The Child of Technology
By: White Dragon
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Chapter 5: Go Potatoes! I Chose You!
(Luna’s POV)
(In The Royal Kitchens)
Me and Tech were just sitting down in the royal kitchens. I was eating a hay burger with some fries on the side while Tech was having a salad, we were about to finish up and go finish up, (if you know what I mean), when Celestia walked in.
“I thought you had Day Court?” said Tech confused. I looked back to Celestia and noticed a tinge of red-orange in her coat. BRAIN I NEED A DISTRACTION, (brain on lunch break, back in 5min), WHY BRAIN WHY??
“So the weather is nice today is it not, DEAR SISTER of MINE?” I asked hoping to distract my sister. My sister looks at me and gives me a mad smile.
“Luna if you would excuse me, I need to have a little chat with Tech,” she says with a rule giving tone.
“Actually I think that-eep!” I squeak, as Tech pinched me on my butt.
“Luna I will be fine, go back to your room, I'll be back,” he says as he bites my ear, “Later…” I give a little moan, and try to stand up. I say try because the second I got off the stool, I fell to the ground, on my face, Hard. I hear Tech give off a little laugh as he picks me up with his magic. “Luna be a bit more careful.” I get surrounded by a bright light and I reappear in my bedroom.
“Fine.. just go ahead and teleport me..” I sigh. Hmmm, what other fetishes does Tech have? I look around the room and spot a long length of rope. Hmmmmm...
(Tech’s POV)
“So Celestia what did you want to talk about-,” I ask as I turn around and I see Celestia charging up a BIG spell. BRAIN DO SOMETHING!! (Brain is still tired, please try again later). Really, Brain? I grab the nearest thing to me and throw it.
“GO POTATOES, I CHOSE YOU!” I yell out loud, the potatoes fly through the air and one land on Celestia’s horn canceling her spell. The others hit everywhere else on her coat and mane. She gives me a dirty look.
“Really? Potatoes?” she asks with a small sigh. “This is going to take forever to wash out.”
“Well SOOOORRRY, i'm still a bit iffy with you and magic,” I say rolling my eyes. Celestia gives a small sigh at that. We both stand there for a few minutes, “soooo… I should get back to Luna she made me promise that she didn't want to feel anything after i'm done.” I give a nervous smile to Celestia, she gives a grossed out bleh of disgust. I start to walk out, before I hear,
“Wait.”
“What is it Celestia?”
“Just promise me this, that you will treat her nice and care for her… please.”
“...”
“You don’t have to promi-”
“Ill do it, I will kill Discord if he breaks out again and tries to harm either you or Luna, I will love your sister as much as I can, I promise you this.” I wave my hand and a storage portal appears, I reach my hand in and pull out a scroll. “Here.”
“What is this?” Celestia asks confused.
“This was going to be my bargaining chip if the throne room had gone down hill,” I say with a small smile.”I have nothing else to bargain my life with if you want to turn me to stone.” Celestia gives a small gasp.
“But, what is it?”
“This is a spell I made while trapped in stone, it drains Discord’s magic.” Celestia gives a another small gasp as I leave the kitchen, and I hear a thud of Celestia hitting the floor after fainting.
As I was headed up towards Luna's room using one of the empty hallways, I hear a pretty voice call out,
“Shining where are you?” I stop and make my way towards the noise and stop as I go and hide in the shadows.
“I am here my sweet Cadence,” Shining says as he lifts her up in the air. I sigh, young love. I'll ruin it in a bit. “Why are you here?”
“I had heard that you had gone up against a great and terrifying beast that was made of metal and magic.” Cadence asks concerned.
“Don’t worry he was an easy beast to beat,” Shining says grinning. I sigh and round the corner coming up from behind them when I lean on the marble wall.
“HA. I don’t think women like, liars Shining,” I say with a grin. They look at we quizzically.
“How DARE YOU!! This is Shining Armor, Captain Of The Royal Guard!” The Pink Alicorn yells at me. “YOU… WHATEVER YOU ARE!!” I look down and sigh.
