Clumsy Saves the Day!3,204 words
Finally Going Home871 words

Smurfy Adventures in New York (Part 1)

The next day, we turn our attention back to Gargamel at his newfound castle. He chuckled deviously as he held the locks of Smurfette’s hair in his hand. “This is it. This is it, Azrael ” Gargamel said, walking over to his new contraption. “Smurfette’s hair goes in here, flows through the Smurf essence extractor, and finally, I have my Smurfilator!”

Steamed gushed from the contraption as it got to work. “It’s the pièce de résistance. The crème de la…” Gargamel paused, seeing that Azrael was busy cleaning himself to listen. “Would you care for a mint when you’re done?”

Ar once, a blue aura began swirling from within the popcorn machine. “Yes, yes, yes!” the wizard said excitedly. “With this precious elixir, my sorcerous spell shall be powerful beyond all measurable…measurements.”

Azrael stood up and watched Gargamel as he held an open ring beneath a nozzle, and as he turned the handle, a droplet of blue liquid leaked out and dropped into the ring. “This one tiny drop will give me the power to capture them all!”

Azrael stared at it with interest as Gargamel turned to him with an evil smirk.

XXXXXXXX

Back with the Smurfs, ponies, and the Winslows, the group was busy preparing breakfast for everybody, all the while singing a happy tune. Gutsy was having the time of his life riding the juicer, while Clumsy and Izzy happily filled a glass up with the orange juice.

La la la la la la, sing a happy song
La la la la la la, smurf the whole day long

Grace only chuckled as Pipp, Sparky, Misty and Smurfette washed strawberries under the spicket of the sink.

Next time you’re feeling blue
Just let a smile begin
Happy things will come to you
So Smurf yourself a grin

All the while, Zipp, Hitch and Grouchy were struggling to activate the toaster nearby. “Ugh, I hate being small...” Hitch grumbled, pushing down hard on the level. “It’s so obvious that what you’re doing is wrong!” Brainy walked up to them. “Oh ho, really?” Grouchy smirked. “After you then.”

“How crazy is this?” Grace asked her husband. “There are little blue people, a baby dragon and colorful ponies singing in our kitchen.”

Finally, Zipp kicked the lever on the toaster, sending Brainy flying into Patrick's bowl of cereal. “So you’re sticking with your 'This is actually happening' theory?”

“Sorry,” Brainy said timidly as Grace and the ponies giggled. “Okay...” Patrick said, turning to his computer. “It says here Smurfs are mythical creatures from Belgium, also known as Schtroumpfs. Documented by Peyo.”

“Huh, interesting,” Misty said. “Also says that they bring good luck. Like leprechauns for the Irish,” Grace added. “It says they’re mythical, Grace.”

“Whoaaaaaa!!!” Izzy shrieked as she flew off of the juicer and onto Patrick's computer in a daze. “I’m so sorry, Master Winslow,” Papa said sincerely. “Well, they look pretty real to me,” Grace said. “And what about the ponies and dragon?”

“Couldn’t find anything about them, aside from a children’s cartoon,” Patrick said. “Well, that’s a bit lame,” Zipp pouted in disappointment. “Doesn’t that make us mythical, too?” Izzy asked. “If anything, it makes us fictional.” Pipp pointed out. Patrick wiped the juice off his computer as Grace looked to see Clumsy giving Elway the best belly rub the dog ever experienced. “Okay, to review,” Patrick said with his computer in hand. “You guys come from a magical forest where you live in oversized mushrooms.”

“Yes,” Papa confirmed. “You’re being chased by an evil wizard.”

“Yeah.”

“And you’re trapped in New York until there’s a blue moon.”

“Very good.”

“And you like to use the extremely imprecise term 'Smurf' for just about everything.”

“Smurfxactly.” Brainy said, only for Sunny to chuckle nervously. “Well, they do, but we don’t.”

Patrick turned to the Smurfs on the counter “And you’re all named after your personalities? Do you get your names when you’re born, or after you’ve exhibited certain traits?”

“Yeah,” Clumsy said. “Yep,” Smurfette said happily. “Yeah, whatever,” Grouchy grumbled. “Master Winslow, there must be something about the blue moon on your magic window machine,” Papa said. “Whoa! Just what is this magic searching device?” Brainy asked. “Right now, I’m using Google.”

“Oooh... Goooooogle...”

Patrick stared at the Smurfs, creeped out before he looked up the blue moon on the computer. “Blue moon. A full moon that occurs twice in one month. A figurative construct, much like yourselves…”

“Hey!” Hitch huffed, offended. “But, the moon itself doesn’t appear to be blue.” Patrick finished.

