Turing walked through the center of town, her hooves crunching through the snow. She glanced around her, taking in the sight of Ponyville’s residents going about their business.
Analyzing surroundings: though there are more female than male members of Ponyville’s population, the number of potential romantic partners is significant. Now seeking stallions unaccompanied by mares.
She slowly scanned the area, drawing odd stares from some passersby, until she at last spotted a blue unicorn stallion with a wavy white mane sitting alone on a bench, drinking a cup of a steaming hot beverage. She began to make her way toward him.
Target locked.
Pokey Pierce was taking a sip of his cocoa when he heard a strange whirring behind him. He turned in time to see two large, glowing violet eyes staring at him. He gave a start and nearly dropped his cup as the mechanical mare placed her hooves on the back of the bench.
“Hello there, aesthetically pleasing stallion,” Turing said in what she probably thought constituted a breathy voice. “What is your name?”
“Uhhh… hi?” Pokey Pierce asked. He blinked at her before finally saying, “Oh! Uh, my name’s Pokey Pierce.”
“And I am Turing Test. I see you are enjoying a hot drink.”
Pokey nodded, relaxing slightly as he leaned back on the bench. “Yeah,” he replied giving her a small smile, “it’s… it’s kind of cold today.”
“That is correct. Well, if you are feeling cold, then perhaps you need somepony to warm you up.” She swiftly moved next to him, nuzzling her metallic cheek against his.
“Uwah!” he shouted, jerking back. “Y-you’re freezing!”
Turing’s ears twitched. “My apologies. I will increase power to my systems in order to heat myself and then attempt seduction again.”
The soft electrical hum she normally emitted began to grow in intensity, her body began to vibrate and rumble, and her eyes began to shine more brightly.
Pokey Pierce yelped and dashed off in a panic, dropping his cocoa.
Attempt failed. Re-evaluating strategy. Reduce physical closeness and attempt a target with more familiarity. Analyzing… new target designated.
***
Applejack, Apple Bloom, and Big Mac made their way up the path to their home, fresh bags of food and supplies slung over their backs.
“Brr!” Apple Bloom said, shivering. “I can’t wait fer Winter Wrap up! I’m freezin’ my tail off!”
“I hear ya, sugarcube,” Applejack said. “‘Course, we’ll have to get back to plantin’ an’ harvest the winter rye once it’s spring.”
“Eeyup!” Big Mac agreed. He went inside the house first, carrying his bags of oats and potatoes to the kitchen. He walked through the doorway and froze in midstep, his eyes going wide.
Turing Test was lying on her belly on the kitchen table. She held her face in her hooves and glanced up at him when he entered.
“Hii~ii!” she said, drawing out the word.
Big Mac only stared back at her.
“Welcome home, Big McIntosh,” she continued. “I was experiencing a 23% increase in loneliness when I recalled Granny Smith asking my opinion of you. Are you pleased by my presence?”
She began to trace playful circles on the table with one hoof as she brushed the coils of her polymer mane out of her face with the other. As she did, Applejack and Apple Bloom came up behind Big Mac, who was still staring wordlessly at Turing Test.
“Big Mac?” Applejack asked, squeezing by him. “What the hay are ya doin’ just standin’ in the doorway like--” She likewise froze when she saw Turing on the table.
Turing Test waved to Applejack. “Hello, Applejack.”
Neither she nor Big Mac replied. Apple Bloom finally broke the silence. “Turing Test? What’re you doin’ on the table?”
“I am attempting to entice your brother to enter a romantic relationship with me by behaving in a playfully seductive manner. It is not having the desired effect, so I will switch to a different pose.”
She switched from lying on her belly to reclining on her side, resting her head on one hoof as she raised her knee. “Rarity’s book refers this to as the ‘Draw Me Like One of your Prench Girls’ pose. My apologies, but I must now continue enticing your brother.”
Big Mac’s jaw dropped open. Applejack covered her mouth with her hoof, beginning to snicker.
“Big McIntosh, can you not see that I require you? I need an above-average sized stallion who is also sufficiently strong and kind hearted to accept my affections.” She paused, waiting for his response. When none came, she added, “That compliment was intended to increase your confidence and inform you of my receptivity to a romantic relationship. Also, I have taken the liberty of spreading hay across the floor of your barn. For some reason, Rarity’s book indicates that we would enjoy rolling in it.”
Applejack’s snickering now sounded like choking. Apple Bloom tilted her head and raised an eyebrow. As for Big Mac…
“Nope.” He backed up. “Nope. Nope nope nope!” He continued repeating that as he ran back through the living room and out the front door of the house. “Nnnnooope! Nopenopenopenope…”
Turing Test stared after him as he ran up the road, kicking up a cloud of snow behind him as he dashed off over the horizon. Her ears flattened, and she stepped off the kitchen table.
