It had been three weeks since my breakdown. Everyone in the know had finally stopped walking on eggshells around me, but I still caught the odd worried glance. Eros has been making an effort to avoid me, and I'm sure I know why. Don't know who told her, if anyone.
Fucking psychic types.
I sat beside Rainbow in the weather office, waiting while she finished up her paperwork. My bitten and worn pillow was more comfortable than the floor, but I had asked Rainbow to remove my proper bed from here. She only relented when I told her that it was only until my community service was finished.
Speaking of, Rainbow had gotten clever with it. She had asked Twilight to look a couple of things up, but it turns out that helping with the weather team counts towards it. So now, my paycheck goes towards the Crater Greens Fund, and my hours whittle the service away. Rainbow and Twilight had also been sending Tank and Owlicious back and forth, something Rainbow ensures me is a secret project.
"Think of the Cryptodira..."
... What?
"Turtle."
Tank's a tortoise.
A heavy chopping filled the air and broke me out of my musings. Tank flew in through Rainbow's open window and settled on her spare chair. I got up and began gathering up the scattered papers, so I missed whatever exchange was going on up there. Grabbing the last one, I trotted the mass around to the left side of the desk where I knew Rainbow kept clear and jumped up. I dropped them in front of me and placed a paw on them to stop them from flying off again. Tank sat patiently on Rainbow's other side as she read through the latest note. It wasn't long before she was scribbling out something on a piece of scrap paper.
"Aww, that's cute." I tilted my head to stare at Thunderlane. "Rainbow Dash with her ground bound pets, brought down by paperwork."
Rainbow snorted. "Did you want something?"
"Naw, just wanted to poke my head in, let you know that the morning crew's off for the day." He stepped back out into the hallway. "Oh! Uh, Moon Dancer may want to borrow Leo for while, figure out how she did her thing? She said something about a pirate move?" He paused at our confused looks. "Well, she actually said Arr move."
"Not happening any time soon." Rainbow stated, rubbing my back.
Thunderlane shrugged. "Well, see ya later."
Rainbow handed her note to Tank, who stuffed it into his shell. I stretched out and covered as many papers as I could, pinning them down in time for Tank to take off.
"Alright, Leo." Rainbow picked me up as Tank flew out the window. "I'm going to need to drop you off at Fluttershy's for a bit."
<<Why? Aren't I supposed to stay with you?>> I squirmed out of her grip and onto her back.
"Technically, you need to have a member of the guard, the pony appointed to you, or a pony of good standing that has been vouched to and by the guard with you. Taking off for the day!" She called the last part out to the office secretary. She continued once we were in the air. "Being an Element of Harmony counts for the last one. And I need to talk to Twilight about arranging something for us. Besides, Fluttershy said that she's got something for you."
<<Okay.>> I leaned into the breeze we were making as Rainbow flew. All too soon, we were flying over the Daycare, Lulu settling in for her turn with the eggs. We coasted past and Rainbow alighted in front of Fluttershy's cottage. I boredly watched the distant Lulu while waiting for the timid mare to open her door.
"Oh, hello Rainbow, Leo." Fluttershy's soft voice drew my attention back to the door. "Would you like to come in?"
"While I'd like to," Rainbow rubbed the back of her neck, "I've got to jet. Got to meet up with Twilight today. Take care, you two!"
I waved goodbye before allowing Fluttershy to usher me into her home. She quietly led me into a small side room with a chair and a couch. She had me lie down on the couch. She began to leave the room through its only door.
"Tea?" She paused, looking back over her shoulder.
<<Sure.>> I shrugged. <<A spot of milk and sugar, if it's that kind of blend.>> I didn't have long to wait before she returned with a tray with a teapot and a pair of cups. <<So, am I just here for a tea party?>> I asked as she poured me a cup.
"No." She gave me a mildly disapproving look. "You are here for therapy."
I blinked. <<Well, I guess you'd be the expert on animal psychiatry...>>
"Oh, no." Fluttershy giggled. "I'm not licensed for that. He'll be in shortly." She moved to leave again.
<<Hey, wait! Aren't you supposed to stay with me?>> I called after her.
"So long as you are in session, no. Patient confidentiality overrules that." She closed the door behind her.
I sighed and sipped at my tea. Just as it got cool enough for me to hold safely in my paws, the door cracked open. I glanced up, then jerked in surprise as Angel hopped in with a clipboard under one arm.
Thankfully, I didn't spill any of my tea.
"Alright, I'm ready, you look ready." Angel grumbled as he jumped up onto the end table and poured himself a glass. "Let's get this over with." I stared as he settled into the chair. "What?"
"I-I'm sorry." I sputtered, trying to get my brain working again. "It's just... You're a therapist?!" He sighed and nodded. "But, you're just... And the punching and kicking... And all of," I waved a paw at Angel, paws to ear tips and back, "this?! How the fuck?!"
He rolled his eyes. "With careful study and a mail-in course." He clicked a pen. "Now, we're here for you."
"You mean to fix me." I mumbled into my tea.
"Ah-ah!" I flinched as a roll of paper bounced off the top of my head. "No, bad. We're not here to fix shit. Not unless you want us to." Angel placed the roll beside him. "Perhaps we should start at why you're here to begin with, and work back from there?"
"Oh, yeah, let's start with me being a horrible creature. Let's start with why I think I'm a terrible friend that will just drag everyone else around down with me. With the fact that, even though I've accepted that darker part of me, I'm afraid to embrace it!" I growled. "What do you want me to say?" I set my cup off to the side. "That I wish I didn't lose my temper and blow up a chunk of Canterlot? That I wish I didn't murder ponies in their own homes? That I didn't traumatize a score of changelings with my brutality?!"
