Loss

by Pwnyta

Chapter 5: Apology

Chapter 5: Apology

Ding! The faint noise caused the light-blue coated pegasus to stir from her sleep. She lifted her head from the pillow to investigate the noise, looking around the room for anything that had fallen or been misplaced. Her eyes still clouded with sleep, she shrugged and buried her head back into the soft cloud pillow, pulling her sheets up over her nose. She readjusted her body into a more comfortable position on her side, letting her exposed wing fall lazily across her body. She closed her eyes and began to drift off to sleep once again.

Ding! The pegasus grumbled. The doorbell’s ring echoed through her home until the sound finally faded. Rainbow Dash turned over onto her other side, sighing. She secretly hoped that the pony at her door would give up, go away, and start searching for her elsewhere in Ponyville. She kept her eyes glued shut as tight as she could comfortably, refusing to give up the darkness her eyelids lent her, keeping her oblivious to the day that continued on beyond them. The multicolored-maned mare enjoyed staying in bed in her house. It allowed her an escape from the constant reminders around the town of what had happened just a short time ago.

Ding! Ding! Ding! The consecutive rings resonated through her house, causing the pegasus to sit up with a frustrated scowl across her face. “Calm your flank! I’m coming!” she yelled out as she opened her eyes and wiped at them. She hit the mattress with her hooves in frustration before kicking the sheets off, leaving them crumpled at the end of the bed. She spread her wings and flapped them in a lazy fashion, lifting herself a few inches from the ground and guiding her through the hall towards the front door.

She heaved a sigh as she grabbed the handle and pushed the cloud door open, revealing a bleak, gray sky cast out in front of her as far across Equestria as her vision would allow her to see. On the steps in front of her were two fellow pegasus. The closest to the door was a white-coated stallion. His wings were unfurled to their full length, at least twice the size of Rainbow Dash’s, giving him an intimidating and demanding presence. His mane was a bright yellow, cropped short to allow for minimum need to style it, a task that was hard for any pegasus to accomplish. He wore a blue coat emblazoned with the logo for the Cloudsdale Weather Factory, with a small white patch on the right side of his chest with the single word “HEAD” in black across it. His cutie mark was a dark gray cloud with three bolts of brilliant yellow lighting shooting out from it in zigzag patterns.

Behind him stood a mousey-looking pegasus mare. Her coat was a light shade of pink, a shade pale enough to mistake for white from a distance. Her mane and tail were a dark purple, each strand styled into elegant curls, flawless enough to rival even Rarity's. Her eyes were hidden behind a large, round pair of glasses. Her cutie mark was a small trio of red hearts, each one with a pair of wings attached to them, as if they were going to come to life and fly right off her flank. A clipboard was attached to a device around her neck, and she held a small pencil in her mouth, scribbling down notes, oblivious to the situation that stood before her.

The rainbow-maned mare felt her eyes widen as she recognized the importance of the two ponies that stood in front of her. “S-s-s-sir!” she stammered, before clearing her throat. She took a breath to regain her composure. “Hello, sir, it’s an honor to have you at my doorstep” she said, feeling a pit in her stomach beginning to form.

The stallion simply smiled at her and stepped forward. “Miss Rainbow Dash, is it?” he asked hypothetically. “It’s a pleasure to meet the prized pegasus of the Cloudsdale Weather Factory, however, I’m saddened that it is under these circumstances,” he continued, shaking his head and looking at the ground for effect.

Rainbow Dash knew what the visit was about already. She could feel the pit growing with each passing second as the conversation continued. “What do you mean, sir?” The pegasus feigned ignorance. She decided it best to let the head have his moment of importance considering the circumstances.

“Please, Miss Dash, no need for the formalities. Call me Thunderhead. You’re just as much an equal in my eyes considering the hard work you do every day for the weather factory and the ponies of Ponyville,” he said before clearing his throat. “But that’s beside the point. I’m here today, Miss Dash, to discuss your lack of performance in the skies of Ponyville these past few days,” he began to explain, giving her a stern, intimidating look.

The mare felt her shoulders sag a bit, consenting to the point that her superior was making to her. She looked up in the sky again, hoping that magically the clouds would have dissipated. “I’m very sorry si-Mr. Thunderhead. I’ve just been feeling a bit down about what happened to my friend and I guess I haven’t been paying attention to my duties as much as I should have,” the pegasus said in an attempt to explain herself. She felt a large hoof come to rest on her shoulder. She looked back towards the stallion that stood in front of her.