“Attempt failed,” she said.
“Well, I ain’t too sure what’s goin’ on here, Turing,” Apple Bloom said, “but if ya still want to roll around in some hay, I’d be glad to join ya instead!”
“No, no, that’s… that ain’t necessary,” Applejack said quickly, placing a hoof on Apple Bloom’s shoulder. “Look, uh, would ya mind carryin’ some o’ the groceries to the cellar? I think I need to have some ‘grown up’ talk with Turing Test.”
“Aw, why can’t I stay?” she whined. “She ain’t even a year old yet! I’m older’n that, at least!”
“That ain’t the point!”
“Well what is the point?”
“I’ll tell ya when yer older, now git!” Applejack snapped.
Apple Bloom grumbled as she walked off to the cellar, leaving Applejack and Turing Test alone.
“Look, Turing,” she sighed, putting her hooves on Turing’s shoulders, “it ain’t that Big Mac doesn’t like ya, but maybe he ain’t exactly ready fer a relationship yet.”
Turing nodded, rubbing her chin with a metallic scraping sound. “Applejack, many ponies seem uninterested in the prospect of having me as a romantic partner. Am I… unappealing?”
Applejack’s eyes darted left and right. “Uh… well, it ain’t that, exactly, but I think most stallions ain’t quite used to the idea o’ havin’ a robot fer a girlfriend.”
“I anticipated that to be the case, but Big McIntosh is one of the few stallions I have familiarity with.”
Applejack frowned. “Look, sugarcube, I’m sure once he’s recovered he’ll be glad to stay friends. I know fer a fact that he likes ya, but just maybe not that way.” She sighed and offered her a smile. “Ain’t there anypony you know who might be a bit more into, uh… machinery?”
Turing’s ears lifted. “I know of such a pony. I will locate him immediately!”
She turned to go, but Applejack ran ahead of her. “Hold on there, ya thirsty little love machine,” she said, holding up a hoof. “I know yer eager an’ all, but back there with Big Mac, ya came on a little strong. Ya might wanna just cut out all them fancy lines that Rarity’s book gave ya an’ just be upfront about how ya feel. Besides, talkin’ like that ain’t gonna net ya a nice fella that’ll treat ya right; yer more likely to get one that’ll think o’ ya as a piece o’ meat. Metal. Whatever.”
Turing nodded slowly. “I see. Thank you, Applejack. I had not realized my techniques were counterproductive. Perhaps my next attempt will go more smoothly.”
***
Hearing his doorbell ring, the Doctor trotted over and answered it.
Turing Test stood in the doorway.
“Hello, Doctor,” she said.
“Ah, hello there Turing Test!” the Doctor said, smiling at her. He adjusted his tie, straightening it. “How are you? Ear still working correctly, I trust?”
Turing nodded. “Yes. Thank you.” She twitched her ears as if to prove it to him.
“Well, would you like to come in?” he asked. “Derpy and I were just testing a new invention of mine. It’s a belt that circumvents the normal passage of time for the wearer so that they can move or do other things much faster! I’m thinking of calling it the ‘Hasty Waisty.’”
A gray blur sped by behind him yelling “Weeeeeeee!” It then crashed into a wall, the force knocking several clocks and pictures off a nearby shelf.
“...Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to have improved poor Derpy’s reflexes by much,” he sighed. He walked inside as Turing Test followed. “Derpy, are you all right?”
Derpy sat up, shaking her head. A brown belt with a dial in place of a buckle was around her waist. “Yes,I’mfine,Doc!ThisthingjusttakesalittlewhiletogetusedtobutIthinkI’mgettingthehangofit!” she said, her voice rapid and high-pitched.
“Ah, just a moment,” the Doctor said, turning the dial on the belt. “There. Better?”
“Much better!” she said, standing up and giving him a smile. “Hi, Turing!” she added, waving to her.
“Hello, Derpy. It seems that the Doctor’s new invention is effective.”
“It sure is!” she exclaimed, taking to the air. “When I get used to it, I’ll be the fastest mailmare in Ponyville!”
The Doctor furrowed his brow. “I’m not sure it will save much time if you can’t manage to avoid crashing into things, my friend.” He sighed. “At this rate, you’re likely to knock the mailboxes right off their posts, assuming you don’t go flying right through some poor pony’s wall.”
Derpy pouted. “You don’t have to be mean about it,” she said, giving back the belt.
“Just concerned is all,” he said raising his head indignantly. Then his eyes went wide. “Oh, but yes, of course, where are my manners?” He looked to Turing Test. “Now, um, can I help you, Miss Turing?”
