with Fluttershy more. I think that might have improved this story.
I did not think I was going to like this, but well done!
Yes. The nigh-omnipotent Spirit of Chaos is totally a pushover.
You might want to consider that it's not the FOE that's getting you downvotes, so much as the crap characterization and absurd world building handwaves required to make that setting function.
7376912
Even a being like Discord can be defeated with a plan. At least I think that's your point. I don't see why the Caribou who took over the world in the FOE setting should fail with his capture.
I really only mentioned his capture and was getting right to the action if this was what you meant with world-building. I was not sure how to best fit it into this, but it might be a point to consider once I work this over.
And yes, I know that not there are downvotes because of such mistakes, I only doubt that ALL downvotes are because of that. My experience in writing is that tags have an influence. For example, I have written four stories in the last one or two months. All vary in the like-dislike ratio. Most interesting is, the more rapey they get, the more dislikes they receive. That's of course just a theory, but it is something I noticed over the small amount of time I spent writing. And it is also something I will observe with interest in the future, as I find it quite fascinating.
But I digress now, don't I? In any case, I thank you for your critique!
I don't would like to point out. Spells, minus the elements, are probably ineffective on discord. Plus, won't she just outlive them all? Wouldn't the invasion make him stronger?
7359010
If I think of it, the rage fit may have been exclusive to one or two commentators who made twenty, thirty-ish comments centered around strawmanning and white knighting and all those other wacky buzzwords. I'd have to go back and read them again, which I sort of don't want to do. lol
Only reason I clicked on this was to see if someone had actually written a believable scenario for the Caribou to take down Discord, or at least wrote a poor idea well enough that it works.
I got neither and am disappointed.
Outside that, I can't really fault the clop. It's written somewhat well and I'm sure if rule 63 is your fetish, then it's all well and good. Honestly though, this is just another story that puts clop before any actual plot. Granted, you did the clop a bit better than most, but that's about all the praise I can give.
7691202
after reading author's portfolio, why are you still expect anything of quality?
11181624
Do keep in mind this was back in 2016, nearly six years ago. So I have no idea what I was thinking then, although given my reading habits I probably clicked on the story without investigating the author.
That said, I think at the time I was also kinda...angry, with Fall of Equestria as a concept. I see it now as just another maledom excuse setting for some darker fantasies. So that probably influenced my earlier comment.
Glancing at this now, it's more or less what I said way back. Clop. Not the best clop, but certainly not the worst.