But Twi, You Don't Understand, it's...
Buck! Buck, buck, buck, BUCK!! Of all things, of all mother bucking things, how could I have left them in the open in my room?! I can't let Twilight see them because if she does, she will...NO! I just gotta get back to the castle in time!
Hey, Eric "Buggie" Reed here and right now I just couldn't believe myself! I left something in my room in Princess Twilight Sparkle's "tree-castle" (though I just say "castle") that I'm normally extra-extra-extra-extra-careful to keep hidden from Twilight when I'm in the mood for...them.
Twilight, one of my two "Equestrian big sisters", sometimes goes in my room when I'm not there. While she doesn't do it often, it's typically when her OCD's in full force, and she'd feel like cleaning or organizing whatever she can find. I'm eighteen so I hate to admit it, but I'm not exactly Mr. Clean and I'm a bit lazy about cleaning, so I never minded her wanting to clean my room. It would save me from needing to do it.
But because Twi might go in my room, I had to return ASAP to get rid or hide them. I couldn't let my big sister see those, or she'll lose it and yell her head off!
I sprinted like crazy while squinting my eyes from the wind blowing in my face, and held on tight to my white hat with a design of my friends' Cutie Marks so it wouldn't fly off my head. As I did, I weaved by one pony after another on the streets of Ponyville.
"Hey there, Eric. Why are you running?"
"Sorry, can't talk, Miss Cheerilee!"
"Eric? Ya tryin' to train for the next--"
"Can't talk, Applejack, I gotta get to Twilight's castle!"
"Hi, Eric! What are you--"
"Sorry, Sweetie Belle, I need to do something!"
Great. Everypony wanted to talk to me on the day I couldn't talk. It felt mean to brush them off, but...other things were on my mind! Like what a certain purple Alicorn might do if I don't make it to my room in time. As the image of Twilight's purple and blue castle got bigger and bigger, it felt like I sprinted even faster.
I finally arrived and busted through its yellow double-doors and while my chest was burning, I couldn't stop, not yet. I forced my legs that now felt like Jello down the lobby, up the stairs two steps at a time, and through the hallways. Soon, I eyed my still-closed brown bedroom door; I made it! And Twilight's nowhere in sight! But walking by the door was my favorite Unicorn and other "Equestrian big sister", Starlight Glimmer.
"Hey, Buggie. Why are you in such a hurry?"
The good news is that I wasn't worried about "Starie" going in my room and see them. After I took five seconds to fall to one knee and pant -- Starlight probably would have joked about me "proposing" if she knew how humans proposed in my old world -- I asked, "Starie, where's *pant* Twi? Has she been in my room?"
"No, I don't think so."
Hearing that, I jumped in the air while giving a cheer, and I felt a big 'ol wave of relief flow through me! "Yes! If she hasn't, I have time to--"
Spike, my "Equestrian little brother" peeked his head and came out from a different brown door that was beside my door. "Hey, Eric? I thought I heard somepony, er, someone running. Where's the fire?"
"It'll be in Twilight's throat from yelling if I don't get them out my room!"
Spike asked, "Why? What's wrong?"
"Well, it's--"
Cheerful humming and hoofsteps came from behind me and my eyes got big. My heart skipped a beat, and then another beat. I knew who it was, and I thought, Oh, no! Not her!
It was the pony I hoped wouldn't show up yet. I spun around to see Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship herself, trotting down the hall towards me while levitating a mirror in pink magic in front of her. It was roughly one-and-a-half feet wide and three feet long.
"Oh, hey, Buggie, what do you think about this new mirror I got for you?"
The mirror really surprised me since Twilight didn't say anything about getting me a new one, so I actually forgot why I hurried back to the castle. "Oh, that mirror's for me? What made you get it?"
"I thought you might like a larger mirror in your room to hang pictures of us around, like how Starlight does with her room's mirror. And I already checked to make sure it'll fit."
Starlight giggled and said, "Yeah, she does that, Buggie, but I'm sure you know that."
"Yep, she did the measurements for the mirror yesterday, and it was why I had you come out to 'taste test' some sandwiches I made."
