Chapter 1
Twilight Sparkle had had enough.
She was this close to getting through to Pinkie Pie, to convincing her that Princess Luna wasn't a bad pony, and then Rainbow Dash had to show up and make things worse. And now Pinkie was dashing off like the chicken she was dressed as.
This charade had gone on long enough. She'd deal with Rainbow later. Lighting up her horn, she teleported in front of Pinkie and braced herself.
Pinkie crashed into her, and as they tumbled, Twilight positioned herself so that she was on top of Pinkie.
"She's changed, Pinkie!" Twilight stressed. "She's not evil or scary anymore. And she definitely doesn't wanna gobble you up!"
Pinkie Pie stared at her for a moment, before responding, "Well, duh!"
.......wait. What?
"Huh?"
"I know that! Sheesh, Twilight, I'm almost as big as her, how's she gonna gobble me up?"
"So why do you keep running away and screaming?" Twilight asked, exasperated.
Pinkie smiled wide as she declared, "Sometimes, it's just really fun to be scared!"
Twilight just stared at her friend in shock. She.....had certainly not expected this.
"You mean to tell me...that you've just been pretending to be scared of Luna? That this was just one big joke?"
Pinkie nodded cheerfully. "Mm-hmm. And it looks like Luna's having lots of fun scaring everypony. She's really getting into it! Not bad for her first Nightmare Night!"
Twilight slowly got off Pinkie, trying to comprehend what she just heard. "Pinkie....Luna isn't pretending. She genuinely thinks you're scared of her."
"Pfft. What are you talking about, Twilight?" Pinkie rolled her eyes playfully. "Didn't you see her whole 'RAH I'M PRINCESS LUNA I'M GONNA GET YOU RAAAAHHHH!!!!!!' And that trick with the spiders? That was priceless!"
Twilight felt a rush of anger at Pinkie's ignorance. She pointed down the alley and shouted, "Look at her, Pinkie! Does she look like she's having fun?"
Pinkie, confused, followed the direction Twilight's hoof was pointing. There sat Princess Luna, her back turned and her head bowed. She looked absolutely miserable.
Concerned, Pinkie trotted over to her. "Princess, what's the matter?"
"Come to scream again, little pony?" Luna spat bitterly, standing up but not looking at her. "Do not worry. I shall take leave of this place, where you and the others may never have to see my frightening visage again."
Slowly, she began to walk away.
"Wha...leave? I don't understand.." Pinkie face twisted in confusion. "Weren't you having fun?"
Luna froze.
"Fun? Fun? Surely thou doth jest!"
Luna spun around, and Pinkie saw in horror that she had tears in her eyes. "Dost thou truly believe I enjoy frightening my subjects?! That I revel in the fact that they see me as nothing more than a monster?!"
Pinkie reeled back as if struck. "But....you're not a monster. Everypony knows that. We're just......pretending."
Luna's eyes widened, then narrowed as she sneered. "I see. So they see me not as a demon, but as an object of ridicule. Truly, I feel honored."
Pinkie cringed at the level of hurt and anger the alicorn was radiating. She looked between her and Twilight, who was glaring at her. "No! That's not....I don't...."
"Put yourself in her place, Pinkie." Twilight said, her gaze stern. "How would you feel if everyone was constantly running way from you, constantly reminding you of a single mistake you made?"
Pinkie thought about it, and as she did, her face contorted into an agonized frown. Her back hooves hit the ground and her tail curled around her body.
"I.....I would feel really bad. Like everypony hated me." she whimpered softly.
"Nightmare Moon was one of the worst mistakes I had ever made, Pinkie Pie." Luna said softly. "It cost me a thousand years. With my sister and with my subjects. And it very nearly cost the lives of innocents, nearly destroyed the very country that I swore to protect. I had hoped, that with my cleansing by the Elements of Harmony, that I would be able to start over, to finally form a connection with the ponies of Equestria, as I had longed for all those years ago. I had hoped that I would be able to earn a second chance. But it seems that, once again, I was mistaken."
Luna bowed her elegant head in sadness. Twilight moved to her side and gently placed a hoof on Luna's shoulder. She gazed at Pinkie Pie, clearly expecting her to respond.
Pinkie gazed up at Luna, her pale blue eyes brimming with tears. "I am so sorry, Princess. I wasn't trying to be mean, I swear. Nightmare Night is supposed to be fun. It's fun to be scared. I thought you knew that. I was trying to help you be as scary as you could be, so everypony could have fun!"
Pinkie lowered her head in shame. "But you weren't having fun, were you? We made you think we didn't like you, and that's not true at all! We're glad you're here, Luna! We really are.....but we didn't do a good job showing it."
Pinkie wiped her eyes and looked up at Luna, whose eyes had softened.
"Truly.....thou art glad I'm here?"
Pinkie nodded vigorously. "Of course! You're our friend!"
"F-friend?"
Luna looked to Twilight, who was smiling and nodding. She looked to Pinkie, who was smiling apologetically and holding out her hoof.
Luna considered for a moment, then slowly, she smiled, and toughed her hoof to Pinkie's.
They all went back to town square, where they explained everything. The townsponies, of course, felt terrible for the way they had, albeit unintentionally, treated Luna, and each came up to her and apologized. One colt, Pip, actually hugged Luna, and told her that she was his favorite Princess.
And so, Nightmare Night was restored, and everypony had a good time. Luna even got to scare Rainbow Dash.
Later Twilight sent a letter to Celestia about how she learned to share friendship with others, and how communication is important with others, lest they wind up unintentionally hurting somepony's feelings.
