Miscellaneous

by Mobius of the Moon

Chapter 5: Mistakes Have Been Made

It had been a few days since the “manticore mercenaries” incident. Quill and FIlter were walking through town to get food for the next few days, and to get some things for Ratchet, when they saw the pink pony that was Pinkie Pie bouncing up to them jovially.

Quill debated running, then decided to greet the mare, since he saw Filter obviously wasn’t going to.

“Hello, Pinkie!” he called.

“Hiya! I wanted to ask Poppy a question,” Pinkie responded.

Both stallions looked at her in confusion. “...‘Poppy’?” Quill finally asked.

“Yeah! Poppy! Pop, Poppy!” The pink pony giggled at the nickname. “I like it! Don’t you?”

Quill snickered and looked at Filter, who had decided to occupy himself with studying the structure of a nearby house. “So, ‘Poppy’, going to say hi?”

Filter turned to his friend with a glare. “Don’t. Call. Me. Poppy.”

“What about her?” Quill gestured to the mare. “Your girlfriend?”

“That’s it, I am out of here.” The unicorn promptly turned and walked away, blushing furiously. Pinkie and Quill shared a confused look.

“Dude, just listen to her question,” the semi-pegasus said, flying in front of his friend. “I’m not letting you wuss out of this.”

“There’s a pretty big difference between wussing out of something, and getting ticked off and walking away.” Nonetheless, Filter obeyed and walked back to where Pinkie was standing, now looking at a ball she had procured from Celestia knows where. “...where did you get that?”

Pinkie looked up at the unicorn and smiled. “Oh, I always keep balls stashed around Ponyville in case of a ball emergency!” She tossed the ball over her shoulder.

“So...anyway, what did you want to ask me?” Filter had decided to ignore the ball and just change the topic.

“Welllllllllll...first, are you busy tonight?”

The blue stallion’s eyes widened immensely. He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. He turned to Quill, silently begging for help.

“He’s not, Pinkie.” The semi-pegasus grinned wolfishly. “In fact, he can do whatever you want him to, well into the late hours.”

The look in Filter’s eyes very plainly said I am going to murder you in your sleep. Assuming I plan to wait even that long.

“Awesome!” Pinkie declared. “Think he could drop by Sugarcube Corner at, ohhh...seven tonight?”

“Of course he can!” Quill declared before the unicorn could say otherwise. “Right Filter?”

“Of…course…Quill...” the unicorn practically growled.

“See? There, done! He’ll see you then, Pinkie.” The semi-pegasus departed with another grin, his friend following.

The message in Filter’s eyes had changed to I will stab you with my horn as soon as you turn away from me. He proceeded to vocalize this message once Pinkie was out of earshot.

“Right, right, and you’ve told me that how many times now?” And, as was the ritual, he rose into the air, too high for his friend to reach him.

“I can’t wait for the chance to start shipping you with somepony,” Filter grumbled as he continued walking.

“Who’s to say I’ll even fall for a pony? For all we know, I might be in a relationship with a manticore, and then-” The semi-pegasus stopped in his tracks when he saw the growing grin on Filter’s face. “Don’t. You. Dare.”

The unicorn said nothing. He simply began to whistle to himself and gained a spring in his step.

---

The door opened as Quill trotted in, a mask of calm on his face, then went into the kitchen where he found Ratchet, eating a salad.

“Hey,” she waved a paw at him and continued eating for a moment, then asked, “Where’s FIlter?”

“Filter...” the semi-pegasus’ eyes narrowed. “That four-eyed, double-crossing asshole! I hate him.”

An amused grin passed over the manticore’s face. “And how many times do you two say that to each other in a day?” The grin grew as Quill conceded to her point. “So, what did he do to get you so riled up this time?”

Quill looked away, then down, then at the clock, but never directly at the manticore girl. “... Nothing… Anyways, I’m just gonna… nap. That’s it, nap.”

---

Filter glanced around nervously as he trotted through Ponyville, as if everything was preparing to jump out at him. It was a few minutes until seven; he had just enough time to get to Sugarcube Corner.

Even though part of him was nervous, the rest of him was excited. Is there a word for that? Nervouscited? ...no, that’s just dumb.

The confectionary shop appeared in his vision, and he swallowed nervously. With less than two minutes before he was asked to arrive, he lifted a hoof and knocked on the door.

He waited for somepony to answer, then jumped in surprise when the door quickly opened, almost cowering on instinct before realizing that it was just an enthusiastic Pinkie. “Um… hi, Pinkie.”

“Hiya!” The pink earth pony beamed.

“So… it’s seven. What did you want me here for?” He couldn’t shake the feeling that he already knew, but was still unsure.

“Oh, I just wanted you to taste my cupcake.”

“...wait, what?” Filter blinked, his brain momentarily shutting down.

“Yeah, my new cupcake recipe!” the bubbly pony grinned in delight, then pouted softly. “You want to, don’t you?”

The stallion blinked again, then nodded with a sigh of relief. “Y-Yeah...that sounds good...”

“Great!” She dragged him inside without any further ado.

---

Quill looked up from a book as his unicorn friend trotted through the door, grinning. “And what took you so long, young man?”

Filter looked at him. “Huh? Oh, sorry. Pinkie was really insistent on me tasting her cupcake.”

There was a long silence in which the semi-pegasus’s jaw dropped and Ratchet stuck her head out from the kitchen, as both said at the same time. “YOU DID WHAT?!”

The unicorn just nodded. “Yeah. That’s why she wanted to invite me over. Nopony else had tasted it before, and really, I’m kind of glad I was the first.” He shrugged. “A little too moist for my liking, but it definitely had a nice aftertaste. Could’ve done without the sticky white mess all over my face, but that can’t really be helped.”

Again, the long silence followed, but this time was broken by the thud of a book hitting a unicorn’s face.

“Ow!” Said unicorn rubbed his nose. “What the hell?!”

“You aren’t even in an official relationship yet and you go and… do that?!” Quill was in shock, but Ratchet was a different story. The manticore was on the warpath.

“DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF A POOR MARE LIKE THAT?! OR ANY FEMALE CREATURE IN GENERAL? I OUGHT TO-”

“...I have some rephrasing to do, don’t I?” Despite the screaming, all Filter did was raise an eyebrow.

“... You what?” Quill separated the furious manticore from Filter and sat her on the couch with him, and both stared at the unicorn, waiting for an explanation.

“What is there to explain? She wanted me to taste test a new cupcake recipe. Really not that big a deal.” Filter was appearing rather irked now. “What did you think I meant?”

“... Filter, you know what sex is, right?” The semi-pegasus went for the straightforward approach.

“Are you even more stupid than me?” Filter retorted. “Of course I do!”

“Then how about oral sex?” the manticore chimed in.

“...Oh.” The unicorn’s eyes widened. “Oh…oh.”

Needless to say, everyone promptly decided it was time for bed.

Author's Note:

Well, after a many many month absence, you get... one chapter! Ta-dah! Best. Birthday. EVER!
SO, Yoshi and I... well... I am more focused on school and Mobius now so... Yeah
Yoshi's doing... stuff.
That is all
Don't expect a new chapter for at least a month.

Comments

[tomla134]

Though I'd like some more exposition and physical description of "ratchet, the pony-sized manticore girl," I liek dis stahry. Also, the mention of "semi-pegasus" just confuzzles me. Either way, great story.

[SlashAttack321]

This is a good story keep up the good work!