"Oh, so that's why you had me do all that for those four 'brand new' sandwiches you made!" I chuckled and shook my head at how I didn't pick up something was up when Spike begged me to test his "new" sandwiches. I turned to face Twilight with a smile. "And thanks, Twi, and I like it. You didn't have to do this for me."
"Well, too bad because I did, and I'm glad you like it! In fact, how about we go in your room and--"
Uh-oh. I remembered why I was panicking! As Twilight walked towards my door while still levitating the mirror, I jumped in front of it to cut her off and leaned my back against it. "No, no, no! Don't go in my room!"
Twilight stared at me, and her cheerful smile turned into a confused frown. "Why? What's wrong?"
"Oh, uh, there's something in there that's, uh..."
"Wait, you're sweating like you ran back to the castle in a panic or something." Taking a closer look at my face, Twilight noticed the big nervous grin I had. "And you look like you're afraid of what I might do if I go in."
"Uh, w-well, I guess y-you could say that but, Twi, it's n-not what you--"
As I was busy stuttering, Twilight, I guess worried that I was scared of her doing something bad to me if she saw what it was I didn't want her to see, entered "big sister" mode. With an extra-friendly smile on her face, she laid the mirror against the wall of the hallway, then she gently sat a hoof on my shoulder, which made me shut up.
"Buggie, it's me, big sis Twilight, remember? You know how I always tell you that you can tell me anything, and you remember how I promised to never try to hurt you no matter what, right?"
"I remember, big sis, b-but they--"
"You trust me, right, little bro?"
"Oh, y-yeah, I trust you, b-but you don't--"
Scratch "big sister" mode: Twilight upgraded it to the rarer "Motherly big sister" mode, and she moved the edge of one of her wings over my mouth to quiet me. While looking me in the eyes, in a motherly voice, Twilight assured, "Then let's go in your room, together. And I promise that no matter what's in there, I won't get mad, and I will definitely not use my magic on you. So don't be scared of me, okay?"
I knew I had no choice. Not with Twilight pouring on the kindness to give Fluttershy a run for her bits to be the Element of Kindness. Plus, if I kept resisting, I'd run the risk of hurting Twilight's feelings. I nodded my head, and she moved both her hoof and edge of her wing off me.
"Thank you, little bro. Now, let's see what you're so afraid of me finding."
I moved to unblock the door, and Twilight gently wrapped the wing she used to quiet me around my back, with just as gentle a smile, still trying to assure me it's all right. Then, Twi's horn glowed as pink magic pushed open my bedroom door, and she and I walked in. Despite the Princess of Assurance saying we'll go together, I went in first since the doorway wouldn't fit both of us going in at the same time. However, Twilight was behind me with her wing still around my back, and the size of those wings meant it covered just over half of my back.
Once in, Twi walked up to my left to stand beside me and turned her head back and forth to see what I tried to hide from her. I closed my eyes, and thought, Eric, brace yourself for the yelling and screaming.
"Wait, there's nothing so bad in here. In fact, is this one of your jok-- *GASP*" Twilight finally spotted what I tried to keep her from seeing. Her mouth dropped and her eyes grew twice their normal size!
"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!"
Since she stood right beside me to my left, Twilight's ear-piercing screaming killed my eardrums and all I could do was tightly place a hand on the ear closest to her! I couldn't cover my other ear because my right arm was pinned in the now-tight grip of the wing Twilight still had wrapped around me.
One second of screaming in place, Twilight spun around fast and her wing forced me to spin in place. As I yelled while spinning, a still-screaming Twilight ran out of my room, flew down the hallway in an audible zip, and created a gust of wind from her wings! Starlight and Spike grimaced from her screaming, and Starlight's mane flapped from the "wind" Twilight's wings created. Somehow, I noticed all that as I still spun in circles, and even more somehow, Twilight's voice didn't break the mirror she got me. Maybe she made it more durable with her magic or something?
After I stopped spinning, I fell to my knees and heaved in a trash can by my door, and the ringing in my ears didn't exactly help me feel better. Starlight, still outside my doorway, turned her head to where the Princess of Fleeing flew away in. "Wow, Eric, what is in that room?! I've never seen Twilight act like that before!"
"Yeah, even for Twilight, that was a bad freak-out!"