Turing Test nodded. “I have been advised to be more direct with my intentions. I apologize if my explanation is insufficiently subtle, however, as many organics prefer subtlety.”
“Ah ha,” the Doctor said, exchanging a confused look with Derpy.
“You see, Doctor, I am interested in the topic of romantic relationships and am now considering potential romantic partners.”
Derpy stiffened. The Doctor, however, only smiled and said, “A romantic partner, you say? Oh that’s fantastic! Anyone you fancy, then?”
Turing cocked her head. “When you say ‘fancy,’ are you implying attraction or interest? If so, then my answer is affirmative. You see, I have been advised that many stallions would find me unacceptable as a partner due to my status as a machine. Therefore, I should seek a pony with an affinity for machines.”
The Doctor was nodding slowly, when a grin broke out across his face. “Ah ha! Now I understand! Well, my friend, you have certainly come to the right place!”
Derpy’s skewed eyes widened, and she stared at the Doctor, covering her mouth with her hooves. “D-Doc?”
“I know every engineer, mechanic, and repair pony from here to Canterlot!” the Doctor declared, placing a hoof on his chest. “Just a mo’, I’ll see if I can’t find a list of them! Bound to be one of them that would enjoy your company!” He turned around and galloped into the nearby hallway.
“Doctor,” she said, reaching after him, “you misundersta--”
Derpy suddenly rushed forward and clutched her hoof. Turing paused and looked into her eyes, which were trying to focus on her.
“I know what you’re asking,” she whispered, “even if Doc doesn’t.” She swallowed. “But… please don’t. I mean, I… I don’t want you to be unhappy, but…”
She glanced over her shoulder, her cheeks flushing.
Turing’s eyes shifted and she looked from Derpy to the hallway, hearing the sound of the Doctor busily rummaging through supplies in his back room. She turned back to Derpy, who locked eyes with her and looked at her pleadingly.
“I see. You also are pursuing a relationship?”
“Um… I… I’d like to,” she muttered, looking down, chuckling nervously.
Turing tapped her chin. “Can we not share him?”
Derpy gawked at her, turning bright red, but she quickly regained her composure and shook her head. “N-no! I mean, I know that might sound selfish, but… it’s just that…”
She gulped and held her hooves to her chest, smiling.
“Some things are too precious to share.”
Turing bowed her head. “Understood. Out of consideration for our friendship, I will not pursue this relationship.” She heard the Doctor give a shout as something heavy fell on top of him, the assorted contents clattering across the floor. “I will leave now. Please help the Doctor and give him my thanks.”
Derpy let out a sigh of relief and gave Turing Test a quick hug. “Thank you,” she whispered, and flew back to the hallway to help the Doctor find his way out of whatever mess he’d gotten himself into.
Turing quietly let herself out, shutting the door gently behind her.
***
Bon Bon rubbed her chin as she stared at the snow shovel the vendor had laid on the counter of the outdoor market.
“I don’t know,” she said slowly, narrowing her eyes. “Is that handle going to be all right to use for an earth pony or a unicorn? It might be tough on my teeth.”
The vendor rolled his eyes. “It’ll be fine. Seriously, are you really going to haggle over this? It’s fifteen bits.”
“But--”
“Period!”
Bon Bon sighed. It was a fair price, she supposed, but she always liked to be thrifty. “All right, fifteen. Lyra, could you give me the purse so we can--” She turned and stopped in mid-sentence when she saw Lyra was no longer there. She made a face.
“Excuse me,” she said to the vendor as she began to search for Lyra.
She glanced around the market but didn’t see her anywhere.
“Lyra!” she called, raising a hoof to her mouth. “Lyra, where are you?”
“Here! I’m here!” Lyra exclaimed, emerging from a nearby aisle and galloping over to her.
Bon Bon smiled, but her smile quickly faded when she saw what Lyra had around her neck: a bright pink scarf.
“Uh, Lyra? Where’d you get that scarf?”
“Oh, I saw it at a vendor we passed on the way to get that snow shovel,” she replied, holding out the end of the scarf and rubbing it against her cheek. “It’s really warm, too! So, did you find a new shovel?”
“Yes, I did,” Bon Bon said, her frown deepening, “but you have our money, remember?”
Lyra grinned sheepishly. “Oh, right.” She levitated the purse out from beneath the scarf and put it in Bon Bon’s hoof.
Bon Bon undid the small coin purse and peered inside. A growl built up in her. “Lyyyraaa!” she groaned. “There are only seven bits in here! You spent our money on that scarf; now we can’t buy the shovel!”
Lyra’s ears flattened. She pouted. “You want me to return the scarf?”
