- Member Since 6th Jan, 2012
- offline last seen Aug 15th, 2022
Fimbulvinter
Yea, I'm a writer and I occasionally freelance as an editor or collaborator.
Fimbulvinter
Joined 6th Jan, 2012 ·
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Why is lunaismywaifu suh a damn good artist?
Once again you have captured my attention.
I'm hooked.
~Skeeter The Lurker
I have the most understandable boner right now.
2780682 Don't know but I am very thankful that it is so, as those pics are a gold mine of fic inspiration.
2781270 Be sure to relieve that boner. The fun doesn't really start until Chapter 2
2781698
Yeah, now he just needs to get off his ass and finish Happiness Lies Across The Room...
Two things.
One: So far this seems like a great fic and I can't wait for the next part (There better be a next part)
Two: Nice dedication to Julia "the bitch" Gillard. I am both glad and concerned about Rudd's new leadership. Aussie Pride!
2781941 Don't worry, there will be a next part - Note the 'incomplete' status.
I'm also worried about having Rudd back. People seem to have forgotten that there was a reason he was ousted in the first place. The only winner in all of this has been Abbott and the Coalition. And of course this is going to start up new questions about what really happened back in the March spill, given that Rudd did a total 180 from his comments about the 'There are no circumstances in which I will seek re-election' promise from back then, and Creans now pointless resignation
Note, royal guards do not seem to wear any underwear, or ANYTHING under their armor.
How about you rewrite this into "I wasn't a total prude, but I'm a total prude"?
2785310 And their dicks appear to be metallic themselves. Or at least freakishly hard, like the carapace of a changeling for exa... wow. MIND BLOWN!
2786228 So Chrysalis was rescuing her subjects being held captive by Celestia as sex toys?
2788282 Totally makes sense when you think about it.
2788282 ... why do i wish i was a changeling now? seriously, im gay, i shouldnt be feeling this
2790065 Chrysalis and Celestia fighting for you, gee, I dunno.
2790065 Two deadly, nighpowerful, sexual beings fighting over you.
Gee, I dunno why you wouldn't wish to be a changeling.
THIS has been a story I've been hoping someone would someday write!
>Cliffhanger
>on the middle of a sex scene
REPORTED AND DISLIKED
WHAT KIND OF MONSTER ARE YOU-
More, sir, please.
You're blue-balling me man. I need PT.2 NOW.
Goddamnit man, you can't leave us hanging like this! We demand copious amounts of MOAR!
not bad i guess (im not much of a critic on clop), and i enjoyed it
Aaaah. Now THAT's more like it.
Great little clopfic, I'll admit though, I was rooting for Vigil to get reassigned to Ponyville.
CONSARNIT! Why must this be so short?
It was good, but one thing really bothers me: how did Vigil produce semen if he had a vasectomy?
I'm actually really looking forward to that sequel. I really like how you described everything.
2803023 semen and sperm are two different things, though often and incorrectly used interchangeably; something of which I am just a guilty of doing.
The white ejaculate fluid is semen. This is the delivery mechanism for the sperm - the actual reproductive cells. it is produced in the seminal vesticle. Sperm are produced in the testicles and are added to the semen in the ejaculatory duct.
Getting snipped in the vas deferens blocks the access from the testicles to the duct, but doesn't prevent semen from being released.
A man with a vasectomy can still ejaculate, but cannot impregnate. See here for more info.
2803293 The real question is which path I should go for the sequel. Have Twilight ask Rarity for advice, or jump ahead to the next month?
2804342
I say go to rarity with the whole Big Mac thing. Then after that you can go to the next month.
Gentlemen, you already had my attention, but now you have my curiosity.
2846499 It's the way that I like to write - highly graphic to the point that the reader can actually picture the scene in their heads clearly.
It's not for everyone and I make no apologies for my style.
Thanks for not mindlessly hating it.
2847240 I decently don't hate it! I just don't want to keep reading :P
This is Kalash93 from Authors Helping Authors with a review for your story.
Grammatik: 10. I couldn't find anything wrong with it.
Pros:
1. It was damn hot.
2. You put effort into making the first time a memorable occasion.
3. The story was well written.
Cons:
1. It would have worked better as a oneshot.
2. The sex was not wholly realistic.
3. Characterization was flimsy.
Comments: This was a really good clopfic. I'm impressed. You made the story and the sex really hot. I'm no stranger to clopfiction, and this one is going to be in my top favourites. I like how you made Twilight Sparkle losing her virginity a memorable occasion. It didn't forced or crass, despite the engineered situation. You made it obvious that Twilight wantd it and that there was a small character arc in regards to her sexuality. The whole story was pretty damn good. Now, I would have rather seen this done as a oneshot. The chapter break interrupts the flow and seems rather needless. One can argue that it demarkates the split between which one of the ladies is participating and which one is watching, but it feels out of place. I'd almost dare say that it was done so that the really good part could be saved for a later chapter, thus netting this story two view spikes instead of just one lump when it was uploaded, but I'm being pretty cynical and hypothetical about that. The sex, while quite hot, was not wholly realistic, but I'll let that slide. This is fantastical porn and it's not excessively breaking with reality to the point where I have to start pointing out the problems. Lastly, the characterization seemed a little week and OOC to varying degrees for Twilight and Celestia. Your male lead was a good nice guy, but he has so little personality and draw that I have already forgotten his name and I don't care to go back and look for it. Oh well tt's a clopfic and I don't have much to complain about. Overall, it's really damn good. It was a hot, sexy blast to read and I found it to be very well done on multiple levels. You win 9/10 flutteryays, which is something I only give out to fics that really impress me. It's really really damn good, possibly great,, but falls short of perfection.
I hope you enjoyed your review..
Could you please go give my story, A Pleasant Surprise (URL: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/93809/a-pleasant-surprise) a read and review? Thank you very much!
As always I love your humanised work!
Let Lunaismywaifu keep inspiring you with their pics!
Is there a sequel?
3524048 Not yet. Other stories keep getting in the way.