“Miss Dash, we completely understand the tragedy you and your friends must be going through after your loss. Be that as it may, you cannot keep using it as an excuse to avoid your duties,” he said. Rainbow felt her eyebrow twitch at the statement. The idea of someone calling it an excuse did not sit right with her, but she pushed it aside, simply thinking of it as a poor choice of words by her boss.

“It has been over a week since you have even touched the clouds around Ponyville. If I remember correctly, every one of those days has called for a sunny, cloudless day,” Thunderhead continued.

Rainbow Dash hung her head “I know sir, but-” she began before being cut off.

“But nothing, Miss Dash. I understand that something can be upsetting, but it can’t cause you to neglect your job,” he said. He gave her a stern look before breaking his pause. “I, myself, had to deal with the hardship of the Manehattan weather disaster. If I let it get to me the way you’re letting this get to you, then I’m not sure I could have ever become the head of the Cloudsdale Weather Factory,” the stallion finished, an accomplished look crossing his face.

The multicolored-maned mare felt her face transform into a look of pure hatred and anger. She stepped back, glaring at the weather factory head. “Now wait here just a minute!” she started, the anger causing her voice to increase in volume. The stallion simply ignored the looks and pressed on through the scolding.

“Miss Dash, I am afraid that if you do not pick up your act and make sure the weather stays on schedule, starting tomorrow, you will be searching for a new job,” he concluded, closing his eyes, and giving her a look of superiority. This did nothing other than simply anger the mare more.

“How dare you compare something so trivial to what I’ve gone through!” she yelled, causing the weather head to open his eyes in surprise. She stepped forward, right into the stallion’s face. His aura of intimidation gave way to that of fear. He took a step backwards, putting himself at a comfortable distance from the mare. She began to bare her teeth, narrowing her eyes at the yellow-maned stallion.

“You know what else?! Keep the job! Good luck with a replacement. It’ll take ten ponies to do the job I do!” she screamed at him. The light-blue coated pegasus kicked off the ground and flapped her wings furiously. She flew off towards Ponyville, pumping her wings as hard as she could, putting as much distance between her and the insensitive stallion as possible.

The small, pink mare stepped towards her boss. She gave him a worried look, dropping the pencil from her mouth and into a holder on the clipboard. “Should I put up a notice for the job opening in Ponyville?” she asked the stunned stallion. He blinked a few times blankly off towards the distance.

Thunderhead bowed his head and sighed, rolling it from side to side. “No… No, she’s right. We would have to hire ten pegasi to take care of Ponyville the way she can. Well, at least ten,” he responded, with a smile. “We will give her a few more days. Come along, Heart Flutter. We should be getting back to Cloudsdale shortly.” With that, the pair of pegasi took off into the sky, quickly gaining altitude and bursting through the clouds before turning a course towards the large city in the sky.

~`~`~`~`~

The rainbow-colored mane whipped back and forth against the light-blue back of the pegasus, objecting to the speed of the wind flowing through it. Her matching tail trailed behind her, holding on to her flank for dear life, appearing as if it would dislodge at any moment. Rainbow Dash simply ignored it, grinding her teeth together as she worked through the frustrating thoughts in her head. She pumped her wings up and down, continuously building speed as she soared quickly over the rooftops of Ponyville. How dare that stupid stallion! I have half a mind to fly right back there and kick his flank! How can he ever compare such a thing to Rarity being gone! The pegasus thought as hot, angry tears began to well up into her eyes. She slowed down her pace and began a path towards the ground as she wiped at her sad lavender eyes.

Rainbow Dash landed with a few quick steps before slowing down to her normal walking speed, letting the remainder of her rage dissipate with the tears as they dried up from her eyes. She gave a small sigh as she looked at the dirt path in front of her. A small squeak of surprise made the pegasus look up. A pink earth pony stood in front of her, one of her front hooves hanging in the air as she was interrupted from her next step. Her blue eyes were wide, as was normal with the hyperactive pony, but they were filled with surprise until she recognized the pegasus that stood before her. The pink pony put her hoof down onto the ground and gave her friend a wide smile.

“Dashie! I’m so happy you could drop in on me today!” Pinkie Pie said in her normal bubbly fashion to her friend. The pegasus rolled her eyes and turned away from her friend, walking towards the town, but the party pony didn’t take the hint. “Where are you going Dashie?” the pink pony asked as she bounded towards her friend. The rainbow-maned mare felt a tad annoyed at her fellow pony’s overactive personality especially considering the circumstances.

“Now is not the time, Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash grunted towards her friend, picking up her walking pace a bit to try and escape. The party pony persisted, however, bouncing up and down a small bit behind the pegasus. The light blue-coated mare felt extremely annoyed by her earth pony friend, finally stopping her walk and closing her eyes, her eyebrows furrowed in an angry manner.

