Working on ruling the world. Chillin with villains, relies on me myself and I. And is known champion in competitive God slaying.
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Here I am, thrown in as a changling Queen far before the Canterlot invasion, watch as I- A: make my whole race terrified of me B: overthrow a changeling god! C: die, a lot. D: all of the above.
What do you think?
.....wait a minute.
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It's goofy, silly, and stupid...
I LOVE IT!
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
20:34_12/13/2016
...Wrong orifice.
Also, unless this is randomly the GodQueen of the Changelings, I'm pretty sure she's holey and not holy.
7792685
Yeah, I was just trying to be more humorous than accurate
(Does actually know where eggs come from)
Storks, duh.
>what do you think
I think a downvote is in order
Interesting idea, I like this, keep up the good work
Amusing vey amusing
7792973 lol, we have given you our votes
Read me... later.
Okay, this has what I call (perhaps in ignorance) niche appeal. I mean, it's a wacky, somewhat rushed (with some talking heads syndrome) approach to a tasty/enthralling idea. If you continue and have them characters strongly developed I'll no doubt read this, despite the aforementioned.
You know, since the general idea has been overdone to death and back again (somehow), what amounts to enjoyment are the characters. So please, don't kick the proverbial puppy and flatten the characters. That does not mean they have to stop being silly; I enjoy that goofiness, and I know you too.
I will follow it and see how it goes. However i hope this won't be another fic where changelings and equestria eventually become friends because friendship, it has been done so many times and im sick of it.
(ur fic tho, do what you want)
7792685 All there in the manual.
7792685 do not mock the holy holes.
edit: aaand tracking.
Cutaway gag to this Queenling in a bar, snapping her hooves (somehow) at a few ponies, giving them a look, and a whole group then cutaways to sprawled in a bed.
7798566
Sorry, i fixed it.
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/e5/01/6e/e5016e4d0188525e0d8edfb30e104087.gif
I'll be keeping that in mind though.
7798594 Oh it's OK! Everypony makes mistakes but it helps to make them funny ones.
This story is so redicules it actually kind of works
Also you deserve to die for that pun how dare you
I'm absolutely loving this thing, I hope to see more soon
! P.S. what is going to be the queen's name? I doubt that it'll be her human name, so could ya' maybe make it a reference for me, like oh... say... Kerrigan? I think that'd be great.
The changeling race is fucked. It seems like their culture is built around cultural stubbornness. Bring a human with half a brain into the equation and it all of their "traditions" will backfire due to the sheer impracticality of their lifestyles.
I love stories like this where we can flaunt our superior minds and glory to lesser races.
I hope to see more! Love the story!
Hmm, she took the whole egg laying thing much better than I was expecting. And the amount as well, so little. I was expecting she'd lay enough eggs to make a shiny hunter green with envy. Overall though, pretty good chapter.
7799079
Kerrigan... it looks like I'll have to consult the forces of dickery on that one
Your outcome seems favorable.
7799691 ThankyouTHankyouTHAnkyouTHANkyouTHANKyouTHANKYouTHANKYOuTHANKYOU!!!!!
It isn't bad so far, but it could really use a once over with an editor. A lot of easily fixed mistakes. I would recommend getting a proofreader if you don't have one. I'll stick around until I can't stand the errors. Having a good idea for the story line definitely helps with that. Still, fix those mistakes.
Oh Kerrigan!
Oh Kerrigan!
The rest fall behind!
To Kerrigan!
To Kerrigan!
The world's greatest Changeling mind!
... Well maybe eventually.
Thank you so much for using my suggestion!
This story is stupid......but it's the good type of stupid :)
I feel like your writing process involves vomiting rainbows onto a keyboard.
Keep it up.
7854564 do i wanna know?
7867841 The queen's name, it was my suggestion.
7867881 oh
7867881 kinda anti climatic
More, please. We want to see what shenanigans Kerrigan shall do.
TOASTER LUNA DEMANDS MORE CHAPTERS!!!
I like this. Please update soon. This is amazing. Also funny.
Well a nice story it is.
.....The description of her appearance gives me A PLAN!!!!!(Ps PM me if you want to hear it)
Why does her apperance remind me of the pony form of the marker from Fluffle puff?
7931180
i.ytimg.com/vi/8Fg4O7G96Yw/maxresdefault.jpg
No idea.
Umgi? Umgi!?
Oooh, that little scamp of a dawi grub better be grounded. I mean, he's technically correct, but calling your mother shoddy? That's a grudging.
7935097 He means hungry
As always short but very entertaining can not wait for the next one :)
F*ck I want next chapter now.
This should be fun.
I love this! I love all of this!
Is there a weekly update schedule?!
nice i want more
Shits about to go down.
Hey did you know you got featured today?
7935463
Yep
You changed the point of view here, from that of the main-character to that of an omniscient narrator. It is not only confusing, but also breaks immersion by having the reader look over it again so he realises what happened.