The Conversion Bureau: The Last Chapters

by Parcly Taxel

...One Plan Back

“Well, what took you so long to get here, ponies?” Twilight inquired, always being the serious one in times of criticality.
“We were teleported by some temple pony to San Francisco. It took us seven hours to get back here!”
“I know that temple pony. Your reason is accepted. Now, let's concentrate and formulate a plan to stop the Human Liberation Front from destroying Equestria.”

There was a door in front of them, that led into the lodge. It was brown and looked like any other door across the street, and inside was a room illuminated with a mellow yellow glow. Occupying the central table were Fluttershy, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Rarity.
“How long has Twilight been outside? Is she coming back in ten seconds?” Rainbow asked.
“Not sure, sugarcube!” Applejack replied.
Then Rarity began “I'm more into fashion, but I'll wait for-”
BANG!
“Oh... what was that?” Fluttershy squealed in awe.
“It's them!” All four could see Twilight, Pinkie, Ethan, Barry and Spike surrounded by the door frame.
“We'll get things straight,” the lavender unicorn commanded.

All eight ponies lounged around a table, with Spike on Twilight's back, ready to record the plan on paper as it was created through conversation. “Now, ponies, we know what this is all about. In a very short time, those radicals are going to attack Equestria with all their weapons. We have the spells on hand to strenghten the magic barrier – we now have to implement them.”
Ethan, building on his reasoning in the car, added his words. “The operation cannot be purely physical – we're going to use psychology to our advantage, and use it first.”
“I see what you mean. You love and tolerate the humans, and want to welcome them to our community rather than leave them out. So, how are we going to accomplish this?”
“First, we have a very powerful tool at our disposal – the public radio system. Twilight, have you seen any radio station nearby?”
“Applejack! Rainbow! Pinkie! Have you seen any building with a large pointy thing sticking out from the top?”
“Well, course I did.” Applejack replied, in her ever-present Southern dialect.
“Good. Barry, are you listening?”
“Yes.”
“I believe you have studied enough under me to teleport across walls.” She took out a map of Newark, and laid it down on the table. Thinking like a supercomputer, she formulated the rest of the plan in two seconds, then continued. “What I want you to do is to teleport into the building right over here,” pointing to a shape that had the words “NPR Office” across it.
“But I may get arrested for breaking in!”
“I'm sure you will use magic to your advantage. Besides, the employees of the building, security guards included, have almost entirely vacated to the Conversion Bureaus. I expect your trip up to be hassle-free.”
“OK. Once I get in, what do I do?”
“Get to the radio room, which is on the very top floor. Then broadcast a message, directed to the HLF members, pretending to be de Lancie regretting over his actions.”
“No, I can't lie!”
Ethan explained Twilight's plan to Barry. “Since every person in the HLF trusts de Lancie, as well as announcements made over the radio system, it should cause most, if not all, of the members to flock to the Conversion Bureau.”
“Oh.”
Fluttershy expressed her views on the plan as it had been read out. “I do not have complete faith in this plan. There are some people, like de Lancie, who will not surrender at all, even when blasted with a full-on radio message. Are you sure you've considered that?”
Twilight continued with the rest of the plan. “Of course I did. I'm sure that there will be a delay between the airing and the attack, which includes things like organising the pack and preparing weapons. During that time, we will strengthen the magic barrier. The Equestrian military, still shiny after years of idling in Canterlot, will be on tap to deal with any leftovers.”
Ethan suddenly remembered the topic that had gone adrift. “Oh, but what about that pony we fought in The Ruins of the Ancient Pony Sisters?”
“You remembered? Thanks. Well, they're the guardians of the temple, still there after centuries. They maintain a secret hideout somewhere under the area of the temple we searched for the spells, where they live and flourish.”
“Then why did it send me, Barry and Pinkie back to my backyard on the other side of the United States?”
“The obvious answer is that the temple is a place to be treaded on softly. When you were trying to obtain the spells, Pinkie made so much noise – I could hear it from the west wing – that the guardians deemed it unbearable. Hehe, I have something else.”
Twilight looked at Pinkie's eyes and smirked. “What have you done? You have wasted a significant amount of time that we could have used to prepare for the operation! Just by shouting!”
Pinkie seemed not to care. “Well at least the party isn't-”
“This is NOT a party. The fate of Equestria could depend on this!”
“Fine. I for one welcome our new lavender overlord.”

Noting it was 3am, Spike motioned to the ponies. “OK, I've recorded everything you've talked about regarding the plan.” Passing the note to Twilight, he continued “Please familiarise yourself with all the details, and pass this clockwise when you're done.” The ponies read the note in the following order: Twilight, Pinkie, Applejack, Barry, Rainbow, Fluttershy, Rarity, Ethan. Having been the last to absorb the details, Ethan handed it back to Spike, and questioned “But when is the operation going to start? It's not mentioned at all inside!”
Rainbow replied, “As soon as possible!”
Twilight, interpreting this as sufficiently vague to merit a clarification, snapped back. “Don't be too general, Rainbow!” She looked at Ethan. “We expect the bonanza to start in nine hours – high noon.”
“Understood. I do note that we are still not sleeping, despite it being so much in the middle of the morning. Can we sleep?”
“Oh, sure.” A loud yawn could be heard from Rarity.