Bon Bon opened her mouth to say something, but then paused, seeing Lyra’s expression.
“Well, I mean,” she stammered, “it’s just that… I mean, you bought a scarf two weeks ago!”
“But it was blue, and you said it didn’t look good on me, so I saw this pink one and the color of it reminded me of that time at the fair last summer--”
“Oh, when we got that cotton candy that tasted a little like bubble gum, and it got all over my face--”
“--and when I said it looked like a beard, you started laughing like you were Santa Hooves--”
“--and that filly came up and asked if I was Mrs. Santa Hooves!”
The two of them burst out laughing. When they finally got control over themselves, Bon Bon heaved a sigh, but she did so with a resigned smile.
“Okay, Lyra,” she said, holding up a hoof, “you can keep the scarf. We’ll just have to borrow Cherry Berry’s or June Bug’s for a while.”
“All right!” Lyra cheered, gleefully kicking her forelegs in the air. She went over and hugged Bon Bon. “Thanks, Bon Bon!”
“Yeah, yeah,” Bon Bon replied, rolling her eyes. “Well, let’s get home. It’s cold out here, and--” She paused, seeing something out of the corner of her eye. She released Lyra, and they both turned to see Turing Test standing nearby, watching them.
“Oh, Turing Test!” Lyra said, smiling warmly. “Sorry, we didn’t see you there!”
“It is all right. I saw you as I was walking around the market. In truth, I have been walking around Ponyville in an attempt to ‘clear my head.’ I have heard that taking a walk is conducive to thinking about one’s problems.”
Lyra and Bon Bon glanced at each other, then back to Turing Test.
“What sort of trouble are you having?” Bon Bon asked. “Is there anything we can do to help?”
“I am uncertain if you can help,” Turing Test replied, “but I am having difficulty with establishing a romantic relationship.”
“Oooh!” Lyra said, leaning in closer. “I think this calls for a conference at Sugarcube Corner!”
***
Sitting at a table in Sugarcube Corner that afternoon with Bon Bon and Turing Test, Lyra slurped her caramel mochaccino through her straw, then drew it out to lick the excess whipped cream from it. “Oh wow, I love that they sell hot coffee drinks here during the winter!” she exclaimed.
Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “I’m all for helping Turing Test,” she said, gesturing to the robot, “but did we have to come here to do it? Don’t you think we could both stand to eat fewer sweets?”
Lyra chuckled and pointed at Bon Bon’s cupcake. “So you’re saying you don’t want that cupcake?” She took hold of it with her magic and began to pull it toward herself before Bon Bon seized it, yanking it back.
“I didn’t say that!” she snapped.
“My apologies,” Turing Test said, raising a hoof, “but I am still curious how you may be able to help me with my problem.”
“Oh, right, sorry,” Bon Bon said, blushing slightly as Lyra did the same. “Well, why don’t you just tell us what you’ve been doing, and maybe we can help.”
Turing Test told them about her conversation with Cadance, her getting help from Twilight and Rarity, and her attempts with Pokey Pierce, Big Mac, and the Doctor.
“Well,” Bon Bon muttered once Turing had finished, “that explains why Big Mac was running through Ponyville yelling ‘Nope nope nope!’ until he smacked into that wall.”
“Well, don’t be too discouraged, Turing,” Lyra said, patting Turing’s hoof gently. “After all, that’s just three different guys!”
“Perhaps so, but due to strangers finding my approach to be off-putting, I have determined that a more familiar target has a higher probability of success.”
“Pfft, ‘target!’” Lyra giggled.
Bon Bon ignored that but steepled her hooves as she faced Turing. “Look, Turing, I know you’re eager, but Lyra’s right! Like they say, there are plenty of fish in the sea!”
“I do not… oh. You are speaking in metaphor. You are saying that I have other options available to me.”
“Right!” Bon Bon said, giving a satisfied nod. “I mean, if you want, you could always have your friends introduce you to somepony! Like, say… uh, what about Bulk Biceps?”
Turing Test shook her head. “I appreciate him as a friend, but I do not feel we are sufficiently compatible. His method of articulation is far more energetic than mine.”
Lyra reached for a napkin and took a small pencil from the coin purse she’d been carrying. “Okay, somepony with lower energy,” she said, taking a note.
“Good idea, Lyra!” Bon Bon said, smiling enthusiastically. “Keeping a list of good qualities might help us out!”
“That may be an effective strategy,” Turing said. “I also appreciate ponies who are not disturbed by my appearance.”
“Kind of a given, but sure,” Lyra murmured.
Bon Bon closed her eyes. “Let’s see… maybe somepony who shares interests?”
“I enjoy interaction, learning new things, and humor.”
