The Greatest Slugger of Them All

Source

Scootaloo arrives home one day, breathless and asking Auntie Lofty to do a presentation for Family Appreciation Day. Unfortunately, Scootaloo only wants the one part of Lofty's life she's not that eager to share.

An interpretation of Lofty's past featuring a popular sport.

Takes place just before and during "Family Appreciation Day".

Written for Bicyclette's Lofty and Holiday Contest.

Chapters (3)

The Wind-Up · 31st Jul 2022 · 2,394 words
2,394
Download .txt
Download .html
The Pitch · 31st Jul 2022 · 2,283 words
2,283
Download .txt
Download .html
The Home Run · 31st Jul 2022 · 1,358 words
1,358
Download .txt
Download .html

Comments ( 8 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 8
- Newest First
- Oldest First

Zaveryn

Zaveryn #1 · Aug 1st, 2022 · 2 · · The Home Run ·

Beautiful story. A great example of slice of life - I wouldn't mind reading more chapters of just Scootaloo learning more about baseball and her and her aunt's relationship.

twidash1993

twidash1993 #2 · Aug 1st, 2022 · 3 · · The Pitch ·

I'm a little surprised she didn't play for the Seattle MAREiners

libertydude

libertydude #3 · Aug 1st, 2022 · 1 · · The Home Run ·

11317698
Everytime I think I'm done with a story, somebody like you always comes along and thinks of a legitimately good sequel idea. I think if I was to do a sequel though, I'd want to show a story with Aunt Holiday as the focal character. I mentioned in my blog that I wanted to focus on just one of the aunts for this contest because I suspected many of the other submissions would focus on the duo instead of just one of them, and I wanted emphasize that every parent has a story before they met their forever partner. Finding a way to do something similar with Holiday would probably be the route I'd take if I ever did a sequel to this story.

11317792
Dang, I should've used that.

fanreader999999

fanreader999999 #4 · Aug 2nd, 2022 · 1 · · The Home Run ·

Nice.

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #5 · Aug 22nd, 2022 · 2 · · The Wind-Up ·

“Shoot, we should just attach a windmill to her!” Lofty guffawed. “We’d get enough power to last us the rest of the year.”
With a firm but gentle hoof, Holiday reached out and grabbed Scootaloo’s wheeling form. Fortune landed Scootaloo right-side up, though her eyes continued to spin for a moment in her aunt’s grasp.

hehe, this is a fun cartoon gag rendered through prose! all of it is very Scootaloo.

“Indeed it does, Scootaloo,” Holiday said, grasping Lofty’s hoof with her own. “She’s as much family to you as your own parents.”

a bit of ironic in the most common interpretation of Lofty and Holiday being present for much more of Scootaloo’s life than her biological parents.

“He is not cute!” Scootaloo huffed. “He’s cool! And besides, you’ll be talking about an important part of Equestrian sports history!”

it would be very on-brand for Scootaloo to insist that her crush is just finding another pony cool, which is why it would be hard to distinguish the two cases.

“And when she was done, she turned to me and said that she hoped for my sake that Lofty would come or else everypony would think I’m a liar and that’s even worse than being a blank flank and-“

really liked this bit! this was just so on-the-nose Bully Diamond Tiara. she is very good at her job!

Scootaloo nodded, but it seemed more like an automatic reflex than a cognizant response. Her mind was far away, tabulating how much strength she’d need to get through tomorrow when Diamond Tiara saw no ball-playing aunt and the whole school would whisper about whether there was a cutie mark for lying, then laugh upon noticing Scootaloo didn’t even do that right because her flank was as blank as ever.

and oof! exactly the fear Diamond Tiara would want to incept into Scootaloo’s head. “cutie mark for lying”, haha.

“I’m fine, Holly,” Lofty whispered back. She looked down at the box. “Besides, Scoots was right. This is a part of me. Maybe not a fun part, but a part nevertheless.” She heard the rustle of Scootloo rummaging through the closet. “And if I have to dip into that part to knock a little humility into a bully and make my niece’s life easier, well… there really wasn’t any other option, was there?”

aww, yes! exactly what i would do as Scootaloo’s aunt, which is help her defeat every child.

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #6 · Aug 22nd, 2022 · 2 · · The Pitch ·

“-And that’s how I helped build Ponyville’s roads!”
Lofty clopped along with the rest of the schoolfillies, though with slightly more enthusiasm than the children could muster for the burly stallion in a hardhat standing at the front of the classroom. The fellow either didn’t seem to notice the children’s disinterest or took the reaction in stride. With a quick nod to Miss Cheerilee, he gathered up his tools and made his way toward the door.

honestly it pains me to see that the next generation has such little interest in as vital a thing as infrastructure. if i were there i would be very enthusiastic!

