Several rounds of I Spy later, it was once more Qwark's turn. "I Spy with my little eye, something beginning with-"
"If this is another sighting of the Z'Grute beginning with something other than Z," Nefarious began, "I swear to the Sleepless Gods and their Lorekeepers I will rip your belly open and hang you by a loop of your own entrails from this group carrier and let you fly around the city until you strangle or your guts break, just to see which comes first!"
Qwark was silent for a time. "...Z," he said finally.
"Z'Grute," Nefarious, Twilight, and Alister all said simultaneously.
Qwark gasped in shock. "How did you know?"
Twilight screamed in frustration. "Qwark, I love you to death, but if you don't change things up a bit, I will find a way to make that literal!"
"We could play 20 questions?" Qwark offered. As everyone nodded, he grinned widely. "I'll go first! I've already got one-"
"Is it the Z'Grute?" Nefarious asked.
"Wow you're good at guessing games!" Qwark marveled.
"Qwark," Alister grumbled as Nefarious and Twilight facepalmed and facehooved respectively, "not only have you picked the Z'Grute every time it's been your turn, you've also guessed it every time you were guessing at someone else's turn! And my first letter was Q!"
"There are limits to what's excusable for limited intelligence!" Nefarious snapped. "How did you get elected?"
"Sorry," Qwark replied. "I know I don't have that much brainpower, and what little I have I can't tear away from the danger the city's in."
Nefarious stared at Qwark in disbelief. "...okay, now I see how you were elected. If that's how your brain works, if you weren't my nemesis, I might have voted for you."
"The more he's in the limelight, the more public your confrontations will be," Twilight pointed out.
"Next election, I will vote for you!" Nefarious proclaimed, grinning widely.
The carrier finally came to a halt, dropping the group in firing range of the Z'Grute, which was close enough to fire upon. it attempted to fight them by electrifying the platform they were on and releasing shockwaves by smacking either side of the platform. Unfortunately for the Z'Grute, all four fighters were well adapted to combat such techniques. Alister had years of experience in addition to his natural cat-like grace and agility. Nefarious had given his robotic body several upgrades in anticipation of having to fight Twilight, Ratchet, Clank, and Qwark again. Qwark himself was in the best condition of his life. And none of the attacks the Z'Grute used could target Twilight when she hovered several yards above the platform to fire.
After a time, the Z'Grute pulled back, releasing a generator from a nearby tower to feed on to recover, but concentrated fire from the four combatants caused the generator to explode, knocking the Z'Grute back against a building, and sending it down, apparently knocked out.
"Well, that's another city saved, thanks to-"
"BBBFF?" Twilight interrupted. "Remember what we talked about with fall deaths?"
Qwark blinked, scratching his chin. "Uhh...never believe the bad guy's dead unless you find the body, and even then check for signs of cloning?"
"And how can this apply here?" she coached.
"Right!" Qwark confirmed. "Come on, men! Let's make sure that the Z'Grute is down for the count-"
"Hey!" Nefarious snapped. "Where do you get off ordering me around?"
"-so it won't interrupt when Nefarious and I have our dramatic clash!" Qwark finished.
"Okay, I can get behind that," Nefarious agreed.
Giggling, Twilight let Qwark take the lead as they moved to a launch platform, catching another ride on a wide beam they could grind on while they listened to the reporters talking about President Qwark's surprisingly high polls, most of which were attributed to Twilight. As they moved forward on the beam, the Z'Grute leapt up and began crawling after them on the beam.
"Like I said," Twilight told Qwark from her position on his shoulders, turning to shoot at the Z'Grute while they raced away.
"We need heavier firepower," Alister grumbled. "Any ideas?"
"We're approaching Zogg Tower," Qwark pointed out. "There are some fusion turrets on top. We could use them." Noticing the looks the others were giving him, he tilted his head. "What? I'm the President. I always read up on any new city or planet I'm going to if I'm going to make a speech. I have Zogg Tower's fusion turrets written down in my notecards, and was going to reference them as part of how I assumed I held the Z'Grute off in my sleep when I thought I'd beaten it already but didn't remember!"
Alister and Nefarious both stared at Qwark, stunned, as they came to the end of the grind beam. Twilight, however, flapped her way up to Qwark's head. "Good boy!" she praised, patting his head and offering him a cookie, which he devoured eagerly.
"I've heard of having heroes well trained," Nefarious quipped snidely, "but isn't that taking it a little far?"
"Positive reinforcement goes a long way with Qwark," Twilight replied as the group made their way towards Zogg Tower. "Oh, another weapons vendor!"
Alister shook his head, chuckling, as Twilight bought everyone a plasma bomb launcher. "Whatever works," he admitted.