“Hmm… talking, learning, jokes…”
“Due to my difficulty understanding unspoken nuances of organic interaction, I appreciate those who are honest and who speak plainly. Also, I am grateful to ponies who are patient with me when I do not initially comprehend their meaning.”
“...honest, plain-spoken, patient.” Lyra nodded, giving a satisfied smile. “Hm, not bad!”
“Well, does that help, Turing?” Bon Bon asked.
Turing tapped her chin. “I am uncertain. Even if a match is found, what other criteria will inform me of mutual affection?”
“Well, body language, blushing, your heart beating faster,” Lyra replied.
“Plus they just might tell you straight out if they think you’re cute,” Bon Bon said, giving Lyra a sly smile.
“Or give you a nice present,” Lyra added, returning Bon Bon’s smile, gazing into her eyes.
The two were quiet for a moment as they locked eyes, slowly edging closer to one another.
“Do you have further criteria?” Turing Test asked.
Both mares sat up straight, turning to stare at Turing. They blushed, apparently having forgotten that she was still there.
“Er, well, I think that should cover it,” Bon Bon said, giving a nervous smile as she cleared her throat.
“Yeah, I think we’ve got a good list!” However, her smile began to fade. “Unfortunately, I’m not sure if I know too many guys like this. Well, Caramel’s pretty sweet, but he’s dating Sassaflash. Oh, how about that guy with the shamrock cutie mark you know, Bon Bon?”
“Lucky? Pfft!” Bon Bon scoffed. “That guy’s either really dense or just not interested. Berry Punch told me she went to an all-night party trying to get with him, and he didn’t even seem to get the hint.”
“Wow! She was up all night to get Lucky?”
“Apparently so,” Bon Bon sighed. “In any case, I don’t think he’s an option.”
Turing sat up straight. “One moment… searching for known matches… no results found matching criteria.” Her ears lowered. “I do not know of any stallions that fit a sufficient number of criteria. Shall I broaden my search results?”
Bon Bon tapped her chin. “I’d hate to make you compromise too much,” she said. Then, chuckling, she added, “Heh… it’s too bad you’re only interested in stallions.”
Turing cocked her head at that. “The only non-equine males I know are Spike the Dragon and Mr. Cornelius Vanderbull. One is of insufficient age while the other is married.”
Lyra blinked. “Um, Turing, I think she means, um… mares.”
Turing’s ears twitched. “I had not considered that.”
“Well, I mean, if you only like stallions,” Lyra said hurriedly, “then that’s all that matters.”
“My criteria was based on the typical family unit and the majority of relationships depicted in works of fiction. Rarity assumed that I was targeting stallions, thus I adopted her methodologies.”
Bon Bon leaned closer. “Wait, then… well, who are you attracted to?”
“I do not feel physical attraction, Bon Bon,” Turing replied. “I am merely seeking a compatible partner who may appreciate me. I have no biological imperative to seek a partner for breeding.”
Lyra nodded, taking another sip of her mochaccino. “Well, that makes sense, I guess. I mean, you’re a robot, so you’re not really a mare--”
“Incorrect,” Turing said with sudden forcefulness, drawing herself up. “I am designated as Unit 003M, the M designating me as a mare. Furthermore, a crucial part of my development has involved ponies referring to me using feminine pronouns, rather than simply as ‘it.’ I am female.”
“Oh, jeez, Turing, I’m sorry!” Lyra cried, holding up a hoof. “I… I didn’t mean it like that.”
Turing bowed her head. “My apologies, Lyra. I did not wish to chastise you. I simply wish to be treated primarily as a pony. My status as a machine is part of my identity, but it is secondary to that.”
Bon Bon smiled. “Well, if it’s not an issue for you, Turing, then maybe you should think beyond just stallions. After all, love is about what you feel. If you know of somepony that you think might be your special somepony, then you should go get him or her!”
Turing nodded slowly. “Understood. I will accept your advice and reapply my search parameters to both genders.”
She sat back up, her eyes constricting slightly as she broadened her search.
Now matching to search criteria…
-Below average energy
-Undisturbed/appreciative of my appearance
-Enjoys interaction
-Studious
-Enjoys humor
-Honest
-Low use of nuanced speech
-Above average patience
-Body language including increased heart rate or blushing in my presence
-Offered a gift to me
Turing’s eyes returned to normal, but her ears stood straight on end. “Search complete,” she said to Lyra and Bon Bon. “One match found with 100% accuracy.”
Bon Bon and Lyra leaned forward excitedly.
“That’s great!” Bon Bon exclaimed.
“Ooh, ooh, who is it, Turing?” Lyra asked.