“Pinkie, how can you be so happy?” she asked hypothetically, stopping and turning around to face the party pony. Pinkie Pie stopped bouncing and sat herself on the ground, a smile plastered across her face. She looked at her pegasus friend with her wide, blue, innocent eyes.

“Duh! Because I want to be!” She responded with a giggle. “How can you be so angry, Dashie?” she shot back as her giggles turned into a full out laugh. The pegasus gritted her teeth as she began to bare them towards her friend in anger. How can this stupid pony be so stupid?! She thought to herself as she stepped towards her ignorant friend. Pinkie Pie simply smiled blissfully at the act of intimidation.

“I’m angry because we just lost our close friend, if you didn’t forget,” Rainbow Dash replied with a hint of hate in her voice. The party pony simply blinked, her expression unwavering as she awaited the rest of the pegasus' explanation. “And for you information, I’m angry because I lost my job!” she continued, her voice teeming with anger.

“Oh Dashie, of course I didn’t forget,” she replied, giggling. “But I do find it a bit silly that you decided to lose your job. Do you need help finding it?” she asked, turning her head from side to side, feigning like she was looking for something. After a moment, she turned to face her friend again, her innocent eyes displaying a bit of ignorance towards her rainbow-maned friend’s anger.

“No, Pinkie, I don’t need help finding it. It’s lost because I got fired,” Rainbow Dash growled, “and for someone who didn’t forget, you sure are a little bit too happy about it right now.”

“Well of course I’m happy! I’m always happy! Why aren’t you happy, Dashie?” the earth pony replied with a smile. The pegasus couldn’t take it anymore. She screamed into the air and stepped into the face of the pink pony that stood before her.

“I’m not happy because I never got a chance to apologize! I tried to at the hospital and she wouldn’t let me! I let Rarity die without being able to tell her that I didn’t mean to upset her!” Rainbow Dash yelled into the earth pony’s face. The pink pony stood unfazed by the whole reaction, simply blinking while holding the smile that ran across her lips during the whole outburst

“So go and apologize, silly!” she replied to the pegasus. She giggled at the stunned look that had come across the multicolored-maned mare’s face. “Duh!” she said one more time, rolling her eyes as she turned and bounced away from her friend, continuing on with what she had been doing before she was interrupted.

Rainbow Dash sat herself down on the ground in a shocked silence for a few minutes processing what her party pony of a friend had said. Despite the carefree attitude about the whole situation, the light-blue mare couldn't help but think that the earth pony was right. She felt her brow furrow as she pawed at the ground before she stood up. She kicked off the ground into the air, heading back into town. She had a friend to visit.

~`~`~`~`~

Rainbow Dash landed in front of the oversized gateway, its two pillars dwarfing the pegasus. She looked up at the engraved stone archway supported at the top that informed her of the cemetery that lay before her. After a few seconds of hesitation, she walked forward, her hooves giving their last loud clops before stepping onto the soft, nearly silent, dirt path. She followed the path, looking from side to side as she made her way through the silent resting area. During the funeral, she never took the time to observe the natural beauty of the area. Trees with long, wispy branches hanging low towards the ground gave the appearance of eternal mourners, sitting over various gravesites, crying tears of green as the wind caused leaves to occasionally shake themselves from the branches.

The endless pasture of green was only interrupted by the occasional grey or black headstone that sprouted from the ground erratically. Many of the slabs were beginning to show their age with cracks, while some had pieces broken off altogether. Rainbow Dash wondered if her friend’s gravestone would reach such a state when everypony else had moved on from Ponyville. She shook her head from the thought as she stepped off of the path and towards a short row of headstones.

Rarity’s grave lay a few yards from the path. The pegasus was careful to not step on another gravesite as she made her way towards her friend’s resting place. Grass had begun to sprout from the overturned dirt, creating a mixture of bright green and subtle brown. The gravestone that stood behind the dirt and grass mixture was a bright white, the marble-like textures the only flaws in the large stone slab. Engraved into the face of the large stone was the name of the dressmaker, with the three small diamonds set in the same design as her cutie mark. The light-blue mare stopped at the edge of the overturned dirt. She examined the gravesite closely, a small sniffle from her being the only break in the overwhelming silence that the cemetery provided.

“Hey Rarity,” the mare said, kicking a front hoof casually as she looked down at the ground in front of her. Her mind felt blank when it came to say next. How do I talk to someone who isn't here? She asked herself. She looked around the graveyard, scanning for other nearby ponies, hoping she could copy what they were doing to honor their loved ones. She quickly learned she was the only one in the pasture as she focused her attention back to the resting place that lay before her.

