Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.
Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06
Hiatus Bonus Chapter
Research Notes: The Crystal Heart
Dear Princess Cadance,
I think the contractor for this castle must have been a crystal pony, this thing contrasts so badly with the rest of Ponyville that it may as well be me.
Anyway, I was killing some time doing some research, and something came to my mind about the Crystal Heart.
I noticed both after we defeated King Sombra, and when the Crystal Empire was announced as the locale for the games, the heart lit up and shot lights across the sky.
So if it's a representation of the love and joy of your citizens, does it light up at all when your crystal ponies have orgasms?
Sincerely,
Princess Twilight Sparkle
To my sister-in-law Twilight,
Yes, the Crystal Heart has been known to flicker a few times through the night. I just wish I could see it when Shining is rutting me. He's an amazing lover.
Not that you'd know anything about that.
Sincerely,
Princes Mi Amore CadenzaP.S. I hope Spike isn't eating too much of your castle.
Dear Cadance,
No worries. Fluttershy taught me Dragonrend last week. It's worked absolute wonders.
-Twilight
Oh good. As for your overzealous needs and desires, have you tried a mime pony?
They'd be able to do unspeakable things to you.
Yes, that's right. Hiatus bonus chapters are back.
Now to wait to see how long it is before people point out that this is being updated while on hiatus.
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OH THAT IS SOOOO BAD! I LOVE IT!
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lu6r28Cx4M1qczvpto1_500.png
WHY ARE YOU PUTTING STUFF OUT ON A HIATUS
4588205
I think it's for until the new season comes out.
i1130.photobucket.com/albums/m533/FordFrontier/ohh.gif
4588243 no duh.
I did that as a joke
4588280
my bad, there I go taking things too seriously again.
Uhm... wasn't Cadance's name "Cadance Notevil Goodpony" rather than "Mi Amore Cadenza"? Or am I confusing series right now?
4588282 everybody does it
4588283 You are thinking Friendship is Witchcraft.
Dragonrend: like a spray bottle, only with the Thu'um.
Also, huzzah for hiatus chapters.
Most Excellent, Good Sir.
Ah, good.
Came for the pony, stayed for the mime joke.
Thanks for the laugh! You're awesome!
I was waiting for these Hiatus chapters to arrive
Superlative "was."
Something that gaudy must have been Celestia's idea. Princess Twilight was too happy and too powerful, and with the destruction of the Golden Oaks Library, she was finally able to leave
HickvilleRedneck RidgePonyville. However, that tyrant was terrified that our beloved Princess would overthrow her ample ass. So, while Princess Twilight was busy saving the world for the seventh time (three more and she qualifies for a free foot long sub), Princess Incestia activated her sinister plan to plant the ugliest crystal tree castle in the middle ofPodunkopolisPonyville. Now our Princess has her own castle, but it is beyond horrendous and she has to share it with thered shirtsrest of the elements. You win this time you troll, but Princess Twilight Sparkle will inevitably usurp you.KBO.
4589341
Remind me, how many years did Twilight spend trying to get her brother to fuck her? And yet she judges Applejack for this shit.
The video in the end was related to Dangan Ronpa for some reason, I would ask why that was there, but I'm guessing it's my fault. Anyway, I'm guessing Cadance is used to Twilight's attitude to respond to her so casually like that now.
4589587 It is unclear how old our glorious princess is, however I believe she may have been pursuing Shining Armor since puberty. And as for the Applejack thing, Princess Twilight just wants to have a good time, going no further than casual sex. While Applejack and her family are a bunch of inbred hicks.
4588297
Yeah I just fucked up big time this time
Dear Princess Candy:
If you may, I'd like to borrow your crystal heart for a minute or two-thousand. it's the only power capable of pranking your sunn-butted auntie
Your prank-buddy, Discord.
To my dearest niece:
I shall require your crystal heart for a few hours. I need it to pull off the ultimate prank on Discord
Your favorite aunt, Princess Celestia.
4589975 Stop arguing!
4595702
Nu!
4595712 LEGASP! Another troll challenges moi!? I will read no such thing, poopy head!
4595736
Go back to the human world, non troll!
4595749 How dare thee!? I'll have you know I've gotten into more than enough pointless arguments on this website about ships!
4595769
So I'm guessing you ship OctaScratch? Or possibly even PinkieShy? (Why don't we continue this conversation elsewhere instead of spamming the comments with utter nonsense?)
4595797 (Sure, I guess. PM me with more spam.)
Fluttershy taught me Dragonrend last week. It's worked absolute wonders.
I love you, man.
...I see what you did there...
4618401 You know it!
4622762 No plans.
Dragonrend would have no effect on Spike. All it does is keep a dragon from flying temporarily, and Spike doesn't even have wings.
That pun was criminal. You're going to jail now.