As the ponies and Spike and went to sleep, Ethan thought about the physical differences between humans and ponies, and how the ponified humans were adjusting to their new form.

The most obvious difference is that ponies have four legs, and that they have hooves with no appendages. Of course, that is not a problem – all of the new ponies I've observed can use their hooves as plates of some sort. Or their teeth. Or in the case of unicorns, their magic – they get the hang of it really fast. It's a shame that most human implements were designed with fingers in mind, but such is life.

Then you have the three types. Humans can be male or female, but it's the exact same thing for ponies. Regarding the body colour, humans can look blue all over ONLY because the blue was painted. Rainbow Dash has a natural blue coat. I've seen many other colours not seen in humans – Fluttershy is yellow, Twilight is lavender, Pinkie is the colour of her name. Is this a property of ponies to have their coats in all colours? ...Well, yes. Oh wait, what am I thinking? The types! I learned in biology class about hereditary traits – widow's peak, tongue-rolling, earlobes – but the types of ponies seem to have far more widespread social implications than most other traits. For example, there's Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. Then there's Cloudsdale, which Twilight taught me about when I first awoke in Twilight's library. This would be considered segregation in the eyes of humans, but in ponies? No. We ponies don't care about the abilities of other types. We are happy with our own type, we strive to make the most of our abilities. Surely Equestria is a better place than the United States in terms of integration – possibly better than the entire human world as well.

The manes of the ponified humans seem to be consistent with human hairstyles, in contrast to their coats. I remember Lauren Faust, now working as an artist and author in Canterlot, reported in the news after she got ponified and turned up as an alicorn – a really rare sight indeed. Red mane, white coat, long horn, majestic wings. Yes, she did have red hair when she was a human. I had blonde hair before that ponymycin injection, Barry had it brown. This is really weird – a chemical preserving one trait and changing a closely related trait. I don't have time to think about this now, however.

Eating is a necessity, no doubt, but the closest thing I've come to a bathroom in Ponyville is the local spa. Inexistence! What could this mean? Something comes in, but nothing comes out. What is this, magic? It could be. Magic that is used to give us our characteristic traits – tending the animals, walking on clouds, doing telekinesis shenanigans and the like.

And then there are the cutie marks – symbols inscribed on most native ponies' flanks, but not on much of the ponified humans, as of now. They never appear on humans, and they appear to be connected with the talents of the ponies they appear on. Looking at the lack of a cutie mark on my flank, Twilight consoled me when I was at the meeting with Princess Celestia, telling me I still have a lot of potential, a lot to discover about myself. Not bad.

Comments

[Microshazm]

I really hope you're intentionally mimicing Blaze's style of writing, though it still isn't very good. You say it's necessary to read the original chapters, but you still explain everything that's going on. 'Nuff said you need to do better if you are to catch anyone's attention.

[Parcly Taxel]

425002 Well actually, I never intended this to be official, but I tried to mimic Blaze's anti-grimdark style. I put the link just to give more background - standalone is fine. The air here is serious, owing to the sheer importance of the operation, and the writing, therefore, downright sharp. Hence the nearly endless lines of dialogue by Twilight. The next chapter will put everything that's been elaborated in The Plan into action. "The Final Showdown", to be exact.

I particularly wanted to capture the "second thoughts" made by Ethan throughout the original chapters. (This is mentioned in the original's prologue and in this story's description, and are rather rare in the first 11 chapters.) Hence the long lines of italic words spread throughout the two chapters.

[King Rhaegas Targaryen]

425020 but I tried to mimic Blaze's anti-grimdark style

Blaze's anti-grimdark style

anti-grimdark

images.sodahead.com/polls/002641083/3649326924_lol_guy_answer_1_xlarge.jpeg

[Black Iron Tarkus]

Then you have the three types. Humans can be male or female, but it's the exact same thing for ponies. Regarding the body colour, humans can look blue all over ONLY because the blue was painted. Rainbow Dash has a natural blue coat. I've seen many other colours not seen in humans – Fluttershy is yellow, Twilight is lavender, Pinkie is the colour of her name. Is this a property of ponies to have their coats in all colours? ...Well, yes. Oh wait, what am I thinking? The types! I learned in biology class about hereditary traits – widow's peak, tongue-rolling, earlobes – but the types of ponies seem to have far more widespread social implications than most other traits. For example, there's Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. Then there's Cloudsdale, which Twilight taught me about when I first awoke in Twilight's library. This would be considered segregation in the eyes of humans, but in ponies? No. We ponies don't care about the abilities of other types. We are happy with our own type, we strive to make the most of our abilities. Surely Equestria is a better place than the United States in terms of integration – possibly better than the entire human world as well.

...................................................was that supposed to be deep?