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Not a big change from the show, but a nice little change that wouldn't be out of place in the show. I love it!
Never did like Pinkie and RD in that particular episode.
I wish the end of the episode went like this. This is so satisfying to to read. In fact I'm going to keep this as the true canon ending to the episode.
8517310
That's the problem with Pinkie in the early seasons. I know she doesn't act that way to be cruel - but in a way that makes it worse.
She has a very child-like mentality. She believes that what she considers to be fun is fun for everyone else. That her beliefs are universal truths, and that's simply not the case.
She's gotten better about it, but occasionally she'll backslide into that mentality.....(cough cough rock solid friendship cough cough)
This may seem crazy and evil, but can I make an alternate version of Luna Eclipsed where Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash are shunned, hated and ostracized by everypony in Ponyville for the way she treated Princess Luna in that episode?
8517545
Oh wow... it's like Pinkie embodies millennials...
This. If I were to describe (sum up?) Pinkie Pie in two words, they'd be "she assumes." She assumes any and all newcomer wants her and half the town to break into their new home to set up a surprise party. She assumes everypony knows what she's talking about when dealing with parasprites for the first time even though she's horribly cryptic. She assumes everyone wants to be her friend and no one wants to be left alone.
It's nice to see a version of Luna Eclipsed where Pinkie is not branded a genius as a get-out-of-responsability card. I feel this could have used some more description but well, the most important parts happen in the dialogue anyway.
I found a few mistakes;
She pointed down the alley
She looked away from her, to Twilight
And I have one comment;
"very nearly" because as Princess Twilight Sparkle showed, Nightmare Moon's "reign of terror" lasted ten minutes, tops.
8518031
You can, but I don't think it'd go over very well.
One, it'd be pretty hypocritical of the townsfolk to shun them since they - sans Twilight - did the exact same thing they did.
Two, Pinkie and Rainbow Dash didn't actually mean any harm. It's Nightmare Night, it's only natural they go around playing jokes. The only problem was that they didn't let Luna in on the joke. Heck, RD wasn't even targeting Luna specifically. She was pranking everyone. She just happen to be at the wrong place at the wrong time when Twilight confronted Pinkie.
8518209
Luna is speaking in terms of "what-ifs". What if Twilight and her friends hadn't succeeded. We know from the Season 5 finale that Nightmare Moon would have been a very effecient, if tyrannical, ruler, but she didn't. For all she knew, she could have very well destroyed the world.
I like this rewrite over all the others I've ready because it doesn't absolutely blame any pony for the mistake. Everyone learned a lesson in the end and I feel like that's very much intune to the nature of the episode.
8518361
So it's probably a good idea to play it safe, right?
8518592
There are others? So far I've only seen one re-write of this episode.
8519018
Not this episode in particular. Just rewrites in general seem to play the blame game more than anything else. But this one avoided that and was good!
Truly wonderful work on this!media.tenor.co/images/1c6943c372187ed186416b895f4eb06c/raw
Comments like this is why I think pinkie is the most hated character in the fandom
9109222
No. No honey. That title goes to Cunty Purple.
9109283
True.
8518361
That is very true indeed and just say for some reason Rainbow does deserve some sort of consequence of some sort, she did kinda get that in the end by getting the crap scared out of her by Luna. And like they said all Rainbow did was be in the wrong place at the wrong time. It would’ve been nice to have Pinkie apologize to Luna though in the actual episode, but this does good in showing that.
9109283
Which one? I know at least 3 that can fit that bill
9580949
Starlight.
9581510
Ah, see, My immediate reaction is suri, the starlight, then rarely rarity,
This is much better than the show version.
It's clear what the problem was. The problem was that they have all forgotten that at this point in the show, Luna has returned to her normal self not long ago after the events of the series opening and was trying to figure out and adjust to how things work in Equestria nowadays. Everypony thought Luna was used to things at that point, forgetting that the fact that Luna was on the moon for a 1000 years, and them constantly reminding her of the mistake that cost her to be casted away for that long period of time is just continually rubbing salt in the wounds.
8517545
I noticed that Twilight suffers from the same problem, just not with parties.
When something seems completely logical for Twilight, it must be the same for everyone else. She assumes everyone else around her understands what she does, and this ends up causing a lot of trouble that could’ve easily been avoided. It’s even worse when this flaw is almost never acknowledged in the show, and the ones who do are vilified for it.
The same goes for the rest of the Mane 6. Protagonist-centered morality at its worst.
11532241
The problem is twilight is used to talking with really smart people and because outside her family she didn't have friends she didn't ever really see that people don't get her when she talks smart. And unfortunately outside rainbow barely paying attention when she is explaining something and pinkie is a crazy genius she is just more crazy than genius most of the time which is where a lot of her problems come from but she the only of the element bearers who understands twilight when she talks smart and is able to translate into everyday speech.
8517310
Get in line, for you're not the only one.
This is especially true for me since I am autistic. I would be agitated if someone did me the way Pinkie treated Princess Luna.
Well done.
Although it was short, I do love how this had Pinkie Pie being chewed out for unintentionally hurting Princess Luna's feelings. While Pinkie Pie is a great character, one of her biggest flaws is that what she assumes is the same as what every creature assumes. I mean, look at all of the trouble she put Cranky Doodle through when he moved to Ponyville.
That said, I'm not bashing Pinkie Pie, for she does have some great moments and is a good friend, overall.
I wish that something like this would have appeared in the episode.