“What?” the ponies asked in surprise. “Not blue?” Smurfette said with disappointment. “Great...” Grouchy said sarcastically. “Now you'll never get home!” Misty said, crestfallen, but Papa was quick to reassure them. “No cause for alarm, my little ponies and Smurfs. If we’re to open the portal home, I’ll just have to smurf us a potion to invoke the blue moon.”

“He can do that?” Pipp asked in a whisper. “He's Papa Smurf!” Sunny excitedly said. “He can do anything! And I'm willing to do whatever I can to help.”

“You hear that, honey? They’re only staying till an actual blue moon rises.” Patrick said sarcastically. “Which could happen if the little blue Santa man and the tiny orange horse make a magic potion, which, at this point, seems completely plausible.”

Grouchy popped out of the cup of milk Patrick was carry with a half-eaten strawberry. “Wanna bite?”

“No, thank you.”

“Of course, the stars will need to be perfectly aligned. And when that might be is hard to determine without the proper instrument.” Papa said, studying the picture of the moon on the computer. “Master Winslow, might I borrow your stargazer?”

“My what-whatzer?”

“Uh, oh. He doesn’t have a stargazer? Do you?” Gutsy asked, and Clumsy began to feel a sense of overwhelming guilt. “This is all my fault...”

“We’re all gonna die... we’re all gonna die!” Brainy began to panic. “Smurf out of it, scaredy-brains! One Panicky Smurf is enough!” Gutsy said grabbing Brainy by his shoulders. “Besides, Papa had a vision, and everything turns out Smurfy.” Smurfette added. “Right, Papa?”

Everyone looked to the elder Smurf, and Papa looked over to Sunny, who gave him an unsure look. “Yes, yes. It all turns out just fine,” Papa said worriedly. But... he honestly wished he was as sure about such as his little Smurfs believed him to be.

XXXXXXXX

Gargamel wandered the streets with Azrael, looking for the man that kidnapped his beloved Smurfs. “We must find this Smurf thief!” he said as Azrael meowed a complaint. “Stop your complaining! If I were a Smurf, where would I go?”

That’s when he began to ask people passing him by on the street, first approaching a young man on the phone. “You there, you there. Fancy pants. Have you seen any little blue men?”

“Absolutely. What price are we talking about?”

“You’re selling them?” Gargamel asked in confusion as a mom and her daughter walked by, and she too was on the phone. “Have you looked in the drawer, sweetie?”

“Wait, what drawer?”

“In the kitchen, Lily!”

“Who is this Lily?”

“Are you kidding?” said a man in a plaid shirt. “She's the hottest girl in my department.”

That’s when Gargamel chose to stop him. “Please, please. Please, young woodsman What does the temperature of this Lily have to do with the finding of Smurfs?”

“Take your meds, man,” the ‘woodsman’ stormed off, leaving Gargamel even more confused than before. “Is everyone in this realm completely insane?!”

That’s when a homeless man wheeled a shopping cart by, making Gargamel think he was another wizard. “Pardon me, wise sir? By any chance, have you seen any little blue men?”

“They’re everywhere!” the homeless man said before he wheeled off, and Gargamel became increasingly excited. “I knew it. I knew it! I told you we were close, Azrael.”

Azrael meowed in frustration… this was going to take a while.

XXXXXXXX

At the same time, Papa Smurf was handing out smurfberry rations to everyone in the group-- even the ponies. “Now, just take one, everybody. We have to make sure our smurfberries last.”

“Great…” Grouchy muttered as Izzy took a bite out of her berry, instantly lighting up at the taste. “We're gonna be here how long?”

“Not long, Grouchy,” Sunny smiled. “First thing, we gotta do is find a stargazer. Next, find a book of spells and then smurf you guys up a portal so you can get home! Really simple, everypony.”

Misty sighed. “If defeating Opaline or my mom was that easy, we’d never have to worry about anything again…”

Behind them, Patrick adjusted his tie and gave Elway a pat on the head before he started to head out the door. “Someone looks smurfalish!” Smurfette said. “Uh…” Misty blinked. “Why are you wearing a dog leash?”

“It’s a tie,” Patrick said, unsure of how else to explain it. “Does it… keep your neck warm?” Grouchy asked. “No,” Patrick answered. “Clearly,” said Brainy, “it functions as an aid in his craft, like a blacksmith's apron.”

“I wear it because it's what everyone wears at work,” Patrick explained. “What are you anyway?” Izzy asked. “A pasty giant?”

“I try to get people to buy things by analyzing market trend predictions.”

“Predictions!” Brainy cried. “He’s a fortune teller!”

“Look, I would love to explain,” Patrick said sarcastically, “but I am super late. I gotta go. I really don't have time for this.”

