The Conversion Bureau: The Last Chapters

by Parcly Taxel

Keynote

Ethan's heart rate shot into space as he yanked the golden ticket off his nose, gasping and screaming like he had just conquered Mount Dragonshy. With Pinkie situated nearby, his purple wings flared out, brushing her face with a feather.
“Ooh, that tickles!” She sprung up and down, triggering vibrations throughout the tree library, as her tail twitched. “Hold on, isn't that a ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala? Why, it's the most amazing super-duper terrifically popular tremendous fantabulous party in all of Equestria! My tongue is now a-”
“Keep your mouth shut,” Twilight ordered from below. “I'm talking important things with Barry down here.”
Struggling to control his emotions, Ethan pushed himself out the bed, seeing stars sprinkled over his field of view the next moment. “Wow... what have I got here? This event is just spectacular – and I'm invited!” He gazed on his ticket, falling into a slight trance.
“My Pinkie Sense was right all along! Should I throw a party?”
“No, no, no. I just need to calm down and discuss with Twilight regarding what's going on here!”

Daylight basked Ethan in its harsh white rays, as the clops sounded one-by-one from the wooden stairs. Still chuckling from Pinkie's antics, he bowed forward and recounted his journey, from his scepticism regarding ponification to the acquirement of his cutie mark.

17 years old, and with two hands, I wasn't sure what to do. I had this clipping on the wall about the ponies from Equestria and the Conversion Bureaus. For days I examined it, the details and its premise, but I couldn't convince myself.

Then I did it. I went up to the centre and received that shot of ponymycin. Along with Barry, I was immediately treated to the advantages of being a pony. However, I still had doubts – was staying in the old form better after all? Discussions with Twilight – who brought me here – and her five friends only served to feed the fire.

We were called up by Princess Celestia to deal with the Human Liberation Front and their inevitable strike. On the way there, we faced hardships that tested us to breaking point, and I still had dreams where I was a human – at one point, I regretted my conversion. I pulled through it, but another question soon appeared – what was to be kept of humanity if nothing could be?

I came to realise that the answer was knowledge, the information that helps societies, whether human or pony, to progress and prosper. I told that to Twilight, and now I'm getting rewarded. What am I going to do after this? Am I going to just hang out, take a look around Equestria and get blown away – or actually help others?

“What are you talking about?” Ethan inquired, trotting up towards the table where two ponies were conversing.
“Oh, we're discussing future residences and stuff,” Barry replied, extending his right hoof. “The three of us – you, me and Jimmy – are getting our own house from Twilight.”
“Why?” Ethan's mouth was raised in disbelief. “I thought this place was comfortable enough, and she was kind to let us stay here...”
“She can't handle us in the guest beds for long.” Without warning, he then turned to the entrance. “Hey, look! Jimmy has come back.”
A blade of wind perturbed the ponies' manes for a split second, as a characteristic fading rainbow trail ended just shy of the bookshelves. In its wake cantered forth a peach earth pony, his auburn hair only a distraction from the grin that occupied half his face.
“First!” Rainbow shouted. “Hello to all of you!”
“What? Never mind, hello to you.” Ethan was recovering from vertigo induced by the abrupt entry. “Jimmy, how's it like being a pony?”
“I was guiding him all over Ponyville, and all the time he was like 'this is more awesome than awesome!' He's simply radical – second to me of course!”
“Don't call me that!” Jimmy furrowed his eyebrows. “I was only ponified yesterday!”
“It's just Rainbow doing her thing, and-” Ethan unexpectedly paused. “Wait, why did I get a spot at the Grand Galloping Gala?”
“You're going to present a keynote speech alongside me there,” Twilight answered. “The event will be focused on the conservation of knowledge.”
“That's related to what they call purification, right?” Barry levitated up a book lying on the table, thinking it contained the relevant information.
“100% correct. Yesterday, Ethan told me about this, and I sent what he said to Princess Celestia.” Flipping her purple mane, she glimpsed him hovering over the table, oblivious to a shadow cast on his back. “She... couldn't help but to accept that purification has its drawbacks.”
“I know, right? Because then we miss out on-”
The pegasus was cut short by a sudden push to his back, causing him to momentarily release the involuntary mental controls for his wings. Two seconds later, Pinkie Pie made a party scene, with her hooves moving and tapping until they were tangled like spaghetti.
“Let's turn the gala into our very own splendid party of splendidness! After all, it's about celebrating till you've got a pretzel, right?”
“Not exactly pretzels.” Ethan could already hear the dance music playing. “It's just us, and them, and some more of them, having fun at the gala...”
Everypony giggled at each other, for they knew that regardless of how important the event was, their hearts would be satisfied.

---

“What are the others going to do, Twilight?” Ethan asked, his mane waving in the cool wind. “I mean, are they just going to hang around, or are they actually doing work?”
“They will be in the audience, listening to what we say.” With a frowned expression, she stuck her head out of the chariot, the green “A-OK” light blinking in her mind.

