This story is a sequel to Schadenfreude

Schadenfreude. A name known throughout the castle, and frequently spoken in conjunction with the phrase "Oh, hell no." He's annoying. He's an expert at annoying the crap out of ponies. And he's Prince Blueblood's butler.

He also loves his job.

Join Schadenfreude as he regales with the tale of how Princess Twilight tries to correct his Cutie Mark.

It's a doozy. Or not.

(New cover art by the fantastic TodayIWriteFanfics!)

With a name like Schadenfreude and a special talent for either finding or setting off all those little nuances or annoying ticks that just drive ponies mad, you'd think he'd spend most of his time in prison. On the contrary.

He's Prince Blueblood's butler.

Actually, he does get thrown in the dungeon a lot.

Here's just one of those instances.

(New cover art by the fantastic TodayIWriteFanfics!)

One night, just like that, Celestia realizes she's going to die in less than twenty-four hours.

Proofread by:

• Selbi
• Neko Majin C

Featured on EQD!

Polish translation made by Dolar84

[HEY!] Sorry Tentacle lovers, no dirty material here. Just a Lovecraftian horror and silliness[/END]

So ya, I'm here in a land with magic and I just so happen to be a unicorn. I kinda shut out the cupcakes and parties and games and friendships cause I wanted to be the wizard that did It. What ever It I decided It would be. I wanted to meet the main characters, eventually, but I never expected I'd be the antagonist of an episode starting as a hapless chump swinging around via outsider tentacles! The summoning wasn't supposed to do that, I swear!

Now I need to explain to the Princesses that I was just trying to gain the power to control fire and not summon a dark lord of, of, whatever it is. Well, I mean, I was, but it was just supposed to give me power, not escape! Huh, that sounds kinda nefarious now that I say it out loud... do you think they'll buy that it was just so I heat up my house with a fireplace without needing to haul and buy wood all the time? No? And it's still bad even then? ... crap.

AN: My attempt to write a random comedy inspired by my shoe. What? It's very inspiring. Also, this is not a self insert. I wouldn't worship Celestia's butt like he does. I'd have started a cult for it.

I finally saved up the money. I finally had a costume I felt was sufficient. I finally got to go to Botcon. As Soundwave. I even practiced his special disturbing walk cycle for extra effect. Granted, I had to do it all with a missing Laserbeak, but hey, I could always roleplay that the little bugger was off on reconnaissance.

Then I saw a way to skip that little mistake altogether: A perfectly sized, articulated Laserbeak, with straps to hold it on properly. I didn't even think about it. I didn't think about why what appeared to be an entire prop shop was set up in the middle of a con. I didn't think about what the chances of this particular prop even existing were. I couldn't even be bothered to think about the creepy dude wearing a creepy hooded robe working the booth as he chuckled at my enthusiastic strapping on of my perfectly-sized addition.

Now I'm in the world of ponies, and have been turned into one of the most technologically-advanced villains of a completely different universe. Nothing to do now except make myself useful, I suppose.

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And thus, I throw my hat into the ring with all the other LoHAV stories. I've been wanting to do this pretty much since the whole trend started, but couldn't figure out which character to use. Let's see how this goes, shall we?

There are two very important things to remember when you cross realities:

1) Every living thing that sets foot in Equestria gets magic if it doesn't have it already.
2) There are three pounds of bacteria living on and in the human body.

Everything goes exactly as expected when two alien cultures meet.

The Power Ponies are coming again.

Another escape from custody, another scheme to take over Maretropolis, and another chance for the Power Ponies to defeat her. Such is the cycle that Mane-iac has endured for as long as she can remember.

And she's sick of it. She's sick of all of it. Now on the cusp of one more battle with her nemeses, she can only think of how much she has sacrificed for the city in her battles against the Power Ponies, and how much more she can take.

Find this story and more in a print copy! Just click these words here!

First place winner of the Everfree Northwest Fanfic Competition!

Thank you to Prak for editing help!

Featured on Equestria Daily 4/27/14

Just as Luna has Nightmare Moon, so too does Celestia have another entity in her mind. An entity with one aspiration:

Inspired by this.

Golden eyes and a large, curved front tooth were the first give-aways. I was changing and I knew it. I was changing into the monster from my dreams, no, my nightmares.

That wasn't all though. He left me a last little gift as he called it, sending me into a deep slumber only to awaken inside the room of a large white horse with a horn and wings. And she did not look happy.

Adjusting to a land filled with ponies is hard, adjusting to a land filled with ponies whilst you can feel your body and mind change is harder.

I had hoped that if I write down my memoirs I would escape him, escape his influence and his power and his alterations.

How wrong I was. Now I can only recite my tale as I feel the last shards of my sanity leave me. As I feel him beginning to take over.

You can find the artist of the picture at: Poor Yorick
I'll add tags/characters later depending on what I plan for this.

We all know how this goes, don't we? Some unlucky schmuck goes to a Halloween party or convention dressed up as someone evil, gets sent to Equestria, and then ends up antagonizing the locals.

Well my story goes a bit differently. My name is Isaac Donohue, and after a night of drunken partying that I STILL can't remember, I wake up in Equestria fifteen hundred years before the events of canon with five seemingly random superpowers:

Angelic Physiology, so I'm frickin gorgeous now. Oxygen Independence, so I don't need to breath. Asexual Reproduction, just call me Mister Mommy why don't you...Bubble Breath, something useless that I rarely use. Power Replication, otherwise known as a game breaker.

So anyways I befriended everyone's favorite draconequus Discord, and we made such beautiful chaos together. Well, it was more of me trying to reform him before he got stoned by the Princesses in an effort to change history for the better. What a waste of time that was, and as a result of this I got petrified as well for being his accomplice. Can you believe that?

Since I'm free, I've decided to settle down and rule a kingdom of my own. I'm sure there are enough tyrants in the world that need to be overthrown despite Sunbutt's best efforts. But if there aren't any, I'm pretty sure I can steal the Crystal Empire from Sombra before Shining Armor and Cadence do.

The only problem is, THE LAW WON'T STOP CHASING ME!

A LoHAV story that I'm writing as I go on.

ANNOUNCEMENT 6/4/2017: I'm sorry, but this story is cancelled. This has been a long time coming. As I've progressed as a writer I look back on this story with increasing amounts of disgust. Still, I know people enjoy it for some reason which is why I'm leaving it up for posterity's sake. Maybe I'll completely rewrite it from the ground up in the future, but that time is not now.