Then they heard a high-pitched giggle, and both turned and shouted when they saw Pinkie Pie standing right next to their table.
“Oh, I think I know who she means!” Pinkie said, grinning broadly.
“Pinkie?!” Bon Bon shouted. “When did you get here?!”
Turing tilted her head at that. “She has been here for the last three minutes and twenty-two seconds. You did not notice her.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Bon Bon cried. “Either of you?!”
“She did not say ‘hello.’”
“And I just didn’t want to interrupt!” Pinkie added.
Turing leaned closer to Pinkie Pie. “Pinkie Pie, I have an inquiry regarding your impressions of--”
Pinkie cut her off, holding up a hoof. “I know what you’re going to ask, and I think you should just go ask her yourself.” Her grin turned sly, and she placed a paper on the table, sliding it over to Turing Test as she wiggled her eyebrows. “Here’s her address. Go and get her, you castiron Casanova.”
***
Turing Test slowed her jets and descended to the ground below. This area, the Northwestern Badlands, was surrounded by long, flat plains littered with boulders, scarred by deep gorges, and bordered by mountains. Small, scrubby plants grew sporadically, as did occasional trees. The atmosphere there was arid and dusty, but the temperature in late winter was still fairly cold.
Small hiking trails crisscrossed the land and, here and there, one could see small ranger outposts or observation towers. Turing, however, was concerned with a lone cabin at the center of the valley.
She set down, the roar of her jets fading to a low whine before finally cutting off completely. She folded her wings back into herself and returned to neutral mode as she walked toward the cabin, her hooves gently crunching on the gravel-covered earth.
The cabin was small, wooden, with a few unadorned windows. Many rocks were piled outside, organized by type. Next to the small path up to the front door, Turing saw a sign that read:
University of Manehattan - Department of Geology
Research Station #1
Turing saw the name of the researcher on a small placard that had been inserted into a slot below, and she knew that she’d come to the right place.
She went to the door, raising a hoof. For some reason, she hesitated. In part, she wished that she had come with support from Pinkie, but Pinkie had said that she had to stay behind to meet her sister Marble Pie, who was apparently going on a trip around Equestria after making a stop in Ponyville.
Turing decided that she’d come all this way; it was illogical to turn back now. She knocked lightly on the door and stepped back.
The door opened, and a familiar gray earth pony mare with a purple mane and dull greenish-blue frock stepped out. Her eyes widened momentarily when she saw Turing Test standing before her. After a moment of silence between the two, in her usual deadpan voice, she said “Hello, Turing Test.” She blinked. “It’s nice to see you.”
Turing Test’s ears twitched. “Hello, Maud Pie.”
To be continued...
Everfree NW huh? I should be going thereagain myself this year. Hope to see you there!
7155616 Oh, I'm not going. I just entered their writing contest. Marble's Horizon was a finalist, but sadly did not win. Still, to get so far in a big field of entries was an honor anyway.
awww... Gadget Test is officially non-cannon now
or at least highly likely not to be
Maud Pie × Turing Test? That… that actually sounds like it might work, though I do have one objection: I don’t think there’s an elegant way to mash the names together like we do with other shipped couples.
farm8.staticflickr.com/7303/12661270083_847b99b37f_o.jpg
Ouch! Yup, Turing's first attempts at courting were funnily cringy as I thought that they would be (Poor Big Mac! )
At last, Big Mac's family and Derpy were understanding of Turing's cluelessness in the subject...
Turing's conversation with Lyra and Bon Bon was very good and helped to turn Turing into the right path: MaudTest (or M-Test)
Looking forward to see Turing and Maud's "date"...
Well you certainly drew her like one of those Prench ponies, yes sir you did!
And MAUD PIE?! My feelings are conflicted but I'll sum that up in one picture and one line (btw, the line describes my feelings right now):
i.imgur.com/07b1lNK.png
I thought it would be Flash Sentry, oh well. It's the writer's decision than I have no right to complain.
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/161/559/1313211040001.png
Not the worst choice Turing could have made, and with approval from Maud's sister Pinkie no less.
Maud would be unlikely to take offense at an inappropriate comment, and Turing would probably survive if she did...
And one wonderful and funny chapter! The scene with Bigmac was grand.
not my favourite shipping, but as long as he isn't going to be the time lord, then I can still enjoy it. To be honest I think I don't like most of the "main Shippings", because they are mostly about Ponys that have seen each other first and stuff like that.
They do know each other? I must have forgotten that. Part of me hopes that it works out. this is the first time I'm voting for a character to be asexual.k
Oh....and I finally added my upvote to the story.
So, does Dr. Turing not count or was their meeting just secret enough to eliminate him from her public list?
Um... cool I can get behind this.
