My name is Captain Ares Andrews. I'm an AH-64 Apache pilot attached to the 101st Airborne division in Ft Campbell Kentucky. I'm not suffering PTSD, I didn't get sucked through a portal, or any of that nonsense. In fact, the last time I even heard the name 'Rainbow Dash', I was a college kid. That show went off the air like five years ago! But, regardless of when the last time I dove into the land of pony art and stories was, it doesn't change the fact that I have something in my house that fans of the show would probably kill for. And I have no idea how she got here, when she's leaving, whether or not she's even real. But she's here alright.

Princess Celestia will at last get a taste of Twilight Sparkle. No, not in that way! The whole Elemental Harmony Squad is involved... no, still not in that way!

Popsicles will be prominently involved... and again, not in a naughty way. The only naughty pony here is Luna.

When Lyra Proposes to Bon-Bon, Pinkie's zealous promotion of the noble wedding of the century attracts some unexpected and unwanted attention. Can Pinkie and her party ponies pull off the biggest wedding Ponyville's ever seen to give the two most deserving ponies a happily ever after?

Emerald is the typical Changeling Hatchling; curious, friendly, loving, and full of mischief. She wants to be important in the Swarm, but when she can't take the role she wants to play, she decides to leave. A choice that starts to bring up strange memories... Memories of playing outside with ponies....

Doomie has been trying to get out of the hive for a while now. Ever since that 'incident' with the wedding the queen has only one changeling out at a time to collect love. Now it was his turn, and he was going to collect it from the one pony that his queen doesn't want any changeling to go towards, and if that wasn't breaking the rules. He won't even disguise either. He'll just be original and surprise her by shrinking himself. This plan is full proof.

When Sweetie Belle magically derails one of Twilight’s experiments, she finds that she and Rainbow Dash have switched bodies. While Twilight works on a way to remedy the situation, Rainbow and Sweetie try to live each other’s lives as if nothing has happened.

Which might have worked out, if the weather team hadn’t needed Rainbow’s help. Or if Diamond Tiara hadn’t decided to pick on Scootaloo.

In the wake of the interrupted wedding of Princess Cadence and Shining Armor, the Royal Guard went on a changeling hunt, fanning out throughout Equestria to find any changelings living amongst ponykind. The captured changelings have been confined to a guard barracks in Canterlot.

Meanwhile Princess Celestia is finding herself swamped with petitions from ponies across Equestria asking for amnesty for their changeling friends, colleagues, and lovers. Princess Luna, who has been itching to regain some responsibility since her return, offers to take on the petitioners... and the changelings.

(sex tag for off-screen births and hinted baby-making)

After their defeat at Battle of the Bands. Sonata goes back to school to learn and make friends. The only trouble is not the fact she was a Siren bent on global domination but the fact that she might not be cut out for school period.

Twilight Sparkle has obtained the combined power of all four princesses of Equestria. Wielding this power, she confronts Lord Tirek, but the result of their fight is a tie. When he holds her friends hostage, she is forced to make a difficult choice.

All is not lost, however: one force remains in Equestria that could give her the edge she needs to defeat her foe, save her friends, and restore the world. She need only retrieve it from Zecora and place it around her neck...

Runner-up (one-shots category) in the Twyrant's Kingdom Competition.

Story inspiration: Corruption of a Desperate Mare, by Chris Wöhrer.

Edited by NightWolf289, AugieDog, and Prak. Thanks also to Pascoite for his WRITE review.

Rated teen for gore and dark themes.

Featured on:
Fimfiction.net Feature Box (05/12/14)
Equestria Daily!
The Royal Guard's Fic Spotlight #10.

This story is 100% approved by Twilight's Library!
Approved by Nonpareil Fiction!

This story is a sequel to Cafeteria Control

After witnessing abuse at the hands of Adagio and Aria, Pinkie Pie comes to the aid of Sonata. The two quickly hit it off and a friendship is born… much to the dismay of everyone around them.

Cover art used with permission from siansaar.