Suddenly, Smurfette gasped as she saw Grace entering the room, wearing a different dress. “What?!” she squealed. “You had one outfit on, and now you're wearing something completely different.”

“Now, Smurfette,” said Papa, “she probably got the other one dirty. Let's not embarrass her.”

“Sorry…”

“Thank you for letting us stay in your… er, mushroom, Miss Grace,” Zipp said with a smile. “It’s really nice.”

“Well, thank you. I'm glad you like it,” Grace said as she knelt down to their level. “I like our little mushroom, too. But you know, somebody wants a bigger mushroom.”

“But… then you’d be further apart,” Smurfette spoke, and Grace nodded in agreement. “You said it, sister. Okay, I've gotta go. I've got an appointment. I've got a baby on the way, so…”

“Wait wait,” Patrick stopped his wife. “We can't just leave them here alone, without an adult.”

“Uh… we’re grown ponies, if you haven’t noticed,” Hitch said cockily. “Sparky is the baby of the group.”

This caused Papa to chuckle. “I’m 546 years old.”

“Of course you are,” Patrick said sarcastically. “Actually, that’s pretty true,” Sunny said. “An alicorn we once faced was over 1000 moons old, so Papa being half that age shouldn’t be that different.”

“They’ll be fine, they’ll be fine,” Grace told her husband before leaving. But before Patrick left, he turned to the group again. “By the way, I wouldn't go anywhere if I were you.”

“Uh… why the hay not?” Pipp asked with a raised eyebrow. “Our world doesn't do well with visitors from other places. I mean, look what happened to E.T.”

“...huh?” the ponies chorused. “The movie?” Patrick tried to explain. “It’s a moving picture book…? Just stay, okay?”

And just like that, Patrick left the room, leaving the ponies and Smurfs alone to themselves. “Great…” Grouchy muttered. “He's gone and we still don't have a stargazer.”

“Izzy, you think you can unicycle something to be a temporary stargazer?” Smurfette asked. “Well… I’m a little too small to carry much of anything,” Izzy frowned. “Sorry. Maybe we can find one outside the apartment?”

“The same place Patrick told us NOT to go?” Hitch raised an eyebrow. “Wait a smurf… I think Izzy is onto something!” Brainy said. “If he's a fortune teller, he reads stars all the time. Ergo, it's at his place of business.”

“Excellent work, Brainy!” Papa praised with a grin. “Well then, what are we waiting for?” Zipp said, galloping past Brainy. “Let's wing it!”

“Come on, guys!”

“Let's go get that stargazer!”

“Yeah!”

But the second Clumsy tripped over his own two feet, Papa sighed worriedly, not sure if bringing Clumsy around would change the outcome of their mission. “Clumsy, I think it might be best if you stay here. You know? Smurf an eye on the mushroom.”

Clumsy looked at everyone else, either giving him unsure and sympathetic glances while some didn't even make eye contact. “Yeah, that's what I was thinking.”

“We'll be back soon, I promise,” Sunny told him with a smile. “Come on, guys-- let's get going and follow Mr. Winslow before he gets too far.”

Clumsy sighed and sat down on the couch as the group made their way toward the window. “Well, I can smurf an eye on the mushroom.”

“Smurfs away!” Hitch cheered as they leapt down to the staircase, where they saw Patrick getting into the 'mechanical wagon' below them. “Clearly,” said Brainy, “that distance is too great...”

“Off you go~!” Gutsy said before kicking Brainy off the ledge, causing the others to jump and follow them, the sisters using their wings to slow the descent of themselves and their friends, while the Smurfs used their hats as parachutes to make it to the taxi before it drove off into the busy streets of the Big Apple.

XXXXXXXX

It seemed to be a good drive before the taxi made a full and complete stop in front of a tall building. “We're stopping,” Papa told the group. “Hold on tight.”

Pipp groaned under Grouchy's tight squeeze. “Not onto me, Grouchy!”

“Oh, did I do that? Sorry...”

“Keep the change,” Patrick said to the taxi driver as he got out of the car, and that's when the group made their move. “Master Winslow!” Papa cried out. “We really need your help!”

“Yoo-hoo!” Misty waved in greeting. “What are you doing here?!” Patrick asked them in a hushed tone. “What part of 'we need a stargazer' don't you understand, you numptie?” Gutsy asked as Patrick looked around. “You can't be out in public!”

“Who are you talking to?” the taxi driver asked, and Patrick flashed a reassuring smile. “If we could just have a quick look around in your predicting parlour…” Papa said. “We really want to go home,” Izzy pleaded. “Come on, man, I gotta go!”

Patrick looked around, knowing there wasn’t a whole lot of options to work with. Finally, he conceded. “Fine. Just come here, come here.”

