Clara Devita was a Pokémon coordinator that was recognized throughout the world as a prodigy in the art. It only took her several years to achieve goals that most coordinators could only dream of. Many of them viewed her as an idol where she represented the coming new age of Pokémon coordination. However, Clara had a secret. A secret so great that not only would it brand her a criminal, but it would also destroy her dream.
Prepared to spend the rest of her life hiding her secret from society's scrutinizing eyes, Clara continued to live her life with the constant fear of being caught, that is until she and her team are whisked away to a new world by the all powerful Arceus. There, Clara will have to face new challenges in her new much more plush body, in order to keep doing what she loves best.
Please leave a like if you favorite ^^
A crossover with A New World, a New Way
Well, for a first fic, you don't fall in the same trap holes as others new writers.
I mean come on! Look down there! *points a hole filled with people struggling to get up*
You have large chapters, a decent description with a quality of english that is above average (from what I've seen).
Might read later :3
You know what? This isn't bad at all(makes me wonder about the amount of dislikes you got off the bat). The one thing I'd advise you for is watch out for the proper nouns like names. They always need to be capitalized and it looks like you've missed quite a few there. Otherwise I'd say you've got a good idea and I wish you luck on your story.
5084939 Thank you. I talked with Zeus earlier (The author of "A New World, a New Way") about the dislikes, and apparently they were just trolls that go around spamming dislikes. Which is obvious since I got all the dislikes within the first thirty seconds of releasing this story.
It is very frustrating because those troll's dislikes deter other people from reading the story.
Nice start and interesting perspective, glad to see a new and peaceful (at least as for now) story.
Welcome to Equss!
5085093 Thank you!
I would also like to ask the people who have favorited this story to please press the like button. I want go get rid of those nasty troll dislikes in order to give this story a chance ^^
5085111 The irony! I am story number seven on NW, and I am the seventh like here, yohohoho!
BTW, would you like a merc?
I normally offer them latter on, but something tells me your story will be interesting.
Haters gonna hate, but I cant see a reason why.
The story has charm and it's another female mc. Woot!
And I am really liking how she is the first human to actually question staying a pokemon this early on.
Thank you guys.
chapter 2 is under construction right now. I plan to update this a couple times a week at minimum. ^^
I like this so far, keep it up.
Nothing's really wrong with the prolouge from what I see except this.
The order of the words is off for this sentence.
5085997 fixed
I like this.
Pretty good so far!
I don't think you deserve those dislikes
5085997 "Then use dragon claw Altaria, to get rid of those rocks!"
you forgot the comma Robomac. Not only is it grammatical, it's also slightly better to read with a pause.
5086854 I copy and pasted the original wording directly from the story. I didn't forget the comma; it wasn't there from the start.
This is why I need an editor
I am putting this as favourite for now, because my watch later list is overfilled. I'll rate if after few new chapters.
Wanted to let you guys know that the next chapter is coming along nicely. Expect it either tomorrow or Saturday
P.S. If you didn't already hear, I plan on being an active writer by updating this story a couple times a week.
I'm sorry, but this story, it's just strange. If a human and a Umbreon had a relationship... ugh
5090533 but she's not a human anymore
5091032 No more implied sex scenes, please.
dlrjournal.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/feeling_sick.jpg
5091032 Yeah, but... Since this is your first story, good job anyway.
5092666 Really? I thought they added character.
you have earned a favorite, I dont normally favorite pokemon stories so GOOD job! you also earn a thumbs up
5093257 Thank you so much!
I am also pleased to tell you guys that the next chapter is almost done.
5090533 What Scarlet said, and also, the decriminalization of pokephilia when it's actual love is a core element of this entire series. I would probably be a bit more freaked out if I knew someone who was intimate with an Arcanine-
A.T.- I resent that!
I jest, I jest. Seriously tho, not the worst.
5090533 If pokemon are as fully sentient as a human, then it's about the same thing as two lovers of different races in any other fantasy setting like say a Minotar and a Pony in MLP. At least that's how I look at it.
5093564 I suppose you're right. I'm not trying to be mean to the author, but this just isn't the type of story I like. Everyone dislikes what they dislike, everyone likes what they like.
5093587 I can respect that.
5093587 You can make it up to me by liking the story
lol
I need more of this.
I'm following this story and I hope you continue it soon. The characters are so cute.
5094261 All most done with the next chapter :P
5094150 XD
5092666 added the sex tag just for you.
5094625 hk94.com/hk/uploadgal/gallery/album_209/gallery_1_209_1200631.gif
5090533 Could be worse
"Dirty Deeds done with Sheep"
5094974
5095395 Seriously. Rarely do I EVER read any story with the sex tag on it.
5090533 If you find a human and an Umbreon strange, then dont read stories in this 'verse!
5092666
if you don't like 'implied sex scenes' then really, dont read stories in this 'verse, because alot of the ones I have read contain Pokemon/Human relationships, and a nice number of them also have the thing you hate in this fic 
Gawd, I hate Idiots like them
Now, to some 'good' things, Loving this story so far Scarletmenace and loving the relationship between Clara and Saul so far. I shall be watching and waiting
*hides in the barn Clara and Saul slept in*
Giggity
Are you seriously watching an Umbreon and a Sylveon get it on? shaaame
oh hush Molly you horny Mawile
5095715 Idiot? S'cuse me? Did I imply that this fic sucked? I don't need some self-righteous jackhole insulting me for no reason. Furthermore, he did that to 'troll' me and I explained why I joke-replied with the gif.
5095953 dude... I posted that BEFORE I saw your reply...
dont get all testy. I honestly hate people who rag on about one single tag on an otherwise great story
5095964 Hm. Then ignore the comment. I also never judge something by a tag. I simply stated that I avoid any sexual stories.
5096001 i apologize about my comment btw. I don't really reload pages before I comment, so i run into a few misunderstandings every now and again
5096034 I reply like that because I've grown tired of being stepped on. It only works online...My spoken tongue isn't as adept as my written tongue.
5095658 I am glad that you enjoy my story. ^^
5096303 i871.photobucket.com/albums/ab277/angeloney/troll-i-lied-light-l.png
5096385 you crack me up
5096515 phoenixrealestateguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/blogimagesearth-20fissure.png
i260.photobucket.com/albums/ii15/bwb3609/MrBurns.jpg
For having no editor, you did swell. Only errors I really saw at a glance were typos, cloned word syndrome (where you type a word twice on accident, etc.), and other small things that are typical of solo writing. Fortunately, these errors aren't completely catastrophic to a story, unlike many other errors fandom writers tend to make whether it be from inexperience or a plain lack of caring. Just look at any < mediocre story, and you'll know what I refer to.
Only thing I can really knock you on is sentence variation/detail and comma usage, as well as the always-present typos. The first one is basically knowing how much detail/description an action in the story requires (there's a lot more to it than just that, but I think of it as the "colorfulness" and "theme" of a single sentence), the second one is easily fixed with experience and/or having an editor read through, and the third one is something everyone has an editor for. If you want me to expand on anything, just yell at me-- I'm usually derping around on the comment sections because I'm too lazy to write something myself or too much of a perfectionist to release anything to the hungry masses. Likewise, if you need me to pre-read anything, I'm usually on during the weekends and would have no issue looking through words for mechanical issues.
5086854
Why not use two commas to separate the subject?
"Then use dragon claw, Altaria, to get rid of those rocks!"
Or just remove the issue (because I'm a bit iffy about the double commas) by:
"Then use dragon claw to get rid of those rocks, Altaria!"