Moving forward, their path came under attack by the Z'Grute...but it only used the same techniques as before, which were just as easily evaded. Some concentrated fire forced it to withdraw, allowing the group to take an elevator to the top of Zogg Tower...only to see the Z'Grute climb the opposite tower, draining energy from a new Lumenoid generator installed there.
"We need to get the turrets activated before it drains too much power!" Alister insisted. As he spoke, several enemy robots approached.
"Qwark, General!" Nefarious snapped. "You two guard our backs! Twilight and I will get the turrets up and running!"
"Why should I take orders from you?" Alister growled out.
"Because it's a good plan!" Twilight snapped back.
With the division of labor, it wasn't long before the attacking robots were destroyed and the turrets were activated, allowing the four to man the more powerful weapons. Unfortunately, the Z'Grute was surrounded by an energy barrier the Lumenoid generator was projecting, as well as occasionally launching explosive energy spheres at them.
"Qwark, Twilight, focus on the barrier generators!" Alister snapped out. "Nefarious, you and I will focus on the energy spheres! We're the better shots with turrets!"
"I was going to say that!" Nefarious complained as he connected his circuitry to the turret, taking direct control of its mechanisms.
Once the energy shield was down, the four focused all their fire on the generator itself, quickly causing it to explode, launching the Z'Grute so that it landed on the edge of the platform Twilight and the others were standing on, barely holding on with both foreclaws. Qwark and Alister acted quickly, smashing the claws with brute force and dropping the Z'Grute to the ground far below.
With the Z'Grute down, Nefarious turned to leave. "Well, it's been a lot of fun catching up...but I need to go check on Lawrence."
Qwark blocked his path, pulling the rest of his business suit off as he stood in his hero garb. "Lawrence can let you know how he's doing when he inevitably breaks you out of jail, after I've locked you up!" Qwark insisted.
Nefarious blinked, shocked. "Wow. It's...it's really hard to get used to you being this self aware and genre savvy."
"I'm so proud!" Twilight squealed happily.
At that moment, a massive ship appeared in the sky, warping the weather around it as it moved, generating a massive storm over the city, the clouds hiding the shape of the ship beyond what appeared to be a single glowing red eye. Alister gaped. "I thought you said the ship docked behind the moon was old?"
"That's not one of mine!" Nefarious insisted.
"Then let's steal it!" Twilight insisted eagerly, her eyes shining. "That kind of weather manipulating tech has so much potential!"
Nefarious stared at Twilight, his expression most closely quantifiable as religious exultation save for his avowed position of atheism. "...I'll have the computers at Château de délices surnaturelles hacked to give us a Friday reservation for two before the day is out..." he breathed.
Qwark screamed in terror as a grapple arm seized all four of them.
Twilight blinked as they were dragged into the ship along with the Z'Grute. "...if we come out of this without any new mental scars, sure."
"Best. Evil Plan. EVER!" Nefarious squealed happily just before they all lost consciousness.
This is funny as hell
Edit: first
Well this takes dating cat woman to a whole new level. Great chapter and I cannot wait till Twilight's Equestrian family meets her beau!
7129717 im really starting to hate the morons who claim 'first message' like it means something...
Not familiar at all with the game, but this is some funny shit.
7129731 first message!
So, Twifarious? I like, if it so. In which case: get the crew for the S.S. Ship!
Twilight has officially stepped into Kleptomaniac Hero territory.
Well... Looks like that's happening.
Wait a minute… In this fic, Twilight regularly totes around unholy amounts of firepower, she's a brilliant engineer, and now she's contemplating weather control tech. This is kinda reminding me of bits and pieces of Fallout Equestria.
7129774 oh great, now we got a Joker <pulls out a minigun> say 'hello' to my little friend!
7129731
Oh lighten up, we all know how rare it is to see something by a popular artist that does not have a whole lot of comments, besides, it was a edit which means it was a after thought.
as for the chapter, I love it when I find a story more entertaining then the source.
7129795 Hello!
Oh, and minigun? Say hello to my hybrid coil gun and power armor.
pic2.duowan.com/newgame/0807/79799162211/79799434208.jpg
7129748 you n' me dude... you n' me...
7129779
I second this, and am damn near convinced enough to ship it. Mind you, still holding out a bit, after all still a touch creepy on one level or another. Having said that though...well, let's just say the antics and the over-the-top nature of the world makes it hard to stop smiling. Having said that, part of me is TERRIBLY curious to see how that date would even go! Moreover, let's face it, with enough imagination Nefarious could possibly rebuild and edit himself into a younger form and mindset, still essentially himself with his memories, but literally working to the point where he could be more palatable as an individual to Twilight and crew.
Yeah, I'm a sick mind and the odds of such a thing coming up, let alone working are worse than my odds of winning the Lotto these days. But STILL!! Nearly on board with the ship, SELL IT TO ME, MIGHTY AUTHOR!!!
7129823 eh, small potatoes...try this on for size, Zen-Samurai Gattai!
