The story was long. It was heartbreaking.
Above all else though? It made me angry.
It was an anger that grew as I brought Doohickey and Music Box along for the return trip via Chewie.
While my manticore brother may not have understood the full context of the story, he got the gist. His rage fueled my own and he made double time.
I prayed that Applejack hadn't let her stubborn pride get the best of her... But I was wrong as we came in for a landing near the cider stand by Sweet Apple Acres.
The crowd of ponies there was watching in shock as Flim and Flam gloated loudly about their victory to the Apple family, the Element holders included.
"A deal's a deal, Lady Applejack!" Flam laughed from atop the Super Squeezy Whatever 6000. "The farm is ours! Your titles are ours!"
I hopped off Chewie's back, and stormed through the crowd of ponies. Dash spotted me immediately, and made to intercept. She probably guessed at my intentions and was trying to hold me back.
She didn't make it.
Flam looked up at me with a smug grin as I towered over him.
"Well well! Hello Mister Human!" He said cheerfully. "Seems you're a bit late-"
I slugged him right in his stupid face, enjoying the feel of his teeth violently leaving his mouth. The unicorn fell back in shock and pain, as Flim gasped.
"ASSAULT!" He bellowed as I seized him by his stupid vest. "ASSAULT-GACK!"
I slammed the unicorn's head into the ground and would have stomped his skull flat if Twilight, Big Macintosh and Dash hadn't grabbed me and pulled me back.
Flim struggled up to his hooves and glared at me as Flam whimpered on the ground.
"Mayor Mare!" He bellowed to the shocked politician in the crowd, "arrest this ape! He's mad! He's violent-!"
"Mayor Mare," I stated, as calmly as I could while Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy joined in holding me back, "these stallions are conartists, liars, thieves and guilty of manslaughter! Or pony slaughter! Place them under arrest!"
"Those are serious charges, Ser Shepherd," the Mayor spoke, as the crowd murmured and gasped. "Have you any proof?"
"Plenty," I snarled. "Mister Doohickey!"
Doohickey trotted up, Music Box alongside in a cloak. The old unicorn glared at his sons. His sons stared back in slowly dawning recognition and horror.
"Hello colts," Doohickey stated, his cold rage and disappointment radiating like the sun, "remember me?"
"Oh buck," Flam whimpered through his broken teeth.
Doohickey trotted up in front of the crowd, Music Box pressed tight against his side. The old unicorn looked around at his audience, gathering his courage. Finally, he began to speak
"I am Doohickey, an engineer of Bitspur," he began. "My wife Blueberry Malt died in foal birth, and I raised my sons-Flim and Flam-on my own. I was busy, working for the railroad and on my own projects. I wanted to give my colts the best life I could, so I worked. Constantly. Everything I did, I did for them. To create inventions that would make life better for everypony."
He sucked in a deep breath, shuddering just a bit in shame and grief, before he continued.
"I failed," he said. "I didn't teach them anything I should have. I neglected them. They learned only what they needed to in order to con and deceive ponies into giving them what they wanted. I did what I could, but I was blind to their true natures. I thought they would grow up. I was wrong."
He looked at everybody, before his eyes locked onto his sons. Flam was more composed while Flim glared back.
"I went out of the house to get supplies. I came back just in time to hear an argument between my colts and a mare. Summer Breeze," he growled, and Flim winced.
"They had left her with foal. She had brought the foal and demanded Flim marry her. He refused. There was a scuffle..." he closed his eyes. "An explosion... I was knocked out. When I came to, my house was a burning wreck. All my inventions and money were gone. And Summer Breeze was dead... Her body wrapped around her mortally wounded foal!"
Gasps and cries left the crowd, as more anger was directed at the twin brothers. Twilight let me go, as did my other friends. Doohickey sucked in another breath.
"I did what I could for her. But my money was gone. The local townsponies blamed me for my sons' misdeeds. I took a job at the junkyard and did everything I could for my grandfoal... My Music Box."
Doohickey looked down at Music Box. The filly gulped, sniffled... Then pulled her cloak down. Many ponies gasped in horror and shock. Twilight glared at the twins. Applejack and her family seethed.
Flam clopped his front hooves together sarcastically, even as Flim cringed.
"A convincing story, you senile stallion," Flam spoke, "a lot of waterworks-but no evidence! Meanwhile, this Knight of Equestria assaulted my brother and I on our property! So get out or we put you out!"
I looked to Doohickey. He seemed... Not calm, but determined. He raised his eyebrows as he looked over the cider presser.
"If I'm making it up, then tell me," Doohickey said calmly, "when is the last time you cleared the filter for the Automatic Cider Press 6000?"
Flam laughed mockingly, as did Flim. He'd gotten his courage back up.
"Every day, you crazy old stallion!" Flim said mockingly.
Doohicky hummed. He trotted up to the side of the device, and examined it closely. Music Box, feeling vulnerable, got up close to me. I patted her head comfortingly. Flam and Flim kept up their smiles, but there was some strain in them.
"Ah. The secondary filter, yes," Doohickey said with a nod. "You have kept that one clean. But what about the primary?"
"...Primary?" Both twins asked.
