[Comedy][Episolary]
This is a follow-up to Inky Scrolls's Be Frank With Me, Luna (2,197 words, [Comedy][Random])
BE BRIEF WITH ME, SPOILERS: Celestia laments that while Twilight faithfully writes to her daily, she never seems to actually respond to any of the letters Celestia sends in return. Luna's patient sleuthing reveals that, despite founding the post office, Celestia has no idea what stamps are. Twilight thus receives hundreds of backlogged letters and parcels at once... all postage due.
Dear Princess Celestia,
In order to meet recent unexpected bills, I have taken a part-time job as a postmare in Ponyville. It really is a wonderful job and I can't believe I didn't try it before. I get to meet almost every pony in town with a smile and their daily collection of letters, even if they are mostly bills and junk mail, some of which is postage due.
One particularly good part of the job is the competition for new stamp design, open to postal employees only. To my surprise, I won this year's contest and it had nothing to do with the Elements of Harmony judging the entries at all. I thought they might be a little upset at my surprise bill too, but they put it all behind them, and in any event the new stamp was released today and I used one of them for this letter. I know how you always were critical about the photographers and portrait painters not capturing your right side, and I think my entry truly captured your essence with some of that 'thinking outside the box' that you encouraged in my long years of training that I spent without ever once being told you had a sister. I think this stamp will really let the ponies of Equestria and beyond (since it is an airmail stamp) know a facet of our leader that only really close friendship reveals, and that they will think of that aspect every time they lick a stamp for a letter. After all, I don't think capturing your right side was really the correct goal, and I think this stamp actually shows the right end.
Sincerely,
Postmare Twilight Sparkle, Ponyville, 65674-4027
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And yet Georg missed the joke when I referred to the stamp being the Equestrian Royal Cake Depository Memorial Issue.
(note: the Royal Cake Depository is an anatomical reference...)
That appears to be the zip code of Humansville?
11498721 Hey, somebody caught that.
11498669 I'm notorious for making jokes nobody catches, and being unable to catch the low, slow, and over the plate ones. I am a Dad, after all.