Son of Chaos

by twow443

Beginning of Chaotic Love

Chapter 1-Beginning of Chaotic Love

Darkness.....

“Your emotions are not your own......”

“You will use your abilities for my own gain....

“You will accept your role of being my vessel...”

“Because you already are....”

. . .

“No!” I shot up screaming. I was in a cold sweat and was panting. My horn was slightly lit up and I felt like I was sick for a few second. I shook my head and took a few deep breaths. This hadn't been the first nightmare I'd had in the last few months. Hopefully, it would be the last. I rolled out of bed and started to get ready for the day.

In case you don't know who I am, my name is Shade. I'm a changeling. I only found that out about three months ago, among other things. I lived in Canterlot with my mother, Princess Celestia and my aunt, Princess Luna.

Celestia was really my mother, I wasn't kidding about that. And according to her, my father was Discord, the god of chaos. Now considering the fact that he had been frozen in stone 1000 years ago, which included the time in when I was born, I had a hard time believing her. But I asked her about it several times and sensed her emotions. She wasn't lying. What she wouldn't tell me is how the buck I was born then. Whenever I brought it up, she got extremely agitated and I'd leave her alone until she calmed down. She must have been talking to Luna about it, because Luna wouldn't tell me anything either.

I guess that my prodding wasn't helping the situation, because the two princesses were having their own issues to defuse. After I had been released from the hospital three months ago, Celestia had to go and explain why a giant hole had been blasted in the roof of Sugercube Corner. See, the changeling queen Chrysalis and her daughter, Misty(who I had thought was my friend) had ponynapped me and revealed their plan to use my special powers of emotions to rob all of Equestria of their emotions. Then I was supposed to re-distribute them at will. Of course I said no, and it didn't go over well with them. I had escaped from the table they had chained me to and ALMOST escaped, but they caught me. Misty beat the living hay out of me and I had to resort to almost killing myself by shifting into my mother's form. Then after I scared them off, I sent a flare though the roof and passed out. Fortunately, Twilight and Fluttershy saved me and brought me back to Canterlot.

Oops, got a little off topic there. Anyway, Celestia had gone to Ponyville to explain what happened and at the same time, reveal to Equestria who I was. I'm not sure how all of Equestria was notified but they knew it quick. Celestia and Luna were very busy most of the time with talking to dignitaries of other parts of Equestria about me. Also, most ponies in Ponyville and Canterlot took it well, but some didn't. In fact, I was chased though the shopping district in Canterlot by a street gang. I didn't even know there WERE street gangs! I escaped by shifting into my young friend Sweetie Belle and hiding under a wagon. Fun.

I was rather strong for a changeling, but also weak. I had the power to feed off of ANY emotion, not just love. I could also directly steal from a pony's soul that emotion, removing that pony's ability to feel that emotion until I returned it. With that, I could change how that pony acted by adding and removing emotions at will. Or so I've been told. And whenever I shifted, I took on that pony's characteristics. For example, when I shifted into my mother, I felt what she would have felt in that situation. I also could have used her powers to the same extent that she could.

Now I know what you're thinking. Doesn't that make me extremely powerful? Well, yes and no. The thing is, if I don't have a steady stream of emotions, or energy flowing to me, I'll very quickly tire out if I'm using any other ponies abilities. That's why I passed out when I was pretending to be Celestia and almost died. My necklace had saved me from dying instantly.

Now, the last thing I should mention about those 3 months ago is my necklace. I had “bought” two of them about 2 days before I had been ponynapped. They were promise necklaces, to symbolize if two ponies have “promised” themselves to each other. In other words, it shows that two ponies are a couple. I had bought them for me and my now marefriend Fluttershy, wielder of the Element of Kindness. I didn't know what she saw in me to be able to love a weird bug creature, but she did. And her love had saved me from dying that night in the basement of Sugercube Corner.

I guess the problem was that I couldn't accept myself. I had lived my whole life thinking that I was a pony. Then in a blink of an eye, I wasn't. I still wasn't ready to accept who I was, but I hoped that I could soon.

I was rethinking all these thoughts as I got ready for the day. After I had recovered enough, Celestia had resumed my magic lessons with her, and Luna taught me more about hoof combat. I also had a special portal in my room that I used to go to Ponyville. Celestia insisted that I walked around in my disguise when I was there. My disguise was a blue and white pegasus pony I had named “Starlight.” I also used the form I had been enchanted by Celestia to stay in for the past few years, a blue, yellow and green unicorn. Everypony knew who I was in that form though.

After I finished brushing my mane that didn't want to co-operate, and polished my horn, I set out for the dining room. When I walked in, I saw Celestia and Luna already at the table. I took my place between the two sisters.

“Morning Shade.” Celestia said. “Did you sleep well?”

I shook my head. “No, I had another nightmare.”

“If you want, you can stay in Ponyville over the weekend.” Celestia suggested. “I'll be busy. The mayor of Manehatten is coming over to talk with me.”

“Another mayor?” I mumbled over my bowl of oats. “Wonderful.”

“I'm sorry, Shade. I know I said that we would spend some time together this weekend.” Celestia tried to apologize.

The back of my neck flared up like it was on fire and my vision tinted red. I stood up and slammed my hooves on the table. “Then why don't you?! You're the bucking princess! Just tell them to have it another time!”

Celestia looked like she was going to say something, but Luna raised a hoof. Looking in my eyes she said, “Be calm.” Her horn glowed and I felt a cooling sensation wash over me. My vision returned to normal and I sat down again.

