21st, Eight Months After Death
Dear Rainbow,
It appears I have regained a small amount of my sanity. I looked back at some of the letters and my mental state is quite jarring, as well as more than a little depressing. At the moment I can fully understand that you died eight months ago today, and since that point I’ve been writing you letters. Since that point if been slowly falling apart.
I don’t know by what grace I’ve regained my sanity, but I have a feeling that it won’t last. Whatever is holding me together right now will soon let go. I took today to fix some things and prepare myself for the rest of my life.
I finally told them, I told the girls about my situation. About the fact that this was all my choice, that I refused to lose my memories of you, and that choice in turn meant that my life is forfeit. The looks on their faces hurt me, they hurt so much. I felt like I betrayed them, which I guess I really had. I had chosen memories of you over being able to live with them. I hope they can forgive me, I don’t think I’ll be able to forgive myself.
Even though they assured me that they understood my decision, I could see their look of confusion and sadness. I am horrible, I have no sympathy and no shame. And I’m going to die in four months, that’s all the time I have to make penance for what I’ve done, and I will be insane the entire time.
I’m beginning to have second thoughts about keeping my memories of her.
With Love,
Twi
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*keeps calm and carries on*
Well... until the end she was kinda sane, then that ending just blew that out of the water. She didn't write a lette for threee weeks, something is wrong with that...
Tragedy or happy ending? Ooooh, this is indeed a very suspenseful read, We look forward to the ending.
I'm actually quite glad that you are going to take time to figure this out. I was just wondering exactly how you were going to manage to wrap this all up without it being boring.
Kudos to you.
Also, you've still got it!
2320193 Define "Heartwarming"
It warms my heart to see people care so much about the characters I torture
2262815 There is no way this ends happily. All possible endings to this, other than "Twilight or Celestia magically fix the problem" ends in bad.
2320228 The definition of "heartwarming" i would use is the one that lots of people who read this kind of thing use. They react to these stories as if they've read something uplifting, calling it beautiful and (to my eyes anyway) completely missing the bits where they should kinda want to go find someone they love and hug them because holy shit life is fragile.
2320228
Well played.
2320290
There is definitely at least one possible happy ending, it'll be faintly so, but it will be happy.
Oh. My. God.
(This comment might contains some spoilers, read at your own risk)
I read your other fic, Clipped Wings first. That was saddening, and yet a bit uplifting. Still wagers more towards saddening though.
So, I thought I'd read something fun to even it up a little, yet somehow I ended up here, hm, anyhow;
Ouch.
This fic did hurt a bit.
And still, it amazes me.
It's very well performed, and portrays Twilight in her character as far as I can tell. She's emotionally devastated, but is still trying to force her scientific knowledge into what she thinks.
The dark turn is also mindwrenching to read, how she's starting to mix memories up, or even just the idea of the sickness she's got that is connected to her memories.
Just .. great idea and very well performed, and yet so very sad. Poor Twi, sigh.
I wonder where you'll take this.
Anyhow, liked and faved both this fic and Clipped Wings.
Also, watching you.
M