“Allow me to introduce myself,” I grab my necklace and break it. The second I do that the armor dissolves and flows around me quickly gathering in mass and height. A few seconds later I stand in my full height in my armor and look down upon them, “Technology, Man Of Machines and Bringer of Death, and Luna’s Boyfriend.” My armor shrinks back down and turns back into a necklace. I was about to leave when I shouted back, “Hey Shining, you might wanna train your guards better, I didn’t do anything while I sat there, and by the time they stopped they were the ones that were tired.” I leave with a big smile on my face, and Cadence fuming at me and Shining Armor.
Back at Luna’s Room
I opened the door to Luna’s Room, with a sigh. “Luna I-” I stop what I am saying the moment I see Luna. She had some how gotten herself all tied up. Like actually tied up, her wings were bound and her hooves were tied to the bed posts.
“Oh, thank the Maker it’s you Tech, if it would have been anyone else I would have been very embarrassed,” Luna says with a VERY shy smile.
“...Luna…”
“Yes, Tech?”
“Have you ever been dominated?”
“Ummm.. no?”
“Well you're about too,” I say with a happy grin and I summon a paddle and a ball gag, as I walk towards Luna.
(3rd Person POV)
QUICKLY RAISE THE SOUND BARRIER! SOUND BARRIER RAISED! Good…, that was a close one anymore sounds and I would have had to change the story to mature. I know right and no one would want that. <.<, >.> ya no one would want that to happen, <.< >.> You gross me out you know that? Well you're the one thats been writing so far. Touche… Thank you but can we get back to the story now? Fine. LOWER THE SOUND BARRIER! No need to shout i'm right next to you. Lowering sound barrier.
(Tech’s POV)
I wake in Luna’s room, upside down…. on the ceiling, and is this a shirt made of duct tape? Brain reboot from last night… (Brian can not help you right now… brain is still waking up… Error last night drunkenness is missing, cause; too drunk.) … I hate you brain.
I try to sit… down? or is it up? I don’t care it’s way to early. To even be up. I look down at Luna who is on top of her midnight blue star covered bed and was snoring softly, aww she looks so cute. I get off the ceiling and hop down to the floor as quiet as I can. I go over to Luna and pull her covers over her and she lifts her hoof up and starts nibbling on it. The amount of dawws… I get up from the bed and head towards the bedroom door, as I step out I hear very soft and quiet ‘I love you… Tech...’ I look over at Luna.
“I love you too, Luna,” I say quietly before I close the door. I stand in the hall for a few minutes just soaking in the atmosphere. I start walking through the maze of hall ways and rooms, and i get to a dead end… I turn around and start to head in another direction, and another dead end. I equip my gloves and punch through the wall and there is another wall… this is going to take a while.
(35 minutes later…)
After about 30 ish minutes of breaking and repairing walls I end up outside… in front of the training yards… behind the training guards. Everything stops for a few seconds, before half of the 258 guard legion shouts “AFTER THE INTRUDER!!!!” and after that I start to yell “shit! shit! shit! SHIT!!” while I run away. Fact; My body is 200x more durable due to being stone for 1,000 years and Chaos Magic, so it didn't really hurt when a lot of them tackled me… I was just laughing like a mad man.
“Why, is he laughing?”
“I don’t know just don’t let him out of your sight”
“Yes, Sir!”
“I shall go get Princess Luna, and inform her of this.” My eyes open wide at this.
“Ummm, how about no, shouldn't you, being day guards, get Celestia instead?”
“He is right, and Princess Luna is probably sleeping.”
“Fine, I shall go get Princess Celestia.” He starts to trot towards the castle, leaving the other guards watching me.
“So do you guys like jokes?” I ask, and a few of them nod. “Cool, so a Diamond Dog, a Bat Pony, and Unicorn walk into a bar…”
(5 minutes later…)
Celestia walks out with the guard trainer, with a sour look on her face. “Where is this strange creature that you ment-”
“HI CELLY!!” I shout with a big smile, she looks at me and sighs as she puts her hoof on her face.
“Really, Tech? Really? You can’t stay out of trouble for a week?”
“Hey I got lost in the castle, so I made a lot of holes and fixed them then these ponies started chasing me, it’s not my fault.” Celestia raises her eyebrow at that. “Well… it’s like 50/50.”
“Um Princess, if you don’t mind me asking, who and what is this thing?”