"Well," Angel looked up at me from taking his notes, "why did you do all of that?"
"I-!" I frowned, looking back on that day. "I... saw some foals. Cocooned. They looked so scared, and... and..." I shuddered. I continued in a whisper. "All I could think of was our pups being in those cocoons, and I felt my anger overtake me. Like I had to punish those who did this, y'know? Like a 'How dare these creatures hurt my precious family' type of thing. And, and I just lost myself to that feeling."
"There's nothing wrong with protecting your children, Leo. Being able to bring that devotion to the children of others, especially of another species, is admirable." Angel tapped the side of his pen against his clipboard. "Really, the only concerning part of this is the fact that you didn't stop once the foals were safely away. Now, from what I understand, you've got something in place to stop this from happening again?" I nodded, and Angel shifted about in his chair. "That's good. Let's talk about something else for a bit. Can you tell me about your parents within your old pack?"
I snorted. "Ah, the stock shrink question. Well, my mother's a sweetheart, a little emotional, but she is very kind and accepting. It takes a lot to get her to hold a grudge." I sighed. "My father, though, was a stern hard ass that I never saw eye to eye with. But he was an honest and respectable m- Umbreon, and still someone I deeply respected."
"I notice the past tense." Angel raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, he passed the winter before we came here." I swallowed the lump in my throat and gave out a weak chuckle. "Arthritis and cancer ganged up on him, and yet death still had to take him in his sleep for fear of the fight he'd put up."
Angel snorted, scribbling a couple more notes down. "Well, I think we have enough for the first session."
I blinked away some gathering tears. "Really?"
The white rabbit nodded. "Yup. You definitely have depression, but I got that from talking with others before the session, this just confirms it."
"Um..."
"I got that information through Fluttershy's conversations with the others. Plus it's not that hard to see." Angel waved his pen. "But there are other conditions that this is making me think about, but I will need more sessions to nail those down. This time in two weeks?"
I shrugged. "Sure."
He whacked me with the roll of paper again. "None of that, be assertive! Get that pep you had back and take charge of your life!"
I gave Angel the largest smile I could make. "Sure!" The treacly sweet voice I used made up for the deadpan.
"Close enough." Angel snorted.
Yay! Glad you and this story are back. Also I hope it stops strangling you soon.
A short, but much needed chapter. Always brighten my day when this story get's updated.
You know, it's always amused me a little bit when men say that they don't want to go to therapy. I know that our culture has defined masculinity as the ability to be emotionally inert, and detached from traumatic events. The thing is, it's easier to sell the idea of therapy to yourself if you re-frame it from being emotionally vulnerable to someone else, into doing assisted emotional engineering. Psychology is as much a hard science as any other medicine, and if it had that logic based, hyper-structured connotations, it might click more with men. No need to make yourself into an emotionless machine when emotions themselves are already so machine-like.
IT'S ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!
Honestly, angel as a therapist makes sense for this version of mlp.
Glad to hear that you're ok. Nice to see this being posted again, but make sure to but yourself first! Its nice to see Leo getting the help she needs for her trauma, and I'm not particularly suprised to see Angel bunny be a therapist, as he seems to be the hard love type. Looking forward to more!
Dont worry, i just recently finished a one chapter story that ive been writing for two years.
Still hasnt gone through yet but im patient.
It lives once more!
The road to recovery is long and a continued effort.
Great chapter, thanks for the update.
Always nice to see a little more of EE. Hope it stops stangling you and just starts tapping you on the back every so often for a more healthy relationship.
Angel the animal psychiatrist? Why didn't we have an animate on this before? Now I know G4 missed a serious potential highlight moment.
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I do not appreciate people using my story to advertise. Please take this elsewhere.
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You mean, I can talk about the hottest game on mobile, RAID: Shadow Legends?
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It's cute how you think that's an actual person and not just a bot.
Yay, more to read!
Also, Discord, holy Tarturus do you owe... well, everyone a massive apology. But especially Zann and Leo.
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Grumble grumble. Figured I'd still reply, just in case.
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Do I need to get Angel and his roll of paper?
Everypony wins!
All tortoises are turtles; Not all turtles are tortoises.
Sounds like Red Rage of Compassion. Look that up.
Meanwhile I've got an outline and everything for my own fic, but every time I go to write it I hit a wall. And SH was supposed to be the easy one!
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This was a running gag in the show itself, so we can't blame fanfic for it.
Glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that, or I would have done a spit take all over my computer. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that Angel's characterization from "She Talks to Angel" isn't canon here, because the idea of that version of Angel as a therapist makes me physically ill.
Woot, not dead!
Glad you are back I missed this wonderful story
I still say Leo, at worst, should've been found Not Guilty by Reason of Temporary Insanity, but we'll see how this develops. She does need therapy, though. Wrong mindset to work through such things without it.
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you have no idea 3;)
I found this story the other day, read all the way up to now, and now that I'm caught up there is an aching need for more.
Please send help, but not Angel Bunny. He's not qualified for this.
Speaking of help, I'm gonna guess now that Leo's problems don't end until she reigns in that rage and learns to use Z Solar Flare.
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For what it's worth, the Fire Z-move is Inferno Overdrive.
This was awesomely amazing come back I'm beyond happy this sorry continues to live on a thriving
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In fairness, we're both wrong since Leo's move was explicitly named Nova Flare. Though, that may just be the R variant.
WOOOOOO!