“So… um… I’m not sure how to say this,” she continued. Rainbow Dash bit her lower lip. She had never tried to apologize to anything but a pony standing in front of her before. She scanned the gravesite up and down one more time, giving a loud sigh. She could feel her stomach knotting up with every passing moment, kicking her hoof even more to distract her from her feelings. She blinked her eyes a few times, feeling the warm wetness as it began to bubble up beneath her eyelids.

“I’m… well, that is…. I’m here to say…” she tried again. She blinked a few times to clear her vision as tears began to fill her eyes as they had so many times in the previous week. Rainbow Dash felt her legs grow shaky. She dropped down onto her knees, bowing her head and gritting her teeth before finally giving in to her emotions.

“I’m sorry Rarity! I’m so sorry. I never meant to cause you any trouble,” she yelled out, sobbing loudly as she buried her head in her front hooves. “You were right! I had no right to leave you like that,” she continued hysterically. Tears flowed freely down the pegasus’ cheeks, wetting her fur and turning them a darker shade of blue. She looked up at the gravestone one more time, sniffling as more tears blurred her vision.

“I w-wish I could go b-back and change t-things. I-I would h-have s-stayed and helped y-y-you,” she sobbed into the ground. She grinded a hoof across her face in an attempt to wipe the tears from her eyes, but they only seemed to be replaced. She could feel her eyes swelling from the constant flow of salty liquid from her body, but she ignored it as she continued to sob loudly. Her mind was jumbled with thoughts.

What if I had stayed? What if I had simply just been patient enough to help her out? Would she still be here today? What if I had just apologized at the party? The rainbow-maned mare thought to herself as she was unable to speak any further. She looked up at the gravestone again, letting the tears run down her cheeks, muddying the soil below her. I wish I had the chance to know how you felt about all of this she continued to think as she closed her eyes, a painful grimace overcoming her face.

It was then that a white leg wrapped itself around the front of the pegasus’ chest. She looked down, her eyes widening at the sight of the hoof that lay upon her. She gave a small gasp as she shot a look at the gravestone, hoping the words upon it had magically changed. However, her surprise quickly turned back to a grimace as she noted that the name and image had not changed upon it. She looked back down at the leg across her chest, noticing that it was now a familiar pink. She raised a hoof up to the foreleg and pushed it up towards her face, rubbing it against the fur on her face in silence, trying to gain what little comfort she could from it.

“She heard you Dashie, and I know that she loved you no matter what happened,” Pinkie Pie cooed into her friend’s ear. She allowed the pegasus to turn around and wrap into a full embrace around her pink neck. Pinkie Pie patted the light blue mare on the back, running her hoof through Rainbow Dash’s mane a few times as she let her friend cry into her shoulder. “Knowing Rarity, she forgave you before she even came to the party,” the pink pony continued to whisper into her friend’s ear.

The words had a soothing effect on the pegasus. Her crying slowed gradually and eventually stopped. As she wiped away the last of her tears, she looked into the blue eyes of her earth pony friend, studying them. She felt the question surface in her mind as she took a deep breath to sigh before asking it. “Pinkie, how can you truly smile so soon after everything that has happened?” she asked her friend.

The party pony flash a smile to her friend, already expecting the question before it came. “That’s easy, Dashie. I know Rarity would be sad to know I couldn’t act like myself without her around. I still feel as bad as you are feeling, but as long as I act like myself, I know Rarity is smiling down upon me,” she explained. Rainbow Dash took a minute to absorb and think about what her friend had said. After a few moments, a smile began to come across her mouth.

“You know, Pinkie. You’re right,” she said. She took a step forward and placed a hoof on her friend’s shoulder “Thank you, I really needed this today.” The two ponies smiled at each other for a moment before facing Rarity’s gravesite again. The sun had begun to set in front of them, casting an orange glow across the pasture. After a few moments of silence, the two friends walked back to the path and out of the cemetery, heading their separate ways.

~`~`~`~`~

The sky was a flawless blue in Ponyville the next day. By the time Celestia had risen the sun, every cloud had been cleared away. The sun beamed brightly onto the town square, giving it a gentle and welcoming warmth and bringing about an air of joy as everypony seemed to have a smile across their face that day. Pinkie Pie stepped out of Sugarcube Corner and looked into the sky, a grin plastered across her face as she stared into the endless blue sky. Looks like a certain silly filly found her job again! The party pony thought to herself as she bounded into the town square to begin her antics.

