X-P0N3 raised her hooves triumphantly as the audience cheered. "Well, folks, it's been an amazing Tournament so far! We've had fights that were serious, fights that were silly, and fights that were somewhere in between. But whatever the match, this Tournament has truly shown off the ingenuity, creativity, and dedication of the world's roboticists, and the strength of body, mind, and heart of their creations! Let's hear it for our eight semi-finalists!"
As the Robot Masters stepped up, X-P0N3 began recapping their most prominent victories. "Our frigid fiend Blizzard Man easily proved too much for his opponents, his cold reception sending many - including his first foe, Welsh Standard - packing for warmer climes!" Blizzard Man grinned as he waved to the crowd, thrusting his ski pole into the air. He happily accepted the ribbon that Mr. X affixed to his chest to show he'd made it to the semi-finals.
"Our own personal firebrand, Flame Man, proved too hot to handle for the hottie Boom Woman," X-P0N3 continued, "and his flames truly burned up the rink!" As Flame Man carefully sterilized his ribbon before affixing it to his chest himself, X-P0N3 held one hoof to her mouth and stage whispered into the mic, "Literally. We needed to replace it five times."
As the audience laughed, X-P0N3 moved over to Plant Man, who was clarifying that the manufacture of his ribbon had in no way damage nature. "And Plant Man showed what he was capable of both on and off the battle floor. I gotta say, I had no idea just how many female Robot Masters had been built." She paused, covering her mouth with one hoof. "Or how, uh, anatomically correct their designers had made them. Why would they do that, anyway?"
"Don't remind me!" Plant Man wailed as the audience burst into laughter.
Moving on, X-P0N3 smiled widely at the next Robot Master as he received his ribbon. "And Tomahawk Man dealt swiftly and decisively with each of his opponents, none more than Web Man, the...rather unusual submission whose builder we're...having trouble tracking down." She shrugged as Tomahawk Man waved to the cheering crowd. "Well, nothing to worry about, right? It's not like that's going to be of significance anytime soon.
"Besides, that's nothing compared to our next finalist!" X-P0N3 continued, moving Item 2 to hover over Yamato Man as he lowered his head for his ribbon. "His skills in combat are second only to his skills with his words, playing his opponents' fears and insecurities against them until they fall. And yet, after each fight, he ensures his opponents haven't suffered unduly from his barbs, both verbal and spear." She raised a hoof. "And for all those who liked his first opponent, I have received reports that Merkava not only doesn't hold her defeat against him, but promises to meet him again in the next tournament, and Yamato Man has sworn not to lose to anyone until they fight again! Looks like we've got a classic rivalry here, folks!" The cheers for this were deafening. Vinyl then smirked as she tweaked the mic, ensuring only the audience would hear her next statement. "But I don't care, I ship it!"
As laughter echoed, she tweaked the mic back to normal before moving to the next contender. "And while Centaur Man did a really good showing for himself, it was his first match that really sticks in our minds, with ESCAPE's maker calling the match rather than watch her destroy herself to try for victory. For those worried, ESCAPE is doing just fine, and is eager to try again next year with new weapons." This brought cheers from the crowd as Centaur Man took his ribbon.
"And our Medieval Marvel Knight Man proved that valor is the better part of victory," X-P0N3 continued as Knight Man's ribbon was attached to his armor. "His sturdy build and courageous dedication earned him victory after victory, and some of his opponents - like Twitch, his first - decided that, for them, discretion was the better part of valor.
"And last, but certainly not least, we have Wind Man!" The audience cheered wildly for this last bot. "A favorite amongst our audience for his quick thinking in saving them from the chemical leak caused by Skunk Man, who - in case anyone was curious about the exact details - was disqualified for deliberately endangering humans in violation of the First Law of Robotics and for improperly filling out his entry form, failing to properly inform us of the true nature of his weapons." As Wind Man accepted his ribbon, X-P0N3 raised her mic. "And much like that first opponent, Wind Man really blew the competition away!"
As the cheers rocked the arena from the audience with various parts calling out for their favorites, X-P0N3 lifted her hooves to try and get quiet. "And now we have a special event! As promised, the eight finalists will face a special event before moving on to determine which is the mightiest new robot! And now, the moment you've all waited for...the revelation of the exact nature of that special event!" She paused as silence fell. "These eight finalists...will each get to face off in combat against none other than Mega Man himself!"
The audience screamed in excitement, and chants of "ME-GA MAN!" echoed over the stage. Mega Man waved to the crowd with a smile, glancing towards X-P0N3, knowing what was coming.
