When I woke up, the first thing I did was not investigate my surroundings. Neither was it searching for my weapons, which I had been deprived of for some reason. Nor did I go off seeking vengeance for the rather violent abuse of my manhood. It did involve my manhood though. It also included the fetal position, tears and a lot of swearing.
Like you can blame me! I’ll bet you three thousand caps that kick would’ve put a dent in a set of T-51b! I’d like to see you even stand up afterwards! I sure as fuck couldn’t.
Twilight’s ears flattened as the human awoke, making a lot of noise in the process. During his unconsciousness, she had attempted to remove the strange thing on his arm. No matter what she did, the locking mechanism had proven far too stubborn, resisting her every attempt. So she used the time until he woke up to find a solution to the language barrier. Which she had.
She was actually in the middle of an attempt to circumvent the problem when he woke up. Doing her best to ignore the pained moaning, she focused on her only copy of the Canterlot Institute of Linguistics Equestrian-Zebrican/Zebrican-Equestrian Dictionary (8th Edition). She had never tried this spell before, never having a need to do so in the past.
She failed to notice the human stop his pained complaints to take notice of the intensifying glow coming from her horn. The pages of the dictionary seemed to be caught in a gale. Her face was twisted in concentration, doing everything in her considerable power to make sure that the spell succeeded.
The flow of magic stopped and Twilight took a step back from the book, a little dazed. She now had, in addition to the other information that ran rampant through her mind, a whole other language. She stumbled about giddily as she tested her new knowledge. “Oh wow,” she said, surprised at the unfamiliar, yet perfectly intelligible sounds. “It worked!” she exclaimed in perfect Zebrican. She began to giggle as she closed the dictionary and returned it to its spot among the bookshelves.
Twilight’s mild euphoria at having accomplished this feat of magic was brought to a complete stop when she heard a strange metallic clicking noise.
“Next time you take my weapons, take all of them.”
She turned to meet the owner of the gruff voice. Sitting on his posterior, pointing some strange metal thing at her, wearing the foulest look she had ever seen on a living creature (and she had been around Angel, Fluttershy’s pet rabbit), was the human.
So I was being dramatic. What of it? Not like you’d be able to resist, right?
I’m just glad her search for my weapons was quick and sloppy, just like the goons in the casinos. They never check your boots for a knife, look for hidden pockets with brass knuckles inside or think you’ve got a revolver tucked into the back of your pants. I know for a fact you’ve got a combat knife strapped underneath the body plate of that combat armor, I can see the tip of the handle. By the way, just who are Rei - ?
Oh, right, the story. So yes, I always go everywhere with a .44 Magnum tucked into the back of my pants. Probably not really safe, but I’d rather not be completely unarmed. Why the Magnum? Well, partly because I have a soft spot for revolvers. Mainly, though, its accuracy and power in a small, easy-to-carry package. You ever been shot with one? Who am I asking, of course you have. You’ve seen how easy people go down. And parts to maintain them are common, too. Cheap, powerful and durable. Ammo can be a bitch, but I only ever have the six shots. Usually all I need to get to my other weapons.
I wasn’t going to shoot her. Intimidate her, yes, but I would never actually harm someone without good reason. Raiders are different, they’ll take every opportunity they get. Then again, she did take my weapons and for all I knew I was being held hostage. But being held hostage usually involves rope and lack of movement. No, wait, that’s a night at the Gomorrah. Hostage situations include weapons! And as far as I was concerned, that horn could easily be one. I was practically in the same room with a perfectly sane Glowing One. All she had to do was start throwing radiation at me and I was as good as dead.
I wasn’t clearly thinking at that point. After all, I did just wake up after taking a hit to the balls that would knock out a Deathclaw Alpha in power armor. Wow, that’s a terrifying thought. I was without most of my weapons. I didn’t know where I was. For all I knew, they were gonna lock me up and do things to me.
So I just sat there, pointing the revolver at her and giving her a death glare. Let me tell you, it was taking so much willpower at that time to not burst out laughing.
It took Twilight a moment to properly take note of the significant parts of what he had said. He had just said something about all his weapons. The fact that one was being pointed at her meant that she had not gotten them all. There was also the possibility that he had even more concealed on him. This meant she now had a dangerous, possibly-heavily armed, and most certainly furious alien inside her house, and she was all alone with him. “Eep.”
