Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
Caramel breathed in and out... in and out... in and out. He closed his eyes, gulped, and resumed nuzzling the silk surface of an adorable blouse hanging from the rack of an elegant department store.
"You good?" Rainbow asked, fidgeting in the middle of the shopping aisle.
"I'm... I-I'm getting there," Caramel said, eyelids fluttering shut. "Just a few seconds more..."
Rainbow sighed through a tired smile. "Very well..."
"One Maressissippii... Two Maressissippii... Three Maressissippi..." At last, Caramel breathed evenly. "Okay..." He leaned back into the aisle, standing beside Rainbow Dash with a calm breath. "I think I'm good now."
"You're not gonna freak out any longer over the fact that we're a gazillion feet above sea level?"
"Grkkk!" Caramel winced, glaring out the store entrance to where a grand, circular balcony looked out onto the gray-and-blue skylight of Upper Las Pegasus. "Don't rub it in!"
"Heeheehee..." Rainbow chortled. "I'm sorry, girl. Just... I've never seen a pony so worked up over heights."
"I'm an earth pony, Rainbow Dash," Caramel groaned. "An earth pony." With a slight shudder, he followed the pegasus out of the shop and onto the circular balcony. A cool wind blew at their manes from the high altitude air. Ponies—tourists from all trots of life strolled leisurely along the outer platform, leaning against the railing and enjoying the sights of the lower city sprawled out below. Outdoorsfood vendors and photograph spots attracted visitors who congregated in sporadic bunches. Meanwhile, along the inner circle of the platform, shops and restaurants attracted even more patrons. "The highest I've ever been was a weekend I spent trying to repair the farm's windmill... and I couldn't sleep afterwards for days."
"Wow. That just... blows my mind, y'know?" Rainbow remarked. "That there are ponies who've actually not experienced flight... especially on a daily basis."
"Most of us are virtual groundhogs." Caramel gulped. "Only a few can hope to be as awesome and... casual about lifting off the ground as you, Rainbow."
"Maybe I could give you a lift around Ponyville sometime," Rainbow said in a pleasant tone. "Help you lose your fear."
"Erm... thanks but no thanks."
Rainbow raised an eyebrow. "You'll be headed to Canterlot Mountain for your operation, right? Might as well get used to heights while you still can."
"Eheh..." Caramel blushed slightly. "Good point."
"Hey!" Lyra growled from a distance. She waved from where she stood next to Vinyl and Bon Bon. "If you two girlfriends are done doing each other's make up, we've got some snazzy thrillrides to vomit over! So stop making out and move your tails!"
"Buy a shirt and then keep it on!" Rainbow hollered back. "We'll be there when we'll be there! Yeesh!"
Caramel cleared his throat. "Lyra... certainly has a wild imagination."
"Huh? Oh, right." Rainbow inhaled. "Look, Caramel, in all seriousness—"
"Pffft..." He rolled his eyes. "She was joking, Rainbow."
"Well, obviously. I just want you to know—"
"You're not attracted to ponies that look like stallions on the outside. That's fine," Caramel exhaled.
"It's... not that." Rainbow cleared her throat. "You're super cute and awesome to be with. Just... y'know... not my type. 'Cute and bashful' is sooooooo Fluttershy." She suppressed a cough. "And... uhhhh... I've been there. Well... almost been there. And I've since learned that I prefer a mare who's... not quite so soft."
Caramel giggled.
Rainbow raised an eyebrow.
"Just... just an amusing thought..." Caramel smirked. "What if—after the magical sessions are over with—I turn out to be quite the catch, eh, Rainbow?" He winked.
"Could you bench press me with just your tail muscles?"
Caramel binked. "Is that what you dig?"
"Heh... I'm just joshin' ya." Rainbow yawned into the breezy winds. "Even if you turn out to be a smoking hot babe, you'll always be my cool, compassionate, adorable drinking buddy. I'm glad to be acquainted, flat muzzle or curved."