"And just to make things interesting..." X-P0N3 continued, pulling out a small globe. The audience once more fell silent as she opened the globe, manipulating the device therein. Each of the eight finalists' eyes glowed red. "I'll be using devices in each of the finalists victory ribbons to control them so they'll help me try to take over the world!" She let out her best wicked cackle, which still managed to sound adorable. "And for anyone who's surprised, I'll be auctioning off the Golden Gate Bridge in Warehouse 2 at 6:30 tonight. Bidding starts at one dollar!"
With that, X-P0N3 teleported herself, Mr. X, and the eight Robot Masters away.
Out of curiosity, Mega Man hung around to see just how many people wound up in Warehouse 2 by 6:30. He could only groan, burying his face in his hands when he saw how full it was. He found much more humor in the situation when distinctive music began playing at exactly 6:30.
Rick-Roll Man!
Megaman better not destroy Yamato Man! He deserves to live with Merkava!
7057733 But if he does he better watch his back.
With all the weirdness out of the way, let's watch everything go to pot.
For the simple admission that the female sex are categorized in a singular, collective adjective designated as "hot".
What's this? Why, it's a statement of the plot, and better yet, it flows naturally in one sen- moving on.
I don't really get why this is particularly necessary, but whatever, selling off monuments that you weren't described as owning yet for a buck is an excellent use of time... even though, aside from trying to put it back, owning it would be completely useless except for bragging rights.
Of course Vinyl would Rickroll.
Vinyl, you adorable troll
Bravo.
7057733 I ship it, too
Damn that adorable little mastermind... I wanted the Golden Gate Bridge, too...
Another enjoyable chapter. Good job.
"And for anyone who's surprised, I'll be auctioning off the Golden Gate Bridge in Warehouse 2 at 6:30 tonight. Bidding starts at one dollar!"
I'd like to open the bid at one-million dollars!
Ship Happens.
<sniff> That was beautiful. I'm proud of you, Vinyl.
7057766
The bit about the Golden Gate was a play on the old phrase, "And if you believe that, I've got a bridge I can sell you", referring to someone being especially gullible. She was poking fun at the fact no one realized that Mr. X and X-P0N3 were Wily and Vinyl.
Well, time to open the cans of whoop-ass.
7058008 Ah, alright then.
I wonder how annoyed the eight masters will be after this, my guess is, not at all.
7057852
Sorry, I had to do it
With everything being said about Merkava, I have to say: "Dear God, what have I done?" While at the same time...
i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/217/484/7ed.gif
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
7058153
What can I say? Merkava was fun to work with...and will be.
well, i would have honestly picked
7058186 Glad I could help.
7058186 and we look forward to her eventual return.
Meanwhile, Boom Woman rusts in pieces... What? Her creator was in love with her and has vowed to rebuild her Frankenstein style?
7058104 Yep your probably right on the money. Probably the one reason these robot could never be free like wily wants, a complete lack of spite. Although I suppose none of them have the same programming in them preventing them from murdering the crap out of Vinyl.
bwahahahahahahahahahah priceless. this chapters end was perfect. Vinyl is most epic troll
Ahh, I see Vinyl has good taste in shipping, I'm so proud!
Keep 'em coming Tats, keep em coming...
Vinyl is gonna broadcast the entire thing as "part of FART Tournament"...
But will she sell ad spaces?
Oh, Vinyl. You evil little filly...
7057719 Super Trolly Robot... Rick Roll Man!
7057733 ...I think I ship it.
Vinyl's such an as...tley.
I had nothing else.
7059340 Of course now! For she is the ultimate evil for not giving other things publicity! MWAHAHAHAA!
You know, I'm not sure if this has said before or not (and I'm too lazy to go look), but I believe the actual canon reason for why Mega Man loses his Master Weapon powers after each of his adventures is that he gets rid of them himself. The reason being that having all that power apparently... does things to his psyche, or perhaps he absorbs personality bits from the enemies he fights and whose power he takes, so if he didn't eject his weapons he could turn into a dangerous and unpredictable force that might hurt people. Fatally.
7060989
It has been stated.
I prefer my explanation of Wily doing it to him somehow, for his own reasons.
That ending!
I wonder how much are going to pay in the end. Also, a good distraction, let them think of the bridge instead of the tiny white filly that told everyone the evil plan.
Nice distraction, plus I bet Mega Man just wanted a quiet evening before he had to go fight 8 robots.
Well, so Skunk Man creator cannot sue, whatever.
We need this to happen in real life. Not the ‘take over the world bit’, but rather, ‘see how many people would try to outbid each other for the Golden Gate Bridge, and then Rick roll them all for their efforts’
The fact so many people got fooled was bloody hilarious, only way it could have been better was if dr light was said to be among the bidders but was recording the reaction as he was playing along.