Canterlot. The sky hanging over it was a deep blue, Princess Luna's presence manifesting in a white circle that no longer bore her mark. This – and the stars, which revealed and concealed numerous patterns in their rhapsody of twinkles – had been an everlasting spark for ponies everywhere, and had paved the way for countless events, including the gala. As always, Equestria's capital showed its sophistication in architecture, dancing streams of water only a backdrop for towers which dominated their landscape. Crowds formed in irregular but well-defined shapes around the castle entrance, their hopes and emotions visible from above as a conglomerate scene of chatting and dresses.

“You have arrived at your destination,” one of the chariot pullers informed.
Twilight put two hooves forward, then the other two, without any delay in her motion. Ethan acted in the opposite way, unable to move a muscle in his seat, and looking forward with nothing in his focus.
“Get out!” the other royal guard ordered. “We have other passengers to ferry!”
A yelp came out from the purple pegasus, as he spread his wings and flew out. Rejoining Twilight on the ground, he tried to recall what was on the roster and what was expected of him.

OK... first, we enter Celestia's castle through its side door, which has been done. Then we get dressed up for our keynote speech. After this, it's formal time – no fooling around in the hallways, lest we become objects of observation via Luna. Walk up to the stage, deliver the speech, hopefully receive more than a bit of applause. Next, we attend the ball with our friends, and then we go home. Simple, right? Actually, not so – more responsibility is on our shoulders than other attendees, because we're the speakers that are not VIPs...

“The dresses for us are in this room.” Twilight stopped at a plain oak door illuminated by the yellow light of chandeliers, surrounding its doorknob with her magenta aura.
“Are you sure this is the correct room?” Pockets of warm air formed under Ethan, instigating the feathers to fan out as he raised his right hoof from the brown carpet underneath.
“Certainly. This whole place has been second nature to me since Princess Cadance was my foalsitter.” She turned back to see a pair of outstretched wings. “Quick! Shut them before somepony notices!”
“Oh, forgot about that!” Hyperventilating from the sudden contraction, he trotted inside to see several racks of clothes. “Mine is the only one on the blue rack, right?”
Twilight smirked. “Just follow me and you'll be fine.” While the fasteners on her dress moved without interruption, Ethan was fighting with clothing that his body refused to slip into. “Wait, you're having a problem putting that on?”
“Yes, if you can see!”
“I'll help you then.” Smiling, she untangled the knotted dress and laid it straight on his back. “After all, magic is the single privilege of unicorns.”

Heavy shadows were cast on both ponies, as they stepped up to the stage. Every step they took, their ominous sound amplified through solid black walls erected on both sides, seemed to foreshadow an outside invasion or other irreversible disaster. They clearly knew what would happen next, but were at the same time unsure – whether they would receive a standing ovation or rotten tomatoes. Then the lights were dropped, and a podium with two microphones and two files on it became apparent. One file was lavender with seven six-pointed stars embedded on its front, and the other had a white arrow and seven bits of glass layered over its purple cover. An audience of a thousand were condescending on them, two ponies who started it all.

“Are you ready?” Twilight whispered to Ethan. “We're alternating paragraphs.”
“Sure.” Sighting Princess Celestia on the far right and staring straight at him, he turned the page and read out its words.

“Tonight we gather in the spirit of conservation. It is not about the conservation of humans, or that of whatever they have left behind, to live in this place called Equestria.

“Rather, it is related to purification, the expansion of our land wiping out everything regarding the human race. Initially, this plan encountered no obstacles, only factors that quickened its pace. Species-exclusive diseases, global warming, and the like. Equestria has always been, with the exception of a few critical events, harmonious and caring, which caused the pony population to increase exponentially.

“However, there has been opposition. The Human Liberation Front had existed since this scheme began. It pushed for a society where humans lived beside ponies, striving for a balance. Although rightly countered countless times, they persevered, even threatening to use force. In the end, they lost in their defence of something which could not remain – but what was their motive?

“We have done our research, and found out they wanted to profit from our extremely fortunate circumstances, without caring about the common ponies. They were not generous to us. They refused to share knowledge and other intelligence so we could benefit.

“This leads us to our theme: the conservation of knowledge. I was originally a human myself, and I brought information about the human race to Equestria. Do you know somepony like me, who was once a different species? If so, talk to them and learn new things. If not, make friends with them. The time ahead of us is bright – it all depends on whether information is shared and used for a common good. Thank you.”

Soon, the hall was filled with the desynchronised claps of everypony who had paid attention. Celestia trotted up just as the keynote speakers were covered by dark shadows.

“I could say that our friends were suitably satisfied,” Twilight admitted. “What's next for tonight?”
Ethan's face scrunched up, ostensibly because of some music leaking from the ballroom:

Scratch and Neon's in the club tonight,
Oh yeah, we're gonna have a good time.
So grab somepony now, don't be shy,
It's our job to make you feel all right.

“Partying,” he finally replied.

Comments

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