“This is Technology, former enemy and Luna’s Boyfriend” The guard looks back at me in fear. (Inside the Guards head, Princess Luna’s Boyfriend? oh shit! Oh Shit!! OH SHIT!!!)
“Sup,” I say as I wave to him. And…. he fainted… great… “so Celestia… breakfast?”
“Tech, what am I going to do with you?”
“Nothing, your sister did enough to me last night.” Her cheeks have a heavy blush in a instant, and starts to gag. So I do the appropriate thing, I laugh my ass off. I get up and pick up Celestia in my magic, “COME CELESTIA TO WAFFLES!!!” I yell as I run inside, with Celestia screaming all the way.
“TECH!!! PUT ME DOWN!!!”
“WAFFLES!!! CELESTIA!! WAFFLES!” “WAIT!!”
“WHAT!?”
“WHICH WAY IS THE KITCHEN!?”
“TURN LEFT THEN RIGHT THEN RIGHT AGAIN!!”
“THANKS!!!” I yell as I drop Celestia and follow her directions to the kitchen. I hear her yell some pony profanities at me while I run away.
(3rd Person POV)
As we back out of that particular scene we go to Luna who is still either unconscious or just a very deep sleep, shall we take a look around the castle? No… LET’S EAT WAFFLES! Waffles? Who said you could come back in? Who said I had to leave? O.O, i’m watching you (<.<) Ok then.. you do that. Well I guess that this is the end of the chapter guys, BYE! But wait what’s that?!?! WE CAN’T LET THEM SEE THAT YET. Why not? Because. Because why? SHUT UP!!! Why Shut Up? FOOL!
I really like the comical aspect of this story, keep up the good work, I think you should change to mature content!! Shut up! Nobody invited you! I don't care... I WANT WAFFLES ...What?
This has the random tag yes? *checks title page* Yes. Good, I was almost concerned for a second there.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Don't tease us you son of a... kind hearted being.
Pokemon reference? If so can i haz meh internets pls?
4095659 Nope sorry no pokemanz here
Love the comedy. I reckon you should just change it to mature and save yourself from the moderators telling you to.
Yeah, just change it to mature, if people don't change their setting to let them view mature rated stories then they really didn't like your story anyways.
Is there going too be any action/fight/Death scene. I can guess that discord is coming back and he either kills/captures Luna. Which cause tech too go on a blind rage of furry. Which he dies/badly beaten; then he is revived. Saves Luna. Then second story comes out
Just a guess.
I really don't mind humor, But only so much can a man take. In my own personal opion; I originally thought that this story was going into another direction
4097601 Likewise, you think that it would have a LOT more action and less comedy.
On another topic. There can be only so much trying when doing comedy, you might want to tone down the need for laughs. Especially with Luna, and for Faust sake! AT LEAST PUT THE MATURE SETTING ON!
Edit: Also, da FUCK is with Cadence? I don't she should have been talking that way, cmon. Make this a bit more closer to their characters.
Edit, Edit: I forgot to mention that over by the 'Waffles' part, you might have needed to separate Tech and Celestia's direction part.
Loves your jokes
“TURN LEFT THEN RIGHT THEN RIGHT AGAIN!!”
WHY
if you think that through you could just go straight and get to the same place
4099161
Depends on the layout. Imagine uneven rooms. Not squares.
Idk if I should be pleased or disappointed
loving this story so far XD i really do love it although im having a few problems with Luna and Tech being together so soon but the comedy gold of this fic over rules it like the bawss it is XD (which means to say since the comedy of this fic is so awesome that Luna and Tech being together so soon doesn't matter)
Celestia does not posses the magic if waffles
You know, waffles can tell the future. Especially so and much more accurately when covered in maple syrup.
And waffles never lie.
(If you get that reference you win a prize!)
4100843 A little of both never hurt.
I have almost no idea of what's going on, and I like it.
Hey guys we have come two full circles :P
Good News guys I have the next 4 chapters thought out. so they will be put out faster.
Now I'll go do this.
AND NOW THEY'RE GETTING FREAKY.
I really like Tech. He is so freaky !!!
"Onward! To waffels! WAFFLEEES, HOO!!!"