I was too busy heaving to answer, and Spike walked through the doorway to my room to pat me on the back. But Starlight, while grimacing from what I was...doing, decided to answer her own question and peeked in my room.
"What's so scary in here? The only thing I see different is the silver plate on the drawer by the wall. I mean, it has four extra-cheesy quesadillas on it. And there's some cheese and salsa spilled out beside it so it looks even more 'cheesy' and 'saucy'. But I don't get why she acted like that."
Well, I tried to warn her. I knew how scared Twilight Sparkle is of quesadillas and that she'd freak-out severely if she saw them, and I really didn't want my big sister to go though that. However, it's not smart to approach a freaking-out Alicorn unless you have to. Thus, after I got done puking, instead of suggesting to calm down Twilight, I asked, "Well, Starie, Spike, since you two are here, you want to help me hang the mirror the Princess of Screaming got for me?"
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Gud.
Definitely your funniest story thus far
9725548
thanks!
Man, you're writing stories left and right
9725665
I wouldn't quite say that. This was a story I started working on around 3 weeks ago and I just finished it around the same time as the other one.
Ha-Ha!!! That was not what I was expecting! Nice work!
9725684
Thanks!
But what if I want to "go in" Twilight?
9725748
I would think twice if it's this Twilight. You might get a left hook from Eric if you do because he can be protective of Twilight when it does to guys getting...ideas.
9725759
I mean, the title's warning me not to "go in" Twilight, so I had to express my defiance.
9725778
Until you mentioned it. I didn't even think the title could be looked at like that. Maybe I should've added a comma before "Twilight" in the title. In fact, I think I will
9725781
Commas are the difference between "I'm going to help my uncle Jack off a horse" and "I'm going to help my uncle, Jack, off a horse."
I was not expecting that
9726143
And that was the idea!
9726318
I thought it was gonna be a birthday present for twilight not good food
Twilight is more scared of ladybugs than quesadillas, considering she constantly ran away from them, anyway, I though what was left in the room were ladybugs anyway XD
9727431
it didn't show in this story, but these short stories take place during the season seven timeline. And Eric's brony, so since the events of season 8's yet to happen, he doesn't know about Twilight's phobia of Ladybugs, because she never told him even though they're extremely close.
In fact, I'm actually trying to think of a way to use that fact in a future story, if I can.
9727462
So Eric only knows about season 7, not season 8, so he doesn't know of any danger in the future, oh well, I wonder what will he do in the school of friendship, Janitor? XD, teacher? perhaps Cozy Glow could trick him, worst seduce him Xd, anyway, crazy thoughts aside, I will be waiting for sequels :D.
I thought he left his porn out.
9753777
Not gonna lie, that’s what I thought at first when I was proofreading this
9753777
She walked in, and found his body pillow Waifu.
Hahahaha I thought it would be something a little more inappropriate never saw that coming lol. Can't wait for the next one
9761107
Glad my little misdirection worked!
Not even read it yet, and I'm already laughing at that picture of Twilight!
9759960
Better yet, a body pillow of Celestia waifu!
Right before the screaming started, the thought popped into my head that it was a damaged book of some sort, but yeah, I guess quesadillas work as well.
Well.. this is hilarious!
Nice job on this - you have me hooked 
But Twilight, what if Princess Celestia heard?
9836143
Glad you liked it and got a good laugh out of it!
actually she is
And here I thought it was either going to be a damaged/written on book, or a meat based food. But this was better.
10004788
Just hope the quesadillas didn’t have bacon bits in them
The Stuff her little bro doesn't want to her to see...Mostly it's
would be 18+ stuff if you are dirty mindedeither way stuff that he took from her or someone else, but then i got just 1 Thought that i learned from the Fandom, BEFORE I GOT TO THE REVELATION! Quesadillas!!!I just then began to laugh and continued to read and then laughed even harder when i knew that i was right!
11497185
Funny thing is, he probably would have reacted in a similar way if he did have some...18+ stuff hidden in his room. He would want to keep his big sisters from seeing it mostly more due to embarrassment; Starlight at least would have teased him mercilessly over it
11497872
That's just too true, and obviously we have enough here around us who would react that way or similar
OOOHHH....THE HORROR !!!!