*spittake* I got that one!
Truly, this may be a great opportunity for Turing to learn the less physical aspects of love.
Keep going! ;)
Okay, I can see that. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
7155683 Maud/test= Maudest. It's not that hard.
7155683
7156529
Oh, I've already got a good ship name for them. In fact, it'll be the next chapter's title.
Edit: Scratch that. I had a better title (and song reference) in mind.
i.sli.mg/SyFFA4.jpg
I guess the chances of Turing hooking up with a male were low since she doesn't have much of a attractive appearance. But now this fic is like the majority of the shipping fics on this site with the exception that one mare is a robot while the other has the personality like one.
I think big Mac is married to his farm. Some people are joined to their jobs or homes. He seems to be fully obligated to both.
Anyone got a bottle of cider? I wanna see this ship set sail!
-Ru
... Maybe a can of oil instead?
7156172 I did actually consider Dr. Turing, and now I'm not totally sure why I left him off. I'll see about adding him back in. Thanks for the note!
7155678
My ship-name for it is "Cyborg."
Well, there's no guarantee that the thing with Maud will work out. The other thing is that Gadget's one of Turing Test's best friends, so there's the friendzone issue. Still, this next chapter won't be one that totally changes the status quo, so if you want to keep shipping Turing Test and Gadget, I won't object.
I kind of expected some mixed reaction to finally doing a chapter on romance and relationships, and it looks like I was right.
Well, that's cool with me. Let me see if I can smooth over those feelings, because all my readers are important to me...
7155685
Sorry.
Yeah, I know that you don't favor the F/F ships, and I respect that, but I decided to go ahead with this chapter and tried my best to have the chapter explain why Maud would be compatible. If it bothers you, consider that since Turing Test is a robot, she's biologically asexual, even if she identifies as female. In that light, would it really be that different if she had chosen a male partner? Just some food for thought.
Regardless, as I said in our recent conversation, if this isn't your cup of tea, you can skip the next chapter without losing too much of the plot, and hopefully I'll see you next arc.
7155755
I'll take mixed feelings! I hope you end up enjoying what I've got planned. And knowing Turing Test, it might well turn out to be a disastah.
7157685
Ouch.
...
Nah, just kidding.
Anyway, I'm actually trying to write it in a way that's less conventional than your average fluff-filled shipfic. While it might lean towards the sentimental, like the rest of the story, the focus is on Turing Test discovering more about herself and what she is capable of. And since its been shown pretty well that she can maintain friendships, I thought it might be interesting to see how she would handle a different kind of relationship.
...Expect awkwardness. So much awkwardness.
Anyway, thanks for commenting, gents. I hope you end up like the chapter, but please feel free to tell me if you don't. Compliments and criticism are both welcome here.
7160477 Well, like I said, food for thought.
vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/mlp/images/4/48/FANMADE_Rainbow_Dash_shrug.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20130303185715
Now, if I tell you exactly what I'm planning, that'd be a bit of a spoiler, now wouldn't it?
What I will say is that this arc, like the others, is pretty self-contained. While I won't speak about the overall outcome, this story isn't really turning into a big ol' romance story. Since all arcs build upon each other in different ways, I can't promise that it won't have any consequences or ramifications, but Maud isn't joining the main cast of the story.
So, yeah, just one chapter on the topic. You can skip it, you can read it and possibly hate it, or you might read it and enjoy it. Your call.
A mare makes more sense than a stallion due to the fact a mare would have an easier time ahem getting off if she ever wanted to go that far, so I approve. A stallion would just hurt trying to grind against her. Unless she were to install a fleshlight.
Anyways, these chapters are adorable. Her innocence is perfect, and I can't help but d'aawww every few paragraphs. I personally think Gadget and Test would have been cute, crossing my fingers still, but this is a logical choice and makes sense for Turing to start with. Good on you for keeping to what makes sense! Although, I still think it is possible that her romances might all fail due to her realizing she just doesn't feel it, and friendship is good enough for her.
7160747
This brings me massive relief!
7160139
Is Turing aware of the friendzone concept?
7160432
We know that what Turing really wants is to be valued by those she can exclusively call her own; that love and assurance from romantic and familial bonds.
That makes me wonder...
Turing has scanned a great many works of smut in her analysis of written romance and related activities.
Turing identifies as female, so could this hunt for romance also be driven by a hidden mild curiosity to potentially experience the standard prescribed romantic female orgasm, fueled by her experience with Discord's power?
Not requesting anything here. Just pointing out that Turing has shown a strong desire to follow any instructions on expected behavior and relationship patterns exactly as prescribed, including instructions on altering her own expectations and desires to match standard expectations and standard desires for her currently relevant role.