Her dark cerise coat contrasted against the brighter classroom, yet her welcoming smile and calm face still radiated a warmth that made her seem right at home in the pastel-laden environment.

aww yes Cheerilee is the best

Nothing but friendliness filled her face, yet Lofty could see a gleam in her eyes not unlike that of a wolf spying a lonely sheep.

a fishermare always sees another fishermare from afar.

“And, despite what you may think, quilts actually are a big part of our Equestrian heritage. I was born and raised in Seaddle, and a lot of the early Equestrian settlers there weaved pictures into their quilts that told stories. Some of them were of famous ponies of old, like Flash Magnus and Meadowbrook.”

aww, i like this idea of Lofty using quilts to illustrate her storytelling

Unlike today, where mares and stallions play together in the Equestrian Baseball League, we used to separate mares and stallions in baseball.

i thought “Marejor League” was a needless pun, which was great, but it turns out to be relevant to the historical worldbuilding, which is neat!

Cheerilee placed her face in her hooves. “Teachers don’t give instructions anymore, just suggestions,” she muttered under her breath.

aww, poor Cheerilee!

“But even Berry Bons couldn’t stop me from getting these each year.”

i mean would this story be complete without famous ballplayer pun names

Lofty knew that look; she’d seen it on a dozen pitchers who suddenly realized that she wasn’t any ordinary batter. This was a batter the pitcher had to hate, to truly despise to work up the energy to get them out. Diamond Tiara couldn’t just take the loss and go back to the dugout, thinking over her mistakes and planning for the next game. No, she needed a win now, and if she couldn’t get that at Scootaloo’s expense, she’d get it at Lofty’s.

on top of the very well-done baseball metaphors, it is so great that Lofty is taking her enmity with a child so seriously!

Lofty withheld a chuckle. Clever little filly, she thought. Despicable, terrible, and definitely a future business tycoon, but clever all the same.

oh yeah i cannot wait to stan problematic Diamond Tiara when she is older.

“Oh no, Diamond Tiara,” Lofty said with the same counterfeit honey in her tone. “I simply got bored with baseball after a while. Things get awful boring when you become the best.”
Diamond Tiara’s visage darkened. A master of subtle insults, she could tell a rebuke from a mile away.

nice! take that, child!

“Sometimes being happy is better than being the greatest.”

aww, a good lesson for a grown-up to share.

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #7 · Aug 22nd, 2022 · 1 · · The Home Run ·

“Blech!" Scootaloo gagged. "‘Fun’, ‘friend’, and ‘Diamond Tiara’ don’t even belong in the same sentence together.”
Lofty shook her head. “Hopefully that will change one day. But for now, I think we succeeded in humbling her a little.”

prescient! and yes, it would be hard for Scootaloo to believe at this point that Diamond Tiara could change. it is funny looking at it as adults now, knowing just how much change there is to come

“We both left, Scoots. The exact same day, he and I woke up, looked at each other, and realized at the same time that we weren’t happy. We couldn’t say why at the time; we just weren’t. So we both got up, said goodbye, and left the same day. Haven’t seen each other a day since.”

sometimes it’s just like that! just growing apart and not being happy in the relationship anymore. very true to life!

Lofty smiled. “That’s right, Scoots. Quilting was always there for me, but Holly took some discovery on my part. That was fine though. I don’t think we would’ve loved each other the same way had we met earlier in life. I needed to discover myself a little more before I knew she was the one.”

and that is the truth! we wouldn’t have been in the right time and place to meet the people in our lives weren’t it for everything that had happened before it, both good and bad.

“Maybe you could, slugger,” Lofty said. She gave a loving pat to the box on her back, its heavy contents no longer feeling like a burden. “Maybe you could.”

this was a sweet story, and certainly satisfies its goal of rounding out the past of Aunt Lofty, especially since she could have had many lives before the age we see her in the canon. and most shipping stories do focus on young adults getting together, so it’s nice to see a couple that found each other later in life, even if that took place offscreen here.

Despite what we like to think, our parents didn't just meet each other from the get-go. There were a lot of messy bumps between here and there. Hopefully we'll be stronger after these bumps, but we can only hope.

it’s a good lesson to keep in mind, and a great one to end the story with. thanks for writing!

Comment posted by Patriots3492 deleted Aug 28th, 2022

Viewing 1 - 50 of 8
- Newest First
- Oldest First

libertydude

Featured In8

Stats

FIMFiction

Follow & Support Us

libertydude

Also LikedSimilarAuthor

Featured In8

Stats

FIMFiction

Follow & Support Us

Also Liked Similar Author