There was a tense silence, only broken when the human let out a strangled snort and collapsed into complete laughter, lowering the supposed weapon in the process. Shortly before cringing and grabbing his crotch. “Ohhh. Still hurts.”
Twilight blinked before realising what was going on. “That was a joke!?” she asked loudly. “How is that even funny!?” The alien just blinked, not understanding a word she said. She let out an aggravated sigh and repeated herself in Zebrican.
“You just don’t have my sense of humour,” he replied mockingly. “And since when could you speak English?”
“English?” Twilight asked. “What are you talking about? We’re speaking in Zebrican.”
There was a rather strange silence at that point. “For the sake of this conversation progressing, let’s just say that we’re both right, okay?” the human asked, his tone making it clear that he wanted nothing to do with this topic. “After all, I have a few questions.”
“No! How can we both be right?” Twilight Sparkle argued. “We’re debating about what the name of the language is, it’s logically impossible for us both to be correct!”
All she got for her trouble was an unamused look and the human putting the palm of his hand on his face. “I’m asking questions now,” he said, ignoring her. “Who are you, where am I, and where can I find the one who-” That was when the door opened, revealing Applejack, holding a basket of baked goods in her mouth. “YOU!” the human yelled furiously, pointing the strange thing at her.
I very nearly pulled the trigger there and then. After all, she had kicked me in the balls. The last idiot to do that, I think it was one of the Legion’s assassins, I ended up stomping on his throat and gouging out his eyes. A bullet to the head would have been merciful, really.
Of course, my body decided that there and then was a good time to inform me that I had not eaten since I arrived in that world. I guess the smell of food was enough to remind me. I’m pretty sure that eased the tension. I kept the gun levelled at her. Yeah, another female. I didn’t think much of it at the time.
“Give me the food, and I’ll forget about what you did.” I had to wait for her friend to translate. There was a rather dangerous silence (honestly, I was worried the purple one would try and smite me with radiation) in which I decided, there and then, I would have to find a way around that. I did not like the idea of being followed by some purple horse thing that could ghoulify me if I looked at her wrong.
“Twi,” Applejack said quietly, having dropped the basket of apology pies, “Ah thought you said you was gonna take his weapons from him.”
“I thought I did. He had it hidden on him,” the unicorn whispered back. She listened to the growling come from his stomach, followed by his request. “He says that he’ll forgive you for what you did if you give him the food.”
“That’s why Ah brought it over in the first place.” She nudged the basket closer to him, remembering Twilight’s warning about his hostility towards magic. She looked up at him with what she hoped would come across as an apologetic smile before backing away slowly, keeping a wary eye on the strange metal thing it was holding.
Would you believe me if I were to say that the orange pony that gave me food had a cowboy hat? No, honestly, a great big Stetson. She had her mane done up in a ponytail too. A horse with a ponytail, I know.
Having got the food, I put the gun down. I got what I wanted, and I didn’t think they were much of a threat. They just seemed so innocent. You ever had apple pie? Like, an actual, real apple pie, instead of one of those two-hundred year old things with more preservatives than actual fruit? It was like sex for my sense of taste. We will never have anything that tastes anywhere near as good as those things did here in the Wasteland. Ever. What? No I don’t have any of those pies here.
I don’t know how long it took me, but I ate the whole damn lot. I ended up feeling sick afterwards, but it was worth it. Y’know, there’s no real place for etiquette and table manners out there. After all, you take too long to eat something and next thing you know your camp is swarming with coyotes, bloatflies and every other mutated animal trying to kill you for a quick meal. So yeah, I tore through them like a Deathclaw tears through molerats. “Those were good.”
Look, the taste of those pies was like taking a dozen hits of Jet. There was no way in hell I was going to be coherent.
Author’s Notes:
The T-51b. 5 inches thick and capable of stopping everything short of anti-tank rounds. Still won’t stop Applejack.
Also, Google Docs says that ‘Zebrican’ is a real word. A Google search netted me pictures of Zecora’s plot. I’m cool with that.
wow new chapter?
Excellent...Can't wait for more and DAMN... Not even a T-51b. can stop Applejack, and that's some heavy shit bro
Language barrier? NEVER FEAR TWILIGHT IS HERE!
