Twilight's been meaning to ask.
Rated teen for alcohol and dick jokes.
I didn't originally mean for this to be my entry into Aragon and Friends' THE COMEDY (IS SERIOUS BUSINESS) CONTEST, but it worked out perfectly.
Content Warning: wildly waveringly written drunk dialogue. And a pun.
Reading by SNinja! Go support him on YouTube!
Gee, Tempest, how come your mentor lets you have two wands?
Not even remotely sorry. Not given this story. Which, for the record, is more fun than it has any right to be, even if you do explain the joke. Thank you for it.
You bastard.
You absolute, magnificent bastard.
8708479
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/10/4/113598__suggestive_artist-colon-the+weaver_applejack_spike_applejack+season_applespike_exploitable+meme_gee+bill_hotdog+meme_implied+foalcon_implied+he.png
Glad you enjoyed!
8708488
I'm not proud but I'm not sorry.
8708498
You should be proud.
Goddamnit Tramp
8708516
Okay, that was great.
y.yarn.co/cac6ca72-c915-4087-b64a-3e3df1cad88e_text.gif
Bruh
This reminds me of the 'knick knack paddy whack' joke.
Good shit.
LOL great short shot. Reminds me of a little song snippet I wrote sometime back with this ship. (No I'm not telling you the original lyrics, you gotta figure it out yourself )
I know you want it,
I understand the pain inside
Outcast and now a rebel
Trapped in a world with a hopeful promise
Never did you think he'd be dishonest
A new world awaits both us now
Don't be shy love, I'll supply love
I got you girl, oh I got it girl
With your broken horn
Scar on your eye
Purple plush armor adorning your sexy thighs
Everybody's afraid of you, you ask for it all
But I got what you need
Fizzle I got your love, I got it all
Hold your dance balance don't you fall
Tempest 'll be at the party just one talk
You don't gotta ask me
Friendship is knocking at the door
You used to come to the party
To pluck the ponies of all the magic
You always come to the party
High up and demanding
Don't lie with it, lie with it,
The door swings wide open now
Enter the crowd and dance with me
8708553
Sis
8708583
Sounds 80s-ish?
8708588
Nope. Hint: Early 2010s and R&B
8708596
shoot my weak spot.
8708600
Don't sweat it, I'll reveal it: It's "The Party & After Party" from the mixtape "House of Balloons"
That was aweful. Don't stop
8708600
for massive damage?
So then how did she actually get so tall? By eating meat?
8708724
Think you can maybe spoiler that there, pard'ner?
Brilliant
8708726
Apparently, no, I can't. So I deleted it instead
8708802
NO U
8708588
My dude
Wait why is she so tall tho
8708913
8708677
The answer is actually pretty pedestrian, but Iâll add an epilogue in a few day so.
8708926
Is she a human
Does she know the sacred geometries!!!!
This is what happens to drunkards.
This one-shot is great! Gave me a smile all the way to the end!
I will be tracking this for the offered epilogue.
8709095
Glad you enjoyed!
That... does raise a question; why are some mares taller than others? Age? Or genes?
8709095
Hope it lives up to your expectations!
Cheesy Crust
Jesus Christ
Lol
Yup, it makes complete sense.
Twilight wanted to get in Fizzly's pants, and achieved her purpose.
I know this is intended to be a dumb and silly little joke-story... but we have literally seen at least three normal mares taller than Twilight off the top of my head. Fleur De Lis, Sassy Saddles, and Mistmane (and possibly Inky Rose, who is slightly taller than Rarity, who's almost the same height as Twilight). So even at a base conceptual level this entire setup for the joke makes no sense.
8709299
I know
The picture in the A/N is hilarious.
P.S. Congratulations on the feature.
Money for nothinâ
Chicks for free.
8709309
That little pony has her own jet airplane!
That little pony is a millionaire!
8709304
Thank you ! :)
Classic
Oh you mmmmmother...
Well played.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Goddamnit.
Again.
~Skeeter The Lurker
I am not getting that ending at all, nor the helpful tidbit video at the end. Help a person out? I really liked this though. Idk what it is, but I love fics that involve ponies getting drunk and swapping stories.
8709526
almost all the words rhyme with the first lines of the MLP theme song iâm glad you enjoyed it anyway!
8709518
Hehehe
She's a big mare.
8709528
OH okay! Yeah, I noticed that part, but I thought you were mad-libbing it so I just remained confused :'D
derpicdn.net/img/2017/10/19/1565475/full.jpeg
Mark Knopfler reference?