Doohickey tapped the side of the barrel, and a section slid out. It was at one point a complex grid filter... But now it was ripped, torn, and covered in bacteria. It stank to high heaven, and many ponies in the crowd gasped.
"Congratulations," Doohickey stated, "you may have given every pony here dysentery."
Much retching, screaming and throwing of cider mugs ensued. Flim and Flam looked at eachother.
Applejack glared hot death at them.
"Got an explanation, partners? Afore we beat ya senseless?"
Flam smiled nervously.
"Ah... As a matter of fact!"
Flim threw down a smoke bomb, enveloping the crowd in smoke. Chewie swooped down from overhead and pounced on the twins, roaring in their faces. Both unicorns screamed.
"Rainbow Dash! As our resident weather officer," the Mayor bellowed, " you are deputized! Put those stallions under arrest!"
The Pegasus, finished emptying her stomach, glared hot death at the Flim Flam Brothers while grinning widely in her rage.
"With pleasure," she hissed. The brothers screamed louder.
I grinned over at my partner, and the manticore grinned back. I squeezed little Music Box, and she actually managed a small smile.
Doohickey nodded and smiled sadly at me. He shook his head and sighed.
"Least I did something right in my life," he admitted.
"Better late than never," I replied.
To the jailhouse with these scum.
Nope.
So i was right criminal. Scum of the lowest order.
Hope the one brother gets a lifetime sentance...
"Wait, you can do that? I can do that?"
"Just arrest them, Miss Dash."
In any case, an interesting take on the brothers. Despicable and on the harsher side for them, but still within the realm of believability.
great chapters, been saving these up for some reading!
keep it up!
Music Box is sad and hurt! Someone toss a Pinkie at her!
Either that should be revised or he resorted to paying a necromancer at some point.
10914152
She was wounded to the point that only cybernetics could keep her alive. That's pretty close to mortally wounded in my mind.
Well I was wrong. They weren't committing crimes because of poverty, they're just scum. I hear the moon has a great criminal rehabilitation program.
10914165
If there is a slightly-mad pony scientist/engineer who deserves a Royal stipend in research for life support gear and cybernetics to benefit maimed guardponies and victims of wildlife or accidents that mauls them, it is that poor old stallion.
Thanks for the release, and hoping to hear more from you!
I’ve amended what I said last chapter about these two.
And again: F*CK FLIM AND FLAM!!! May they get the same treatment in Tartarus that Hitler gets in “Little Nicky”!
...BURN THEM!!
*ignites his flamer*
Some things don't deserve a chance at redemption.
They were selling "miracle medicines", which is on itself the lowest of the low that you can do legally. Assassins are morally better than that.
10914537
Yeah, at least they're upfront about what they're really doing.
If we are technically they still have won and should be given the farm.
The bet was about the most barrels of cider, not good cider or drinkable cider, just cider. Like in the show they made more, they won.
It might not be a legally binding bet, as it was never written down, but a bet of honor would weight for the Apples heavier anyways.
An eternal stain on the image of the Element of Honesty.
10914828
"Wine that has spoiled is vinegar, not wine."
And in the show they lost precisely because their cider was shit.
Flim and Flam are scheisters, scoundrels, but I wouldn’t call them monsters. They had some redeeming qualities.
Not here though.
Fry ‘em.
Also these two have been through enough, wonder if a knight could use a machinist and a steampunk filly?
10915537
The bet was about cider, not good cider, they made bad cider, but cider, and more then the Apples.
10914184
The moon would be too nice for those two, plus I can easily see Luna not wanting them of all ponies to one day be able to claim that they were the first “real” ponies to set hoof on it. Barring this version of Equestria having a prison system that actually works, I guess Tartarus it is (because let’s face it, just banishing them from it would simply mean inflicting them on an unprepared outside world and thus be criminally irresponsible in its own right)...
im hopin Doohickey moves to ponyvill and sheperd more or less adopts music box
10916104
Committing a crime to make your "cider" invalidates any bet anyway.
And yes, selling poisoned cider is a crime. A case of the trots is a good ending, that kind of contamination can lead to excessively high methanol content, which is the "make you go blind or kill you" alcohol content versus the "get drunk and sleep it off" alcohol content. Since Flim/Flam had no idea there was all that going on in the filtration system, they absolutely had tainted their product with stuff nobody short of a kirin or dragon would find healthy,
😭❤❤❤
10919354
In this case, reckless endangerment. Voluntary
manponyslaughter if anybody died. (Mass) murder if it's on purpose, which obviously isn't true in this case but included for the sake of completeness.This is best thing since slice bread, looking forward to reading more!
10916104
Cider is drinkable, at the very least, whether good or bad.
What those two made in the show was sewer water mixed with apple juice, at best, when they overclocked their machine.
Prison is to good for them...
10914828
If we are being technical, no, they shouldn't be given the farm. The bet was souly for the right to be the only ones allowed to sell cider in ponyvile. Not for the farm itself. They tried to change the bet after they had already "won".
Well written.
Hope the are in for life...
Unfortunately the Flim & Flam still did a lot of lasting damage, but a life sentence under observed work might help pay it back. Rockfarm or a mine etc.
The second worst Flum and Flam story outcome I read
Since the worst killed their entire world beyond rescue.