Not looking my mother or aunt in the eyes I asked, “It was that stupid mark again, wasn't it?” I didn't look up, but I could sense the affirmation from my aunt.

See the thing was, I had passed out when Chrysalis and Misty had captured me. Apparently during that time, Chrysalis had bitten me on the back of the neck. Nopony had thought that it was a big deal at the time. But, as I became stronger with my powers the mark turned out to be a problem. If I started to show a major emotion, the mark would randomly flare up and I would suddenly feel a rush of that emotion. It could be anger, frustration, joy or even sadness, and would cause me to do things that I wouldn't normally do. Fortunately Luna had found a spell that would counteract the effects of when the mark flared up. She had taught it to Celestia and Twilight, so I wouldn't be in any danger to myself or others. Not to mention the mark HURT. And it was a glaring reminder that I was still in danger. Nopony knew where the changelings had escaped too, and my mother wouldn't let me leave the boundaries of Ponyville or Canterlot without Twilight or themselves with me.

“I'm sorry.” I said. “Have you learned anything about this stupid mark?”

Luna shook her head. “All I know is that only a leader of changelings can do this, but I don't know what it entails yet.”

I looked at Celestia. “So, is it okay if I go to Ponyville? I've been in the castle for a week. Maybe some fresh air will help.”

My mom nodded. “Head over to Twilight's. I think she needs your help with something.”

I stood up, leaving my food on the table and went over to give Celestia a quick hug. I did the same to Luna, then left the room to teleport to Twilight's house.

. . .

Celestia sighed as she watched her son leave. “Luna, were you telling the truth about his marking?”

Luna nodded. “I didn't tell him what I thought because it was just that, a thought. I read that certain marks like that could be a tracking spell.”

“So the spell is connected to the bite?” Celestia asked.

Luna nodded. “It's possible. What have you been telling everypony that comes to ask about Shade?”

“What I can.” Celestia said. “I haven't said anything about-about Discord.”

Luna noticed her sister stutter. “You're right. We don't need to tell them about what happened, but we need to tell Shade.” As Celestia was about to say something, her sister raised a hoof. “Listen to me first, sister. You saw how well it happened the first time he found something out before we could tell him. We can't afford to make that same mistake.”

Celestia started pacing. “I'll have to...figure out all the details. What truly happened. Chrysalis played with my memories while I was pregnant with Shade. I'm not sure what is real about it anymore.”

“Try to figure it out. I will return to working on that mark. The sooner we can remove it, the better.” Luna planned out. “But what do you think Shade should do?”

Celestia turned with a little smile. “He should try to stay out of trouble.”

. . .

Chrysalis slowly walked down the dark palace hall. Walking into the slight darkness of the room on the end, she stopped as she heard a voice. “Hold it.”

“I just wanted to let you know that Shade is no longer in Canterlot.” The changeling queen said.

“Excellent.” the voice said. “And what are the lovely princesses doing?”

“Well, Luna is trying to understand the secret of my claiming mark I put on Shade. And Celestia is other wise occupied talking to dignitaries from other parts of Equestria.”

“Even more wonderful. Gives me plenty of time. Thank you again.” The voice said.

“Oh, and by the way.” Chrysalis asked. “What are you going to do?”

“Me?” The door opened, revealing a large male draconequus. “I'm going to see my son.”

Comments

[Da_Spy]

hurray!

[Hellpony]

Oh, BUCK!

[Da_Spy]

Good story

[Summer Breeze]

So far so good

Continue.

[Baron Von Weirdo]

So this is the story after ''Son of a princess''
u my dear freind deserves moustaches

[OtterMatt]

Okay, I'm'a gonna hit this right after this chapter and before I move on, because there's a few points we need to address.
1) Commas
Commas are used in place of periods at the end of dialogue when the sentence is uncompleted. E.g.,

“What I can.” Celestia said. “I haven't said anything about-about Discord.”

...should be:

“What I can,” Celestia said. “I haven't said anything about-about Discord.”

2) Dashes
En dashes (or n-dashes) are used to hyphenate words, not to show breaks. Em dashes (or m-dashes) are used to show breaks or interruptions in dialogue, thought, or narration. They're named because they're the same length as an "n" and "m", respectively. To do an em dash, you hold Alt, type 0151 on the keypad, and release Alt. You get —. It's a pain in the ass, which is why I had a friend write a script for me that replaces the tilde (shift+`) with an em dash instead. I'll let you have a copy if you want. Soooooo, that sentence gets adjusted again, and it now reads as:

“What I can,” Celestia said. “I haven't said anything about—about Discord.”

Please note that there are no spaces in front of or after an emdash, much like the hyphen or en dash.

3) INFODUMPS
If there's one overarching problem with this story, that's it. Pretty much everything else is done rather well. I think you've managed to avoid writing a Sue variant, despite ticking all the boxes, so well done there. Ye gods, though, is his backstory shoveled at the reader's face.
"Show, Don't Tell" has some bearing here. Yes, there's a certain amount of information that you need to outline in narration rather than in dialogue or action, but you really need to limit that. I'd highly recommend either shifting much of the infodump to dialogue, internal thoughts, or something else, but it really needs to change things up. If you need some coaching on that, PM me, I'm pretty easy to get a hold of.

After all that, you get a laurel, and a hearty handshake—I mean, a thumbs-up and a track on this story. (PS, see how I used dashes in that last sentence? Eh, eh? )

-OtterMatt: TWE's Resident Master of Music
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[SHRIK3]

Shit is about to hit the fan