Should i continue examining Turing with this in mind, or am i happily very wrong?
7160996
"Gadget, I am curious if you could build something for me. I have realized that there is something I want much more than eyebrows."
Hooboy, I'm not sure even Gadget could stay professional during that conversation.
7163145 Thanks for the string of comments, Mastermenthe! Let's see...
In Part 1 of this arc, Turing has a conversation with Cadance about the topic:
Turing might be unwilling to consider upsetting the dynamic she has with her closer friends. Maud, by contrast, is a friend, but not one she knows as well as her other friends, Gadget included.
Technically, Twilight doesn't really keep much smut around, but rather she keeps more classy romance novels around. Still, Twilight is an adult and does have some things like that around, as well as a fair number of biology textbooks. So, yeah, Turing knows about sex, obviously.
Now to the question of if that's the reason she's pursuing a romance, the answer is no, that's not it. Turing wants to experience it because she wants to experience the emotional response. She is capable of affection and understands friendship better, so love seems to her to be an even greater experience. While it's certain that she desires to experience physical sensations in the same way organics do, she has no real concept of what they even feel like. Thus, to her, she has no real way to imagine how a scratch behind the ears, a belly rub, a massage, or, yes, an orgasm would feel, or how they would be different from each other.
In short, yes, she'd like to have one, and she knows organics greatly enjoy them, but she doesn't really want one any more than she'd like any other sensation. Plus, she knows her hardware limitations, so a relationship wouldn't give her one anyway. She's also aware of enough social convention to know that it might be inappropriate to ask Discord to give her an orgasm. Besides, the Dislestia and Fluttercord shippers would never let me hear the end of it.
Hope that clears things up!
7163387
Thanks for addressing it!
You didn't really have to respond in equal depth though; now i'm all embarrassed you took me seriously!
I am surprised you didn't address my ending paragraph, about Turing's avidity for executing cognitively dissonant efforts of mental self-alteration in response to any given instructions.
It's the real concern i have for turing, one that i thought i might get an implied answer by asking after more shallow character traits, such ass sexuality.
Uh huh, right, i'll buy that.
Twilight's book storage ain't the only place scanned by Turing's quest on How To Pony...
The words "Discord", "inappropriate", and "social convention" all in the same sentence...
7165000
Okay...
Yes. That is a thing that she does.
Huh huh. You said "ass sexuality."
Well, like I said, she doesn't have much smut.
I didn't say none.
You try keeping a straight face when you look a snaggle-toothed draconequus in the eye and ask him to make you come.
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This is gonna be awesome.
7166167
Ah, put like that, it sounds absolutely terrifying!
After thinking it over while reading the comments, I do believe that I would enjoy some "Maud's little Test".
I should not have laughed at that, but I did
My god! Is this the start of something special for our plated protagonist? Or will the relationship sink like a rock in a pond?
*Find out next time, in DRAGON BA-* wait wrong thing
MY SHIP IS COMING INTO PORT BABY!
...
Yeah, so, I've been gone a while...and this is hilarious...
And the shippings don't stop anywhere...and Turing casually asking for threesomes with Derpy...and dammit, if Big Mac wasn't as entertaining as always.
No in depth analysis here, Turing is possibly looking into relationships, because in her search of being organic she FEELS like she needs to be dating or romantically involved in order to be more so. Now, Maud...yup, their a strong match in a number of ways.
I don't need to go into detail, it's already said here...damn, I guess I'll have to wait till numerio number 3 before we can see where this leads.
Please...update soon...
This is an interesting turn of events: Maud and Turing Test. Now i was suprised you would go for this pairing, or rather potential pairing. Not that i have anything against it, but nothing is set in stone yet. It will work or won't. That's my policy when it comes to uncharted pairings like this. I'm hoping to see a happy resolution between them, regardless of their relationship. I was also wondering if you were going to write an arc between Turing Test and Celestia. You did with Luna during the Prime Time of your life arc and I want to see Turing and Celestia befriend each other too.
7163319
Hot. I could enjoy the sexual, possibly lesbian, shenanigans that could ensue
My rageing technophilia aside, turing and twilight are VERY lucky she never thought to look for partners closer to her age.
Now that must look very uncanny valley to ponies..
'prench' sounds odd. Could be 'Prance Girls'?
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7224083
This arc in a nutshell.
Also, wow, that's awesome!
All hail Pinkie Pie, the ultimate wingmare!
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Aww, I expected Twilight. This is your brain on bookhorses.
Congrats on your story being in two categories
OH MY GOD! YOU DID IT! YOU SHIPPED THEM!
8513598
Yep! This is what I was talking about 20-odd chapters ago. Enjoy!