Good chapter. Here's a 'stache
425190
Not really much for that mod and I would prefer not taking any Intense Training perks, so I'll stick with it the way it is.
Thanks for the help anyway.
*searches zebrian*
DAT PLOT
T-51b is worthless against those bucking legs.
A great chapter once again. I like the way you handled the language barrier, making a work around while keeping it intact. And I still REALLY enjoy the way you personify the characters, i dont think i've seen many do it as good as or better then you.
And my first guess for who the Courier is talking to is Mercenary Norton, solely because you said combat armor, and he's the only named i could find wearing it on fallout wiki. I'm doubtful though so i'll keep tryin.
This is a great story. Its awesomeness can not be described in words.
Wait till he trys some of Pinkies cupcakes, he'll overload on sugar.
447542
...
His reaction to the ungodly amount of sugar will be something like this.
edge.ebaumsworld.com/picture/jolly916/ICanSeeForever.JPG
Calling it now: Talking to the Lone Wanderer. 'Rei' is probably Reilly's Rangers. They had their name printed in white on their combat armour, and a set of rangers armour is a possible reward for their quest, as an alternative to the minigun Eugene.
Yes, I am a nerd.
600785
It's kinda depressing that you were the only one to pick that up...
I couldn't stop laughing in the first paragraph/part of this chapter
I just pick this up. Your Lone Wander is wearing Ranger battle armor. I normally have the Winterized T-51b power armor on, due for it never have to be repaired and high rad resistance, plus it look cool when armed with the Gauss rifle.
Apology pies?
That's adorable!
Yeah, as soon as you put down Rei- all I could think of was THAT QUEST.
Reilly's Rangers to the rescue woo!
I'm pretty sure it's the lone wonderer mostly because of the armor description, so I did some research and found "Rei-"lly's rangers.
Yep, he's talking to the Reilly's Rangers armour clad Lone Wanderer.
Actually, in my headcanon, the Lone Wanderer is the Courier. A bit lengthy to explain, but whatever, just puttin' that out there.
450481 your image doesnt work.
the T-51b is also not as strong as the T-51a which while not as good for radiation or noxious gases is actually two inches thicker and can stop anti-tank rounds at long distance. though it still crushes anything beneath it when it does get hit though. I personally prefer Enclave armour (can't remember type.) .50 cal rounds are not anti-tank but the still rip through T-51b armour.
1272740 the enclave tesla armor has a higher radiation resistance and an energy weapons boost. the standard enclave power armor has a lower radiation resistance and (i think...) a strength stat boost
from his reaction to the food she should be named Applecrack instead of Applejack.
1272740
Actually only DU .50cal rounds would do that in-verse. It's resistant to anything less.
actaully, the description of the t51b states that it can stop kinetic impacts of up to 2500 joules which yranslate to about 1800 foot pounds of energy which is equivalent to a standard ak47 round.
3852322
Or a .50 Action Express round.
4055277 or a knife for some apparent reason. seriously, throwing knife killed a guy wearing that armor in two throws.
lolroflmao.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/o-rly.jpg
So if the Courier and Commander Shepard from Mass Effect got into a fight, which one do you think would win? And I mean one on one, no companions allowed.
5612237 Courier
this guys sense of humor is wonderful
so you were quaintly introduced to sweat Zebrican plot with Zecora as a model? By google no less?
Wait.....Fucking METRO?!? YUUUUS!
I looked it up and I got a picture of dinosaurs having sex... At least that's what it looked like.
Also this...
fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/274/0/a/commission__hot__hot__hot__by_akashasi-d5gik80.png
6080342
Not really. AJ's said to be the best baker in Ponyville. Add to that the fact that wasteland food is canonically said to be like somewhat flavored cardboard, and the difference would be ebough to make grown men weep for joy.
6210320
It seems far more likely that "Rei-" is a cut-off "Reiley's Rangers."
don't remember if it's canon or just thrown there but there is physically no way to have a body armor that thick...^^;;;
Nope. A pony with a ponytail.
Not better, though. Worse, in fact.
9405078
It's canon. With that in mind the depiction of power armor being more of a mecha than body armor in Fallout 4 makes a whole lot of sense.