Quicker than anyone could expect, Patrick grabbed the Smurfs and ponies one by one and stuffed them into his coat. “Hey, what are you doing?” Hitch asked in surprise. “All of you. Trust me.”

“Hey, watch the smurfberries!” Gutsy clamored. “I’m not going… hey!” Grouchy yelped. “This just got really awkward.” Zipp stated. “All of you, just be quiet.” Patrick murmured as he made his way over to the building entrance. “It’s dark in here,” Brainy complained. “All right,” said Grouchy, “who just smurfed?”

Patrick tried to nonchalantly get to his office, but that was easier said than done with a bunch of squirming ponies and Smurfs in his coat.

“Hey! Get your hand off of my kilt.”

“That’s not my hand!”

“It suddenly got really sweaty in here...”

“Hey, ticklish.” Patrick winced and did his best being discrete by greeting others workers as he worked by. “Morning. Morning.”

“Good morning, Mr. Winslow,” a co-worker greeted. “Congratulations on your promotion.”

“Thank you.” Patrick said before he peered down his suit. “I hope you guys like desk drawers, because that’s where…”

“You’re late.” Odile said critically from in front of him. “OOOOdile” Patrick played off casually. “You were in my office.”

“It’s my building, and we have much work to do,” his boss said. “The launch of Jouvenel is tomorrow night. Is your concept ready?”

“Close. I had a crazy morning,” Patrick admitted, dramatically shuffling in place from the movement under his clothes. “What are you doing?” Odile asked. “Nothing. I’m excited. I’m excited about all the concept ideas,” Patrick said quickly, punching his gut. “And hungry. Sorry. Hungry for its success.”

“Nervous energy,” Odile said with an amused smiled. “Nervous energy’s what’s going on up in here,” Patrick pointed up to his head. “I like it.” Odile said. “The fear of failure is a fabulous motivator.”

As she walked away, Patrick was approached by another higher-up. “Henri.”

“Make it work.” Henri said ominously before also walking away. “You have no idea.”

“What is this?”

“Why do I get the armpit?”

“Stop pushing me.”

“I can’t breathe.”

“Go easy on the cologne tomorrow.”

Patrick then entered his office, making sure the doors were shut tight so none of them could get out and no one heard what he was saying. “Are you crazy?” he asked as he dropped the Smurfs and ponies onto his desk. “You’re gonna get me fired!”

“My hair.” Smurfette said sadly as Patrick began to cover the windows. “I couldn’t even breathe in there. It smelled like the business end of a sheep,” Gutsy said. “I don’t see a stargazer,” Hitch said looking around as he kept Sparky close. “I'm sorry, Master Winslow,” said Papa, “but we badly need to borrow your stargazer.”

“I don’t have a stargazer, okay?” Patrick said irritated. “It’s not something people of this century just have, especially here.”

“Not happy.” Grouchy grumbled. “So, we through all that for nothing?” Izzy asked dejectedly. “I’m not happy about either,” Patrick said. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have work to do.”

“Well, perhaps we could sing to help things along.” Papa offered. “And then we’ll get the stargazer. Come along, everyone.”

All: La la la la la la
Sing a happy song

La la la la la la
Smurf the whole day long

“Stop.”

La la la la la la

“STOP!!” Patrick shouted, and the singing died down almost immediately. “Come on. None of you find that song just the tiniest bit annoying?”

“I find it annoying,” Grouchy raised his hand, only for Pipp to nudge him scoldingly. “I think he means other than you, Grouchy.”

“Well, what do you sing at work?” Papa asked. “I don’t sing at work.” Patrick replied, and this caused the group to gasp. “What?!”

“No singing at all?!”

“And you have to wear a leash?” Harsh.”

“I know. How about we hum,” Smurfette said, and the Smurfs began humming the same tune, but after a moment, Patrick stopped that as well. “I need to hone in my message here.”

“Oh, I’ve got a message,” Brainy said. “Always chew with your mouth closed. Papa taught us that.”

“That’s good. You should use that.” Papa said. “Or, dance and be happy.” Smurfette chimed in. “How about, 'Grab life by that grapes'?” Sunny said. “Turn that frown upside down.”

“Always bet on blue.”

“Have a Smurfy day.”

“I kissed a Smurf and I like it?”

Patrick and ponies gave Smurfette a weird look. “It’s an embarrassment of riches,” Papa said. “They’re giving you gold here.”

“Thank you.”

“Master Winslow, you’ll know it’s the right message if it comes from the heart. Right, Smurfs?”

“You said it.”

“Absolutely.”

“Of course.”

Grouchy sighed and rolled his eyes before glancing up at Patrick. “Welcome to my world.”

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