7129853 what just happened to this thread?
I have noo idea what to say to that, so..... adventure ho!
7129925 trust me...its better if u DONT know...
Nice chapter, though I have to wonder if Twilight will end up rescuing the Z'Grute and adopting it. She seems to have befriended plenty of savage creatures in this universe.
And is it wrong to see if Twilight can make something that can clear the skies in 9 seconds flat
7129852 I actually suddenly pictured Rainbow making fun of Twilight, saying no pony could meet her standards so she built herself a boyfriend.
7129936 i'll take it.
7129853 ...
...
...
...
...
Wut...
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...
...
On another note...The C-14 can chew through that giant robot easily.
It was designed to damage tank (Not much, but, it does deal damage) and punch through power armor of its time. And its time is the space age where one behemoth-class battlecruiser (Around 3.7km long) with proper equipment can wipe out all life on a planet...and they later revive the same planet with some unmentioned terra-form technology in less than 3-4 years.
The gun itself is able to punch through 2 inches of steel (It is neo-steel, I think. Cause otherwise it would be pretty useless when all other war machines and armor are mostly made of neo-steel. And neo-steel is supposely tougher than the toughest metal we have today). 30 rounds/sec on full auto. Targeting system of the suit and the gun can help a standard infantry (The Marine) in reliably hitting many fast-moving targets in rapid succession at near 1km and shooting down starfighters that fly in range.
And those robots are a lot more fragile than the Terran or the Protoss war machines. So yeah...
But, if you want big war machine than...
img1.badfon.ru/wallpaper/big/9/76/starcraft-terran-tor-meh.jpg
7130116 Samurai Ha-oh is quite a bit bigger than anything u mentioned, is powered by 'mogukara' and isnt even the most powerful combination the Shinkenger have in their arsonal...Ha-Oh is formed from eleven Origami, but there is one more that can be added, Kyoryu Origami, or the 'Shark Zord' in the Power Rangers version (worst name ever in my opinion, as it didnt even look like a shark...) in any event, nothing short of another Sentai mecha ultimate combination even comes close to that level of power, since even the basic Shinken-Oh in larger than most buildings...and im talking skyscrapers here...
7130116
7130165
Both of you take this elsewhere.
Qwark 2016 xP
7130184 Haha, sorry.
7130165 We should probably stop.
7130201 Better than Trump. And if Twilight is there? He definitely has my vote.
well, on one hand, at least Twilight's willing to give the good doctor one chance. That's more than most would do for anyone.
7130291 Agreed!!
7129731 Of course it means nothing. It was a whim.
Every time I read this, it gets better and better. So much in fact, I'm sure I will be disappointed that when I'm playing the new Ratchet and Clank, there isn't a adorkable and occasionally terrifying purple pony.
That said, this story is just amazing and wonderfully silly. I don't know what it is you're using for inspiration, but could you please put me in contact with your dealer.
7130184 And here I wanted to end it all with this guy. People are always taking away my fun.
7129776 Well, if this is going to be a thing, sign me on for chief engineer.
Nefarious is getting lucky. A Lucky Dance for him!
stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/3972575/ikkaku-lucky-lucky-dance-o.gif
Me too Nefarious, and it's great.
7129983
7130240 agreed, i may have taken it too far...
7136810 Ah.
Well, at least the other things I wrote were true. And kinda neat.
7141166 or if he hit twilight first and sent Ratchet into a rage, that could have been a good alternative story wise
7140560 Mixing your scenes ya dolt!
Wait! I'm not the captain of this ship! Don't leave me here with the Twilight x Nefarious ship under critical meltdown!
7130116
7130165
Oh please. I'd like to see either of those take on a Warhound titan, forget a Phantom titan, let alone a Warlord titan, or forbid an Imperator Titan.
(Find me a single being that beats an Imperator and i will give you a fucking cookie)
oh, please don't let twilight go with nefarious.
twilight make brain hurt
7968444
Give me sizes and armaments and you've got yourself a deal!
7968444
Where do they get the Resources for that Crap!?
Imperium Inquisitor: My Idea's not Crap!
(Blueberry Crumple Muffin for the One who gets This Joke.)
7968444
Two words: Emperor. Titan.
9412974
7130116
7130748
7968444
NOTHING BEATS AN EMPEROR CLASS TITAN! unless it is a SEXY Gloriana class battleship~ I mean, HAVE YOU SEE THAT THING?!
7968444
The SDF Macross. From Lunar Orbit. Using it's Reflex Cannon. The one with a kill radius in space measured in miles (as in, missing by a mile is still a kill on anything that's not collapsed into a sphere under it's own gravity,) and where the blast radius for a ground hit is larger then most states...
That, or the Death Star. Destroying the planet is generally effective for killing anything on it.
Just remember, there's ALWAYS a bigger gun out there if you look hard enough.