A certain pegasus was absent from the festivities in the town that day. Her multicolored mane whipped through the breeze that was generated from the speed of the flight. She pumped her wings every now and then to maintain the speed she was going. Rainbow Dash had a look of determination across her face as the Cloudsdale Weather Factory came into sight. As much as she hated having to speak to the insensitive head of the factory again, she did have an apology to give and a job to keep.

Comments

[ugugg93]

Not going to lie, before Pinkie came back to the cemetery, I was thinking, "Well shit, she's lost it."

But I'm really liking this story. Sad, but good.

DAMN YOU RARITY! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LEAVE US!!!

[Glassed]

Nice to see that they are starting to cope with it
This is a really nice story, I have to admit
-Glassed

[Super]

Well done. Very emotional

[AlexUk]

Awesome chapter

[Chrisgamer]

Nice job

138174
The stories with the less adventurous and more realistic deaths are the ones that get to me the most. After reading another story, "Spark," and its sequel one-shot during the summer, I felt like the series was over and done. It took me two months (!) to get over that feeling.

"Loss" is so well-written that it has threatened to do the same, precisely because it is so canon-possible.

I was in a mix of these emotions:

[PonyPuffy 2012]

Very well done, I really like how you handle Rainbow and even though Pinkie seemed a bit "aloof" at first her reason for maintaining her typical Pinkie perkiness made her sound in character

[ElementOfFlutterSwag]

Again, I shed my not-so-manly tears. But this story is so well written, I absolutely love it. Great job, truly

[videogamehunter]

I'm glade that Dash finally had the courage to apologies to Rarity for something he did. Even though it wasn't his Fault or Rarity. But I'm also glad that Pinkie is helping a friend in need. Good Story. Please keep up the good work.

[Steel Resolve]

good story, please let the rest of the six recover, kill any more off and I won't be able to take it.

[LunaUsesCaps]

Um... Okay...

Giving my honest opinion here, this story should have ended right on chapter five. I don't exactly understand what the point of continuation is?

[Pwnyta]

139433

I can understand where you're coming from, however I do have my reasons for continuing the story a bit longer. Without being as spoilerific as possible, these reasons are:

- I have yet to address any real reaction from Fluttershy, much less mention Fluttershy short of her funeral monologue and being present at the hospital
- Twilight has a few parts of her story that still need tying up
- There are still a few emotional mechanisms that I would like to address (albeit, one of them might make people very, very mad or offended that I am going to take the story in that direction).

There is strong reasoning for that last part as well, which will be explained in an afterword I am including when I post up the final chapter. I'm not sure if your comment means you would rather not read the story any further, but if you choose to continue reading, then I hope it can still be as engaging and entertaining to you as it has been!

[LunaUsesCaps]

139542

Of course I'm going to continue reading, it's just that when I read chapter five I thought that was a great way to finish the fic - until I saw the incomplete tag. It just confused me.

Truly magnificent story. Brings me to tears everytime.

[windtitan]

I thought this chapter was stronger than the others. Well done.

[Fluttrick]

I'm into reading sad fictions and I have to say that yours is amazingly sad, though not My Little Dashie sad. I love it none the less and can't wait t'ill the next chapter. (5 STARS) YAY!!

[Thunder Splash]

Absolutley fantastic story. I couldn't stop crying when Pinkie Pie showed up and said her part in the grave yard. I remember when i finally had that realization after the loss of a loved one. It felt like the weight of the world was lifted off of my chest. You captured the moment and the emotions perfectly. Very relatable and very believable and powerful. I applaud you sir, and i look forward to the next instalment. Keep doing what you do brony, and i look forward to see where you take this story.

[Dashie02]

That was a beautiful story !!I felt sad when rairty's gone

[SaintlyVirtue]

A very good chapter, keep it up!

[Dr. Dusty]

I can't wait to hear how fluttershy is dealing with it. I can't wait to read more.

[Longshot]

I cried a man tear .

[Caesar555]

I'm starting to think pinkie pie is like yoda

[ajacobs899]

One of these days I will cry again. I cannot give up until I succeed. This story may not have given me the tears I ask for, but it tells me that the place to look for them is in fimfiction. The last time I think I actually cried the way this story makes me want to was during junior high. I know my quest is nearing at an end, and I must go on until it does.

[Borg]

I'm not sure Pinkie's behavior during the first part of the chapter is quite right. It's hard to say for sure, since she does have a tendency to come on too strong, and she is pretty unpredictable, but I feel she wouldn't be quite so Pinkie in that situation. I think she knows that right now is a time to be a bit more subdued than usual, more like in the cemetery.

And I don't think that stallion from the weather factory deserves an apology.

[unicorn92243]

Rainbow's boss is a jerk!