"Heeeee... I'd expect no less, Rainbow Dash." Caramel smiled. "Just to be accepted for who I am."
"But if they roll you out of there as an athletic, muscular, flank-kicking farm mare..." Rainbow Dash whistled, coiling her wings tightly by her side. "I dunno, girl. Somepony page Sigmane Freud."
"I doubt that'll happen," the stallion said with a laugh. "It's not exactly my type."
"Heh... good point."
"And who knows? Maybe tonight we'll find you a mare who is your type." Caramel winked. "Or two."
"Mrmmmfff..." Rainbow stared out at the lofty blue sky. "...we'll see. Depends on how plastered this mare is before bench-pressing..."
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aaand Applejack mysteriously shows up in Las Pegasus and bumps into Rainbow's group. They get drunk and next thing you know they wake up married.
Now that I'm caught up, it's nice to read a little slice of this story every day. It's like escaping to another world for a few minutes. A fuzzy vacation world.
7089520
Or Applejack and Stu show up to elope.
7089612
Then under Donkey's advice, Rainbow Dash runs into the wedding shouting "I object!"
Carameldashery?
...I think I'd be cool with that.
Somehow I don't think Rainbow's gonna get over her little crush that easily. I mean . . . it's been what? Nine hundred chapters? That's not exactly a crush you can just get over in a day or two.
7089751
I for one wouldn't be averse to Rainbow getting over Applejack. Appledash isn't exactly my favorite ship which begs the question of why I read this entire story.
7089784 I wouldn't mind a little detour either. Might actually be fun to watch unfold Rainbow, however, has gone to such great lengths for Applejack (whether AJ knows it or not) that I imagine it'd take a lot to have Rainbow get over it. That being said, anything is possible, especially in this story.
7089784 You are not alone, it's not my favorite ship either and yet I'm still here.
7089612 Well wouldn't that be a buzzkill. Seriously, it probably WILL be Caramel and Rainbow getting drunk and end up marrying each other.
Uh oh.
7089784
7089857
I'm pretty meh over Appledash myself.
Really, I'm reading this because it's Skirts, it's funny, and it's awesome.
Shipping is a side bonus, even if so far the ships mentioned have either been meh, or ones I loathe, like Twixie.
7089784
7089857
7090114
When I think "favorite ships", those are the ones that I enjoy thinking about the most in my head, which are Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, and Twilight and Pinkie Pie (hey, opposites attract). But that really has no bearing on what ships I enjoy reading. That's all up to the writer, so I really have no least favorite ships. Because Applejack is my least favorite mane six, I never think about the idea of Twilight and her together, and plus the idea just doesn't sound interesting in my head, but I've read multiple TwiJack stories I've liked, certainly more than Twinkie (and my favorite fan fic is Yours Truly, which heavily features TwiJack). Although I don't write, the ship that sounded hardest to write to me was Raripie, but I've also read multiple Raripie stories I liked. I found Flash as bland as everyone else did in Equestria Girls, but I really like Flash and Twilight's relationship in Persona EG. So, execution is everything I guess. That's what's cool about shipping. You can shove any two characters together and make it work if you've got the skill for it.
This was also a nice talk to have.
7089784 I don't even like Applejack, let alone ship her with Rainbow Dash. I'll usually pass over any Applejack-centric stories because her character doesn't appeal to me in the slightest. WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE
Still, it would be quite a cop-out if Rainbow Dash actually didn't get with Applejack by the end of this story, but in the meantime? Yes. Ship Rainbow with everybody and everything.
I don't think you can have tail muscles....right? Well, maybe Bulk Biceps...
The title just reminded me of an old Ron White joke
Hey, look at that. Rainbow seems really relaxed at the moment because someone Is simply talking to her, not at her.
7089526 Until he leaves you on a cliffhanger.
Speaking of cliffhangers, I'm going to leave now. Right about now is a perfect time for cliffhangers.
Caradashery?